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Serpentine Cougar

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  1. Just started Assassin's Apprentice by Robin Hobb because I heard good things about the Farseer Trilogy. Haven't gotten very far in it yet, though.
  2. I don't know if anyone mentioned this before, but if you pre-order the game from Steam, Direct2Drive, or GamersGate, you'll get a free copy of Space Siege. Not sure if that's a good deal or not, as I don't remember Space Siege getting many good reviews.... Note that Alpha Protocol is 4 cents more expensive at Steam than the other two (yeah, huge difference, I know).
  3. Depends on how they'd go about it; I'd have to see it and read reviews before deciding whether or not it's something I'd actually want to play.
  4. Hey, nice new sig! Looks pretty sweet! :D

  5. ^ Got me to try Izarc, a really nice unzipping program!
  6. Okay idea, but I don't see how owning the world's supply of ice cream could constitute taking over the world... Not going to sleep until you see the sun coming up over the horizon.
  7. Buckle up, for tomato devil and his mini-me promise to conquer the entire eastern African nation with giant spandex wearing barest giraffes. That's what happened when Hitler's ghost arose from his deep grave and screamed, "Salt Jedi shall not be served with cooked mustard." So Tomato Devil decided not to serve Jedi his favorite food condiment, mustard, and instead gave them his new creation a new time. The Rach condiment was everyone's favorite style of salad bar dressing. It tasted rather nasty to the Tomato Devil who then decided it to feed noobs who exploded into a raging laughter after having hot, wild barbecue sauce that burned on their hair on their itsy bitsy fingers. The tomato jumped and said that he is stupid like your momma in a psychotic episode that lasted ten days. Tomato was owned by and his pet the apricot, so he whined like a little kid. Suddenly, Judge Judy noticed noticed that carving knives look like drunken bears with inferiority complexes involving rubber ducks. As they looked for fried doorknobs and more gumdrops covered in glowing pools of hypertonic solution for the spoon of water that smells really bad and murders smurfs. But now now did they not drink paint and ducks throwing knives with poisoned handles because a sneaky bear wearing green galoshes filled with cranberry juice shot a Parmesan cheese grenade at the jedi. Tomato Devil ate the sneaky bear and burped a lion with multiple heads and a snake bit the jedi in the toe. This caused an explosion of bunnies by holy atheists flinging grenades as well as chihuahuas singing sting because they licked walls and paint balls itching like a Eskimo laser. Then Doctor O'Reilly drank some Irsih Beer poisoned by Giant Monkeys, but he picked up a lasergun and shoved off of the car tat Rickrolled Tomato Devil into the distant future where Star Destroyers ate smashed peanuts invented by Doctor Doolittle in order to kill Bill Billingsly. Ventriloquating Dwarves who sing dark ditties like the Dingle Dangle Pot Roast Baker's Man Pie Song. The giant scorpion eater Pillsbury Doughboy pancake bomb flew through the vacuum eating scorpions and spanking Happy Giraffe's large nose filled with Aunt Jemima's custard hose. Even electronic flying ducks cannot type a thing to save brain pancake the money crystal elderly hand grenades exploded in Southern Antarctica. Canada's currency likes to freak out like a dog with Dwarf Disorders who can't sing happy noodle gas deleting day songs about Michael Jackson's frying pan with kids who belong on newspaper. The Scarlet Ibis that burned in hell then invented fighting ligers colored him purple like grapes. Devil Driver drove devils to the dust devil bar and bought them devil beer for devilish little gnomes who sold hallucinogenic iPods made from stethoscope mannequins. Mario and Luigi ate trippy mushrooms which made Daleks from preserved fruit from Siberia. If fighting Giant Monkeys results in chewed apples then the Tomato Devil will inevitably die with smashed peanuts. "Burn with Happy Vikings" said the Chief Monkey Spoon Pillow as he burned Happy Jack's Pancakes which made him climax very quickly while singing Brandenburg Concerto in Lebanese whilst sucking a quarter. R2, do Boogiee Woogiee with the serial killer or I'll pass wind in your nether regions while doing a dance called the Dinosaur Defecation. I eat Chuck Norris shaped biscuits while sipping Chuck Norris Honey Syrup whilst fondling bears wearing silk stockings. Astonishingly, beaver exploded in a fit of diarrhea containing peas and applejacks with eczema invented by lonely horses with pineapple balloon jackets. Still, Megatron let loose a horde of Lesbians with Chimpanzees eating bags of "Jellybeans." said I. Copper spaceships representing fairies flew through Obamaville, Georgia While Dancing in the Prozac Dust while inhaling gaseous pizza fragments during metal storms driving magnets powered by killer rabbits gifted with long teeth. Malevolently, Miffy ate bears of doom, fat Dwarves made mistakes while driving, and squirrels discovered fire by rubbing their faces together while spitting bullets from their rear ends. Farting thus, after intercourse is unwise unless Herpes is present for he had some tequila sauce up his large nose. He then inserted monkeys into the thrustmaster's mailbox where they least expected more monkeys with spears and guns and roses loaded with Chocolate bullets and spermatozoa with boxygen. So after silken bunnies summoned Zeus with pungee and bungee, the malicious mythril monkeys ate Zeus the gassy with Ranch the Monkeyherder. But since the flying-gecos ate Zeus, they couldn't summon Hitler's demonic baby chainsaw gun armed with more guns and mayonnaise-filled grenades. "By the power of the Daleks invested in me by Wells Fargo, I hereby decree that all meatbags will dance under the fat palace with many large monkeys." said I, King of Pain. Sting the Magic Dragon lived in Vulgaria. His mother came from the Temple of Psychotic Broken Clocks. His Father was a box of fat canary wedges building monkey genitalia armed with chop suey throwing Chinese paninis into the Great Beyond. However, Kung Fu Master Gigglecream swallowed his bag of tomatoes and silvery onions while diving into a DUNG PILE! However, since big jugs are not that edible, wookies fart green gases which explode. Butt only says the queef bubblez fry boxygen, but what happened when Black Mesa East blew into tiny shards of bubble wrap which shrink was catastrophic, it scared the *** out of JOE MAMMA! "ROCK ON" said Manson the Cake Throwing Jerk. "Um, this might not taste right, but it sure does taste like fried chicken." And then, MOTER ****ER, you'll wish that staple was only the beginning of your genital mutilation. And then the monkey flinged doodey at everything in sight for miles and someone is bound to notice the sight, that is for certain. What bothers the Brotherhood of Bob Haters Local#345 is bloody, filled with viscous pustules, dweedling animals such as the flaming lard of humongous proportions. Rickrolling is the lamest, until it...scratch that... Masticating zebras only puke blue inbreds and red woozey floozey rubber duckies that make twisty mcjigglywiggly-swirleyworley in their own minds filled with n00by teabagging no goodniks. Whose bright idea was it to call the wieener police without telling Tom Anderson that his tool shed was crammed full with liquidious fleshbags doing something we call extremely revolting. Meanwhile, in Southern Chinatwon, someone stole Tomato's mojo, stuffing it up his large potato shaped bong, with impunity, and scared some dingus that was dweedling down heater vents. This meant BUTT PROBLEMS for Butthead, but he'd down laxatives while Beavis lit a bong full OF BARF. Red Foreman smacked some kettle head with a Tomato Devil, beating down donald trump. Channel 7 harbors terrorists at ten reports that launch porkbellies are actually somebody's sick with the flu. When barf bags burn, they are actually quite fragrant. Why is this thread filled with insipid garbage? Because the contributors to this thread don't really give a rat's @ss. Chuck Norris is DEAD, but his spirit lives. Fluff'd up cottage cheese is revolting when bacon is mixed nuts in sheep dip. Nad Face burns salad whenever she goes fartknockering on the DANCINGTAIL BRIGADE!!! Unfortunately, they underestimated the Fartbag's resolve to destroy every freakin' dweedling cat pukes up monkey doodie, so the
  8. If you wanted to write down the script from KotoR, how would you do it? In more linear games it's easy, you'd just write down what happens and who says what. But with a game like this, with branching dialogue and planets you can go to in whatever order you want, how would you transcribe it? One way I thought it might be possible is to give short codes after each choice, and the reader uses the search function of whatever program they're using to find where to continue, like in many of the faqs on GameFAQs.com. Here's what the prologue from the game would be like this way: Show spoiler (hidden content - requires Javascript to show) [Above a greyish-green planet, a ship is under attack by a horde of small fighters. Green and red lazer blasts fly back and forth as the fighters swarm about the ship, which is hit by a volley of red lazers that explode on one of its wings. The fighters move to other targets as the ship leans awkwardly to one side, having apparently taken a very bad hit.] [Meanwhile in a cabin within the ship, you are sleeping fitfully, tossing and turning before finally waking and sitting up. You aren't wearing much. The ship takes another hit and shakes violently, and you stand up. The battle can be heard raging outside the ship, tremors rack the vessel as sounds of explosions come from other parts of the ship, and warning alarms blare loudly. A uniformed man suddenly runs in and addresses you.] Trask: We've been ambushed by a Sith battle fleet! The Endar Spire is under attack! Hurry up - we don't have much time! 1. Who are you? - {WHOY1} 2. The Endar Spire? - {SPIR1} {SPIR1} Trask: Did you fall out of your bunk and hit your head? The Endar Spire is the ship we're stationed on - this ship! You probably don't even know who I am, do you? - {WHOY1} {WHOY1} Trask: I'm Trask Ulgo, ensign with the Republic Fleet. I'm your bunk mate here on the Endar Spire. We work opposite shifts; I guess that's why you haven't seen me before. Trask: Now hurry up, we have to find Bastila! We have to make sure she makes it off the ship alive! 1. Who's Bastila? - {WHOB1} 2. Forget it - I'm looking after my own skin! - {CWRD1} {WHOB1} Trask: Bastila's the commanding officer on the Endar Spire. Well, not an officer really. But she's the one in charge of this mission. Trask: One of our primary duties is to guarantee her survival in the event of enemy attack! You swore an oath just like everyone else on this mission. Now it's time to make good on that oath! - {YOU01} {CWRD1} Trask: You swore an oath to protect Bastila when you signed up with this mission, just like everyone else in the crew! Now's the time to make good on that oath. Trask: I know she may not have an official rank in the fleet, but she's the one in charge of this mission and it's our duty to protect her! - {YOU01} {YOU01} 1. (If you are a soldier-class character:) - {YOU02} 2. (If you are a scout-class character:) - {YOU03} 3. (If you are a scoundrel-class character:) - {YOU04} {YOU02} Trask: I've heard all about your reputation: elite combat training, tops in your class. It's no wonder you were hand picked for this mission. Trask: Word is the officers haven't seen a recruit with your kind of potential in twenty years. But all that potential doesn't mean a thing if you can't deliver when it counts! Trask: We're soldiers, we're trained for combat. Bastila's going to need men and women like us at her side during this attack! - {HELP1} {YOU03} Trask: I heard what everyone's saying about you: you've explored the farthest reaches of the galaxy, you've visited planets I've never even heard of. Trask: People with your skills and abilities are hard to find; it's no wonder the Republic recruited you for this mission. But now's the time to prove yourself! Trask: I know you're a scout and not a soldier, but Bastila needs all troops at her side during the attack! - {HELP1} {YOU04} Trask: I know all about your reputation, how you used to smuggle spice and blasters along the Corellian Run. I guess the Republic figured since they couldn't catch you, they might as well hire you. Trask: And I'll admit, the Republic is in desperate need of someone with your kind of skills. Desperate enough to overlook your shady past. Trask: But now that you've signed on for this mision you're part of the Republic fleet. And Bastila needs all troops at her side during this attack! - {HELP1} {HELP1} 1. Okay, let's go help Bastila! - {OKAY1} 2. Oath or no oath - I'm heading to the escape pods! - {CWRD2} {CWRD2} Trask: Don't be stupid! You won't stand a chance against the Sith by yourself. We've got to stick together if we want to make it out of this alive. - {OKAY1} {OKAY1} Trask: So hurry up and grab your gear. You need to suit up so we can get out of here. You: Okay. (If you wait around:) Trask: Come on, we have to hurry! The Sith might already be boarding the ship to try and capture Bastila. Trask: Put your equipment on so we can get out of here. You: Okay. [You put your clothes on and pick up your weapon (you have a choice between a blaster pistol and a short sword).] Trask: Okay, let's move out. Trask: We should stick together; you'll have more success with a party than on your own. Trask: Because of the attack this room is in lockdown, but don't worry - I've got the override codes. You'll have to let me unlock the door. [Trask unlocks the door, then turns back to you. The door slides open, revealing a white corridor. Part of one wall has been damaged, and a utility droid is working on it.] Trask: Now that the door's open, you better take the lead again. [You start down the hall and Trask follows. Suddenly a man's voice is heard.] Carth: This is Carth Onasi - the Sith are threatening to overrun our position! We can't hold out long against their firepower! All hands to the bridge! Trask: That was Carth contacting us on our portable communicators. He's one of the Republic's best pilots! He's seen more combat than the rest of the Endar Spire's crew put together. Trask: If he says things are bad, you better believe it. We have to get to the bridge to help defend Bastila! Trask: There's a map of the Endar Spire and a copy of Carth's message in your electronic journal, just in case we get seperated. You: Let's move out. [As you near the door at the other end of the corridor, Trask speaks up again.] 1. (If you are a scoundrel-class character:) - {TSPK1} 2. (If you are a scout- or soldier-class character:) - {TSPK2} {TSPK1} Trask: That door's locked, and I don't have the codes to open it. You'll have to try to unlock it if we want to get past. You: Okay. - {UNLK1} {TSPK2} Trask: That door's locked. I don't have the codes to open it, but I'll use my security skills to slice into the access panel and open the door. You: Okay.- {UNLK1} {UNLK1} [The door is unlocked and starts to slide open. On the other side of the door, a man wearing the same uniform as Trask shoots at two helmeted figures in shiny metal armor. They shoot back at him and kill him, and he joins a fallen comrade on the ground.] Trask: These Sith must be the advance boarding party! Trask: For the Republic! [With Trask's help, you defeat the Sith soldiers.] Trask: I've got a feeling that won't be our last battle with the Sith. Good thing we have medpacs to heal our wounds. It might be a good idea to use one now before our next battle. You: Okay. [After passing two corridors that are blocked by debris and filled with smoke, you go through another door into a room where more Sith soldiers await you. The bodies of several men wearing Republic uniforms are strewn about the floor. You fight the Sith and move on. The next corridor leads to an intersection where a heated battle is taking place. The Sith take out the Republic fighters with a few well-placed grenades, however, before you can do anything. You fight them and find that all except one of the doors leading to the intersection are damaged and can't be opened. Through that door a man and woman are fighting fiercely with lightsabers. The man wears Sith armor (but doesn't wear a helmet) and wields a red lightsaber, while the woman wields a blue one and wears a light-colored tunic.] Trask: It's a dark Jedi! This fight is too much for us - we better stay back. All we'd do is get in the way. [The woman eventually kills the Sith man, but a moment later an explosion kills her too. Suddenly, more Sith soldiers appear.] Trask: That was one of the Jedi accompanying Bastila. Damn, we could have used her help! [You defeat these Sith and proceed to another door.] 1. (If you equipped the blaster pistol:) - {EQIP1} 2. (If you equipped the short sword:) - {EQIP2} {EQIP1} Trask: The bridge is just beyond that door. You better equip your melee weapon. There isn't much room on the bridge, and it's suicide to use a blaster in close quarters. Trask: I should equip a melee weapon, too. Either that, or I'll have to stay back and use my blaster. 1. Okay. - {EQIP2} 2. What if they have lightsabers? - {WTIF1} {WTIF1} Trask: Your melee weapon is made using a cortosis weave. It's strong enough to stand up against anything, even a lightsaber. [You put away your blaster and take out your short sword instead.] - {EQIP2} {EQIP2} [You have arrived at the bridge. A group of Sith soldiers is fighting a few last Republic fighters, and bodies litter the floor. After killing the Sith and looking around to find all the other Republic soldiers dead, Trask speaks.] Trask: Bastila's not here on the bridge - they must have retreated to the escape pods! We better head that way too. Trask: The Sith want Bastila alive, but once she's off the ship there's nothing stopping them from blasting the Endar Spire into galactic dust! [After following a door that leads into another corridor, Trask notices something through another door and stops.] Trask: There's something behind here. [A bald Sith in dark blue garments steps forward amidst the steam and smoke that occupies the corridor. He carries a double-sided red lightsaber.] Trask: Damn - another Dark Jedi! I'll try to hold him off, you get to the escape pods! Go! [Trask darts through the door to fight him, and a sudden explosion closes the door behind him, obscuring both of them from view. Trask has bought you the time you need to escape, and you make your way to the starboard section of the ship. You hear Carth speak again.] Carth: This is Carth Onasi on your personal communicator. I'm tracking your position through the Endar Spire's life support systems. Carth: Bastila's escape pod is away - you're the last surviving crew member of the Endar Spire! I can't wait for you much longer; you have to get to the escape pods! 1. (If you are a scoundrel-class character:) - {CLAS1} 2. (If you are a scout- or soldier-class character:) - {CLAS2} {CLAS1} Carth: But be careful. There's a Sith patrol just down the corridor. You'll have to sneak past him. 1. Okay. - {OKAY2} 2. How can I sneak past him? - {SNEK1} {SNEK1} Carth: First, make sure you have a stealth field generator equipped on your belt. You can't sneak properly without one. Carth: The generator will wrap you in a cloaking effect so you can sneak past the Sith. Just be careful you don't get too close or he might notice someone's there. You: Okay. - {OKAY2} {OKAY2} [You sneak past the guard (an explosion further down the corridor draws the soldier away, making it easier to sneak by him) and enter a room with a couple Sith soldiers. On the other side of the room is a closed door beside a computer terminal and an unactivated silver droid that looks to be in disrepair. You can't sneak past the Sith here, so you engage them in combat instead. When they have been killed, Carth contacts you again.] - {CRTH0} {CLAS2} [You find a Sith trooper down a corridor and kill him, then enter a room with two more Sith soldiers. On the other side of the room is a closed door beside a computer terminal and an unactivated silver droid that looks to be in disrepair. When you have killed the Sith here, Carth contacts you again.] - {CRTH0} {CRTH0} Carth: Be careful! There's a whole squad of Sith Troopers on the other side of that door! You need to find some way to thin their numbers. Carth: You could reprogram the damaged assault droid to help you, if you have enough repair parts. Carth: Or you could use computer spikes to slice into the terminal and use the Endar Spires's security systems against the Sith. [However you choose to proceed (you can even do both), the Sith in the next room are killed and you move on to the next room. On the left are a row of entrances to escape pods, while on the right a man in an orange and blue uniform is waiting beside a computer terminal. As he speaks, you recognize his voice.] Carth: You made it just in time! There's only one active escape pod left. Come on, we can hide out on the planet below! 1. Who are you? - {CRTH1} 2. How do I know I can trust you? - {CRTH1} {CRTH1} Carth: I'm a soldier with the Republic, like you. We're the last two crew members left on the Endar Spire. Carth: Bastila's escape pod's already gone, so there's no reason for us to stick around here and get shot by the Sith. Now come on - there'll be time for questions later! [The last escape pod leaves the ship, hurtling towards the planet below. As the pod enters the atmosphere, the Endar Spire blows up behind it. The escape pod falls through the air and lands somewhere amidst the tall buildings of a large city.] What do you think? Would this work for a script of the rest of the game, too?
  9. I got 'em both for only $5.99 in Good Old Games' sale this past weekend. Don't know when I'll find time to play these old classics, though. Might be a while.
  10. While it is sad that all the RPG makers seem to be gravitating towards MMOs, there is one good thing. It'll be the indie developers who make the next great single player RPGs, and they won't cost as much to buy.
  11. Looks nice, but Battlefront and Jedi Knight already quench my thirst for Star Wars FPS action. I don't think I'll be getting CoD just for this.
  12. Lol, that's awesome. I bet it would taste horrible if you actually tried to mix it, though.
  13. We would all be looking at the wrong castles. What if you had a dream that told you to sacrifice your only child to the Shrike?
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