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Everything posted by REDJOHNNYMIKE

  1. People still play this? Kill it with infernal flames!
  2. *crashes through ceiling* Oh... Hi... Happy Burfday... I bring you a shrubbery! stupid catapult not aiming with the correctness
  3. Fire nailguns at random wildlife Chinups on the new trusses Cinderblockput (shotput, but rougher on your hands) Run-through-the-spiked-ditch-and-hope-you-dont-trip marathon Mix mortar with bare hands (fun and squishy as long as you don't have any broken skin for the acid to get through Who can fall off the roof last Who can drink the most gatorade Who can tell the most vulgar joke, while drinking gatorade and trying to not fall off the roof Loud noises and you, an instructional seminar "Testing" the garage door (opencloseopencloseopenclose wheeeee!!!!) Electricity *music* these are a few of my favorite games! */music*
  4. @ Toten, It's okay, you can think that.
  5. @ Aash, that was a joke however true... And as for pac/ms pacman I was referring to gobbling up all that yummy white stuff and chomping the occasional cherry. @ Herbie, *raises hand* you see, she just made it across the border and caught her dress on the barbed wire fence so she was really cold
  6. Well I wasn't here so it not mah fault Happy Burfums! Stay Kawaii!
  7. Probably didn't even play atari, pinball or pacman. Probably sat in the corner brushing her doll's hair and accused pacman of being pornographic.
  8. Seasick?!!! Poor dog is gonna catch Needasammichitis from her!!! 0_Q p.s. stole you monacle foo
  9. I find it hilarious to think on the reality side of this... Any idea what the middle school kids who aren't sitting around playing through 30 hours of gameplay and dialog choices, trying to get their character sexed are doing? They are hanging out with girls at school, making the same dialog choices (probably a little less corny too) and getting laid before they can even fill out a condom. That's life morons. Fact 1. Family guy has more sexual content than mass effect. Fact 2. Most disrespectful attempts to acquire sex in Mass Effect lead you to saving the galaxy as a virgin. Fact 3. In the time it takes you to reach that point in the game (heck, finish the "tutorial") you could be in bed with a member of the opposite sex that actually is interactive. Fact 4. If you do not work for it you do not get it. If I was EA/Bioware I would be snatching up the best attorneys available and prepare my bank account for a nice little influx. Media like Fox News will only allow their side of the story to be told anyway, so here's what I would do... Offer an exclusive interview with a rival network to discuss the "heinous slander" which a media outlet has used to try and hurt sales of my product... Offer solutions of either a Lawsuit or the network apologizing, providing me/my company a 30 minute uninterupted (love how the only expert got about a minute of time and was dropped before the discussion) interview to address the lies about my company and actually discuss how the problems brought up by the original panel can be easily solved (if you don't want your kids playing with your toys lock them in the gun cabinet with the rest of your toys). Finally I would require that all parties liable for the damage to my company will beat the entirety of Mass Effect on insane difficulty as well as acquire every achievement so they can understand the sheer amount of creative time and effort put into the work of art that was dragged through the mud on their network. This will be recorded to prevent someone else playing it for them. P.S. Fox News hates Ron Paul yeah. they do. edit: it's the same as guns, if you want it you can get it wether or not you're allowed to have it. Did no one else enjoy wonderbra adds in the paper when they were knee high to a grasshopper?
  10. Oh, I'm still not going DX10 for a while, it just annoys the crap out of me that it isn't stable on my system when it should be playable at decent settings with all drivers properly updated. It was probably the worst artifacting I've seen in any game I've played. Even the cutscenes were horribly torn. In the opening sequence of the demo you are in the back of a plane preparing for a dive to the island below... Exterior to the aircraft half the plane was missing and I could clearly see the background through it, inside all the characters where blacked out except for their eyes which I could see the entire spheroid models of complete with the textures that aren't possibly viewable during normal gameplay, during the jump was when the artifacting really kicked in, I had the entire screen pretty much broken up with a hazy copy of the entire screen Picture-in-Pictured over top of it, the island itself was nearly unplayable. I have a decent system setup with everything updated and running properly and no problems with any other recent game I've played. I hope they've done a lot of recoding since the demo build. And as for the pizza I was only kidding, it wouldn't last a week.
  11. While occasionally annoying and often hypocritical I believe gangland philosophy is the best representation of my opinion on the topic... Try and steal my culture, I'll put you in the ground.
  12. Heh, my sister wants me to hook her up with a wacom when I put together her computer. 9X12! I told her she should just use the money to have pizza delivered to my place for a month. Crysis demo was completely screwed up for me, I'll wait for a few patches and maybe a DX10 card before I touch it again.
  13. Kind of odd sometimes but the only one I haven't seen already mentioned... Megatokyo Ph34r my 1337 c0mp0n3n75, 7h3y h4v3 z0mbi3 PWN1ng p0w3r!!!!
  14. I know you're getting old and everything might seem a little creaky and worn and not be working as well as it should, but look on the bright side... hmmm... not really sure where I was going with that Just try not to decay all over the birthday cake while I figure it out.
  15. @LIAYD, I've seen lots of videos... with... russian girls, which one are you referring to?
  16. Happy Natalia Day!!! May get the muchly of sexah KGB agents in provocative situations in international waters! No I don't get my holidays mixed up! XP
  17. You see the main problem is that this is not all one person who consistently sends messages to someone's old number, much of it is random crap that seems to be sent out to any number the sender has ever seen (No, I will not "FWD FWD FWD!!!") and I wouldn't be surprised if people with free messaging are just picking numbers at random. I don't want to track down every single one and explain the whole thing to each of them (you would be surprised how long it takes to explain to someone that you aren't the person who used to use that number), so I'm sticking with my original plan here. If you spam the phone we KittySpam your face! Also, I don't feel like changing the number again because then I'll just have to explain that I'm not Joe's old boyfriend Raphael from the gym. I have plotted a graph where it gets worse with every new number
  18. Star Wars?!!! this is blasphemy this is madness
  19. Yeah and if your TV remote or vibrator goes down then you're still in business.
  20. Okay so a couple months ago I got a cellphone *teh gaspzorz, he is so high tech!* and here's my issue, apparently they give you someone else's number the second they discontinue service and then send out a worldwide email to everyone who never got around to talking to that person, exlaining that they should make up for it by sending stupid texts to their old number... 1. If I or anyone else who ever used this number wanted to call you back we would've got in touch. 2. I AM NOT FREAKING DANIELLE!!! 3. No I do not want to scroll down to see santa's "christmass package"! 4. And if I get one more racist joke on my phone I'm going to track down the numbers and stick screwdrivers through people's ears. What I propose!!! A popup blocker for cell phones! The way it works is if you get a text from anyone who isn't in your address book then the text is measured against a scale of stupidity and weighed against the screams of a small child to test annoyance. If the message fails these tests then the senders phone dissolves into Rabid Face-Attack Kittens with adamantine claws, followed by a large cloud of salt. Would anyone like to assist in the development if this ground breaking product?
  21. Dangit JM! You know I got alzheimeys... alshimmers... altoids... ooh pretty street sign... what were we talking about?
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