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Tinfoil espionage operatives


Zoom Rabbit

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Okay, here's a technical question right up our alley. :max:

 

I have a Nokia cell phone, which usually sits on the table right next to my AM radio. I have the recharger plugged in by the radio, so it's convenient to leave it there when I'm home, so I never have to go looking for it.

 

Right after I started doing this, I noticed that the radio would make a little staticky noise every once in a while...while it was turned off. :dozey: I've never heard a radio that's turned off make noise, but since it doesn't happen when the cell phone is gone, I blame the cell phone. I also get the noise when the radio is turned on, but it's much louder...and this happens right before my phone rings. My theory: interference from the phone (which is itself a microwave radio) causes the static, and it's powerful enough to cause a reaction in the radio even turned off. Curious.

 

It's the times that my phone doesn't ring, and this noise happens that I find odd. If the interference is caused by an incoming call...then what the hell is causing it when there isn't a call coming in? :confused: I have a number of possible explanations.

 

1. The cell phone is part of a network, and occasionally serves to relay information for other users on the satellite grid. This usually happens without our knowledge, unless it's sitting right next to a radio.

 

2. My rabble-rousing invective on the web and elsewhere has led to my being spied on by our government. The interference happens occasionally when secret agents turn on the microphone so they can hear what's going on in my house.

 

3. Aliens from Zeta Reticuli are telepathically beaming advanced space knowledge into my brain. Due to the intergalactic distances such messages travel, there's bound to be some signal leakage.

 

So what do you guys think? :max: I have several rolls of tinfoil that I can put up on the walls and ceiling, but I don't want to take such an extreme change of home decor unless it's necessary. What would Martha Stewart say...?

 

;)

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if there are any aliens i would say they are coming from phtoncxylon prime IX. i heard they have headache problems because of our microwaves. they cause a inteference in subspace which cause noises when they watch tv.

 

the solution is at hand: instead of your radio, turn your phone off.

 

of course, that is only what martha would say.. :max: *cough* :D

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Originally posted by Ernil

A.M. Radio still exists?

 

This is the problem summed up, here's how to fix it, throw out your radio and buy an F.M. one. Or better yet, a huge amp (preferably from the 80s for that vintage sound), a fine selection of speakers, and a cd player (none of those 300 cd changers though, how in the world are you supposed to find what your looking for? Also only 300? Where would I put the rest?)

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I took a clue from Archimedes and tried immersing the phone in a glass of water. The radio no longer makes the noise. Martha will be so happy.

 

I'm not sure what effect this has had on the phone, as I'm afraid to fish it out of the glass of water. I think it's angry at me...

 

When I dial my number now, I get Seaworld. :max: The folks at Seaworld are going to be very surprised to hear from my buddy Carlos when he gets back in town from his trip to Tijuana.

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Zooms post, the first one, you know, that one at the top

I have a number of possible explanations.

 

1. The cell phone is part of a network, and occasionally serves to relay information for other users on the satellite grid. This usually happens without our knowledge, unless it's sitting right next to a radio.

 

2. My rabble-rousing invective on the web and elsewhere has led to my being spied on by our government. The interference happens occasionally when secret agents turn on the microphone so they can hear what's going on in my house.

 

3. Aliens from Zeta Reticuli are telepathically beaming advanced space knowledge into my brain. Due to the intergalactic distances such messages travel, there's bound to be some signal leakage.

 

Well the first one's way to rational to ba happening to a person like you and the third ones just too lucky for a person like you. The best bet is scenario number two, it has a nice plot to it and in about thirty years time, we'll be watching the big screen adaptation of it with Steven Spielbergs son watching in the back wondering why he never got his fathers genes. Or good spelling ability, but at least he could blame one of them on a bad death Will and even worse stitching.

 

But yeah, best thing to do is find a good place to recharge your phone away from your AM radio (like next to the TV, no seriosuly, I do this and my TV works fine... the phone occassionally dials out for Pizza, but that's only to be expected...right?)

Or just move you AM radio, I suggest moving it to Bermuda. Get it some nice shorts (why am I 257.253% weirder when talking to Zoom? Why do I work out percentages to the exact decimal point? Why am I asking rhetorical questions when I know some silly bugger on this board (more likely than not, Zoom) is gonna be answering it anyway? Where did I leave my trousers?)

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i've got a similiar "problem"

 

i've got cable tv and the cable is connected to my tv-cards in my computer and whenever i watch tv and my sister (having the room next to me) gets a sms (i don't have a cell phone by myself, don't need one) there is this sound comming from the speakers...

(like: peep peep, peep peep :D)

 

strange is that these sounds sometimes also come when my sister doesn't get a sms (the phone is in her room though and it never happens when she is away with it)...

<paranoia>THE ALIENS ARE AFTER US!</paranoia>

 

or something...

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Originally posted by SkullHW™

I have ITC on my TV....:eek:

 

Nope, no matter how much I rearrange that sentance, it still doesn't make sense.

 

hang on, if I translate it into french, and then into spanish, and then turn it round three times and invert all of the vowels and consenents... nope, no hope, I just get an advertisement for high density toothbrushes.

 

edit

I just noticed the C is next to the V on the keyboard, did you mean ITV? and if so wellcome to the 32 billion of UK residents who also get ITV (not including Ian Hislop)

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the same thing happens to me.

 

1. The cell phone is part of a network, and occasionally serves to relay information for other users on the satellite grid. This usually happens without our knowledge, unless it's sitting right next to a radio.

 

i like that one

 

but there's no ninjas, i think ninjas come into it somehow.

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ITC = Intelligence Termination Control

 

I guess SkullHW™ Has a problem with the overall programming agenda of the world's television media, which seek to lessen the IQ potential of small children with rapid sequence editing designed to shorten the attention span and flashy graphics which might cause seizures.

 

:max: Um...folks, there's a reason why the teevee has an OFF switch. Don't be afraid to use it.

 

Siv: Martha Stewart is indeed my dog, play toy and trussed-up Barbie doll. :dozey: As for the bars, we find them handy attatchment points for afternoon bondage...

 

Also, ninjas are the ones responsible for the inclusion of cell phone transponder technology originally created in japanese computer labs so that future high-tech ninjitsu could use them to track down their unwitting round-eye victims. Banzai!

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Originally posted by Zoom Rabbit

ITC = Intelligence Termination Control

 

I guess SkullHW™ Has a problem with the overall programming agenda of the world's television media, which seek to lessen the IQ potential of small children with rapid sequence editing designed to shorten the attention span and flashy graphics which might cause seizures.

 

Magic, right, gotcha.

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there is this old man saying that alien ninjas are more likely ninja aliens. i mean. they are ninjas but they are aliens. and aliens are still a protected minority. man. mutant turtles arent even allowed to tough aliens or alien ninjas alias ninja aliens. they're only

mutants from earth.. and so a bigger minority than the aliens and even more ninja aliens. on the other hand mutant aliens are another alien minority. a smaller one. and i now lost my point so i'll stop here.

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Originally posted by Skinkie

I figured out what's wrong. Nazi's have tapped your cell phone for evil intent and the tap is messing with the radio. How I hate them. Or maybe it was gypsies, I don't trust them either.

 

Hey! That's politically incorrect and racist. Just because they're a minority group doesn't mean you have to hate them or look down on them, damn, Nazi's are people, just like us!

 

Oh, and did anyone else get what rayjones said? Take your time man! Joshi out (or does that sound too nerdy? Ni!)

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that is correct, zoom rabbit. you just revealed the secretly hidden message.

 

'To do is to be.' -- once you know

 

'To be is to do.' -- how to milk the cow

 

'Doobie doobie do.' -- you can stop the show

 

soon you can join me here at shady acres. :p

 

joshi.. it's not that i understand every of your posts.. ;) .. but what can i say.. nothing? :D

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Originally posted by Joshi

Hey! That's politically incorrect and racist. Just because they're a minority group doesn't mean you have to hate them or look down on them, damn, Nazi's are people, just like us!

 

This is the internet, I can hate anyone I want to. Ah freedom. Too bad those stupid Nazi's want to repress it. If they had their way, nobody on the internet would be allowed to hate, well, maybe hate jews. Stupid Nazis.

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