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Worst Pick Up Line?


Darth Groovy
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The purpose of this thread is to share your worst pick-up line. The thing that makes it unique, is that the pick up line actually had to work....seriously.

 

I'll start off.

 

At one point in my life I used to live in this slimey mudhole called Pekin, IL. It was a redneck town with a population of about 3,000. The only acceptible vehicles to drive were Mustangs and pick up trucks. Fortunate for me, I already had a pick up truck before moving to Mayberry Pekin.

 

Anyways, since nobody in that town can drive, I had two accidents. One was do to a very slippery street, where I was sandwiched by two good ole' boys at a stoplight. Another, was kind of embarasing....well I was looking at this hot girl in a parking lot, and failed to see that a thunderbird had stopped dead in front of me.

 

Anyways, the point of this is, that the grill fell off the front of my truck after the second accident. Since I was waiting on insurance to pay for the damage....in the meantime, I just drove around with the grill in the back of the truck. One time me and some of my hillbilly freinds were driving around in my truck, and I was actaully riding in the back for a change. We stopped at a red light, next to some really cute girls in a convertable. At that point I picked up the grill, held it up and say "Hey, do you girls want to grill some steaks?" The other girls had this look of anguish, yet one girl told us to pull over at the next light. We exchanged numbers, set up a date, and by the next afternoon we made love like rabbits. I was told by some friends of hers that she was the "hard-to-get" one when she was in High School.

 

How in the world did I pick up a girl with such a horrible line? :eek:

 

Please share your stories.

 

(disclaimer: this thread is designed for all sexes)

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I used this one as a joke once. I was in a bar with friends and noticed a girl sitting at the other end of a room with her friends. We both knew each other and joked around a lot so I decided to do it for fun.

 

I pointed my finger up and beckoned her to me with the old "finger fish hook" routine. When she came along I said to her: "I made you come with my finger, what do you think I could do with that?" pointing downwards.

 

We all laughed and then she sat down next to me and we started talking and laughing.

 

And hour later we ended up making out, so I guess it worked.

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Originally posted by Natty

I just get drunk and then announce to everyone that when I give a guy a blowjob I swallow.

 

...this forum starts to feel like good ol' irc (and like good not-so-ol' bash.org)...

 

...

 

care to come to braunschweig in germany? i'm practically always at home...

 

...

 

and then i see you're male, 60 years old and weight 250kg...

(or and fbi-agents...)

 

...

 

(talking about threads always becoming off-topics... :D)

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Originally posted by Natty

I just get drunk and then announce to everyone that when I give a guy a blowjob I swallow.

o man wtf is this sh*t, ewwwww

 

natty and anythin' remotely sex related in same sentence... ewwwwwwwwwwww

 

anywayz ma fost line woz 2 a nice girl.. not fat.. in a bar. i woz like "man shes gud" to my m8, and he told me 2 go 4 it.

 

SO i goz up to that bitch and used ma line.. "hey babe ah've shit me pants.. CAN I GET IN YOURS??".

 

o man she fell for it instantly an we hit it off well. l8r that nite we did a bit of fun and nvr saw her gain.

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Originally posted by YoshMeister

o man wtf is this sh*t, ewwwww

 

natty and anythin' remotely sex related in same sentence... ewwwwwwwwwwww

 

anywayz ma fost line woz 2 a nice girl.. not fat.. in a bar. i woz like "man shes gud" to my m8, and he told me 2 go 4 it.

 

SO i goz up to that bitch and used ma line.. "hey babe ah've shit me pants.. CAN I GET IN YOURS??".

 

o man she fell for it instantly an we hit it off well. l8r that nite we did a bit of fun and nvr saw her gain.

 

I'm scared of doing the grammar thing because I think spokes' o' pot will start shouting again, but whatever. Did it ever occur to you that this 'bitch' may be a guy?

 

Or stupid.

 

Either way, that line doesn't get girls, it gets psychopaths and fish.

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will start houting again

 

shouting.

 

did it ever occur to you that this 'bitch' may be a guy?

 

 

Did.

 

Either way, that line doesn't get girls, it get's

 

gets. No apostrophe. 'get's' means 'get is'.

 

psycopaths and fish.

 

psychopaths

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Originally posted by YoshMeister

o man wtf is this sh*t, ewwwww

 

natty and anythin' remotely sex related in same sentence... ewwwwwwwwwwww

 

anywayz ma fost line woz 2 a nice girl.. not fat.. in a bar. i woz like "man shes gud" to my m8, and he told me 2 go 4 it.

 

SO i goz up to that bitch and used ma line.. "hey babe ah've shit me pants.. CAN I GET IN YOURS??".

 

o man she fell for it instantly an we hit it off well. l8r that nite we did a bit of fun and nvr saw her gain.

 

worstpost.jpg

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Originally posted by Mort-Hog

shouting.

 

 

 

Did.

 

 

 

gets. No apostrophe. 'get's' means 'get is'.

 

 

 

psychopaths

 

Aww! That was uncalled for!

 

And Natty, smoking kills, alcohol doesn't (much, and don't no one come up with crappy statistics) and plus, getting drunk is just plain fun!

 

Smoking will give you lung cancer and heart failure, so kids, whatever you do, don't smoke, not unless you wanna look cool.

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- In the US in 1996, there were 110 640 alcohol-related deaths. That's a rate of 32.2 per 100 000.

 

- Every year, about 8 000 babies are born with fetal alcohol syndrome, a combination of physical and mental defects and is the most common cause of mental retardation.

 

- Drink driving causes 2500 accidents every year, about 270 of which are fatal.

 

- Approximately 1.4 million drivers were arrested in 2001 for driving under the influence of alcohol. This is an arrest rate of 1 for every 137 licensed drivers in the United States.

 

- 80% of cases of domestic abuse and battering involve alcohol abuse.

 

 

Or are those statistics too crappy for you?

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