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The light saber technical support line


Miracleasd

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Thank you for calling the Light saber technical support line. your call is important to us.

 

If you have a model x34-b with a faulty ignition switch please press 1 to speak to our legal department

 

If you have dropped your lightsaber in the bath please press 2 to speak to our aquatic reaserch team

 

If your lightsaber remote has run out of batteries please press 3 to speak to our spare parts department

 

If your crystal is giving off a pale shade of pink when it should be blue we are aware of the problem but press 4 to speak to ted who will speak to you in a condescending manor

 

If you have sliced yourself in two due to mishandling please press 6 so that we can have a good laugh about it

 

If you want to join the waiting list for the destroyer model please press 7 where you will be treated to the doorbell rendition of duel of the fates

 

If your blade lenght seems shorter that everyone elses please press 8 to speak to our saber envy group therapist

 

If you are unhappy with your purchase please press 9 to be cut off unexpectantly.

 

If you are wondering what happened to 5 it has been removed due to budget cuts. we apologise for any inconvinience.

 

Alternatively please hold to speak with andy. he wont be able to help you but it will be nice for him to talk to someone for a change.

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You comic genious you :D

 

 

Hello...my name is silent wolf....my wife doesnt even look at me anymore...she just stares at the glow of my lightsaber....she always comments on how big he is...and why cant i be more like him...its not that im jealous of that over bright prick.....or maybe i am? I dunno, its just *looks over at lightsaber*...WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT PUNK....i swear to god if you dont stop that!...*looks back at computer screen* ...i must go now.

 

 

*toliet flush*

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*beep beep bloop beeep bop beep bimp bop*

 

Hi.... My name is Tim Eeckle... And I can't maintain an erection. I'm fairly certain that my wife is sleeping with other men, because I came home once and found her sleeping with another man. And lately I've been thinking that I'm a woman trapped in a man's body. I CAN"T GET OUT!!!

 

oh... wait... is this 1-900-458-9800?

 

it's not... it's 1-800-458-9800.

 

oh... ok... in that case is can I speak to Andy?

 

Yes... I'll hold.

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