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A sensitive poem


Deric

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Finally! A place to post my MI poetry!

 

Well, actually, there is only one poem so far.

 

But if the response is positive, who knows?...there could be a sequel.

 

OOA OA AH

By SqueakyDeric

 

Oaooa ooh ah ah ah

oo-ooo oa oa oa

oa...oh ooo

ah ah oooa-ooh

ooa OO AHAHAH aa ooa oo ah!:D

 

 

It is a monkey limerick...I considered translating it but it's just not the same.

 

Any feedback is welcome, since I am entering it in a poetry competition soon.

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Did you mention it was a poem, or did you just start shouting it at people? Because I made the same mistake, and was banned from my local Co-op.

 

(I always recite my poetry in supermarkets...for some reason they have the most sympathetic listeners).

 

Of course, if you mispronounce ooa it becomes a swearword (in monkey). Maybe the bystanders spoke monkey and thought you were swearing at them.

 

Thank you for your kind comments...sadly I can only speak Rhesus at the moment but I am thinking of taking an Open Uni course in Orang-Utan.

 

I will tell you how the competition goes, but usually they are full of closed-minded people who insist the poem must rhyme, or at least by in a human language. Fascists:(

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I love the way you rhymed lines 1 2 and 5 as well as 3 and 4, pure genius. The rhythm was brilliant and the symbolism embodied in oo-ooo was pure awe inspiring.

The only drawback I'm afraid was your use of Oral sex in the last line, it may have been a tad bit unnessecary.

 

Oh, and I wrote a Monkey Island Haiku, tell me what you think.

 

OOk ook oo-ook ooa

oo oo lotus blossoms!

oo ooo oo oo ook

 

What do you think?

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Charming. I may steal part of it for my next poem.

 

Oh, and sorry about that last line, it was a typo. There should have been a '-' in there, changing it completely. It should have meant 'kinky'.

 

Sorry for inflicting such filth upon you. I know you expect better in these forums.

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