Deadmeat_X Posted January 25, 2002 Share Posted January 25, 2002 Well, I now HAVE TO make up the promise I made with my new sig, so... I'm gonna try to post the script of a random Monty Python-sketch every week, starting with one of my favourites: the Michelangelo-sketch...: Renaissance Choir: [Gregorian Chant] Servant (Graham Chapman): Michelangelo to see you, your Holiness. Pope (John Cleese): Who? Servant: Michelangelo, the famous renaissance artist whose best known works include the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, and the celebrated statue of David. Pope: Ah. Very well... Servant: In 1514 he returned to Florence and de... Pope: All right, that's enough, that's enough, they've got it now! Servant: Oh. Michelangelo (Eric Idle): Good evening, your Holiness. Pope: Evening, Michelangelo. I want to have a word with you about this painting of yours, "The Last Supper." Michelangelo: Oh, yeah? Pope: I'm not happy about it. Michelangelo: Oh, dear. It took me hours. Pope: Not happy at all. Michelangelo: Is it the jello you don't like? Pope: No. Michelangelo: Ah, no, I know, they do have a bit of colour, don't they? Oh, I know, you don't like the kangaroo? Pope: What kangaroo? Michelangelo: No problem, I'll paint him out. Pope: I never saw a kangaroo! Michelangelo: Uuh...he's right in the back. I'll paint him out! No sweat, I'll make him into a disciple. Pope: Aah. Michelangelo: All right? Pope: That's the problem. Michelangelo: What is? Pope: The disciples. Michelangelo: Are they too Jewish? I made Judas the most Jewish. Pope: No, it's just that there are twenty-eight of them. Michelangelo: Oh, well, another one will never matter, I'll make the kangaroo into another one. Pope: No, that's not the point. Michelangelo: All right. Well, I'll lose the kangaroo. Be honest, I wasn't perfectly happy with it. Pope: That's not the point. There are twenty-eight disciples! Michelangelo: Too many? Pope: Well, of course it's too many! Michelangelo: Yeah, I know that, but I wanted to give the impression of a real last supper. You know, not just any old last supper. Not like a last meal or a final snack. But you know, I wanted to give the impression of a real mother of a blow-out, you know? Pope: There were only twelve disciples at the last supper. Michelangelo: Well, maybe some of the others came along afterw... Pope: There were only twelve altogether. Michelangelo: Well, maybe some of their friends came by, you know? Pope: Look! There were just twelve disciples and our Lord at the last supper. The Bible clearly says so. Michelangelo: No friends? Pope: No friends. Michelangelo: Waiters? Pope: No. Michelangelo: Cabaret? Pope: No! Michelangelo: You see, I like them, they help to flesh out the scene, I could lose a few, you know I could... Pope: Look! There were only twelve disciples at... Michelangelo: I've got it! I've got it! We'll call it "The Last But One Supper"! Pope: What? Michelangelo: Well there must have been one, if there was a last one there must have been a one before that, so this, is the "Penultimate Supper"! The Bible doesn't say how many people were there, now does it? Pope: No, but... Michelangelo: Well there you are, then! Pope: Look! The last supper is a significant event in the life of our Lord, the penultimate supper was not! Even if they had a conjurer and a mariachi band. Now, a last supper I commissioned from you, and a last supper I want! With twelve disciples and one Christ! Michelangelo: One?! Pope: Yes one! Now will you please tell me what in God's name possessed you to paint this with three Christs in it? Michelangelo: It works, mate! Pope: Works? Michelangelo: Yeah! It looks great! The fat one balances the two skinny ones. Pope: There was only one Redeemer! Michelangelo: Ah, I know that, we all know that, what about a bit of artistic license? Pope: A one Messiah is what I want! Michelangelo: I'll tell you what you want, mate! You want a bloody photographer! That's you want. Not a bloody creative artist to crease you up... Pope: I'll tell you what I want! I want a last supper with one Christ, twelve disciples, no kangaroos, no trampoline acts, by Thursday lunch, or you don't get paid! Michelangelo: Bloody fascist! Pope: Look! I'm the bloody pope, I am! May not know much about art, but I know what I like! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guybrush122 Posted January 25, 2002 Share Posted January 25, 2002 um....er.... SPAM!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joshi Posted January 25, 2002 Share Posted January 25, 2002 next, monty python and the holy grail, fight scene with the black knight, that always cracks me up. of course if it has to be random, then probably not. but i loved that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeadEyeDave Posted January 25, 2002 Share Posted January 25, 2002 mmm, yeah...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Legolas T. Posted January 25, 2002 Share Posted January 25, 2002 You have to put on the one about the argument about that guys big nose! It is hillarious! Put it on please! It's in the life of brien! :D :D :D :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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