Alien Existence

[Joshi]

well, okay, but that doesn't make them more intelligent than us does it. think about it, they could just be advanced. we're not any more intelligent now, than man i century ago are we, we're just more advanced. this means, that if the idea is theer, then we could well be more intelligent than alien lifeforms that come to our planet.

[Darth Eggplant]

We Are Coming

We Are Legion

the Drowned God exists!

[Joshi]

yeah, so anyway, like i was saying, we can't be sure whether aliens would be hostile against us or not.

[Drunken_Sailor]

Some people claimed that "we can't say crap about aliens cause there aren't any, politely, grow up!"

 

How do they know there aren't any aliens? Because their Christian school says so?

 

LOL! That person was pretty positive in making that statement. LOL. IMHO that's just asking for it! Never say never, ESPECIALLY when it comes to our Universe! Heads up folks. We'll probably get a visitor for Christmas and it WON'T be Santa!

[Kjølen]

What makes you say that, Drunken Sailer?

[Feral]

I think we are more likely to see aliens than Snta at Christmas...check this out.

 

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each. Santa has about 31hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him to get back up the chimney into the sleigh and get onto the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second or 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer can pull 10 times, the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them - Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 540,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

A mass of nearly 600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would adsorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 miles/second in 1 milli-second, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrous considering all the high calorie snacks he must have consumed over the years) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.

 

Merry Christmas

[Joshi]

a priest recently said that as a joke in one of his sermons not realising that he would be upsetting many of the younger people in the church. apparently, he didn't know there were younger children in the audience.

 

but in the spirit of christmas, i will say that santa is able to do all of those things because of magic (which is basically the asnwer to any plot holes in fantasy stories).

[Kjølen]

Originally posted by Neil Joshi

also kjole, you never started this topic, or at least technically. Natty started a topic about Australians uniting for the bali bombing and it side tracked into this. rather than deleting all accused posts, feral simply split the thread.

 

Ahhh now I see, I remember posting this now, but I also remember posting the thread to, even though i didn't, i remember the fears of thread post like, its going to be spam, or epople will hate it, creeeeeeepy.

[Drunken_Sailor]

Ho, ho, ho.

[Aimee_lou_uk]

Originally posted by The Feral Chicken

I think we are more likely to see aliens than Snta at Christmas...check this out.

 

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each. Santa has about 31hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him to get back up the chimney into the sleigh and get onto the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second or 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer can pull 10 times, the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them - Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 540,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

A mass of nearly 600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would adsorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 miles/second in 1 milli-second, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrous considering all the high calorie snacks he must have consumed over the years) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.

 

Merry Christmas

 

You forgot about the ammount santa would weigh after eating a mince pie after every house!

*tuts*

[Drunken_Sailor]

Originally posted by The Feral Chicken

I think we are more likely to see aliens than Snta at Christmas...check this out.

 

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each. Santa has about 31hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him to get back up the chimney into the sleigh and get onto the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second or 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer can pull 10 times, the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them - Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 540,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

A mass of nearly 600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would adsorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 miles/second in 1 milli-second, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrous considering all the high calorie snacks he must have consumed over the years) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.

 

Merry Christmas

 

Lol, where did you find this article?? It gives a good laugh!

 

Originally posted by Neil Joshi

A priest recently said that as a joke in one of his sermonies, not realising that he would be upsetting many of the younger people in the church. Apparently, he didn't know there were younger children in the audience.

 

But in the spirit of Christmas, I will say that Santa is able to do all of those things because of magic (which is basically the answer to any plot holes in fantasy stories).

 

I think the whole myth of Santa Clause should be done away with once and for all. What purpose does it serve, really? Just makes children greedy to get presents, and disaffects them when they get older. BAH, HUMBUG!

[Joshi]

your got coal when you were a kid at christmas didn't you?

i think the whole idea of sanata isn't to make children greedy, but you give them hope in all things god. children will at a young at need role models to look up to which they just can't get at home. a happy good giving man is the kind of person we would all like to be, despite the fact that we aren't. it would be nice if our children were like that wouldn't it?

 

also, it's faith. you may not believe in it, but i do. i never believed in santa when i was a child. i told myself i was, every christmas, i'd put a mince pie and sherry and carrots on the table for santa. every christmas morning, i walk dowstairs, see the bits taken out and half the sherry gone, and i'd know it was my dad, but it still felt special somehow. i don't know how, it just did. it's a feeling children get when they know something magical had happened in their house.

 

it's what's called christmas spirit. i am not christian, i do not believe in jesus and do not to an extent believ in christmas, but i do believe in christmas spirit, because that is something that has nothnig to do with religeon, it's to do with bringing the best out in people and making everyone feel happy. sure, we can't make evryone happy, but even at work today, athiests are wearing santa hats or hair bands with red antlers on, they don't care about it being the month in which jesus was born, they just want to have fun at a joyus time. that's christmas spirit. If santa brings us anything this year, whether he exists or not, it will be christmas spirit. a noble spirit embiggens the smallest man.

[Drunken_Sailor]

Au contraire, I always got good stuff. I am all for the TRUE Christmas spirit, but today it seems that that is forgotten in the comercialization of the whole holiday, starting in October, or even

September in some cases.

 

So I contend that it basically appeals to greed and the religious aspect has been almost fogotten.

[Joshi]

Almost, but not completely. i think we can both agree to disagree here, christmas, easter, mothers day, (i'm not sure about thanksgiving, we don't celebrate it here, but i'm under the impression that it's basically true to what it's always been, have turkey and be thankful, correct me if i'm wrong) and fathers day was invented by comerciallists (sp?). but i think we can both agree that there is some christmas spirit here that we need to hold onto.

 

if your still wanting to get rid of father christmas, then so beit, but this should make you happy (and make a lot of peoplr laugh)

 

Scroll Down

 

ll

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V

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hee hee hee.

[Feral]

Originally posted by Neil Joshi

christmas, easter, mothers day, (i'm not sure about thanksgiving, we don't celebrate it here, but i'm under the impression that it's basically true to what it's always been, have turkey and be thankful, correct me if i'm wrong) and fathers day was invented by comerciallists (sp?)

 

Actually, out of your entire list, only Mother's & Father's day were created by commerciallists. Christmas and Easter are both Christian festivals that have been celebrated for the last two millenia. However, the chocolate eggs only came into easter about 200 years ago, and Christmas only became a huge event commericially as little as 50 years ago (my dad, who is 60, still remembers when all you asked for for Christmas was an orange).

An interesting sidenote you've probably heard before: a hundred years ago, Santa was merely the chief elf, not a jolly fat man in red and white. He only got this image after Coca-Cola dressed him in their colours and gave him the image that we now and love today.

[Joshi]

no sorry, i wrote that wrong, there was meant to be some kind of comma there, i was only referring to fathers day when saying it was created by commerciallists. which is true, mothers day was actually a day for children to be thankful to their mothers long ago. then america thought it needed more money and came up with fathers day to even things out.

but i knew about easter and christmas, i may not be christian, but i know the story's (in a christian school with 99.99% christian children, it kinda gets forced upon you)

 

and yes, i did know about santa and how he wasn't really that big until commerciallists came along and spruced him up for their purposes. sad really.

 

now talking directly to feral and anyone else who may be interested but very few of you would understand (no point in PM, it's here right now and is relevent to the topic). but feral, if you remember the discworld novel 'Hogfather' the hogfather was originally a winter god associated with pig-killing that is custmary to country districts. according to ancient myth, the hogfather spends the year in his secret place of giant pig bones, emerging on hogswatch-night to gallop from house to house on a crude sledge draw by four tusked wild boars to deliver presents of sausages, black pudding, pork scratches and ham to all all the children who have been good. children who have been bad get a bag full of bloody bones (it's these little details that tell you it's a tale for children) there is a song about him starting "You'd better watch out..."

 

he evolved into the kinder version throught the belief of the children and is now as we see him, a jolly fat man who rides his sleigh drawn by four pigs to each house to give presents or coal to good or bad children. something close to our father christmas.

[Feral]

True, but our Santa doesn't have tusks.

The Hogfather got his reputation for being kindly when a local king was riding out one night and he heard three women crying that they had no food for the midwinter's feast. Taking pity, he threw a packet of sausages through the window - badly concussing one of them, but there's no point in spoiling a good legend. His pigs are called Gouger, Rooter, Tusker and SNouter. Theya re not your average cuddly piggies.

Right, Neil, I think it's time to put our Discworld Companions away now...

[Joshi]

you lifted just as much as i did!

[Feral]

That why I said "our" instead of your Honest, I did mean it as plural.

[Aimee_lou_uk]

Originally posted by The Feral Chicken

 

 

An interesting sidenote you've probably heard before: a hundred years ago, Santa was merely the chief elf, not a jolly fat man in red and white. He only got this image after Coca-Cola dressed him in their colours and gave him the image that we now and love today.

 

i told my A2 english language class dat, n they didnt believeme that santa used to be green till cocacola changed him! probably explains him being "chief elf"as elves are associated with little green outfits, especially around christmas!

[Joshi]

anyone remember Santa clause the movie, with Dudly Moore (sorry, it was on like three hours ago, i didn't watch it, but it made me remember it). when he first became santa, the elves made him a big green suite to wear exactly the same as the santa suit except green of course. Mrs Clause said it wasn't his colour and thought red would be better. this isn't the same, but similar and the filmakers may have touched on that when doing the film.

 

just thinking about that movie now, i might as well add this in.

Rest In peace Dudley Moore.

 

but no with teh christmas cheer, it's 23:52 here at GMT, 8 Mins and it's Christmas time.

[Drunken_Sailor]

OK. Thanks.

 

Originally posted by The Feral Chicken

I think we are more likely to see aliens than Snta at Christmas...check this out.

 

There are approximately two billion children (persons under 18) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist (except maybe in Japan) religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the population reference bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming there is at least one good child in each. Santa has about 31hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stocking, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him to get back up the chimney into the sleigh and get onto the next house.

Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second or 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized LEGO set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer can pull 10 times, the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them - Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 540,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

A mass of nearly 600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would adsorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.

Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 miles/second in 1 milli-second, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,000 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrous considering all the high calorie snacks he must have consumed over the years) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo. Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.

 

Merry Christmas

 

You can also find this at physlink.com. Click on FUN upper right (Physics and Astronomy fun - jokes and cartoons all over the place!) Scroll down to Is there a Santa? or How physicists can take the fun out of Christmas (from SPY Magazine - January 1990) physlink.com's FUN section is full of laughs. Check it out.

 

I'm going to open a new topic called SIGNS. Be my guest, Sam. I don't see why you disliked this movie UNLESS you missed that Tweed scene.

 

Really. She is trivial. How about crop signs? Better than Spearses and Tweedserses. What would YOU do? Turn to Mariah? Roflmao.

[SuicidalXWing]

Is Santa an alien? Think about it. Aliens supposedly have spacecraft that can accelerate to extreme speeds and make complete stops in the blink of an eye.

 

Wouldn't that coincide with the whole Santa delivering to certain houses?

 

Also, in Japan Santa is called Annual gift man and he lives on the moon. Therefore they have Santa, despite being a mostly Buddhist country, or whatever religion is their top religion now.

[Joshi]

so now your saying that a beloved gift bringer that many children know and love is a hideous space monster. and also, you lifted that 'annual gift man' thing from the simpsons.

[SuicidalXWing]

What's your point? Besides, I did see a Japanese movie where Santa lived on the moon. So there is multiple evidence of it. Are you saying Simpsons is bad? Cause if you are.

 

*waves fist*