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Why did the blonde tiptoe past the medecine cabinet?

 

Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills

 

 

 

Okay this blonde goes to the doctor. "Doctor," She complains, "I hurt all over."

"Could you be a little more specific?" The Doctor asks.

"Oh sure." Says the Blonde. "Wherever I touch myself it hurts."

The Doctor looks grim and then examines her. After a few hums and frowns he stands back and clears his throat.

"I'm afraid it's quite clear what we have here" He says grimly.

"Oh, what, Doctor?"

"You've got a broken finger."

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there are three girls being chased by the police-one redhead, one brunette, and one blonde. they run into a back alley and have to hide. so the redhead goes into a dumpster, the brunette a trashcan, and the blonde an empty potato sack. so the police go to check and see where they are. one hits the dunpster, so the redhead goes "woof!", another hits the trashcan and the brunette says, "meow!". then another kicks the potato sack and the blonde goes, "potato!"

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lol.

 

During late spring one year, a blonde was trying out her new boat. She was unable to have her boat perform, travel through water, or do any maneuvers whatsoever no matter how hard she tried.

 

After trying for over three days to make it work properly, she decided to seek help. She putted the boat over to the local marina in hopes that someone there could identify her problem.

 

Workers determined that everything from the engine to the outdrive was working perfectly on the topside of the boat. So, a puzzled marina employee jumped into the water to check underneath the boat for problems. Because he was laughing so hard, he came up choking on water and gasping for air. Under the boat, still strapped in place securely, was the trailer.

 

-pHILBRUSH :D

 

 

:D :D :D

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Three blonde women were stranded on an island and couldn't get off. One of them kicked a bottle and a genie appeared.

'I will grant you one wish each' it said, so the first blonde said

'I wish I was 25% smarter so I could get off this island.' Suddenly, the blonde turned into a red head, jumped into the sea and swam to the not too distant shore. The second blonde said,

'I wish I was 50% smarter so I could get off this island.' She then turned into a brunette, made a raft out of palm trees and paddled to shore.

Finally, the third blonde said 'I wish I was 100% smarter so I could get off of this island.' She turned into a man and walked off the island across the bridge.

 

And here's one for the men, but women can read it as well.

 

The perfect man and perfect woman were driving in a car when suddenly they came across a man on the road, stranded. Being as perfect as they were, they picked him up and gave him a ride, only to find out that he was Santa Clause. But as excited as they were, five minutes later, they crashed the car into a ditch and only one of them survived, which one survived?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The perfect woman, because there's no such things as Santa Clause or a perfect man.

 

Now to all of the women out there, this is the end of the joke, do not scroll down and read the rest, too all the men, there's more, scroll on down.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well, if there is no such thing as the perfect man or santa clause, then the perfect woman was driving, explaining why they crashed.

 

And to any women out there who are reading this you have just proved womens incompotence in following simple orders. :p

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Dude, that wasn't funny at all, I thought we were posting jokes, that wasn't a funy joke, it was more of a statement. And why are you grinning at me like that, what do you think i'm funny? I don't think so, why are you grinning at me. So what's with the axe? What you gonna chop something? Why you got the axe? There's no wood here, I totally don't get the axe... oh.:eek:

 

**cough**

 

So, has anyone got anything for a bad back, oh thanks, yeah that's great, now, if it's not too much trouble, could you rub it on my back, it's over there with the rest of my body... :D

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uh, you tried yufster's medicine pill things that she has in her hand? oh, wait, she just smashed it in half. Hey, Neil, she's ginning at you again, I think she likes you!

 

 

 

 

*slice!* *CHOP* STAB* "AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

 

 

 

 

Oh.

 

 

 

-pHILBRUSH

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