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How to change the Earth's orbit? JUMP!


Dagobahn Eagle

Right, so... 600 million people jumping will save us from global warming.  

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  1. 1. Right, so... 600 million people jumping will save us from global warming.



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Well done you foo's who jumped. Now that you've sped us enought, we're gonna either go further into space 'till we're all blocks of ice or towards the sun, which means we'll be buning up soon. Well done! *shakes every jumpers' hand*

 

>_>

<_<

 

Yeah, jump wasn't even worth a steaming pile of crap. Well, at least some nerds got excercise.

"Mom! Help me up from my chair! I gotta make a difference... And bring a gallon of coke and a couple of pizzas with you!"

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I post it again.

 

http://qntm.org/moving

 

It would be like having an ant jump on a cruiseliner and expecting it to hit the bottom of the ocean. It's impossible.

 

#

 

Getting everybody in the world to jump at the same time.

 

Okay, folks, let's look at this. Suppose everybody on the planet weighed 100kg (which is an overestimate, 70kg is more like it, probably less). Suppose that there were ten billion people (another overestimate - there are about 6.4 billion at the time of writing). Suppose that they all jumped ten metres in the air (a huge overestimate, fifty centimetres is more likely and probably much less). Suppose they were all at the exact same point on Earth (which they won't be, thus mitigating the effects of the jump). And lastly, suppose that they all jumped at precisely the same instant, which of course they will not, seeing as the time difference between the fastest watch and the slowest will likely be over five minutes.

 

Altogether that's a mass of one billion tonnes of humanity jumping ten metres in the air.

 

The Earth has a mass of... let's be nice and round it WAY down to 10^21 tonnes. That's a trillion times heavier than all of humanity. Which means the distance the Earth moves when everybody jumps will be one trillionth of the distance that all the people jumped: that is to say, 10-11 metres, or about half the radius of a hydrogen atom.

 

It gets better. Even assuming the Earth did move by some significant distance when everybody jumped, just think about it: it'd move right back again! You jump up, the Earth goes down: you fall down, the Earth comes up to meet you. Jumping up and down to try to move the Earth is like mounting a fan on a sailboat, pointing the fan at the sail, and expecting the boat to move forwards. It just doesn't work!

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Not going to work. I wish it was that easy, but it isn't.

 

Now let's have a psychic session: What's the WJD team going to do?

 

  1. Leave the page as it is ("calculations will be done in a few days").
  2. Admit to being morons.
  3. Forge calculations and start preparing for a "WJD 2".

 

They can say whatever they want, there's no way they had that many people.

 

In related news, I have 34 toes, and one is made of candy corn. And anime

And I'm dating Chihiro. She's just 10, but that's OK, I'm only 9.
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wtf? there are people on all sides of the earth and if they all jumped nothing would happen. and even if everyone did jump in one place, it wouldnt move the earth, theres not enough force. hell, meteorites and comets and asteroids hit the earth and the earth doesnt move. howstupid can someone get? its all a load of bull****.

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But then again, "it's just a jump". The worst thing that happens is that you jumped, which isn't much of an effort. The best thing that happens (in your eyes, if you don't know that your efforts are worthless) is that you save the Earth from global warming.

 

I didn't jump, I wouldn't if given a second chance, and I know this is idiotic. I'm just sayin'.

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I noticed something. How the hell did they get 600 million people to sign up? That's a tenth of the planet. I guess that there isn't that much more people who have access to the internet. I would guess that 600 million would be like if every single person who had access would have gone to that site and signed up. Really retarded in my opinion.

 

I bet they're going to lie about "calculations" like how they lied about the number of people signed up. I would guess that maybe 10 million tops signed up, and less than a percent actually jumped and most likely jumped at the wrong moment.

 

Edit:

 

This hoax has been put forth in the "media" before, as an item in the Weekly World News in 1993, according to this link http://www.subgenius.com/subg-digest/v4/0069.html.

 

The counter for the site, measuring registered jumpers, was also inaccurate. The number of registered jumpers would go both up and down. For a point of reference, at 21:37 on 18th July 2006, it was at 598,196,296 but just 15 minutes later it had dropped to around 598,106,000. [3] Less than 12 hours before the event the site's counter read that there were 600,256,820 registered jumpers, over 50% of all internet users

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Jump_Day

 

Anyone follow Eon8? Same thing but less weird.

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