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[Illustrated FIC] Butrus IV

Ambrose

By Ambrose
in Coruscant Entertainment Centre

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Ambrose Newbie

Ambrose

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((A Galactic Civil War era fic with accompanying screenshots I took in SWBF2. Feedback welcome, enjoy!))

 

titlerb1.jpg

 

Part I

 

Sergeant Brak Lietem, VN-961, 2nd Section, 3rd platoon, beta company, 24th Corulag Regulars, Imperial Army, reclined stiffly against the wall of the trench.

 

The rain of Butrus IV hadn't let up since the landing. The bottom of the trench was sopping, of course, and everything around him was covered in grit- his E-11, armor, even his squadmates.

 

Lietem shifted uncomfortably and glanced at the chronometer which appeared on his helmet readout. They had been sitting in this pit for about an hour. That's all that it was, really- a pit. Butrus IV had been subjected to heavy bombardment by the Republic Armada during the Clone Wars. The dead city which the 24th Corulag was huddled in now was ridden with such pits... many of them filled with ghastly reminders of the planet's death. Lietem had taken care to dispose of these before he ordered his squad in.

 

trenchsmallco7.png

 

It was daytime, according to Lietem's chronometer, but there was no sun to be seen. Looking at the sky, all he could see was an eerily dark and radioactive green cloud cover, which would sometimes be lit up by bolts of lightning- or bolts of plasma from the battle above in orbit.

 

The Sergeant cursed into his squad comlink, elicting some appreciative laughs from his section. Command had ordered long-range comlink silence, which essentially cut off 2nd section from orders, not to mention the ability to call for support. The squad was glad to see that their sergeant was as frustrated about this as they were.

 

After a few more moments, Lietem decided to chance a peek over the edge of the trench. Motioning his intention to the squad, he grabbed a scoped sniper rifle from Private Donten, LY-341, and inched his head upward, wiping the scope clear of grit before putting it next to his helmet's eyepiece.

 

Nothing had changed. The rebels had dug in about 200 meters away and formed a trench line about the same distance across. He looked to his right. 3rd and 4th sections had done just as his section did, and looked similarly lethargic and frustrated at the lack of orders. 1st and 5th sections were nowhere to be found, and Lt. Nokar hadn't been in touch since the comm silence order. Blaster fire was visible in the distance, and the silhouettes of AT-STs could be seen in brief flashes, but it was all so far off... All that was left for 2nd - 4th sections was to sit and listen to the sounds of battle and the downpour of rain.

 

"This is blasted ridiculous," he muttered into his squad comlink as he crawled back into the pit and tossed the rifle back to its owner. Mutters of agreement flooded the channel.

 

"I'm contacting Sergeant Varge from 3rd section... they're about 30 meters to our right, maybe they've heard something from command..."

 

After adjusting the comm channel, Lietem addressed Varge on a private comm. "Yo Varge. Heard anything?"

 

After a brief pause followed by static, Varge's gruff voice came in reply. "Not a thing Brak. These damn Rebs are just sitting in their ditch down yonder, don't know what they're waiting for though. There's at least four dozen of them, you'd think they'd have charged us by now given that they outnumber us 2 to 1..."

 

"They probably think we have more. It's not common for our platoon to be as split up as it is."

 

"Aye... which is what worries me. They must be waiting for reinforcements."

 

At this the sergeant nervously looked over the edge of his trench again, and, seeing it as it was, sighed.

 

"Well there's nothing we can do but wait."

 

"Aye soldier. Sergeant Varge, out."

 

Lietem shook his head and then let it fall against the wall of the pit. He gazed at the green-covered sky. Laser bolts and lightning strikes streaked across it, weaving eerie patterns into the already eerie corpse of a planet. He closed his eyes... nothing... to do... but wait...

 

"SERGEANT!" KEEEEEEEEROOM!

 

An explosion shook the trench, and Lietem sprang from his reverie. Instantly assessing the situation whilst simultaneously searching for his blaster, his insides froze as he saw a Rebel armored speeder some distance off.

 

"How the hell did we let that damn speeder get so goddam close?!" he barked. The men around him scrambled to their weapons at the reprimand of their section leader. "Who was the son of a wampa on watch?" No one answered as they hastily and nervously took defensive positions under their sergeant's eye. Lietem smiled behind his helmet. This was how he liked his squad best; under pressure and in action.

 

"Pick your targets and fire!"

 

The shapes of dozens of rebel troopers were emerging from the haze in the distance, and Lietem's section opened up. Looking to his right, Lietem noted with a somewhat vain satisfaction that Varge's troops were still scrambling to get into position. "Varge, you with me?"

 

"Aye Brak, you're in command. Third section at your service."

 

"Hold fast, focus firepower on that blasted speeder. Doron?"

 

Sergeant Doron of 4th section squeaked a response.

 

Now shouting into his comlink above the din of battle, Lietem gave his orders, "Doron, your boys and mine are going to focus on the advancing troops, ignore the speeder. 2nd and 4th are going to cut the infantry to pieces from both sides whilst our heavy support comes from Varge in the center, aye?"

 

Both sergeants concurred, and Lietem opened up with his E-11.

 

"Watch that turret!"

 

The mounted particle cannon on the speeder turned toward Doron's 4th section.

 

"Cover Doron!"

 

"Sir?"

 

"TAKE COVER DAMMIT!"

 

Too late. The particle cannon let loose, and screams from the far right of 2nd section's position confirmed the mauling of 4th section. Bodies went flying from the shock, and debris joined the rain in pouring down on Lietem's men. Doron let out a final yelp over the comlink before static overtook the channel.

 

flydieto9.png

 

Lietem cursed to no one in particular and took aim, noting his kills through the drizzle with pleasure.

 

(To be continued...)

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Ambrose Newbie

Ambrose

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Nice start, and im definitely looking forward to the next part!

 

Btw, what happened to your other fic? did you ever end up finishing it?

 

To make a very long story short, school came along with a vengeance and I didn't visit these forums for a few months... Right now it's buried somewhere in this forum, maybe I'll finish it later, but at the present I'm working soley on this one :)

 

And thanks for the feedback from all three of you :D

 

edit-

 

and I'm considering editing the first part, this paragraph specifically:

 

Lietem shook his head and then let it fall against the wall of the pit. He gazed at the green-covered sky. Laser bolts and lightning strikes streaked across it, weaving eerie patterns into the already eerie corpse of a planet. He closed his eyes... nothing... to do... but wait...

 

to include something about a woman in his life, sorta to bring the stormtroopers out of the realm of mindless servants and into that of REAL people. But I don't know if that would spoil the story or add to it.

 

So what's your opinion? Add emotion to stormtroopers or keep them as hard, cold killing machines? Both work for me, I just want to do whichever one will make the fic the best :)

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Ambrose Newbie

Ambrose

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Thanks Pottsie, it's good to be back. :)

 

Ok, I've written a revision of the above paragraph, it's up to y'all whether it should be implemented or not.

 

here's the original:

 

Lietem shook his head and then let it fall against the wall of the pit. He gazed at the green-covered sky. Laser bolts and lightning strikes streaked across it, weaving eerie patterns into the already eerie corpse of a planet. He closed his eyes... nothing... to do... but wait...

 

And here's what I propose to revise it to.

 

Lietem shook his head and then let it fall against the wall of the pit. He gazed at the green-covered sky. Laser bolts and lightning strikes streaked across it, weaving eerie patterns into the already eerie corpse of a planet. Somewhere up there... through the haze...

 

Taking care to make sure none of his squadmates were looking at him, Lietem carefully pulled a weather-worn picture from between his right leg and shinplate, and sighed. Despite his best efforts to protect it, the rain had managed to seep down there as well. Smiling a soft smile behind his helmet which no man would ever see, he looked at it through his lens-filters, covering it from the rain with his free hand. Natylia was home on Corulag. Safe and warm and dry. Lietem's young innards writhed in longing as he imagined some pristine, green new cadet just graduating from the adademy strutting his shiny new officer's bars before her. At this thought his face turned red and he quickly replaced the picture to its safe spot behind his shin plate and pounded the wall of the trench with such conviction that his men all silenced their conversations in alarm. Chuckling a bit at his own passions, Lietem closed his eyes... nothing... to do... but wait...

 

Alrighty, now that you've read them both, I need feedback on which one is best for this particular story. :D

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Ambrose Newbie

Ambrose

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((with changes to that one paragraph pending, I'll continue into Part II))

 

Part II

 

"Squad, cover!"

 

The turret was rotating slowly as the Rebel infantry continued their merciless advance.

 

"Incoming!"

 

"Take cover NOW!" Lietem yelled to his squad above the din of battle. "Varge, can't your boys hit that damn thing?"

 

"We have Brak, the armor's too thick for small arms. We've been pounding-"

 

Varge was interrupted as the particle cannon unleashed a blast once more, this time at Lietem's squad. The sergeant held onto his helmet and huddled against the wall of the pit as debris and shrapnel went flying.

 

"AHH!"

 

On Lietem's right Private Coper, YU-843 screamed in agony. A piece of metal sent flying by the particle cannon had lodged itself into the part of his arm not covered by the protective armor. Blood mingled with the water at the bottom of the pit as Coper clutched his wound. Squad medic Corporal Kendol crawled over to the wounded trooper, and after a few brief words of encouragement Lietem returned to his position and let loose a hail of blaster fire on the advancing Rebels.

 

"We've got to stop that blasted speeder. Varge?"

 

"Aye?"

 

"I can't see the thing clearly through the smoke, what the hell is it?

 

"Light skimmer, turreted particle cannon, twin light blasters, open topped, modified engines by the looks-"

 

"Perfect. Donten!"

 

The squad's sniper squeezed off a final shot at the Rebel infantry before scurrying down the trench line at his sergeant's call.

 

"Sir!"

 

Lietem indicated a position about fifteen meters up and to the right of the squad's position. "I want you to get up there, take cover behind that rubble, and pick off the pilots of that tank, 3rd section reports it's open topped, but we can't get a clear shot from here because of this blasted smoke."

 

"Yes sir."

 

"Go on my mark. Squad! At my command lay covering fire on the right flank!"

 

A unanimous "yes sir" greeted Lietem's ears.

 

"NOW! Lay down that suppresive fire. Donten, MOVE!"

 

"Sir!"

 

The sniper deftly hopped over the edge of the trench line, his marksman's cape flapping in the wind. Blaster bolts laced the battlefield as 2nd section forced the Rebels to take cover and keep their heads down.

 

Over the comlink Lietem said, "Donten you with us?"

 

"Aye sir, in position."

 

sniper1hv9.png

 

"Fire at will private."

 

"For the empire, sir!"

 

Donten's silenced shot couldn't be heard over the noise of battle, but a lance of green light lit through the smoke ahead, soon followed by a second.

 

snxj7.png

 

"Pilot and copilot eliminated, sir."

 

"Very good private... very good."

 

But Lietem knew the worst was yet to come.

 

To be continued...

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Ambrose Newbie

Ambrose

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May I ask that the screenshots are from Battlefronts? They seems very realistic.

 

Yep, they are indeed from battlefront. i'm actually suprised how well they turned out too (especially the AT-ST on the title pic & in my sig O.o), my computer sucks so I have everything on the lowest graphics settings. Odd.

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Ambrose Newbie

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It looks like the level has been modded, since I don't remember playing that level on either Battlefront or Battlefront II.

 

yep, link to the map in the 2nd post. It's an amazing map, could have shipped with the game IMO. I guess there are some very talented modders out there.

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