Grifter's Rant #1

[Grifter_Grifts]

Just wondering... While living in this crazy electronic age, did anyone else resent the stupid internet lingo that was emerging, and swear never to adopt it? I remember seeing "LOL" everywhere, and totally despising it... Honestly, it made my stomach turn to see that immature "teeny-bopper" language being born. I hated instant messaging like MSN and ICQ, because of being swamped by LOL OMG TTYL ROFL.

 

I still hate it, but use SOME of it now, because it's just easier to go with the flow. I see alot more has been added to this "shorthand" over the years, and I've noticed something: It can save you time when typing, but when used excessively, it takes twice as long for the person on the other end to decipher. For me at least, it takes alot longer to read the condensed version. It's kind of inefficient in it's efficiency. It defeats the purpose, I think, because it's too choppy and intermittent. Proper writing flows... One word blends into the next, so you don't come screeching to a halt all the time. It's beautiful! It may contain more characters, but you don't read LETTERS. You read WORDS! Try and look at a word and only read one letter of it. It's impossible! It takes the same amount of time to read BF as it does to read Boyfriend. Look at this word, but don't read it: Carrot. It can't be done...

 

Maybe I'm just old fashioned and unable to grasp the supposed advantage behind the concept. People on Myspace are constantly leaving me messages composed entirely of internet slang, and it's frustrating. It has frustrated me to the brink of insanity, and now I have to vent to you fine people. (Sorry!) Here, read these two identical sentences and see which one is faster to get through:

 

"YEA I H8 TRYIN TA READ STUF WEN SUM PPL INSIST ON RITIN LIKE DIS ALL DA TIME ITS EVEN WURS WEN NOBODY EVR USES NE PUNCTUATION BCUZ IT MAKS IT SO HARD 4 ME 2 TEL WHN THY R DUN RITIN A SENTENCE N STARTN A NEW 1 IT SO DUM WEN PPL JUS USE CAPS 2 IT SUX TRYIN TA READ NE THIN PPLY"

 

"Yeah, I hate trying to read stuff when some people insist on writing like this all the time. It's even worse when nobody ever uses any punctuation, because it makes it so hard for me to tell when they are done writing a sentence, and starting a new one. It's so dumb when people just use capitals, too. It sucks trying to read anything properly."

 

Hey, I just noticed something... Both lines take up roughly the same amount of screen space! Since we don't read letters, but rather words, the only advantage to shortening words would be if it took up less screen space for our eyes to cover... But it doesn't! So, our eyes go through the same amount of movement to accomplish the same task. No time is saved at all. I guess you could use all lower case letters to save space, but the fact remains: You practically have to learn a second language in order to read with any speed. Personally, I don't feel like wasting space in my brain to learn my own language for a second time.

 

I suppose there is no problem with typing "lol" or "ttyl" as long as you know how to spell "laugh out loud" and "talk to you later". I understand the theory behind the whole thing, but honestly think there is a useful limit. Once that limit is crossed, it's more of a fad, than anything else... And I hate those!

 

Ok, I'll stop. I originally typed alot more than this, but cut out a few of the last paragraphs because I was getting off the topic of internet slang, and onto spelling, and the "education" system. I tend to scare people away with colossal posts! I can't really blame them for not wanting to waste valuable time reading gibberish that, in a cosmic sense, is about as important as Paris Hilton's sex life, lol. (Grrr.... I used it!)

 

If any form of discussion starts up here, I'll add more.

[VampireNaomi]

I pretty much agree with you. I can take netspeak or whatever that's called in chatrooms, MSN etc. but if I see someone constantly using it (even lol) on forums or, dear Lord, essays or stories, my first impression of that person won't be very positive. Even if they actually have something intelligent to say, I will be too busy frowning at their use of language to notice.

 

I take language very seriously in general, and netspeak is just the tip of the iceberg for me. I am disgusted by how people think it's apparently okay to abandon grammar, punctuation, and common sense just "cuz its just teh internetz, lol!!!!"

 

Another reason I dislike netspeak is that I can't read it. I had no idea what "ttyl" was before this post and I've been entirely ignorant about that "WTFBBQ" thing I see everywhere. What the heck is that anyway?

[Grifter_Grifts]

Well, I've never heard of "WTFBBQ" before, and decided to Google the crap out of it... I still have no idea. Wow, when Google fails, there is no hope!

 

I understand the definition of it to be "A response to something unknown or confusing" but have yet to understand what it actually stands for. I know "WTF" means something I shouldn't type here, and "BBQ" is barbecue, but together they are a mystery to me! Maybe it is just one of those mysterious internet things like "All your base are belong to us!" that just took off for no apparent reason, other than our natural instinct to fall in love with strange things. (I must admit: I own a shirt with that phrase printed on it!)

 

The written language is strange, and wonderful. I love it, but there is a "mistake" (It's actually intentional, even though I know it is wrong) that I make constantly... That is, my use of capitalization after typing ellipsis dots. I know it's not correct to use in every instance, but something about doing it seems to put more emphasis on the pause... And that's the point! (See, it works!) Besides, not many people know it's wrong, so it's easy to get away with. I also use too many brackets, if you haven't noticed. Lol, I'm such a hypocrite! I guess I have a certain margin for error that I find acceptable. Some people write things to be read, while others write things to be heard, similar to natural speech. I think a mix of both is the most effective, even if it's not perfectly correct. I would say my biggest flaw of all when writing is that I tend to come across as arrogant. It can be so hard to convey the proper tone in writing. Sometimes I read things after writing them, and think "Wow, I sound like a jerk!" But I am probably one of the easiest people on the planet to talk to, and get along with.

 

I like your comment about being too busy frowning at peoples' use of language to notice the intelligent points they may have. My forehead hurts sometimes! No matter how intelligent a person is, or how perfectly logical they may be, when they treat spelling as a novelty, the majority of their credibility goes instantly out the window for me. That may be illogical and unfair, but it's the way I am. It forces me to feel superior, which I feel uncomfortable with, because I strongly dislike people who think of themselves that way. Basically, they make me disappointed in myself. I look down at myself for looking down at others... Wow, this is confusing. Do I need to have my head examined? Most likely... At least I can admit it.

 

[VampireNaomi]

Well, I don't mind capitalizing after ellipses (often do it myself, too!) because there are countless mistakes I make myself. All I really ask from people is that their posts are readable, a few mistakes here and there shouldn't matter.

 

Wow, I'm starting to feel guilty about posting such short replies to your insightful posts!

[Grifter_Grifts]

"Insightful" I like that... Much better than "neurotic". Hehe...

 

Yep, mistakes are just part of life... I don't mind honest spelling mistakes at all... Just the "blatant disregard for spelling" spelling mistakes. You know- People who appear to type by hitting their keyboard with a cat.

 

Heck, sometimes when I'm writing, I can't remember which way a J goes! Seriously. I've had to think for a second, a few times.

 

.cixelsyd m'I ebyaM

[Frenkieee]

Wow, speaking about rants!

 

I use lol, omg, wtf and btw quite often, but most of the time on MSN or boards where the intellectual level ain't that high and my messages are short.

 

I do get annoyed by people who don't use capitals or interpunction and spelling like m8 instead of mate, 4 instead of for, 2 instead of two/to/too. All these abbreviation is part of leet-speak: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leet. Here in the Netherlands, such speak is called "breezah-taal", where taal means language. A Bacardi Breezer is an alcoholic drink that all the teenage girls drink. Those girls (slutty etc., you know the deal) type like this on the web and thus they were called "breezahsletjes": breezersluts. Breezersletje has even been added to our national dictionary

 

Anyway, when I'm just posting short messages I like to add a lol/wtf/omg every now and then, but when posting message like this one, I make sure every capital is correct and the interpunction is in order.

 

Maybe it has to do with our intellectual level? Don't know yours though

[lipton]

i love this discussion hehe

 

and this is my contribute, which im sure you will enjoy...watch

http://www.kinkendo.org/images/lotrwow.gif

[Grifter_Grifts]

Hey, thanks for the info! Some pretty interesting stuff there. As humans, we're pretty much all the same, but it's great to get perspectives from around the world.

 

I have lived in the England and Canada, crossing back and forth quite regularly. I see alot of similarities, but notice a delay in general slang between the two countries. I remember when "sweet" and "da bomb" first became popular sayings in Canada, in 1996. It was almost a year before I ever heard them uttered in England. It took about the same time for "that's boss" to travel from England to Canada.

 

Typical British words like "rubbish" and "wank" were rarely used in Canada, until just a few years ago. Actually, wank has now taken on a second definition here, being used to describe someone, rather than an action. The word "wanker" has been discarded, and "wank" now assumes both roles.

 

I attribute the sudden adoption of these words to the growing popularity of British films here. There is a large cult following now, and as more films are featured here, more of the lingo crosses the divide. British films receive standing ovations in Canada! No Canadian or American ones do... It's unheard of!

 

One huge stereotype Canadians used to hold dearly was that all Brits used perfectly proper english. You know... The typical snooty, upscale tea and crumpet kind. When I first moved here, I was amazed at how little people knew about the UK. England, and the rest of the UK for that matter, is probably the king of improper speech! Have you ever heard a typical person from Liverpool speak? It's like another language altogether. You can also discover multitudes of accents per city. England is the only place I know of where you can have several accents, just from living in different areas within one city! Thanks to British movies, this stereotype has, for the most part, disappeared over the past ten years. The Full Monty and Sean of the Dead were two major influences.

 

Of course, there are still plenty of misinformed people out there, from both sides. I imagine I have plenty of innocent and wildly inaccurate assumptions about much of the world. Some things just can't be fully learned until experienced first hand...

[Grifter_Grifts]

Thanks, Lipton! I had a good laugh watching that.

 

Just imagine sitting through the entire movie in that format! Ooh, I just got a chill...

[Frenkieee]

Don't forget this one:

[Grifter_Grifts]

"We are surrender!" Classic... Do you have any idea how much of this I have to put up with, running a Day of Defeat server?

 

Lol noobs u got pwned! We R so L33t LMAO. GG, GG

 

WTF?! U haxxor nub campers! RTV! RTV! OMG OMG OMG ADMIN RTV

 

Mpvt PLS. Admin BAN HAKR! HES HAKIN

 

NO IM L33T ROFL NOOB AYBABTU!!!

 

VOTEBAN VOTEBAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

I was poking around in my word filter list after doing some updates, and I thought it would be funny to copy the entire server log transcript in there, so nobody could ever type like this again... But that would be mean.

 

[lipton]

hehe

 

i used to play World of warcraft and after 2 hours in an instance along with a group of 5 there aint that much time to write, so it was often in such mis-spelling

[Du Man]

this discussion reminds me of the character "moot" from the ARG (Alternate Reality Game) LockJaw. I would explain why but the bastards locked the relivant document (an email by moot) in their yahoo user group, which by the way does any one know how you register for this? Yahoo keeps making me go in circles with their damn registration process.