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Quote This Ish Out!


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Don't know where the old quote thread drifted off to, don't want to look for it, but felt like throwing this into the pot:

 

"This has to be one of the best CDs ever. Mindless Self Indulgence kicks anyones ass one is comes to beats.

This is the best for become a mindless cracker. If your not one yet, you'll be hooked on this CD like drugs!"

-Catherine M. Mamone (Lake Worth, Florida, United States), in her Amazon.com review of Frankenstein Girls Will Seem Strangely Sexy

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A string of memorable lines from Don Hertzfeldt's designer diaries:

 

"i heard they captured saddam hussein yesterday, discovered him living inside of a hole in the floor of a farmhouse since april. also in the hole was a cache of animation equipment for a project he had been working on, alongside an art desk. saddam's pencil tests were described as 'very promising'"

-December 15th, 2003

 

"have been obsessively noticing birds everywhere i go now, and sat at the light staring at a flock of them swirl after evening bugs over the corner gas station, thinking about how difficult that must have been to animate. yesterday i was watching the big white herons by the bluffs and thought their movement didn't look quite right. back in school deep in lily & jim i remember staring sleepless at people's mouths around town, thinking they all seemed 2-3 frames out of sync when they spoke. all of these bits are still trading months for seconds of screen time, and i think the first time i watch the film in full all of these years will spontaneously catch up with me and i'll wither up and implode into a shrivelled twitchy mooing relic. i don't know why mooing."

-January, 2004

 

"about a week ago i had a dream that i was visiting the earth from another planet (mars?) in a little spaceship from which i was greeted by thousands and thousands of happy little waving people below.. but i sadly hadn't time to land and soon had to fly back home alone again after a brief visit.. after the last 2 months thus ended the most stupidly easy dream to interpret ever.. i guess not a lot of mysterious reverse talking riddle dwarves going on in this subconscious. they are re-tarring the roads outside and it is all thick and smokey tonight, you can't really go out"

-November 23rd, 2003

 

"there's something nostalgic about being sick, something weird about the chemistry that triggers flashbacks of all the times you've been sick before in your life. my shooting routine has been delayed a bit but i'm more concerned about getting sound underway this week, as picture is practically locked now and looking solid. i think i figured out the film's ending last week, we cut out three shots at the end and put in a new one and it's worked surprisingly well. last night i dreamt of looking down on the planet after a giant ice age had wiped everyone out, realizing that earth's sole contribution to the entire cosmos was merely millions of hours of bad television."

September 15th, 2004

 

"the amazing sleeping bunny burned her leg on a motorcycle pipe

during the first debate our president appeared to be uncomfortably sucking on a lemon, possibly because he only brought 20 minutes of material to a 90 minute debate. he said 'multi pronged' a few times in reference to iraq, and of his wife he noted, 'it's hard work, loving her and supporting her'. canada is looking pretty good. sometimes i think i have a brain tumor.. all year it seems ive been having trouble speaking in basic complete sentences or communicating thoughts from their cages. i keep having dreams of giant lizards on beaches. formidable sunning lizards. it seems to be time to find a halloween costume.. i was going to go as a tetris block and wedge myself into doorframes and table corners all night but rob says it's been done."

October 1+2, 2004

 

"i think everything from basic vocals to deep experiments can be recorded right here now.. tonight i've slowed down a jungle environment by a factor of 250 and it sounds beautiful. god speaks through cartoon. my eyes hurt"

-October 1+2, 2004

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Okay, came across this one and felt the need to add it. this is the last... (in creepy Mr. Zorg voice from The Fifth Element, as portrayed by the inimitable Gary Oldman... whom I am imitating... making... me... inimitable too?) (ahem) creepycreepycreepy for now creepycreepycreepy.

 

"last night i dreamt i was somewhere in washington dc. dumped alongside the road were giant piles of elephant carcasses, each of them chopped neatly into halves. someone in the car explained that a local corporation bisected elephants in their regular process of manufacturing cheap peanut butter. a wasteful corporation, this person complained, in light of all of the unused front and end elephant halves discarded here. i wondered aloud why they didn't just make the peanut butter from the peanuts the elephants ate, and somebody scoffed and said something flippant and strange about feeding glue to horses. it's pouring rain outside. hey don't forget to vote next week or i will be mad at you.. "

-October 27th, 2004

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  • 2 weeks later...

"Never argue with an idiot.

They drag you down to their level,

then beat you with experience."

-- unknown

 

It's just a phase, he'll grow out of it. Do you remember the two weeks Peter spent narrating his own life?

 

"I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Lois had placed in front of me. Of course I'd never tell her how disgusted I was with her cooking, but somehow I think she knew. Lois had always been full of energy and life, but lately I had begun to grow more aware of her aging. The bright exuberant eyes that I had fallen in love with were now beginning to grow dull and listless, with the long fatigue of a weary life."

*Lois punches him*

"I awoke, several hours later, in a daze."

-- Peter Griffin, Family Guy episode "Peter Griffin: Husband, Father... Brother?"

 

"See the cheetah, oh so supple, lean and quick

As he chases a gazzelle

But he can't drive a car

At least not very far"

-- Denis Leary song "Save This"

 

"I want an emulator that, every time you try to load a game, there's a 6% chance it pops up a dialog that says "It's not loading! Tap the A button to blow the dust out."

-- bash.org quote #948

 

"A CRAY is the only computer that runs an endless loop in just 4 hours..."

-- unknown

 

while(!asleep()) sheep++;

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"Lad it's your duty to find ye a lass

With child-bearing hips and pink supple ass

And make her your mife, and love her with love so true.

Some rivers run high, some rivers run low,

When her river runs red then she's starting her flow,

And it's called menstruation and here's what it means to you...

You will notice her bloomers are spotty at first,

Stand back, her ovarian dam's gonna burst,

So don't be afraid, it's a natural ting,

Just wad up some cotton and hand her some string,

Put the old linens on top o' the bed,

Get out of the house and go down to the old pub instead."

-Stephen Lynch, Down To The Old Pub Instead

 

"Good art keeps you warm."

-Andy Goldworthy

 

"Sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll... cut out the drugs and there's more time for sex."

-maybe the only worthwhile thing Stephen Tyler has ever said.

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Don't ask me why I feel the need to share this stuff when I find it, but I do.

 

"if yur thinking of this go for it. sum people prefer their earlier stuff but some people always do.

 

you'd be stoked if you got this for chanukah."

-isisrob's amazon.com review of Enon's Hocus Pocus

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