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Razputin's Life:Chapter 2 (pt.2)


zelda 41

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Refresh your memery:Lili is at the circus. She finds Milla at the circus.

 

" Milla!!" It was her! Lili's heart did flips over and over.

 

"Milla, why are you here?" Lili asked.

 

"Your father called me to come with you, darling!" Milla explained.

 

"Okay, lets go," Lili said. So, the two walked across the parking lot to the big tent,that was just starting the show.

 

"Hey,Milla?" Lili asked,"Why does this circus suck?"

 

Milla answered,"Because, it just does, sweetie."

 

---

Just then, the young boy, Raz, walked into the big tent.

 

"Okay. I'm ready."

 

 

End of Chapter 2

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Please... or make a blog and post chapters there, just please, please, please, quit making more or my companions in the educational god pantheon (that's right, I'm a god and a superhero, like Thor.) will beat on you. Like Albegra, god of math, and Kemiko, god of science.

 

As well as my personal lackeys Crammar and Punch-uation.

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I'm not crazy, you're calling me crazy, I'm not crazy. I just want somthing I can never have and am planning to steal it from the snobby bitch who'm everyone loves and adores! I swear!!!How would you feel Cheez if your girlfriend didn't like you, and she never would go out with you because you a little different than everyone else. And by that she meant you were ugly, fat, and everything about you will never become anything important and she wished you were dead!

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SHUT THE HECK UP!!! IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT, STOP READING IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

We have every right to critizice it. If we don't like the people beating up other people does that mean we should ignore it?

 

Okay, extreme and quite silly but you get my point.

 

I don't hate you, I don't think you suck, I'm not trying to attack you, I just think you need to brush up on your writing. If you need help get a beta. I am a beta myself and would be glad to guide you through writing techniques and such.

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If this was posted in your own personal blog, that would be a valid complaint. But since you posted it in a public forum, it's open for critique.

Even then no. If this was in their personal diary yes. But once something is on the internet all hell breaks loose.

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