[fic] Prior to Exile

[Bee Hoon]

Vrook exclaimed, but got more silent the closer to the end of his sentences.

Mm? What do you mean by this?

 

I also knew that Vrook would not strike me, so I had nothing to be afraid of.

Goodness, that shouldn't even be a consideration! As your lovely analogy put it, Vrook is loud but harmless--he is still after all, a very good Jedi, albeit prone to being close-minded, painfully blunt and confrontational.

 

“That was an open threat. Fear is often a powerful motivator and it had worked very well for her.

This is pretty odd. If you recall the Jedi code, their first tenet it "There is no emotion, there is peace". I can imagine Vrook intimidating her only either unconsciously, or to teach her a lesson in mastering her emotions.

 

That wasn’t what I wanted to do because she was feeling restrained and leaving her alone with no escape would only have made things worse.

Feeling restrained?

 

All in all, it was an interesting chapter. One thing though: why did the Order take Kalin on at age of 13? Even if they did so, wouldn't it be reasonable to put her through the same training that younglings receive before assigning her to a master, especially one as demanding as Vrook? Kalin's desire to go home was expressed nicely, and she sounds like an emo teenager all right I'd like to see the end of this particular mini story arc before I comment further, so keep writing!

[Darth_Yuthura]

I had arranged to meet Atris after I spoke with Kavar. Although I didn’t get to him, my timetable had not really changed. Kalin was just going to have to put up with us for a while or return to her quarters. I just hoped that she liked sparing.

 

-----

 

“You’re late.” Atris said, putting away the book she was reading.

 

“Why do you read those ancient books? A datapadd is much more convenient.”

 

She pulled out the book and waved it in front of me. “Doesn’t seem a bit hollow to you? There’s nothing to me like the texture of the paper and the creases of the spine to show how common or rare the knowledge is. This book is decades old, but has barely been looked at. I am learning things that few others know. You can’t get this from the network.”

 

Kalin saw the book had no title. “What are you reading?”

 

Atris turned her attention to Kalin. “It’s a journal written by Master Devon.” She looked to me. “Who’s this? ‘You taking on a Padawan already?”

 

I looked at her as if insulted, but only because of how ridiculous the assumption was. I looked at Kalin and then back to Atris. “No... This is Kalin. We knew each other from Dantooine.”

 

Atris bowed her head. “It’s nice to meet you, Kalin. Who ‘is’ your master? Why aren’t you with him?”

 

I answered. “An apprentice is not conjoined to her master Atris. Kalin’s under my supervision, though.”

 

She made a sound of annoyance. “Is she any good at sparing, or are you just baby-sitting?”

 

Kalin frowned, but kept her peace.

 

“Kalin’s with me as a friend. Treat her with proper respect.”

 

She shrugged her shoulders. “Very well. Are we going to dual, or what?”

 

I turned my head. “Would Kalin like to take part in this, or just watch?”

 

She likely was not fond of going up against a full Jedi Knight, let alone two. “You’d... welcome me? I’m not that great with a lightsaber.”

 

I smiled at her. “It’s the only way to get better.”

 

Atris interrupted. “Wait. I wanted to spar with you, not to do a training session. If you two want to spar with each other, do it another time because I don’t want to go up against an amateur.”

 

That made Kalin frown again, but I got between them. “What if you two went up against me? It would be a good chance for both of you to use teamwork against me.”

 

“Not interested. She wouldn’t stand a chance against you and I don’t want to have to protect her.”

 

“Atris, this would be every bit as good for you as it would for us. The difference between guardians and the other Jedi is that they aren’t trained for self defense and attacking, but also for defending others. You are every bit as capable as a guardian when going against an opponent, but when you have to protect others or fulfill a specified goal, it becomes much more difficult.”

 

She sighed and stared at Kalin as if trying to study her capabilities before even seeing her perform. Then she reluctantly went along with it. “Very well.”

 

Kalin raised her hands and stepped back. “Never mind. I don’t want to be a burden. You just do what you want and I’ll just watch.”

 

Atris didn’t face her. “No, I’ll have you. Just don’t get in the way.”

 

“She’s not helpless, Atris. You should coordinate your efforts with Kalin and you’ll be able to do much more than if you just go about like a drunken gizka.”

 

She sighed deeply and looked as though I were forcing Kalin upon her. Although I was, it was for her best interests. Atris was good enough with a lightsaber, but she should have been prepared to throw herself in front of innocents to defend them when negotiations got violent. She was effective at self defense, but Jedi were often not the ones being targeted.

 

We all got training sabers, which were special lightsabers equipped with a blade that used minimal energy for generating a solid beam and only caused first-degree burns to skin. The greatest risk of injury came from being physically hit by the solid beam while the burns were only superficial.

 

Kalin naturally had a single hilt while Atris has chosen to follow the tradition of Councilors and took a single hilt as well. I had chosen to use twin lightsabers because they simply were the most flexible of all the lightsaber styles I knew of.

 

A single hilt often were meant to be used with two hands, so it was not realistic to use a hilt that was more than 15 centimeters long. I opted for two hilts (both of which were just long enough to fit both hands) because it also allowed for me to throw one and animate it with the Force without leaving myself open to blaster fire.

 

The saberstaff was a very difficult weapon to handle because it was almost as dangerous for the wielder as for an opponent. The hilt itself was also much more difficult to choose because you needed it to be small enough to conceal, but the shorter it was, the less leverage you could get. Theoretically, you could get it down to 15 cm and all you had was your wrist for leverage, but I found 35 cm was the ideal size. Still, I hated that opposite blade.

 

Another style was the standard/shoto combination. I found it awkward to use two different weapons, so I just opted for perfect balance in weight and blade length. There was little reason to just have a short blade when a longer one made no difference. It would have for a sword, but not a blade of energy.

 

Shien style was just a standard saber opposite of the way the hilt would normally be held. I found that on occasion, I could use this for my left hand to get the leverage I needed to block while my right gave me the flexibility of a standard saber. Often, I just don’t bother with it at all because of the limitations that came with it.

 

When the three of us were ready, we had to actually test the lightsabers to ensure beyond a doubt that they were safe. They were true lightsabers designed not to exceed a specified power limit, but there have been concerns that lethal sabers could be disguised as training variants. In order to ensure there could not be any mistakes or sabotage, both opponents must see the other’s saber pass a scanner without an alarm blaring. If the saber was safe, it was allowed through. If not... I never tried it.

 

Of course, there were no problems, but the last thing I wanted was a training accident. On the floor were several circles clearly marked that defined the boundaries for duels to take place. Most were about 15 meters wide, but there were much larger areas for multiple participants to fight in teams or pairs. I chose one of the larger circles and got to one edge, but when I turned around, I saw Atris talking to Kalin about how to team up against me.

 

That made me feel a little better to see Atris actually taking my advice and not just going through the motions. She was a solitary creature, much like Vrook, but if I were to encourage her to work with others, she might become a ‘team player’ among the Jedi... she needed to if she hoped to get on the Council.

 

When the two had come to a proposed attack plan, I was looking forward to how things came out. “Alright... no Force abilities. Just skill against skill alone. Is that alright with you?”

 

Atris shook her head. “Limited Force abilities... we would like to apply the Force with lightsabers alone. Nothing beyond that.”

 

“Alright. Whenever you’re ready.”

 

-----

 

For the next hour, we sparred under various conditions and I even had Kalin with me going against Atris a few times. I was surprised how good the padawan of two years was with a lightsaber, but she was clearly no match for either me or Atris. At first, she seemed to enjoy the matches, but I noticed she was becoming increasingly aggressive and reckless.

 

I knew that our sparing was much like the situation with Vrook, so I called the match in a bit early. Atris was a bit disappointed, but she accepted my wishes and even offered to keep practicing against Kalin, but the whole point was to get her out of another ‘no-win’ situation. I said Kalin was still under my supervision and that ended it w/out making my intentions too apparent.

 

When Atris was gone, Kalin looked very agitated and I was careful not to set her off. “You’re very good with a lightsaber.”

 

“Well it’s not like I was of any help to either one of you. Atris would have done just as well not having to come to my rescue each time.”

 

“It was a team effort, Kalin. And this was just practice.”

 

“I could never hit either of you! Even when I was on your side, I didn’t hit Atris unless you opened her up for me. I was terrible!”

 

I put my hands on her shoulders, but she brushed them away. “I’ve been doing this for over a decade. I’ve been trained to do this. You have only been using a lightsaber for how long?”

 

She sighed in discomfort. “A year and a half.”

 

“Do you think that I was any better then than you are now? Do you know what I did to change that?”

 

“What?” She said, expecting a short and easy answer.

 

I had only the same kind she heard dozens of times before. It was not the answer that was difficult, but the demands that were required in which were difficult to accept. “I spared with Master Kavar. He is a far greater swordsman than I am now, but I kept practicing with him time and time again... knowing that I was going to lose.”

 

“I know... I’ve heard it a thousand times... you improve by pushing yourself. That’s what Master Vrook always said.” She complained.

 

“That’s part of it, yes. However, it can become very disheartening to lose and to fail time and time again. It it important that when something like this happens, you recognize it was because the challenge was too great. I saw how frustrated you became near the end of the matches and I didn’t want you to believe you were being judged in any way. I just hoped that it could take your mind off things for a while.”

 

She sighed and paused for a moment before responding. “Your friend didn’t seem to want me with her. At first, I was flattered that you would invite me to dual at your level, but I thought I could have at least held my own against a Jedi knight. I thought I might have been able to defeat you or Atris at least once.”

 

I smiled and shook my head. “I was much like that when I spared with Master Kavar. I did get a lucky hit now and again, but the majority of times, I didn’t even touch him. I accepted that he was a master and that even as I lost, I became a little better with each match. Eventually, I tried using two lightsabers and I realized that I was beating him one out of five times... as opposed to one in a hundred or so.” I placed my hands on her shoulders. “You will find that over the course of our lives, we will fail many more times than we succeed. The only time when you should be ashamed is if you could have done something to prevent it.”

 

She looked up to me as though I were the master she should have had. Although I have been supporting her for only the course of two days, I think that I came to understand her better than her current master ever has. “Master Vrook never made that distinction.”

 

“Well I’m not trying to attack Master Vrook. He is a great instructor, but there are certain students and masters who don’t work well with each other.”

 

She leaned her head forward as if ashamed. “So does that mean I was not up to my master’s expectations? I thought that was what he wanted in his padawans... he said that any other instructor would demand just as much from me.”

 

I nodded. “Learning to use the Force always demands extreme effort and self-discipline. That won’t change, but it doesn’t mean hard work translates directly to what you learn. It’s just as important to know how best to manage your time as it is to exert yourself.”

 

She sighed as if she’s heard that lecture before and was bored with having it repeated. After a moment, she shrugged her shoulders. “Alexandra, I appreciate what you’re doing, but I really don’t want you to get in trouble because of me.”

 

“It’s alright. We all need help now and again. I would just ask that when you see another in your position, remember today and be willing to help them and we all benefit.”

 

“Master Vrook says that all the time, but he never explains how that is so. How do you benefit from any of this... why do you go out of your way to help me? Aren’t you going to be put in a bad position? Master Vrook isn’t exactly the forgiving type.”

 

I knew she was right. Even though I did a good deed, Master Vrook likely have reprimanded me because I interfered with him and his padawan. Despite the end result being better for Kalin, I was going to be disciplined because of my part in all this. That was not exactly very encouraging, but I could at least sleep better knowing I did the right thing... even if no one else believed the same thing.

 

“Yes, I will likely be punished for this. However, I can live with a week of extra duties. At least I could do it knowing it spared you of whatever pressure was put on you by Master Vrook. I knew what I was getting myself into from the moment I heard you were his apprentice, but don’t worry about me. Master Vrook was once where I am, but through acts such as mine, he eventually became a Council member... that’s not something you can just be given... it must be earned. I was once where you are and I know someday, you’ll be looking over a young padawan who needs a little encouragement, knowing that you’re doing the right thing.”

 

She smiled very warmly at me. “Thanks, Alexandra. I’ll do that for you.”

 

I shook my head again. “Don’t do it for me, but for yourself. We, the Jedi, are interdependent, so by helping one, we become a better society. The more you believe that, the faster you will progress as a Force user. Dealing with conflicts are the way we grow and influence the Galaxy, so remember that conflict and chaos are a natural way of life. We follow the code by finding where there is conflict and bringing balance to the Force.”

 

She smiled nervously. “I’m sorry, but I didn’t understand. Can you explain it again?”

 

I pat her on the shoulder. “I’m afraid it’s not something that can be explained. You’ll understand once you’ve lived by it.”

[Darth_Yuthura]

This is the start of a new storyline. From here is when Alexandra realizes she has to choose a side.

 

-----

 

There was an old saying that no good deed went unpunished. Obviously, that was not true, but there were times when it made sense. This was one of those times.

 

Master Vrook turned out to be more stubborn than I ever imagined. I was under the belief that his arrogance had a limit that did not directly infringe upon his responsibilities as a Jedi. When I told Vrook that it was in Kalin’s best interest to be released from him, he asked me a question that I could not possibly answer in my favor. “How many years have you been teaching? What makes you think you would know better than me about my own Padawan?”

 

I could not deny that he had decades’ worth of experience, but that in itself didn’t constitute proof that he knew what was best for Kalin. Master Vrook had a military mind when it came to his students. Although a number of his students had ended up on Telos, those who become Jedi under him were among the best within the Order. His teachings were very much like those within the Mandalorian culture where the adversity their warriors faced only made them stronger. Those that didn’t make it ultimately died or were dishonored. Kalin was one of those who would have broken under the pressure she was under.

 

Why then would I have wanted to have her within the Order, in addition to having others depend on her? I wondered that as well, but ultimately felt that Kalin had the potential to be a Jedi... maybe not a great Jedi, but at least an average student of the Force. Just because someone couldn’t make the cut with Master Vrook didn’t mean s/he should have broken down and been rejected like a Mandalorian recruit.

 

Master Vrook didn’t see it that way. He believed that there were always going to be more than enough Force-sensitives in the Galaxy, but only so many qualified to teach and so many who could be taught at a time. Therefore, if Kalin didn’t make the cut, it was important to reject her and allow only the best of the best to train. Otherwise, the Jedi would only weaken themselves by accepting imperfection within its recruits and discouraging the talent and dedication of those who devoted themselves more greatly than Kalin.

 

Despite my best efforts, Vrook was unwilling to accept my recommendations and ‘would not give up on her’ his exact words were. When I refused to back down, he came up with a cruel compromise that forced me to prove what I told him. “If you think you know better, then prove me wrong. Why don’t you take over and show me exactly how I should train her?”

 

“You want me[i/] to train her?”

 

“You know nothing about training a padawan. Maybe once you’ve tried, you would gain an appreciation for the difficulties that come with it. And it would only make sense since you’re criticizing me... show me what you would do instead.” He said, leaned back in his chair, arms crossed, and a smug smile on his face.

 

I exhaled deeply. “I think you’re just looking for an excuse to get out of your responsibility to her.”

 

He frowned. “You are the one who interfered with me and my padawan! You’re fortunate that I don’t put sanctions upon you. Since you wanted to get involved... now you are.”

 

I shook my head. “I wanted what was in her best interests. I wasn’t trying to proclaim that I was a better instructor than you, but there are better instructors for her than either of us.”

 

“You are the only one who has made that claim, but I’m not just dismissing you out of hand. If you want to avoid sanctions, then you will accept responsibility for Kalin and show me my mistakes by instructing her better than I had.”

 

“What? For how long?” I asked.

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “If you make a decent effort, I’d give you a week. If you can’t handle the responsibility or you have a negative influence on her, I’m taking her back and you will suffer the consequences of your actions.”

 

“And if I do a decent job with her?”

 

“Then I’ll leave her in your... capable hands. After that, you can either continue instructing her, or give the responsibility to whom you believe would be best. However, it will require her to show a vast improvement that she had not under my instruction. That means you’ll have do more than simply watch her. I want to see for myself the validity of your claim, otherwise, whatever happens to her will be on your head.”

 

-----

 

I remembered that conversation like it was a month ago. In reality, it was only three days since I took over for Vrook. Kalin was asleep after a long day, but I was unable to sleep. She was much more difficult to work with than I originally thought. Master Vrook’s technique was actually exactly what had to be done to motivate her to do what she didn’t want to.

 

I originally believed that he was just being hard on her, but I had come to the realization that she was more lazy than I would have expected. When I gave her the freedom to that Master Vrook had denied, she didn’t read the scientific journal articles and only skimmed through the book I had given her. When I confronted her to ask questions from the book, she gave me only a very limited level of detail as if to make it seem she read the book, but couldn’t answer some very basic questions about the history or why historic figures did what they had to. It was very discouraging that she would do that to me.

 

After that long third day, I felt I needed some advice more than ever from Master Kavar. He was working late, so I knew I could say a few things before the night was out.

 

“Alexandra, how’s your new padawan progressing?”

 

“Master Vrook told you about me and Kalin?”

 

“I think everyone is aware of it.”

 

I released a devastated sigh and fell into the chair opposite Kavar. “I wouldn’t have imagined he’d want something like this to become so public. He wanted me to humiliate myself in front of everyone. He knew I was going to fail.” I threw my head back and stared at the ceiling.

 

“What happened?”

 

“She’s lazy.” I scoffed. “It’s as simple as that, yet it makes all the difference.”

 

“That doesn’t sound like one of Vrook’s padawans to me.”

 

I sighed and looked into his eyes. “Well she does have the capabilities, but I can’t pressure her like Master Vrook. I told her that he had been demanding too much, so I can’t do what he had; otherwise, she’ll act towards me in the same way that she acted towards Vrook.” I stood up and looked in another direction. “But at the same time, she needs to show improvement. If I’m too gentle, she’ll become content and remain exactly where she is.”

 

“I can understand that. It’s difficult to watch someone you care about struggle, especially when you’re the one subjecting them to the adversity.” He put down the data pad he was no longer focused on. “You should ask yourself something: would it be better for her to struggle here and now, or to do so when her life depends on doing the right thing at the right time?”

 

I turned around and stared into his eyes. “I know what you’re saying, but she has already been through a lot and needs time to recuperate from the soul-crushing experience of Master Vrook’s training. I can’t push her while she’s in such a fragile state.”

 

“Would an enemy be so accommodating?” He paused. “If Kalin cannot hold up under the pressures that come from training, then would you be doing her a favor by making things easier for her?”

 

“The most difficult path is not always the best. I just wanted to give her a chance to become a Jedi. She would not make it under Vrook’s standards, but I’m sure she could at least pass the minimal requirements. She probably won’t be a model Jedi, but she shouldn’t just be cast aside if we could do something to change that.”

 

He stood up and put his hands on my shoulders. “Alexandra, I know that you only mean her well, but Kalin has to be able to stand up and excel on her own if she is to become a Jedi. That is our nature... to do what is difficult or what no one else wants to do. Is that seriously what you would expect of the girl?”

 

I stepped back and sat down to think. “I guess that I was just trying to help her ease into the life of a Jedi. She was much older than I was when she was accepted, so naturally her transition would have been more difficult. She was homeless, so there was not much of life worth going back to. She feared being sent to Telos, so it seemed the best life for her was this one.”

 

“This is not like any other life she could just choose. To be a Jedi, she must make the sacrifices that are necessary. If it means that much to her, she’ll work for it. If not, you can’t force her to do anymore than she is willing.” He sat down and gave me a sympathetic stare. “Tell her what she must do, but remind her of the consequences if she doesn’t listen to you. If she wants to be a Jedi, then it is up to you to treat her as such. If you have to be hard on her, it is because she wants something greater. That’s why you’re hard on her; because the greatest rewards have to be earned... otherwise they lose their value. How special would you feel if just anyone could become a Jedi?”

 

I lowered my head and bit my bottom lip. I feared that Kalin was not up to the challenge ahead. Although she had the ability, if she didn’t want it enough, there was no way for her to become a Jedi. We put ourselves through more adversity than we predict in order to deal with the unexpected demands placed upon us. I knew that I was going to have to become as harsh and demanding as the very one I told her she never had to deal with again.

 

I looked up to Master Kavar. “I shouldn’t have interfered, should I?”

 

Kavar looked at me sympathetically again. “Your heart was in the right place, but this is one of life’s lessons that can only be learned through experience. Don’t feel responsible if Kalin doesn’t make it. Even if your actions inevitably result in her expulsion, your part was only the shriek that caused the cataclysmic avalanche.”

 

I stood up and turned to the door. “Well an avalanche only happens when snow has collected on the side of a mountain and hasn’t been allowed to fall for a long period of time. The less frequent the event, the greater the disaster. After it happens, it’s easier to keep from happening again...” I paced around the office, but Kavar didn’t ask what I had in mind. “It just means allowing her to blow up now and again in the right places.”

 

“Alexandra?”

 

“Thanks, Master Kavar. I think I know what I have to do.”

 

“Don’t do anything that could escalate this further!” He shouted before I was out.

 

“What if I took a page out of Vrook’s book? I’ll just do what he would and if he complains, I’ll at least prove him wrong.”

 

“Alexandra!”

 

I poked my head back through his door. “I’m just kidding.”

 

-----

 

The next day, I awoke Kalin early in the morning. Although I said she had the morning at her leisure, I felt it was more important to get her up to speed sooner than later. She wasn’t very fond of being dragged out of bed and getting dressed, but she did so without question. When she answered the door, fully dressed and ready to leave, I invited her to come to the archives with me.

 

“Kalin, you said you had difficulty reading that book I gave you, so it would only make sense that you should get a broader understanding of Mandalorian history. If you understand more about the part the Mandalorians played in the war with Exar Kunn, then you would get a better understanding about them today.” I said as we walked down the hallway.

 

“Alexandra, I tried, but that book was the most boring thing I’ve read since... well there are a lot of things Master Vrook gave me. Why can’t I just choose what I want to read? There’s an almost infinite number of topics out there. What if I read about...”

 

I interrupted her. “I don’t know if you’re aware of it or not, but the Mandalorians have been the hottest topic in the archives for at least the last decade. It’s important that we keep up with current events. Although it’s good that you have an interest in Twi’lek history, Echani religion, or Bothan culture... they are not the subject at hand.”

 

“Alexandra... please. I don’t want to learn about the Mandalorians.” She pleaded.

 

I turned around. “Why is that? Is it because they’re difficult to understand?”

 

She nodded her head. “That and most of what we know is speculation. They never explain anything directly. Why should we put so much faith in something that might not even be accurate?”

 

“Maybe, but for now, it’s the best we have. Maybe by reading of them, you may even be able to figure out the answers for yourself.” I started walking again.

 

“I don’t want to understand why they are so brutal. All I’ve come to know is that they are unthinking animals with no respect for anything other than to fight... and to conquer. What good would it do to understand why they are so violent?”

 

“There is a perfect example right there. Animals don’t build great empires. There is a reason why they are the way they are. Just because we don’t understand doesn’t mean there is no logic or reason behind their acts.”

 

“Right. They massacre a planet and steal their resources. Anyone who doesn’t die either runs away or is enslaved. Are you saying it’s difficult to understand why they do that? What good would it do to know about their culture, philosophy, or any of that?”

 

After we got to an elevator, we waited for the next car to stop for us. “You’d be surprised how complicated they really are. They have a sense of honor that does not come from an animal instinct. What we take for granted are often just as strange to them as they are to us. It doesn’t mean they are wrong or that we are right just because we don’t believe the same thing. What separates us from them is that we look at both sides before we back one.” When the door opened, I stepped on board with Kalin behind me. There was another who moved to the back when we stopped.

 

“That’s why we should not get involved with the war? That we could just as easily find a way to use their beliefs against them?”

 

“That is a sensitive topic. I don’t want you to discuss in publicly.”

 

She sighed in frustration and crossed her arms to show her dislike for what I was trying to do. If she did something out of line, then I would have reminded her of the greater goal that she was working for. At least for the time, I did not have to say what she already knew. Something so obvious should have been instinct to her already, so I didn’t have to repeat it.

 

-----

 

I took Kalin through the main hall of the archives and into the back, where the paper books could be found. I felt that it made me feel ‘wiser’ to read from manuscripts instead of from the main computer terminals. The Galaxy was so sophisticated that we often forget the subtleties of simply flipping a page to look upon words that were made up of pen strokes and pigments. I had learned how to write my own books in that fashion, but found I didn’t have the time to actually write when I could just do it verbally and translate my words into writing many times faster.

 

I was trying to find a way to get Kalin more interested in the learning process so that she would have been more enthused to study with me or by herself, so that was why I ignored the terminal and looked for knowledge the old fashioned way. Kalin wasn’t very fond of following me into the back chamber, but didn’t complain. I could almost sense her patience evaporating with every act I took. It was one thing for me to ask something as a friend, but as a master... I felt my authority had become much more provisional.

 

Although I was only expecting to have her for a week, Kalin was left in the dark about what was going on. From her perspective, I had assumed Vrook’s role and would be with her until her trials had been completed. It was an additional burden that I did not enjoy, but she had to believe this was a long-term thing. Otherwise, she would behave differently.

 

When I turned a corner and found the isle that held manuscripts on the Mandalorians, I was quite surprised to see Alek leafing through old documents. He didn’t seem the kind who preferred books over more modern mediums to get knowledge. Although some Jedi liked the traditional books made of paper, others would only search for info using digital means due to its efficiency. Alek seemed one of those who only followed tradition for as long as it didn’t interfere with his ability to get the job done.

 

“Alek... what are you doing here?”

 

He glanced at me a fraction of a second before turning his gaze back on one of the books. “I had been offered to take piloting lessons from a friend. I decided to take him up on that offer and came here.”

 

I stared at him for a moment, not understanding what he said.

 

He gave me a stern expression. “I’m looking for a document! Why else would I be here?”

 

“Alright, alright! It was just a question.” I paused for a moment before pulling out a book from near his position. “What exactly are you looking for anyway? I thought you would have just preferred to use the net. Why come here?”

 

He turned his attention to me. “Because most of these documents are not available anywhere else. If they are lost, the knowledge they contain is lost forever.”

 

“Why don’t they back the books with a digital medium? It certainly would take less space and time to just photograph the books. And it would make finding the knowledge easier from anywhere.” I said.

 

“Well that’s one of the reasons they don’t do that. They fear that by putting everything on the net, then everything could potentially fall into the wrong hands. All you need is one Jedi’s access code and everything in the electronic archives is for the taking.” He explained.

 

“Well that would make sense to keep sensitive knowledge from being easy to find. Anything electronic could be accessed no matter how difficult the encryption is. Infiltrating the Temple would be next to impossible, let alone finding the right book.”

 

“Anyone who believes knowledge can be dangerous is simply foolish! Knowledge is power. It is only dangerous if half the truth is known. At that point, the only rational thing to do is obtain the whole truth; not try to cover up what has already been revealed.” He declared.

 

“There are times when secrets must be kept, or would you disagree?” I said, referring to his little secret that I had kept.

 

“That’s not what I was referring to. Secrets are not in themselves bad; it’s keeping them when things become problematic. However, that’s not all of it.” He went through the pile of books he had collected and leafed through the one he was looking for. “The Council makes an issue about knowledge like it’s a precious thing...” He turned his gaze to Kalin. “..they’re right little one. What they aren’t right about is that knowledge becomes less important as more people know about it.” He handed me the book and gestured me to look through it.

 

I flipped through a few pages and saw that it was a journal from a jedi master. The paper looked ancient and I was tried to be careful, but the book had already started falling apart. I came across some pages written with ink that had significantly faded. There were only a few good words among entire pages that looked like they used to be filled with writing, but were almost completely unreadable. I showed Kalin and then looked at Alek to get an explanation.

 

“That was written by Master Togo almost three hundred years ago. In it was a detailed record of events that lead the Mandalorians to attack a small civilization. Despite being at a severe disadvantage, the Mandalorians withdrew their forces after winning a pyric victory.” He gestured to the book. “The knowledge within this journal might have helped the Council in the war of Exar Kunn, but because they didn’t back it with a digital copy...” He turned his attention back to Kalin. “Roughly forty pages’ worth of entries have been lost into the mists of oblivion. Master Togo’s knowledge during a critical series of events... gone.”

 

She took the book from me. “Why are these pages gone? The first several entries look fine, but suddenly everything has just... vanished.”

 

He shook his head. “No, he just used an ink that couldn’t endure centuries. The first few pages were from a standard pigment. The ink he used on the planet had a radioactive half life of a few years. Because they didn’t scan this into the computer, everything that he had written... all the knowledge that he poured onto these pages... is gone forever. How valuable is it now?”

 

She flipped to one of the first few pages and read through the first entry. Once she was finished skimming through, she delicately closed the book and handed it back to Alek. “Aren’t teachings meant to be handed off from one generation to the next? Would Master Togo have shared his experiences with his padawans?”

 

He took the book and gently set it down. “That maybe so, but as it’s passed from one master to the next, it is forgotten, misunderstood, and loses its original value. I’m afraid that the only way to ensure your legacy survives is to spread your wisdom to as many who are willing to listen. It’s difficult to culminate a library’s worth of knowledge, but it’s easy to lose it all if it is razed to the ground. The way to keep that from happening is to allow access to any who seek to know.”

 

Kalin’s eyes lit up at hearing such words of wisdom. I admit that I was almost enamored, myself. There was, however, something else that I was more interested in. “You see, Kalin? Master Vrook is not the only one who buries himself in the library. Even ones as prestigious as Alek and Revan didn’t get where they are without keeping themselves open to new ideas. Even an expert on the Mandalorians, like Alek, continues expanding his knowledge on that very subject.”

 

He shook his head. “Not really. I already know what I’m looking for, but Revan just needs some references. You’d find that your word mean very little without something solid to back your cause.”

 

I stepped forward and was perplexed by something. “If you’re looking for sources, then why are you looking for them here? There are countless others on the network that would work just as well. That and they would be much easier to...” I paused as I figured out what he was really looking for. “You are using sources that only Jedi can access and many of which no one would actually cross reference! That’s what you’re doing. You’re not interested in any of the content here, only their names and that they’ve written about the Mandalorians.”

 

He gave me an almost humiliated frown, but turned his attention to Kalin. “Please leave us, little one. I have... matters to discuss with Alexandra... alone.”

 

I turned to Kalin and whispered to her, “I’ll be with you in a few minutes. You can log into one of the terminals. I’ll get back to you.”

 

She looked at both of us, anticipating something significant was about to be revealed, but knew Alek wasn’t going to tell her anything about it. After a sigh, she bowed to us and left us alone in the chamber.

 

Alek came and just stared as if to study me. “Did you figure that out just now?”

 

“So it is[i/] true! You are[i/] still trying to deceive people with another elaborate web of lies. As you said earlier, the problem is half the truth... a lie consisting of half the truth is among the darkest.”

 

“Then should I assume you intend to stand with the Council and not Revan?” He asked.

 

“I want no part in what you two are planning. I can’t abide by all this deception. It’s one thing to convince people to act, but it’s quite another to mislead them into believing something that is not true.”

 

Alek leaned back against one of the bookcases. “Alexandra, our battle is not just against the Mandalorians, but against the inefficiencies of democracy. When you’re trying to satisfy everyone, trillions of people, you end up with our own people fighting each other instead of the true enemy. While the Senators bicker amongst themselves, the Republic remains stagnant. The Mandalorians, on the other hand, are able to move in unison and they are marching towards the Republic.” He got closer to me. “The Republic needs to realize the threat and the Order is their only hope. We are the natural leaders of the Republic and we must be the first to oppose the Mandalorians, otherwise, they will continue to bicker over pointless matters while an enemy stands in their doorway.”

 

“You’re not setting a good example by deceiving and misleading the people we’re trying to protect. All that we can do is try to change people’s minds about what to do. If we are right about the Mandalorian threat having to be addressed, then surly we could make a convincing argument. If you have to lie in order to do that, then how can you be so sure of the accusations?”

 

He shook his head. “Alexandra, most people are not as rational as you, me, or Revan. For every intellectual, there are a hundred fools who believe what they want to instead of what is actually there. We live in an age where knowledge and information is easy to find, but just as easily is misinformation being fed to populace. If you tell people what they want to hear, then it doesn’t matter whether it is backed by fact. We are fighting an uphill battle because we are trying to convince trillions of people to accept a harsh truth. Another enemy we face are those who feed lies into the system. Those who stand to benefit from deceit are not bound by the ethics or values that we hold dear. Far too often do the words of a politician outweigh the value of an expert’s on critical matters.”

 

“What matters would these be?”

 

“Most people take their Senator’s words at face value, but they often overlook sound advice from people who have dedicated themselves to their field. The current issue on war should not be decided by the senate, but by seasoned generals who have seen war and have proven their abilities. Anyone trained in the art of manipulation can negate the value of experts... it’s tarnishing the Republic. That’s what we have to fight before we can fight a war!”

 

“If you hate lies and deception so much, then why do you use the same tactics?” I asked.

 

“Because it’s the only way to convince people to act. We tried using ‘conventional’ tactics to the best of our abilities, but we had very little impact because no one believed us. Our convictions were correct, but it was an inconvenient truth that they didn’t want to believe. Sometimes you have to make your message sound extreme, or no one will listen.” He said matter-of-factly.

 

I leaned back against a book case and sighed deeply. “There is logic to what you say, but the Council are not so easy to deceive. You made it sound like you wanted to convince them to act. Do you really think you can do that?”

 

“If enough Jedi within the Order support our goal, the Council would have no choice but to agree. Their power comes from their followers... they would not risk losing it.”

 

I sighed weakly. “It sounds to me that your real target is the Council.”

 

He paced down the isle for a moment before turning back to face me. “Our interest is in the well-being of the Republic, but right now, the Republic is under threat. The best interests of the Republic demand immediate action be taken before the Mandalorians invade. The longer we wait, the less time we will have to make preparations for war.” He got much closer to me and put his face centimeters away from mine. “The thought of deceiving or even defying the Council is as disturbing to me as it is to you, but not as disturbing as the thought of a Mandalorian fleet invading Republic space without opposition. They are the greatest threat we’ve faced in since the war of Exar Kunn, but the Republic had been ready when hostilities broke out. We are vulnerable now, but still have time... time to build up our defenses if we act quickly.”

 

I turned my back to him so that I could be allowed to think as if I were alone. There was something about his reasoning that I didn’t like, but at the same time was exactly what I wanted to hear. He was right about what would happen if the Mandalorians attacked the Republic before they mobilized the fleet to repel the invasion. Although old and obsolete, the Republic ships were at least a means to to resist the threat long enough for new warships to take their place.

 

I also knew exactly what he meant by the inefficiencies of a democracy. The more you try to satisfy the needs or everyone, the more difficult it becomes to make progress. That’s one reason why totalitarianism and fascism have often done well for civilizations in desperate times. With fewer leaders comes less bickering amongst themselves, but it restricts individual liberties that much more.

 

It offends me that certain citizens within the Republic demand more from their government, but are not willing to make the sacrifices that are required. They want more warships and troops protecting their planet, but also demand lower taxes. Where does the funding come from to fuel those ships? How do you provide for those soldiers? Then when they have to cut services in order to pay for that military, the very people who wanted it are the first to complain that there aren’t enough police or qualified teachers.

 

It’s people like that who make me lose confidence in our democracy. If people don’t know what’s best for them, they should not get in the way of those who try to provide for the needs of as many citizens as possible. What Alek said made sense and I felt that I could no longer just sit back and wait for the inevitable to come. As much as I valued the ideals of democracy, I knew that it wasn’t going to save the Republic.

 

After a seemingly eternal moment, I made a choice that would forever change my life. “What would it take to save the Republic?”

[Lance Monance]

Good story. I quite enjoy Malak being intelligent and well spoken for once!

[Darth_Yuthura]

It's been a long while, but here is chapter 8

_____

 

Although Revan and Alek were not members of the Jedi High Council, their names carried almost as much recognition as Master Vandar’s or Kavar’s. It seemed odd that two rogue Jedi would gain so much prestige, but soon came to realize that Revan was a natural leader, not a follower. I found it odd that the best leaders made poor subordinates... I mean why a subordinate follow you if you don’t do the same? Every Republic General and Admiral has had to take orders at one point or another.

 

When I first heard that Revan and Alek had stepped up and demanded that the Council take action against the Mandalorian threat, I just thought they were grandstanding. Before, they just disregarded the Council’s wisdom; this was the first time they directly challenged their authority. At first, I didn’t understand why they tolerated such insubordination, but was quick to realize that they had much support from other Jedi who didn’t agree with the Council.

 

I never wanted to admit it, but my faith in the Council had diminished with each new world along the Outer Rim that had fallen into Mandalorian hands. I thought I was the only one who disagreed with them because everyone else around me trusted in the Council’s wisdom implicitly. I guess I just assumed I had to be the one who was wrong because everyone else came to a different conclusion. It was a classic example of ‘group think.’

 

Group think happened when an individual followed the majority of a group instead of deviating from them. It made sense that when an individual deviated from a group, she would think it was more likely that they knew better. Some people willingly went against their better judgment because they didn’t want to stand alone. I didn’t realize it myself, but I had fallen victim to this very phenomenon.

 

I thought that if I stood alone and everyone else was against me, it would have been rather arrogant of me to believe my voice was more important than a thousand. However, if I had reason to believe I was right, then it was more important to follow my intuition. If I were indeed wrong, then surely the others could convince me otherwise.

 

I intended to take a stand on an issue that I was convinced had to be addressed. War with the Mandalorians was imminent and the Republic had to be ready. Although war was not the Jedi way, it often was inevitable and natural.

 

Like a forest fire, war was destructive, leaving ruin in its wake, but their prevention often only escalated the damage. On my world, we valued nature and thought that we were serving and protecting it by preventing fire from destroying our forests. We didn’t realize it at the time, but fire was in itself a part of nature that we were disrupting. In preventing such fires, we only delayed the inevitable inferno that consumed our largest forest in a single catastrophic event.

 

Although it was not our intent, in preventing purging fires from happening as nature intended, we allowed for an already unstable system to grow even more wild than it was ever intended. There came a point when a forest fire escalated beyond anything we could stop. Nature never intended for a gigantic inferno to spread like a wind of death across the ancient forest.

 

Even decades later, most of the land where lush trees once grew remained barren. Had we left nature alone, it would have continued indefinitely. For some reason, I thought much about that event as I considered the Republic’s future.

 

Like my people, the Republic had been trying to avoid a conflict for two decades, but only delayed the inevitable. I did not want to see the Mandalorians spread across the Republic like another raging inferno through an ancient forest. As I considered the options in front of me, I didn’t know whether to step back and let nature take its course, or if it had already been disturbed and needed to be healed.

 

-----

 

I gave Kalin the rest of the day to herself, despite knowing she would squander it. Although I knew she needed my encouragement, I felt that I needed Master Kavar’s council more. Before the next Council session, I went to his office to receive any words of wisdom he could give me.

 

He could tell that I was troubled. “I take it that this isn’t a social visit.”

 

“I was hoping to get some advice. Right now, I’ve got a crisis and now I must make a choice... all of them bad.”

 

“What’s wrong?”

 

I stared at him for a long moment. “I can’t tell you directly, but I would like to get a sense of what you would do in my situation... how you would make a choice.”

 

He looked at me, puzzled. “If you can’t talk about it, then I don’t know how much help I can be.”

 

“If you’d just listen, that would be enough for me. I guess that I would like to get a sense of what I should do.”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “I’ve got some time. You have my undivided attention.”

 

Usually, Kavar had some form of paperwork and would do while talking to me, so that was a pleasant change from the usual. “Right now, I see a crisis ahead of me and I’m unsure what I should do. I’m not involved... yet, but I know that I will eventually be. There is something I can do to influence the outcome, but it would involve taking measures I don’t think I’m prepared for. If I knew it would work, then I would act without giving it a second thought.”

 

“But if things don’t go as anticipated...”

 

I nodded. “It might make things even worse.” I got up and paced around a few times while I kept explaining. “I have another option, but I don’t agree with it. It seems to be the safest thing to do, but I think it’s a mistake.”

 

“Are you talking about yourself, or do you mean making the right choice for someone else? Is this a life-or-death situation, or what?”

 

I stopped pacing and just stood there with a dumb look on my face. “I really don’t know everything, but there are indisputable certainties that I can’t just ignore. The ‘right’ choice is the one I like least. The most favorable option is not one I think you or the Council would approve of, but I can’t see any other option that would yield a better alternative.”

 

He stood up from his chair, got behind and pulled me around to face him. “Alexandra, what is troubling you? Please tell me.”

 

I stared into his eyes for a long time before I answered. “Master... in all honesty, does the Council have a plan to address the Mandalorian threat?”

 

He leaned back and realized why I was asking. “Alexandra... don’t tell me that you seriously believe what they told you.”

 

“Please answer the question. Do you have a plan?” I demanded.

 

He nodded. “We believe there is more going on than just the Mandalorians. There is another threat that has not revealed itself to us. We are not simply doing nothing... we are biding our time until we can get some clue about this unknown threat.”

 

“I know that already, but what about the current threat? Do you have a plan to address the Mandalorians?”

 

“Yes... but my hands are tied on the issue. Despite my recommendations, the majority of the Council continue to support our neutrality. The Jedi do not support war and would never agree to a military buildup preceding hostilities.”

 

“But if we do nothing, many Republic worlds would be left completely defenseless to a Mandalorian invasion. We can’t let that happen.” I declared.

 

“We are in no position to influence the outcome. I represent only 1/12 of the Council. All I can do is voice my opinion to the Council; they rejected it. Case closed.” He said sternly.

 

“It is not closed. We must go through with it!”

 

He stared at me for a long while, almost disappointed. “You sound like you’ve already made a decision.”

 

“I haven’t... not yet.” I stepped back and tried to come up with the right words, but they didn’t come.

 

Master Kavar came up behind me and gently pulled me around to face him. “Alexandra, you should not burden yourself with issues that you cannot influence. What happens between the Council, the Senate, and the Mandalorians... it is not for you to be concerned about. You should be concentrating on your own life because one day, you’ll be the one making the tough decisions. And when that happens, you’ll understand the weight that comes with such responsibility.”

 

“Master, do you seriously believe that the Republic will act in time before the Mandalorians strike? Even a week of preparation could save millions of lives. If the Mandalorians attack the Republic without opposition, the death toll will be enormous.” He tried to interrupt me, but I kept speaking. “I know the Jedi code, but you know just as well as I do that billions will die if we do nothing.”

 

“Alexandra...” He held onto my shoulders. “You’re so young. And when you’re young, you think that answers are simple to find. Well you’re wrong.” He reached to my belt and took one of my lightsabers and waved it in front of me. “If you think that this is the only answer you’ll find, then I’ve set a poor example for the rest of the Order. Tell me... what is this?”

 

I felt like a child being scolded, but didn’t react. “A lightsaber?”

 

“More basically.”

 

I paused a moment. “A weapon?”

 

“Exactly. And what purpose do weapons ever serve?”

 

I just stared, waiting for his answer.

 

“They cause death and destruction, that is all they can ever bring about. Master Vrook calls it a tool, but he fails to recognize that the symbol of the Jedi is an instrument of death. Do you think that just because I use one of these that I like it?” He placed the lightsaber back into its sheath.

 

I felt like I had just said something very disrespectful, but I had something to say in response to that question. “Well I have a question for you as well: Do you think everyone is rational? Do you think that you can come to a reasonable settlement so that we can all hold hands in peace? Do you think that you could convince the Hutts to give up their criminal activities? Ask Twi’lek males to treat their women with proper respect? Convince Master Vrook that he made a mistake?”

 

He turned away, not amused by the joke.

 

I got in front of him. “Master, not everything can be resolved peacefully. Not everyone is content to just live in harmony. Some want nothing more than to dominate, to conquer, or to destroy everyone else. Violence is all the Mandalorians know and as long as they go unopposed, they’ll just massacre everything in their path.” I gripped his shoulders. “If we don’t stop them, no one else will.”

 

He stared at me for a long while as if to study the resolve within me, the desperation I felt, the fear that was driving me to act. He sighed deeply. “Alexandra, if you want my advice, then here it is: don’t focus your attention on events that you have no control over. There are no Mandalorians in your circle.”

 

-------(Nine years ago)------

 

“This is called a training circle; a master’s wheel. This circle will be your world, your whole life. While you train, there is nothing outside it.” Kavar said as he paced along outside the boarder of the circle on the floor.

 

I stared at the circle, not knowing what to think. “Okay...”

 

He stepped into the circle and noticed my confusion. “Who were you just talking to? I was not a part of your world until I entered the circle. I did not exist and you heard nothing until just now. Do you understand?”

 

I just stared with a blank look on my face.

 

He chuckled at my expense. “Right now, you’re probably thinking ‘Why is he making me do this stupid exercise.’ Aren’t you?”

 

“I... don’t know what you expect me to do. What’s going on?” I asked.

 

He nodded and gestured to the edges of the circle. “I told you that this circle represents everything you are. Until I say otherwise, there is nothing outside of it.”

 

“Okay...”

 

He crossed his arms confidently. “Clearly, you don’t believe what I just told you. You still believe that you are in a city, which is on a planet which is orbiting a star that makes up a galaxy.”

 

“Would you please just tell me what’s going on?” I demanded.

 

“What’s going on is that you are training to become a Jedi. For that to happen, you must clear your mind and thoughts of everything other than your training. That’s all that exists within your circle. Everything else is only a distraction.” He gestured to everything around us. “These buildings that cover the surface of the planet... how do they matter to you? The billions of people you do not know... why do you have them in the back of your mind?”

 

I hesitated to answer. “They don’t exist?”

 

He shook his head almost trying not laugh. “Alright... for a moment, there is no circle. There is an entire galaxy out there and you are but a small thread of its elaborate tapestry.” He stepped back and activated a holo generator that displayed a view of the night’s sky on the dome ceiling. The room went dark and it almost looked like I was staring through an open roof at a starry night.

 

He gestured to the walls. “Let’s start right here. Right now, Master Vash is in the Council chamber waiting for Master Zez Kae El, but he is late and rushing to meet her.” He got behind me and directed my attention to another blank wall and pointed like there was something to look at. “Now let’s look at the life of one person on this world. Beyond that wall is a professor of Geography taking public transportation because his speeder broke down yesterday.”

 

I smiled in amazement. “You can see all that?!”

 

His smile turned to one of pride. “Let’s stay focused here.” He pointed upward. “There are many wonders in the galaxy that would marvel you. Around many of those stars are civilizations, some simple... some you’ll never understand. Entire worlds filled with people like you or me. Trillions of lives as significant as yours. Do you have an idea just how massive the galaxy really is?”

 

I smiled, almost dazzled. “How small we are.”

 

“Yes.” He got in front of me. “Now let’s turn our focus to just one of these worlds...” On the ceiling, one of the stars were highlighted and then the display zoomed in to one of its planets. “This is Dianeb. There are many civilizations inhabiting this world, but one in particular, the Kazden are falling victim to genocide by a more powerful empire.”

 

“Genocide?”

 

“Yes. Millions have already perished and many more will be lost before the end.”

 

I didn’t know how to react. I really wasn’t shocked or anything, but I didn’t want to seem like I didn’t care. Although I knew it was millions who were being murdered, it was not something I would lose any sleep over. “Is there anything that can be done to save them?”

 

“This is not the act of any single person, but of entire nations. These two peoples have been in conflict for hundreds of years. Even if we were to provide aid, neither side would be content to simply coexist. If they were willing to work for a peaceful solution, we might be able to help, but the only resolution for either side would involve destroying or conquering the other.”

 

I looked down, very saddened. “Is there no other way?”

 

“There is no simple solution. It would require each side to abandon generations of hate and mistrust.” He deactivated the holo image and the room went dark for a moment before the lights were back on. Kavar got into the training circle again. “There is a moral to this story; this all began with a single act that occurred almost 600 years ago. A great Kazden king had been assassinated and they believed the Tupilov were the ones responsible.”

 

“But they weren’t?” I said almost factually.

 

He shook his head. “But they weren’t aware of it at the time and when the king’s son inherited the throne, he immediately declared war on the Tupilov. A few years later, it was made known that it was he who killed his own father. By the time the truth was discovered, war had already caused much destruction on both sides. That being known, the Kazden withdrew their forces and even provided the Tupilov with the resources they needed for their reconstruction. In addition, they handed over the one responsible for trial.”

 

“What went wrong?”

 

He shrugged his shoulders. “Nothing. The Kazden went to great lengths to heal the wound that their leader had caused, but the Tupilov were still enraged that they had been attacked in the first place. Despite what they received from the Kazden, their anger did not die there. The Kazden believed the Tupilov were ungrateful for the retribution they were provided. It kept escalating as each side committed acts of violence in response to the other. The millions of deaths that have been caused since then were a result of a war that took place 600 years ago.”

 

I nodded in compliance, but didn’t know where he was going with this. The last thing I wanted to do was appear clueless in front of a master so early in my training. It was better to pretend like I understood than to not react one way or another. People liked being acknowledged, so I just went with the flow. The only problem there was when I had to demonstrate what I understood. He asked, “So Alexandra, what is the moral of this story?”

 

I was tripped up by that, but tried to come up with an answer. “People fight for the wrong reasons?”

 

“That’s part of it, but there’s an even broader issue I want you to consider. When the Tupilov were attacked, they became so obsessed with revenge that they retaliated and started a trend of anger and hate where every ill turn deserved another and another. For 600 years, their hostilities escalated and each retaliation caused another act of aggression. It creates a cycle of anger and hate that is self-perpetuated. The only way to disrupt that cycle is through peace.” Master Kavar got on a knee to be at eye level with me. “That is what it means to be a Jedi. It is up to us to disrupt that cycle, or it will continue indefinitely.”

 

--------

 

I don’t know why, but I remembered that session with Master Kavar vividly. Although he was never my dedicated master, he had taught me on many occasions. Ever since he became a member of the High Council, he found it difficult to find time for teaching one-on-one. He did teach, but only for the most advanced lightsaber techniques. The more basic forms for sentinels and councilors were handled by other masters who weren’t as... talented as Kavar. Few other than guardians learn Sai cha, Velocities, or Lus-ma. I think that was one of the reasons I wanted to be a guardian, but abandoned it when I learned it wasn’t a prerequisite. In the end I never did take any of those classes, Master Kavar taught them to me directly.

 

Although he was never my Master, he sort of took me under his wing. Whenever he had time to spare, he and I often sparred, discussed history, and other things. At first, I was always the one listening as he lectured to me, but after a while, I began adding and discussing the subjects with him. As the years went by, I began thinking of him less as ‘master’ and more as a friend. I had wondered if and why that made any difference, but when he spoke to me like that, I understood what had changed.

 

Those words were like a slap in my face. It was almost as though he still thought of me as that child instead of an adult. “I think I am quite capable of choosing who I allow into my circle.”

 

“Well when I hear you speak like that, I don’t think I could call myself your friend if I remained silent.”

 

“I don’t think you could call yourself a friend to the Order when you remain silent in the Council chamber. Don’t tell me that you don’t have reservations for the Council’s choice.”

 

“This is not the time to start grandstanding. Either we all walk together, or together we must stay where we are. The last thing we need is a rogue Jedi further segregating the Order.”

 

I had to come up with something that would have demonstrated that I was right. “Do you remember that Gran who was on trial for mass-murder a few months ago?”

 

“How could I forget? It was deadlocked by his accusation of the captain. Why do you ask?”

 

I was about to bring up a very unusual situation when 300 people were killed when a hatch failed to seal properly. An entire compartment had been losing pressure long before the ship was in space. The Gran had noticed when the ship was only 5000 meters in altitude, but didn’t alert his captain because of a cultural conflict. Gran have a system where subordinates do not question their superiors, assuming they must have been the ones making the mistake. That could have been avoided had the captain taken the time to know the cultural differences of Gran from humans.

 

He claimed that he was waiting for his commanding officer to conclude a personal conversation with the first officer before he could bring anything to the captain’s attention. In his culture, it was standard for officers to take priority in accordance to rank. It was not recklessness, negligence, or a deliberate act, but a cultural discrepancy. I’ve often wondered what the verdict would have been, but one of the family of a victim had murdered the Gran before the trial began.

 

“You remember what he did and why he did it?”

 

He nodded. “He should have known enough to realize that if people’s lives were at risk, they take priority over anything else.”

 

I shook my head. “It was a cultural conflict that caused that accident. That Gran did not trust himself enough to believe anything was wrong. He assumed that if that compartment was losing pressure, the captain or first officer would have been aware of it. He trusted in them more than he did his own good judgment... and 300 people died because of it.”

 

He sighed as if tired of hearing me trying to persuade him to go against the Council’s judgment. “This isn’t like that at all. The Council members had proven themselves trustworthy many times and they haven’t let us down yet.”

 

I displayed a distressed expression. “There’s a first time for everything.”

 

He sighed again and turned away to leave. The Council had a session in a few minutes, so he was likely going there, but for the purpose of ending the conversation.

 

“Master, what does the Council intend to do? I think we all at least deserve an explanation.”

 

He turned back to face me before he was out the door. “I’m sworn to secrecy. I will not tell you any more than they have, so don’t ask again.”

 

“Revan has a solution for the Mandalorian threat. What does the Council have in mind?” I said sardonically.

 

He gave me a look that I’ve never seen before. It was almost like every gesture that could express anger was being displayed at once... everything except shouting. When I said that name, I didn’t know whether his rage was directed at me, or at Revan. Either way, I was afraid. For one so controlled as Kavar to be filled with such rage, I was afraid for my life when he closed the door. I actually had my left hand over one of the lightsabers.

 

It hadn’t felt that much fear since the time when I was on a ship and heard deafening emergency sirens suddenly go silent. It meant that whatever warning they were alerting us to had already happened. Kavar’s silence was much like that. When he finally spoke, his voice was so soft, yet it frightened me more than if he were shouting. “Don’t... say that. Don’t you say that.”

 

“Master, I’ve spoken to many others and only a quarter of all the Jedi support the Council’s decision. Half said they would follow the will of the Council. What they really meant was that they were either too reluctant to say it, or they would follow the Council... whatever they decide.”

 

His anger was turning to concern. “Stay out of this. For the love of god, don’t get involved.”

 

I shook my head. “I’m sorry Master. The Council has been given all the time they could afford. Action must be taken... now.”

 

“How can you possibly[i/] think you can trust Revan more than the Council? How can you support someone who doesn’t obey orders?!” He shouted.

 

I kept a normal voice. “I’m trusting my own good judgment. In this case, I have more reason to believe Revan has a solution than the Council on this issue.” I held onto his shoulders. “Master, what do you[i/] think should be done?”

 

He brushed me off and went for the door without looking back. I don’t know why, but when he just walked off like that, it was like he was too disgusted with that he couldn’t even look at me. I hated the feeling, but I needed to show him the reality of the situation. He was so afraid of making a mistake that he wouldn’t stand up to the Council. He should have known that it was better to make a mistake than to take no action. I only hoped that he would see that before it was too late.

[Chevron 7 locke]

Another great chaper Darth_Yuthura. i liked the way you left the chapter off. it really adds some suspense to the story

[Darth_Yuthura]

Alright, I'm in something of a deadlock right now. I would really like some advice from loyal readers. Right now, I have a number of potential outcomes that may come from this. I was thinking that either Revan and Malak would have something even more devious in mind than they admitted to Alexandra, or the Council will not go on with their plan... leading to them abandoning the Jedi(and their plan worked perfectly). This story is going to be more likely to have the Dark Revan as opposed to the Heroic Revan Kreia made him out to be.

 

For not spoiling anything else, I do have an idea behind the deception idea, but I could see either scenario work out. If there are any suggestions or ideas, I'm open to them because I really need to know where I should lead this from here. Thanks.

[HIGH ON PIE 14]

Another great chaper Darth_Yuthura. i liked the way you left the chapter off. it really adds some suspense to the story

 

Indeed. The exiles thought process is interesting to see.

 

Hmmm...I will have to brainstorm my mind for ideas though.

 

Happy writing DY!

 

~HOP