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NSW: Tysy's Cheesy Chess Songs!


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(NOTE to machievelli: You only have to read this thread series once, and review it once. After that, you can release yourself from the infernal torture...)

 

Author's Note: If you're like me, and not like Bobby Fischer or Garry Kasparov, you love a lot of mnemonic devices, like songs and ditties, to help you remember the fundamentals of chess. Thus, I present Tysy's Cheesy Chess Songs, to the tune of popular kids' and adults' songs...

 

TYSY'S CHEESY CHESS SONGS

Lyrics by Tysyacha, original tunes by the original artists

 

THE PIECES ON THE BOARD

Sung to the tune of "The Wheels on the Bus"

 

The pieces on the board move different ways,

Different ways, different ways!

The pieces on the board move different ways,

All through the game!

 

The Rooks on the board go up and down,

Plus they go right and left.

The Rooks on the board move these four ways,

All through the game!

 

The Knights on the board go "step, step, side,"

Like an "L"--"step, step, side."

They jump over other pieces, too,

All through the game!

 

The Bishops on the board go on the "slant",

Either the light or dark.

The Bishops on the board go on the "slant",

All through the game!

 

The King on the board--one square per turn,

In any direction.

Now, DON'T lose your King, or it's CHECKMATE--

End of the game!

 

The Queen on the board goes EVERYWHERE,

Unless YOUR pieces are in HER way!

White Queen goes on white, Black Queen on black,

All through the game!

 

The Pawns on the board go straight ahead,

Just one square at a time,

But they capture pieces on the "slant"--

All through the game!

 

The pieces on the board move here and there.

Don't move them just anywhere!

The pieces on the board move different ways,

All through the game!

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Responding to fan demand for more cheesy chess songs, here is another! :p

 

THERE ARE SIXTY-FOUR

Lyrics by Tysyacha, original lyrics and music by the Beatles

 

On a chessboard, there are how many squares?

Don't answer me now!

If it turns out you don't know, well, that's just fine--

I'll get to the answer in time!

If you want to know, please listen to me.

This fact's not a chore...

 

Thirty-two dark squares, thirty-two light squares:

There are sixty-four!

 

Here are more things, too,

About the chessboard which

Are some hot tips for you!

 

Vertical columns, those are called "files",

Going up and down.

Each file has a letter, yes, from A to H.

Easy-peasy! It's all the rage!

Now, what we call "rows"--in chess, they're called "ranks",

One to eight, for sure...

 

Thirty-two dark squares, thirty-two light squares:

There are sixty-four!

 

Every chess game, make sure that you're careful

Setting up the board. Confused? Well, have no fear!

We shall see what's right...

You do need a light square

In the lower right!

 

No matter now, if you're Black or White!

From your point of view,

Indicate precisely all the moves you make

And chess will be a piece of cake!

Here is the answer to the question

That I asked before:

 

"Thirty-two dark squares, thirty two light squares:

There are sixty-four!"

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