Ansible Posted July 16, 2002 Share Posted July 16, 2002 Ever Wonder: Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"? Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it? Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes? Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections? You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff? Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together? If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress? If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mercen4ry Posted July 16, 2002 Share Posted July 16, 2002 Some of those are great, although others I actually found myself answering. And, in the spirit of Merc tack-on posts, let me add a few of my own: (drawing from your other post) Why they package hotdogs in groups of 10 and buns in groups of 8. Why we always go to the movies and get the "Student Discount," yet always complain that general education never does anything for us. Why "Greenland" is a frozen icicle most of the year, and "Iceland" is usually a mild 65 degrees? Why we go to the market and call it the "Grocery Store" (Ack, that's gross ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zindell Posted July 16, 2002 Share Posted July 16, 2002 ALthough I had heard most of those before some were quite original. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Koffin Posted July 16, 2002 Share Posted July 16, 2002 Why do the buttons have brail on drive through ATM machines? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hanch Saode Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 Thank you...you just made my brain explode Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leXX Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 needed a giggle, cheers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
obi Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 WHy do you drive in a parkway and park in a driveway? Why if it's on a ship, it's called cargo, but in a car, it's a shipment? Why do they call it a "T.V set" when you only get one? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Knight Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 ha ha ha :laugh6: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MotionMan Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 Very funny. Your getting these off a site me thinks:) Cause I seen those in the humor sites. Very funny non-the-less. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mercen4ry Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 Nah, the ones I write are off the top of my head... which goes to show that my personal jokes ain't that great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
-[MotU]-Lyger|=- Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 Originally posted by Ansible Ever Wonder: 1. Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? 2. Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? 3. Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? 4. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons? 5. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? 6. Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour? 7. You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff? 8. Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food? 9. Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"? 10. If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal? I quoted some of your questions and decided to answer them: 1. Psychics arent Psychic, they're just bullsh-t 2. cause how else would they spell it? 3. Doctors practice cause they are not Masters. + not all doctors practice 4. Cause its Juice, not lemonade. and cause its real powerful against jerms and such 5. They are called Brokers cause they make you broker then you already were 6. its called rush hour cause everyone is in a rush to get home, and thanks to Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan 7. Because in order for the plain to fly it needs to be made out of light meterial, if plains were made out of that black box crap they would crash after getting 20 ft off the ground 8. Because that would be cruelty to animals, + not all cats like to eat mices 9. cause 'start' is where 'shut down' is 10. because flying isnt safe, you're taking a risk going in the air. see somethings have answers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
acdcfanbill Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 you dont need to go to the start button to shut it down, if all windows are closed hit alt+F4... or with winXP just his teh power button and it will automatically shut down for you.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Divine Spirit Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 Originally posted by Ansible Ever Wonder: Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"? because it is the beginning of the end! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyth'emos Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 Originally posted by -=|Lyger|=- I quoted some of your questions and decided to answer them: 1. Psychics arent Psychic, they're just bullsh-t 2. cause how else would they spell it? 3. Doctors practice cause they are not Masters. + not all doctors practice 4. Cause its Juice, not lemonade. and cause its real powerful against jerms and such 5. They are called Brokers cause they make you broker then you already were 6. its called rush hour cause everyone is in a rush to get home, and thanks to Chris Tucker and Jackie Chan 7. Because in order for the plain to fly it needs to be made out of light meterial, if plains were made out of that black box crap they would crash after getting 20 ft off the ground 8. Because that would be cruelty to animals, + not all cats like to eat mices 9. cause 'start' is where 'shut down' is 10. because flying isnt safe, you're taking a risk going in the air. see somethings have answers Dude thats not the point, lighten up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MotionMan Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 What color would a smurf turn if you choke it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marvelous* Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 Why do the buttons have brail on drive through ATM machines? thats possibly the funniest thing ive heard, ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SharaFett Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 5. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? -need i say more? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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