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send in the clones


whitedragon

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at the request of Zbomber i have made a epII movie spoof. itll take you awhile but enjoy

 

 

 

 

"send in the clones" a white dragon movie spoof

 

*man i hate the prologe so let get on with it*

 

captian typho: ha ha ha ha i guess there was no danger after all.

 

*ship explodes*

 

captian typho: oh damn

 

corde: CROKE

 

padme: man those assasins are stupid. i look nothing like her

 

*the jedi see the not so obviously evil chanselor palpatien*

 

palpatien: my nagotiations will not fail

 

mace windu: well what if they do

 

palpatien: they wont

 

mace windu: but they mite

 

palpatien: master yoda.

 

*they see yoda sleeping*

 

palpatien: hello?

 

yoda: help you i will *snore*

 

*mace windu smacks yoda to wake him up*

 

yoda: uh yeah the dark side clouds everything

 

*padme walks in*

 

yoda: senator amidala seeing you alive brings warm feelings to my heart and so dose seeing you in that dress

 

pademe: uhh thanks. do you have any idea whos behind this attack

 

mace windu: our intelegence points to those mutha ****** disgruntled spice miners

 

padme: thats pretty bad intelegence. but at least it wasent attacking clones

 

palpatien: ill have obi-wan and anakin protect you so we can move the plot alonge

 

*obi-wan and anakin are introduced*

 

obi-wan: i hope we dont get stuck in the elevator like last time

 

anakin: calm deep breaths whew.

 

obi-wan: calm down

 

*they meet jar jar (much to their disgust)*

 

jar jar: OBI MEESA SO SMILING TO SEE YOUSA

 

obi-wan: AHHHH ITS THAT THING AGAIN

 

*obi-wan and anakin egnite their lightsabers*

 

anakin: BACK! GET BACK!

 

padme: what was palpatien thinking

 

obi-wan: well were here

 

padme:well thats nice but i have to get going there are alot of...things to do..yeah things

 

anakin: well youve uh grown more uh pretty

 

*padme leaves the room*

 

anakin: damn why did i say pretty

 

*later that evening*

 

obi-wan: why did she cover the cameras

 

anakin: well i uh

 

obi-wan: wait i sense something..something creepy is in her chamber

 

anakin: hey r2 mite take that personally

 

*they run in and kill the creepy things. then obi hitches a ride with the assassin droid*

 

obi-wan: weeeeee

 

*anakin gets a speeder*

 

zam: oh great the dumb droid picked up another jedi

 

*zam shoots the droid*

 

obi-wan: oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear, oh dear,

 

*anakin catched obi*

 

obi-wan: what took you so long

 

anakin: well i had to get a coke for the road

 

obi-wan: well while were out we can get me one. look a bar is right down there

 

*several hours later*

 

anakin: do you think that we should go after that assassin

 

obi-wan: what assassin

 

anakin: the one who tryed to kill the senator

 

obi-wan: oh yeah that one. well im sure she will turn up soon

 

zam: damn those jedi are good. i cant even see them. ide better hide in that bar

 

*zam walks in the bar*

 

obi-wan: do you see the power of coencedence my padawan. you go act like your looking for her and ill get another scotch

 

elan sleezbagano: want to buy some death sticks

 

obi-wan: do i look like i want to buy some death sticks

 

elan sleezbagano: well...

 

obi-wan: you dont even try and spice them up by calling them something like happy sticks

 

elan sleezbagano: er..

 

obi-wan: listen im a jedi and i can easly trick you into stop selling these things

 

elan sleezbagano: um

 

obi-wan: or i could kill you with my lightsaber

 

elan sleezbagano: i think ill go home and rethink my life

 

obi-wan: yeah get out of here ya fricken star trek extra

 

*zam gets her hand choped off*

 

anakin: well i guess we should interogate her

 

obi-wan: well if we have to. ill be good cop you be bad cop

 

*they take her outside*

 

anakin: wait i think ill be good cop

 

obi-wan: we shall not go through this excersise again. i make a better good cop

 

anakin: yeah but your always good cop

 

obi-wan: no im not you were good cop last time

 

anakin: no i wasent i was sarcastic cop and you were...

 

*jango shoots zam*

 

obi-wan: DAMMIT WE DIDENT EVEN START INTEROGATEING YET

 

jango: SORRY MY FAULT

 

anakin: ooh look a sharp thingy

 

*jedi councel*

 

yoda: track down this bounty hunter you must obi-wan

 

obi-wan: what about senator amidala

 

yoda: handle that your padawan will

 

anakin: HOORA

 

yoda: keep it in your pants you must

 

anakin: yes master but she mite not want to go

 

mace windu: well that not so obviously evil mutha ****** mite help

 

anakin: do you uh mean palpatien

 

mace windu: yeah that mutha ******

 

anakin: why the sudden bad language

 

mace windu: havent you seen shaft mutha *****

 

*anakin sees palpatien*

 

palpatien: do you like the idea of the dark side. you get many benefits as well as 15 dollors an hour

 

anakin: ill research

 

*padme gives jar jar her position*

 

padme: dont screw up

 

jar jar: okeday

 

padme: and for chris sakes get a fricken speach therepist

 

anakin: wow your suitcase technology is far more advanced than tatooines

 

padme: dont look at me that way

 

anakin: why not

 

padme: you look stupid

 

anakin: oh sorry

 

*they start their journy to naboo and obi goes to dex*

 

robot waitress: yo fatso someone is here

 

dex: obi-wan take a seat

 

robot waitress: you want a cup of jawa juice

 

obi-wan: is it made from real jawas

 

robot waitress: i try to be nice

 

dex: what do you want

 

obi-wan: i have a sharp thingy here and i need you to tell me what it...oh i forgot my lines

 

dex: oh i havent seen one of these sence i was prospectin on subterrel *in a booming voice* BEOND THE OUTER RIM

 

obi-wan: and

 

dex: oh and it belongs to kamino

 

obi-wan: ok bye

 

*obi runs out the door. he then goes to the jedi archives*

 

old lady with chopsticks in her hair: are you haveing a problem master kenobi

 

obi-wan: yeah where is kamino

 

old lady with chopsticks in her hair: it was era_ uh it dosent exist

 

obi-wan: well that stinks

 

*anakin and padme are haveing a eventful time*

 

cooking droid: hey you no droids

 

r2: screw you

 

cooking droid: well i never

 

r2: here you are you stupid humans

 

padme: im really glad that we dont under stand a damn word hes saying

 

anakin: why did you change your cloths

 

padme: well i have so much i like to change every hour or so

 

anakin: well whatever makes your boat float

 

padme: youve changed so much

 

anakin: your exactly the way i remember you in my dream

 

padme: thats a little creepy

 

r2: ha ha dumbass

 

*yoda teaches the younglings*

 

yoda: michal, straight get your stance. zeebob, when hold your lightsaber extend your pinky you must

 

obi-wan: am i desterbing

 

yoda: yes!

 

obi-wan: no i ment am i desterbing your class

 

yoda: oh well no i guess not

 

obi-wan: i lost a planet

 

yoda: did you check your wallet

 

obi-wan: yes i checked everywhere even the cookie jar

 

liam: well mabey a dark jedi came here erased it from the archive to mask the clone army that hes building to destroy the republic

 

yoda: shut up liam

 

liam: sorry master

 

*now the most boreing part in the movie happen*

 

all: *SNORE*

 

*obi-wan goes to kamino*

 

taun we: hello master jedi

 

obi-wan: jedi master please

 

taun we: we are expecting you

 

obi-wan: well im glad of that now if you will just lead me to the beer ill be out of your way.

 

taun we: we dont have beer

 

obi-wan: NOOOOOOOOOO....oh well at least ill finish my mission then get some beer at coruscant

 

*taun we shows obi-wan the prime minister*

 

lama su: we are on schedule

 

obi-wan: im getting goose bumps. for what

 

lama su: the clones you orderd

 

obi-wan: clones..do they..attack

 

lama su: no these are non attacking clones.

 

obi-wan: well thats good to hear

 

*we go to naboo where padme has changed her cloths again*

 

anakin: i like it here its smooth just like you

 

*they kiss*

 

padme: no i shouldent have done that

 

anakin: YES YES YES 3rd base

 

*lama su takes obi-wan for the tour*

 

lama su: well that was the bathroom and here are the clones

 

obi-wan: my goodness they look like their going to attack

 

lama su: well they wont unless you want them to.

 

obi-wan: well whats the big guns for.

 

lama su: in case your gardener goes crasy

 

*i cant seem to find much to make fun of in the next scean so ill skip it*

 

taun we: boba is your father here

 

boba: yup..........

 

taun we:..........

 

obi-wan:...........*ehem*

 

taun we: may we see him

 

boba: sure. dad the woman with the crasy neck is here

 

taun we: jango welcome back. this is obi-wan kenobi hes come to snoop

 

obi-wan: your clones are very impressive. you must be very proud. man thats alot of kids

 

jango: im just a simpelton trying to make his way in the universe. did is say simpleton i ment simple man

 

*anakin cuts padmes fruit with the force*

 

anakin: if obi-wan saw me doing this hed be very grumpy

 

padme: why your just cutting fruit

 

anakin: well i like to make up stuff to get mad at him

 

*anakin and padme talk later that nite*

 

anakin: when do we go home

 

padme: in your dreams

 

anakin: but we got to third base just a few hours ago and you change dresses only 5 times

 

padme: things will get complecated.

 

anakin: damn this jedi coad

 

*taun we and obi-wan say there good byes*

 

taun we: yall come back now ya hear

 

obi-wan: r4 get the short guy on the phone

 

r4: yeah yeah alright

 

obi-wan: yo guys teh $#!+ just hit the fan. weve got non attacking clones and bounty hunters and dead jedi and crasy neck people

 

mace windu: do you think those mutha ****** cloners are the mutha ****** assassins were looking for

 

obi-wan: no their all kindof dumb

 

mace windu: you bring that mutha ****** bounty hunter back here

 

obi-wan: no prob bob

 

*anakin dreams*

 

anakin: no mom no no no no

 

*padme bangs on the door*

 

padme: shut up im trying to sleep

 

anakin: i need to go back to tatooine

 

padme: not there again

 

*obi tryes to take jango in and dosent quite get it so in goes the tracking signal*

 

*mean while not more than 100,000,000 swallows flights away*

 

anakin: yo smelly where is my mom

 

watto: i sold her for some car magazines. dont hurt me

 

anakin: well point me in the right directon

 

watto: lars is his name and he married her

 

anakin: oh boy now i have a dad

 

*obi follows jango*

 

boba: dad i think were being tracked

 

jango: no thats why that ship has been following us

 

boba: deploy the seismic charges

 

jango: i know what to do

 

*now comes the coolest sound effect in the movie*

 

seismic charge: silence BWAAAAWOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

obi-wan: blast this is why i hate flying

 

r4: for a jedi you do alot of hateing

 

obi-wan: shut up r4

 

*anakin and padme go to the lars moisture farm*

 

3po: hello marster ani

 

padme: its that gay droid you built

 

anakin: he is not gay. i just programed him to talk like a fag

 

padme: why

 

anakin: one of my friends dared me to do it

 

3po: perhaps we had better go indoors

 

owin: oh god my step brothers a jedi

 

cliegg: hi im cliegg

 

anakin: ha dad you sure have a stupid name. wheres my mom

 

cliegg: dead

 

anakin: well that sucks

 

beru: ill pour you some blue milk

 

anakin: no i think ill find my mother. she well have to be alive for atleast 5 minuts before she dies

 

*anakin goes off on his adventure. and obi-wan gets into geonosis*

 

nute: where is the senetors head

 

dooku: it will be on your desk by thursday or friday

 

funkey robot dude: with these new battle droids well have the finest army in the galaxy

 

dooku: only attacking clones will stop us now

 

obi-wan: damn where am i going to get some attacking clones

 

*anakin finds the tuskin raider camp and finds his mom really torn up*

 

shmi: ani?

 

anakin: yes mom

 

shmi: ani?

 

anakin: im here

 

shmi: ani?

 

anakin: yes its me

 

shmi: ani?

 

anakin: ok this is getting annoying

 

shmi: croke

 

anakin: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

tuskin raider: now ya done it, now hes pissed

 

*yoda is meditating*

 

yoda: oh man is anakin PO'D

 

*obi-wan is haveing radar trouble*

 

obi-wan: DAMN WINDOWS ME! i knew i should have upgraded to xp

 

*r2 also has trouble getting obi's signal*

 

r2: DAMN WINDOWS 98!

 

*anakin burys his mom*

 

anakin: good bye mom

 

voice from bhind the grave: good bye

 

padme: DAMMIT R2 GET OUT FROM BEHIND THERE

 

r2: oh yeah obi-wan wanted to talk to you so i put him on hold

 

*they see obi danceing to the hold buttion music*

 

obi-wan: is this thing on. oh...ive got to geonosis and count dooku is the head of this thing. oh damn another droid

 

mace windu: we are gonna kick that mutha ******* ass so you stay there anakin

 

padme: well were gonna disobey you anyways

 

mace windu: good point we'll meet you there

 

*senetors, jedi and jar jar have a conference*

 

funkey blue guy: this is a chrisis we need the not so obviously evil guy to take control

 

palpatien: but which senator would be so brave or so stupid that he..

 

jar jar: meesa do it! meesa do it!

 

palpatien: anyone else

 

*obi is captured*

 

obi-wan: saruman!

 

dooku: wrongo

 

obi-wan: well whoever you tell me where fett is

 

dooku: nevermind that. come with me and we shall destroy the sith

 

obi-wan: i thought you were a sith

 

dooku: mind your own busness

 

*jar jar makes his speach*

 

jar jar: yes my good senetors i beleave that these sepratists are a threat to everyone so i think i would be best to give the power to the chanselor

 

mace windu: that mutha ****** got a damn good speach therapist

 

plapatien: it is with great greed that i have agreed to this calling. i will lay down this power after i am dead. now i shall make a grand army of attacking clones

 

yoda: stay with his lines he did not

 

*anakin and padme*

 

padme: look some steam

 

anakin: ill run into it

 

padme: try not to kill anyone

 

anakin: damn

 

r2: hey fag lets go

 

3po: my obtuce little friend...

 

r2: NEVER CALL ME OBTUCE

 

*they walk out side and to a door*

 

padme: it wont open

 

anakin: mabey if i touch it

 

*the door opens*

 

anakin: i knew it i have the magic touch

 

padme: shut up and get inside

 

*they find the geonosians*

 

anakin: woohoo more stuff to kill

 

padme: *sigh*

 

*r2 and 3po find them as well*

 

3po: oh my! oh my! what did i do to deserve this

 

r2: your a fag

 

3po: shut up r2

 

*they all get captured*

 

padme: wow you sure screwed up this time

 

anakin: shut up your screwing up the love scene

 

padme: i cant beleave you just said that

 

anakin: well its true. you dont stop talking and your acting is bad

 

padme: my acting is bad!? your the one who_

 

obi-wan: SHUT UP

 

geonosian dude: <let the exacutions begin>

 

anakin: i have a bad feeling about this

 

obi-wan: oh really and i thought those monsters were comeing out here to play catch

 

*they escape and the droids are set loose upon them*

 

mace windu: this mutha ****** party is over

 

dooku: WHATCH YOUR MOUTH

 

mace windu: sorry

 

dooku: thats ok have a cigar

 

jango: need a light

 

*jango burns up maces roab and the battle begins*

 

jango: oops i forgot to take it off flame thrower mode

 

*the battle begins and sence i cant think of much of anything funney to say for this cool battle i guess ill skip it*

 

dooku: you have fought patheticly now bye bye

 

padme: look

 

yoda: YEEEEE HAWWWWW

 

obi-wan: not him again

 

dooku: oh $#!+ attacking clones

 

yoda: clones attack

 

clone commander: yessum sir

 

yoda: oh yeah and pick up the survivors

 

*they get picked up and follow dooku but padme falls out the ship*

 

anakin: NO NO NO NO NO WE NEED TO GO BACK NOW!!!!

 

obi-wan: dude she only droped 5 feet

 

anakin: oh nevermind then

 

*they get to dookus lair and anakin gets zaped by overconfidently running forward*

 

obi-wan: awww damn

 

dooku: back down

 

obi-wan: i dont think so you lightening whore

 

dooku: what

 

obi-wan: its ownage time

 

dooku: i have no idea what your saying

 

obi-wan: stfu

 

dooku: ok im tierd of this

 

*obi gets stabed through the leg*

 

anakin: ok dooku its ownage time again

 

dooku: look over there

 

anakin: what am i...hey a quarter

 

*dooku misses anakins head when anakin found the quarter*

 

dooku: look over there again

 

*dooku accently gets anakins arm instead. "dont ask me why" suddenly yoda walks in*

 

yoda: strong you have become dooku. pull a gandalf on me you will not

 

dooku: yeah yoda its uh ownage time

 

yoda: IT5 owN493 tIM3 F0R J00 DOoKU 1m A l33t H4X0R

 

dooku: huh

 

yoda: let get it on

 

*yoda kick dookus ass and barely manages to escape. dooku goes to coruscant*

 

dooku: DAR+H $1DI0us 1 Jus+ G0+ 0WnzORED bY yoD@

 

sidious: i beg your pardon

 

*mace, obi, and yoda are talking*

 

obi-wan: i have to say that without the clones it wouldent have been a victory

 

yoda: victory you say? not victory. the shround of the has fallen. begun the clone war has

 

*yoda farts*

 

yoda: oops did that ruin the dramitic moment

 

 

 

 

THE END

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Originally posted by Clemme w/Stick

:rofl:

 

That was great, even thoug I dint finish it. I got to where anakin and padme go on their jorney.

 

I like the Mace you've created!! I will read it someday, when I have the time.

 

*Wishes for a Flash Spoof of ep 2, made by Whitedragon*

 

-Clemme

i wish i knew how to do flash but im too computer illiterate

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Haha, i actuallly read all of that. it was good :)

Hehe - For a jedi you do alot of hating..... Shutup R4!

 

Try not to kill anyone anakin:damn

 

padme: it's that gay robot you created Anakin: he's not gay i just prgrammed him to speak like that Padme: Why Anakin : my firend dared me :D

 

*they meet jar jar (much to their disgust)*

 

jar jar: OBI MEESA SO SMILING TO SEE YOUSA

 

obi-wan: AHHHH ITS THAT THING AGAIN

 

*obi-wan and anakin egnite their lightsabers*

 

anakin: BACK! GET BACK!

 

 

 

ah classic.

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hahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahah

 

omg that was the funniest thing I have read in a long time... keep up the good work

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Originally posted by Agen_Terminator

Haha, i actuallly read all of that. it was good :)

Hehe - For a jedi you do alot of hating..... Shutup R4!

 

Try not to kill anyone anakin:damn

 

padme: it's that gay robot you created Anakin: he's not gay i just prgrammed him to speak like that Padme: Why Anakin : my firend dared me :D

 

*they meet jar jar (much to their disgust)*

 

jar jar: OBI MEESA SO SMILING TO SEE YOUSA

 

obi-wan: AHHHH ITS THAT THING AGAIN

 

*obi-wan and anakin egnite their lightsabers*

 

anakin: BACK! GET BACK!

 

 

 

ah classic.

thanks alot. and i owe it all to the epII dvd which i watched while i wrote the spoof

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Originally posted by Hyperglide

One word Whitedragon: Spellcheck.

 

I like the Mace Windu part where u said he was shaft that's the only part I really laughed at it was good.

 

I pray that you were joking. :mad: He might have written it in a rush and thats why some spelling is bad... and the whole thing was funny jeez :)

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