Anakin Skywalker Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 This is not a copy of Master Jimmy's Remaster: The Reign of Darth Vader This is a fic I have worked on since last year, but I am starting over, so the first few chapters will be short btw I'm only putting this on here at Lord Sion's recommendation STAR WARS The New Emperor Anakin Skywalker is no more..... consumed by the Darkside and has become Darth Vader. He just finished his duel with Obi-wan, in which he killed Obi-wan. He slowly walked to wear his master, Darth Sidious was... "You have done well my apprentice, now there are none to oppose us!" Sidious said, and held out a new Blood Red lightsaber. Anakin took it, activated it, and shoved it into Sidious' stomach. Sidious fell, and the Clone Troopers raised their guns. "NO! The Galaxy belongs to me!" Anakin yelled. The Clone troopers looked at each other for a minute, and shrugged and put down their guns. Artoo came up and hit Anakin on the leg. Anakin looked down and saw Artoo, begging him to go help Padme. The entire Empire fleet went to Polis Masa, and waited until Padme delivered her kids, before opening fire on everything and taking control of the Planet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anakin Skywalker Posted January 1, 2007 Author Share Posted January 1, 2007 Chapter 1 Anakin and Padme, who had just recently fallen due to her beloved husband, sat at their throne awaiting there children, Luke and Leia. Emperor and Empress Skywalker heard the hum of a lightsaber behind them... Padme who had just recently been trained in the ways of the Dark Jedi also, activated her blood red lightsaber. Master Yoda came out of the shadows. "The Darkside I sense in you Anakin..." Yoda said. "Ahh.... Master Yoda, I wondered when you were going to try and find me." Anakin said. Padme then activated a second end of her lightsaber. This shocked Yoda, who took a few steps back. "Trained in the arts of the Darkside have you? By Vader, no doubt." Yoda said. Padme just stood there and raised her lightsaber, and quickly chopped off the old Master's head. "Very good!" Anakin said to Padme, before he kissed her lightly. "Thank you Anakin...." Padme said. "Ahhh..... here come's the kids." Luke and Leia ran in, their eyes glowing a bright yellow. "We will be gone for a while, I have hired a Bounty Hunter as a babysitter... toy with him as you like... I do not care what happens to him..." Anakin said. "Yes, father..." Luke said. Anakin and Padme left and headed toward the Senate chambers. "I am taking full control of the Empire, your Senate meetings are no longer needed." Anakin announced. "And to ensure you don't come back..." Anakin quickly closed the doors. Him and Padme took out their lightsabers, and started the deaths of the Senators. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CSI Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 Geez. Now you're a pure Dark Sider. Well, good luck on that and nice chapter and looking forward to more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anakin Skywalker Posted January 1, 2007 Author Share Posted January 1, 2007 Thanks for the Comment CSI, I should have the next chapter out by tommorrow or sometime next week... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Catto Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 Excellent job! I like the Darkside Fics. Great start and looking forward to the next Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grey Master Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 Always likes DS fics, keep them up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inyri Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 Hm, it's not bad, but all the non-dialogue reads more like stage notes than fiction. If that's not your strong point, you may want to consider writing in play format. Otherwise, some more fluidity would really enhance your story. Also, you may want to check on your grammar... Perfect punctuation most people can live without, but things like "him and Padme" really sound bad in a story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steven Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 I'm going to have to agree with InyriForge here. The idea to this fic is good you just need to work on the wording and speach. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diego Varen Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 As I told you on your Forum, very good start Anakin. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Randus Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 great start anakin... very well written, cant wait to see more! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dark_Lady Posted January 1, 2007 Share Posted January 1, 2007 Very nice start. Although I thought Padme wasn't Force-Sensitive. Then again, that's the lovely thing about alternate universes... aren't they fantastic? I like this fic a lot and am looking forward to more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anakin Skywalker Posted January 1, 2007 Author Share Posted January 1, 2007 Hm, it's not bad, but all the non-dialogue reads more like stage notes than fiction. If that's not your strong point, you may want to consider writing in play format. Otherwise, some more fluidity would really enhance your story. Also, you may want to check on your grammar... Perfect punctuation most people can live without, but things like "him and Padme" really sound bad in a story. I'm going to have to agree with InyriForge here. The idea to this fic is good you just need to work on the wording and speach. I will assume you meant no insult, but this is the first time in a while I've worked on this fic.... I even lost the fic.... so I can't copy it.... so........ this is a restart.... and for right now........ I'm just working on getting reaquainted to it...... I will fix grammar mistakes later.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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