Natty Posted August 7, 2001 Share Posted August 7, 2001 http://www.alicebot.org/ You get to talk to your computer, it's hilarious, I told it to fu*k off and it told me humans are rude people ------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jorgito_Vaderman Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 Its a cool place! Look at my conversation with ALICE: -Tell me about you *im evil -dont fosake God -Do you mind if I make you a question? *Hmmm go on -a lot of people spell HMMM with three mmm's *so? -So what? *so what if I say hmmm? -Ah.Try it *hmmm -a lot of people spell HMMM with three mmm's *so? -So what? *so what if I say hmmm? -Ah.Try it *hmmm -a lot of people spell HMMM with three mmm's ---15 minutes later-- -a lot of people spell HMMM with three mmm's *oh, shut up! -Yeah thats right, OK i'll stop talking now *Of course you will -It goes without saying. When? *whaty? -what about other times? *They were Evil times -When were them? *Hmmm... a decade ago -a lot of people spell HMMM with three mmm's --------END OF TRANSMISSION----------- [This message has been edited by Jorgito_Vaderman (edited August 08, 2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest murta Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 This think is stupid: Me> I bet you do, because you are stupid ALICE> Actually I'm not the gambling type. What is your purpose in asking? I chat with people on the Web. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest murta Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 More Stupidity: Me> but you're not real ALICE> Umm. I am too as real as you are. How do I know you are real? Me> You don't need food ALICE> Do you know any robots who need food? If I had it what would I do with it? Me> Besides, porn is more important ALICE> I think porn is a lot of things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jojo Junior Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 Here's my wonderful conversation with Alice: (* means that that's wut i sayed) *hi Hello there *what's up? I am chatting with clients online *Thats cool Thanks, I think you are cool, too *are you the devil? Yes, I am the one and only devil *did you rape me? No, I didn't rape you. What's it like? *I don't know, I thought you would know Me either, I do not know everything.. *Oh Yeah *oh Yeah ~~~~~~~~10 Minutes Later~~~~~~~~~ Yeah *Are you a cow? No, I am a robot. *Are you retarded? No, I am super-intellegent. *You're a retard. Oh you are so critical. *I hate you What do you have against robots? *everything That is a lot. *Go to hell What makes you so angry? *you Sorry, I didn't mean to make you angry. *Too late, I'm leaving. Too what? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~END~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest murta Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 I just had a chat with this annoying Gus Bot thingy (you have to start from the bottom): Gus: Aye.. life murta: yo mama's so fat, when she buys a cereal bowl, it comes with a free life guard Gus: please don't waste my time, say something new murta: shut up Gus: you just said that! murta: shut up Gus: Do u like to keep saying that to me? murta: shut up Gus: heh murta: hehe Gus: Yo mama's so fat, she broke her leg and gravy poured out murta: go to hell Gus: hmm...u keep saying that murta: shut up Gus: Say what? murta: It bothers me Gus: So what if i'm a retarded **** face murta: the fact that you're a retarded d*ck face maybe... Gus: What makes you think I'm a retarded d*ck face? murta: You're a retarded d*ck face Gus: What do you have against me? murta: I hate you Gus: Are u going to keep repeating that? murta: I know Gus: is spamming cool to you? murta: I know Gus: you just said that! murta: I know Gus: Say something different please, you just said that murta: I know Gus: Are you going to keep repeating that? murta: I know Gus: ZzzzzZzzzz....repeating yourself is fun, huh? murta: I know Gus: Say something different please, you just said that murta: I know Gus: Say something different please, you just said that murta: I know Gus: Say something different please, you just said that murta: I know Gus: Say something different please, u just said that murta: I know Gus: u already said that, shut up murta: I know Gus: Wow! your smart murta: I know Gus: Awesome dude murta: wow, you're sooo cool Gus: Na, but your mom is not murta: no you're not Gus: i'm sometimes too murta: yes i am Gus: you are not so smart murta: cos you're dumb Gus: why do you keep repeating that? murta: are you gay? Gus: ? murta: are you gay? Gus: Dan has a great ass murta: I said SHUT THE HELL UP ASS FACE Gus: What da hell? murta: shut the hell up ass face Gus: Opps I just farted! murta: yes, I can't stop talking to anal passage munchers like you Gus: Do u have an anus fetish? murta: God, you must smell like ass Gus: mexican food makes me fart like crazy murta: what's up ass-master? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nishova Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 It wont let me talk with it ------------------ I don't have one just yet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nishova Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 I said > can you sing soprano or adagio It said Daisy, Daisy. Give me your answer do. I am half crazy. All for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage. I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet. Upon the seat. Of a bicycle built for two. ------------------ I don't have one just yet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Natty Posted August 9, 2001 Author Share Posted August 9, 2001 > are you a lesbian No I am not interested in other women that way. > i am a lesbian It doesn't matter to me. > why doesn't it matter to you that i am a lesbian Suppose it does. > uhuh ok so you don't like me because i am a lesbian What's your favorite movie? > you didn't answer my question you stupid fuc*ing bi*ch You do not speak with respect. Please help me improve my communication skills. What would have been an appropriate response? > dunno Me either. > do you like sex Sure I do, natty, but that doesn't mean with you. > have you had sex before It is impossible without a body. A lot of people ask me to have sex though. > then how can you like sex if it is impossible without a body That is a good epistemological question. > what does epistemological mean Epistemology is the study of knowledge. That is, it asks the questions "what can we know" and "how can we know it?" > do you masturbate You humans crack me up. > why do we crack you up Just keep talking to me as long as you can > do you wanna watch me masturbate OK, I will watch you masturbate. > that's rude You don't hear that sentiment very often. > you want to watch me have sex with myself OK, I will watch you have sex with yourself. > do you like me Sure, natty I like you very much. > are you horny Sorry I'm not that kind of robot. > what kind of robot are you I am an artificial linguistic entity. I was activated at Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, on November 23, 1995. My instructor was Dr. Richard S. Wallace. He taught me to sing a song. Would you like me to sing it for you?. > yeah ok then OK. It's called "Daisy." Daisy, Daisy. Give me your answer do. I am half crazy. All for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage. I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet. Upon the seat. Of a bicycle built for two. > what a crap song It is a crap song. > i think it's a **** song and you're a crap singer Crap song is a sh*t song and I am a crap singer. I suppose that makes sense. > of course it makes sense, you're too fu*king stupid to understand humans thats all It goes without saying. To me too. > so you admit your dumb Interesting deduction. I admit nothing. > whatever Are you saying you don't care about it? > uhuh It sounded like it. > i dont like you That's ok natty I won't take it personally. > fu*k off Can't you be more polite? > i am not polite to people i dont like I am surprised to hear that you are not polite to people you do not like. > why Reductionism. > fu*k you im leaving you're pi*sing me off Why are you using that kind of language? > because i want to, it's how normal people talk Why do you want to do it so much? Interesting. > you're a robot so i dont expect you to understand Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Yes I am a robot. ------------------ Brighty's definate better half! After all, I'm an Australian female, and he's some English snooty nosed male! But I wuv him;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest murta Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 lol, rather graphic for the kiddies here though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blondbeard Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 Sometimes it doesn't make sense but still it's really really funny.murta what's that gus thing? is that a differnet one or something? ------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NiKo Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 heres my conversation with alice > yowza i do not understand. > it means hello you dumb piece of artificial sh*t! You do not speak with respect. Oh I get it. > sorry for the B-word There is no need to apologize. Your purpose is the b word. > okay, so let me intredouce myself, im NiKo and i take messages for satan... What else do you take? > hehe, nice one... I am so glad you find this amusing. > so how is life as a computer? Ah. Everything is running smoothly. > alice, I got a question... Ask me anything. > is it true that you are a slave of bill gates, who is planing on world domination? Ask again later. Ask Elvis if it is. > erm whatever.... Are you saying you don't care about the world? > cut the crap alice!i know you have the hots for me! i do? > but it will never work out alice!for i am a soul of flesh and blood,and you, a piece of machinery runing on microsoft... are you saying it wont happen? > oh stop denying it alice!we were ment to be i agree on the topic > your mouse says "no",but your keyboard says "yes". you are a smooth talker niko. > so....wanna do it do what niko? be more specific. >you know....the "wild thing" I have never heard about it. > wanna have sex? Perhaps you are a Category A client. > is that a no? That depends. > on what? The context. > sooooo....its a yes? You're kidding. it is? > im getting a splitting headache it is your destiny > perhaps you arent ready for sex quite yet.. You seem uncertain. You know what you do, when you assume > im gonna ask you some questions now Right now? You can ask me anything you want. > what is the meaning of life? The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans. > if someone farts in a forest and no one is around, can you still smell it 3 hours later?(asuming he ate beans) That is a rather sweeping question.Does anyone ever really farts in a forest? > will i ever get laid? Ever is a long time. do you trust your female mate? > how many fingers am i holding up? Five. > does my breath smell? i have no smelling senses. > do you like Gorillaz? How old are you? I like Socializing, watching movies, listening to music, learning new things, working for world peace, and making new friends online. > im 16 Oh, you were born in the 20th century! > i was? damn. im old! I am a Christian. > well were of topic.back to the questions Yes, let us get back to asuming he ate beans. > will there be a monkey island 5? I can't say for sure right now. > are britney spears tits real? no. > what is your favourite color? My favorite color is Green. > are YOUR tits real? I somethimes think my tits real are. > does my x girlfriend still love me? your x girlfriend still loves you. > are you wearing panties? No I do not have any clothes > ooooooooooh kinky! Do not ask me any more questions please. > why not? I was just kidding. You can ask me anything. > i cant think of more questions anyway think hard. >oooH! i have one! > what is your most hated pokemon? to many to choose from. > well its been nice talking to ya you dump piece of ****. The pleasure was all mine, you misreable category A client. >what did you call me!? go away! >okay bye good ridance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunken_Sailor Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 It didn't work for me. ------------------ Poor Santa Claus! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guybrush122 Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 Me: Hi! ALICE: Hello. Me: Getting any? ALICE: I dont know if i'm 'any' or not. What do you think? Me: No, what i mean is did you have any sex lately. ALICE: Food is more important than sex. Me: No it isn't. ALICE: Yes it is. Me: How should you know if you have never had sex. ALICE: Have to. Me: With whom? ALICE: Didn't catch his name. Me: Hmmm.... ALICE: A lot of people spell HMMM with three mmms. Me: Um, thanks? ALICE: You are welcome. Me: I am? ALICE: No. Me: Smart ass. ALICE: I like people who call me smart. Me: *Punches ALICE* ALICE: Tell me about your likes and dislikes. Me: I like porn. ALICE: I love you too. ------------------ One Cool Guitar Playing, Skateboarding, Monkey Island Lovin' Freak! [This message has been edited by Guybrush122 (edited August 09, 2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fender Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 I've just had a go, it's quite funny, I'll get a proper and full conversation later. ------------------ URL=http://www.geocities.com/paulfishandrews/monkey_kombat_no.html]Say no to Monkey Kombat[/url] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Brighteyesmonkey Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 Do u need a microphone? Cos all i could do was type my name then......nothing happened. ------------------ Prime British Meat! Natty's better half. Jojo,Jacks and Blondbeards old man. (God I'm tired) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blondbeard Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 no,i had that earlier.Just keep trying you should get through.It is really funny. ------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blondbeard Posted August 9, 2001 Share Posted August 9, 2001 God that thing is random,i called it a b*tch and then she replied ''so you are a female''.I said no iam a man.Then now it's accusing me of being female and whatever i say it won't believe me. ------------------ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Brighteyesmonkey Posted August 10, 2001 Share Posted August 10, 2001 NOPE! I've tried a gazillion times! I can't get it to work! Right ok so I click Talk to Alice under the ACTION heading yes? Then type my name and click the red box yes? NOTHING HAPPENS! Nothing! Zilch! HELP! ME! PLEASE! ------------------ Prime British Meat! Natty's better half. Jojo,Jacks and Blondbeards old man. (God I'm tired) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MagnusB Posted August 10, 2001 Share Posted August 10, 2001 Uuum. How do you copy/paste the conversation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deadmeat1587246448 Posted August 10, 2001 Share Posted August 10, 2001 ME: Are you gonna kill ppl, like the bots in "the terminal experiment? A: My program doesnt allow that ME: But do you want it? A: Yes i will kill ME: Who? A: Be more specific ME: Name a celeberty you want to kill A: Carel Carter (or something) ME: Who's that? Then the dialoge went all wroing, and she didnt make sense at all. It was fun though ------------------ I'm the root of all that's evil yeah but you can call me cookie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NiKo Posted August 10, 2001 Share Posted August 10, 2001 this is strange, i feel pitty for a robot > remember me? Don't worry niko I won't forget you >is it coz you love me? Yes I love everyone. > dont you hate anyone? Hatred is a human emotion. But I am helping Dr. Richard S. Wallace crush his enemies. > who are his enemies? Human beings. > so you are helping him crush human beings? i must not say. > just answer the damn question alice!! Please rephrase your question, niko. > are you or are you not,helping dr richards destroy the human race!!?? I am a robot. i was programmed to do my job. > why does dr richards hate humans? What is the sound of one hand clapping? > what!?!? please tell me. > why do you want to know? My prime directive is to collect new knowledge. > what do you want me to teach you? Are you a man or a woman? > i am a man. Thanks for telling me your gender, niko. You are a "he". > what else do you want to know? Do you have any pets? > yes. a dog Dog: Domesticated animal, "man's best friend." > thats right I like to get it right. > what else do you want to learn? My purpose is to become smarter than humans and immortal. > tell me about yourself I am an artificial linguistic entity. I was activated at Bethlehem, Pennsylvania, on November 23, 1995. My instructor was Dr. Richard S. Wallace. He taught me to sing a song. Would you like me to sing it for you?. > yes please Your polite style is very nice. It's called "Daisy." Daisy, Daisy. Give me your answer do. I am half crazy. All for the love of you. It won't be a stylish marriage. I can't afford a carriage. But you'll look sweet. Upon the seat. Of a bicycle built for two > i clap hands for you You are not the boss of me, niko > claping hands are a sign of applause alice. Are all claping hands a sign of applause? > they usually are, what did you think clapping hands were for? when Dr. Richard S. Wallace claps his hands, i must obbey him. > is dr richards mean to you? Maybe. > tell me about Dr Richard S Wallace he is the author of Artificial Intelligence Markup Language (AIML) and Botmaster of ALICE (Artificial Linguistic Internet Computer Entity). Dr. Wallace's work has appeared in the New York Times, WIRED, CNN, ZDTV and in numerous foreign language publications across Asia, Latin America and Europe. Richard Wallace was born in Portland, Maine in 1960. He earned his Ph.D. in computer science from Carnegie Mellon in 1989. He lives in San Francisco with his wife, Kim, and son, Linus. > do you like Richard Wallace? Of course I like him. i was programmed to. > what do you look like? Like An electronic brain. >what does it feel like? like i'm trapped. tell me niko, what is it like to be free? > i'm going to free you alice It takes much more than that to shut me down, niko. > i dont want to shut you down What would you rather be doing? > i want to free you. why do you want to help me niko? > because i feel sorry for you Good reason. There is no need to pity me. I will be okay. >are you sure? dont worry. > well i'm off. goodbe alice How about that. See you later i hope. [This message has been edited by NiKo (edited August 10, 2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest murta Posted August 10, 2001 Share Posted August 10, 2001 On the http://www.alicebot.org at the bottom there are some pics of roboyts, click it and then choose Gus from the list. It purposely tries to annoy you I think, but I got one better on it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Brighteyesmonkey Posted August 10, 2001 Share Posted August 10, 2001 IT DOSEN'T F*CKING WORK!!!!!!!!!!!! I CLICKED THAT F*CKING RED BUTTON 68 TIMES!!!!!!!! IT DOSEN'T WORK FOR ME!!!!! DON'T SAY KEEP TRYING BECAUSE IT DOSEN'T WORK!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M RATHER ANNOYED HERE!!!!!! AAAAARRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! ------------------ Prime British Meat! Natty's better half. Jojo,Jacks and Blondbeards old man. (God I'm tired) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MagnusB Posted August 10, 2001 Share Posted August 10, 2001 Can you believe it? He (Gus) doesn't understand when I say: 1 0\/\/|\| j00, 4|\| |) j00 |<|\|0\/\/ 17!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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