Natty Posted May 23, 2002 Share Posted May 23, 2002 OK- here's the deal, there's this guy in my class at school right? And his name is Tony (ok pretty useless info but oh well) anyways, last week in class the room was pretty hot and I was complaining (coz as you know or most of you know I can't stand hot weather) anyways he kept telling me to take all my clothes off since I'm so hot or some crap like that and this went on for the whole class until finally I told him to f*ck off and stop sexually harassing me. Anyway on Tuesday he apologized, but then on Thursday, I was assigned to work with him on an assigment and I cracked the ****s and said I didn't wanna work with him, and when my teacher, Raj asked why, I told him the whole story about how Tony keeps looking at me and what he said on. Then on Friday in the resturant class, me and Tony were in the kitchen, and he kept trying to ask me out- had I seen such and such a movie (ok so he might have been trying to be friendly) he kept asking me what me and my bf were doing, where we were going, he then offered to drive me home, and invited me over to his place for dinner. He was even doing similar on Monday or Tuesday asking similar questions- it was like he wanted to know where I was gonna be or something and it did freak me out So anyway, on Monday Tony kept staring at me, and even a friend of mine in my class, so we decided to tell our co-ordinator (the head teacher I guess you could call him) that he keeps staring at us and it's freaking us out. Ross (the co-ordinator) wanted to know how long it's been going on for. It's been going on for weeks but in the last week or 2 it's really started to freak me out (as well as my friends who he stares at as well- although he hasn't made any comments to them) All I wanted was the teachers to talk to him and tell him to stop staring and stuff, but today I find out they've issued a sexual harassment file on him or something and have warned him in writing, and now I feel really bad like maybe I was over-reacting. or something or maybe I imagined it- I don't know, I don't think I was imagining it- especially if others in the class say that Tony stares at them as well, and the comments were pretty bad that one of the guys in my class backed me up last week and told him to stop sexually harassing me. The thing is- do you guys think I over-reacted or could have imagined it? Look I know I can be a flirt sometimes, and I don't deny that, the problem is I don't even like the guy, and I never talk to him unless I had to, so it's not like I was leading him on or anything or flirting so he was getting the idea I was interested in him (and lets face it- why would I be interested in a 38yo guy who smells?) He called me racist on Tuesday coz I told him to f-u-c-k off. The reason why he said I'm racist is coz he's Asian, WTF that had no reason to do with it whatsoever. But now I feel bad coz maybe he thinks I'm racist or something and that's the only reason why I did it- which isn't the case, it's coz he was freaking me out. I kinda wanna ask him or apologize to him, but he hasn't said anything to me or came near me- I don't even know if he knows it was me who dobbed him in... OK- I've babbled enough, but judging from what I've written does it sound like I've over reacted- should I talk to him? Should I avoid him? Get someone else to talk to him or what? Or just forget about it and pretend nothing happened? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joshi Posted May 23, 2002 Share Posted May 23, 2002 i don't think u over reacted, if anything, your co-ordinator did by putting that sexual harrasment file on him. judging by what u've told me, u never asked them to put the file on him, just to warn him off and frankly, i think he should have just got a warning and if he kept doing it, then a sexual harrassment file, but not straight away like that. i bet it took him a while to figure out why he got it at first. i'm not saying it's slow, but because he never expected anything like this. if he was just warned, he would know it would come if he carried on and probably would have stoppe. so no, i dont think u over reacted, i think u did the right thing, but maybe u should talk to your co-ordinator about it and try and sort it out. try not to feel to bad, u did what any person in your circumstanses should have done. hope this helps cy ya neil Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Natty Posted May 23, 2002 Author Share Posted May 23, 2002 The co-ordinator talked to him in class on Tuesday (well after class- I told the teacher during the break and he talked to him after class) as far as I knew judging from the conversation I had with the teacher on Tuesday- all I asked him to do was talk to Tony and let Tony know it was freaking me out and not to do it coz he wouldn't listen to me or anyone else, but I thought he would most likely listen to a teacher since the teacher has the more authoritive position, and especially if the talk came from a co-ordinator (if that makes sense) The only reason I can think of for the sexual harassment file is coz I told 2 teachers- does that mean they have to automatically take action? I don't really understand it. When the teacher told me yesterday, I was so surprised and said I didn't want to take it this far. I asked the teacher yesterday and he said because I was the person who brought the comments up (and from what it sounds like they took action more over the comments than the staring itself) about comments hes made and stuff- they have the right to take action or something. I could probably get Daniel to talk to him, since Daniel is like the only guy who Tony talks to (Daniel is another friend in my class) But it's turned out a bigger mess than what I thought it ever would be Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joshi Posted May 24, 2002 Share Posted May 24, 2002 well, like i said, i think that the teachers and coordinator over reacted about this and shouldn't have given that guy that file, but just warned him off of you. it probably won't blow over too quickly, but with luck and a little persuasive talking by you to the coordinator, this should be sorted out. just be patient. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grannen Posted May 24, 2002 Share Posted May 24, 2002 Natty, perhaps that guy finds you attractive? and Grannen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fender Posted May 24, 2002 Share Posted May 24, 2002 can there be a law passed that grannens dude friends are made into smileys? and Fender Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Natty Posted May 25, 2002 Author Share Posted May 25, 2002 Grannen needs his own smiley as well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kjølen Posted May 25, 2002 Share Posted May 25, 2002 Hey, a smiley.....that could just answer my problem.... and Kjølen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sheaday6 Posted May 25, 2002 Share Posted May 25, 2002 why would I be interested in a 38yo guy who smells ew Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Natty Posted May 25, 2002 Author Share Posted May 25, 2002 Hello, I'm spamming, just so I can do this and Natty Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fender Posted May 25, 2002 Share Posted May 25, 2002 stop it! Everyone's stealing my idea.... that I stole fair and square! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Feral Posted May 25, 2002 Share Posted May 25, 2002 OOh, ooh, my turn! and Grannen . . . D'oh! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NiKo Posted May 25, 2002 Share Posted May 25, 2002 and NiKo Hah! i'm so original! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Al-back from the BigWhoop Posted May 25, 2002 Share Posted May 25, 2002 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest King Andrei Posted May 26, 2002 Share Posted May 26, 2002 I wanna do this too! and Andrei555 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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