Burnseyy

I tend to keep the original text, but improve upon it. Unless something sounds absolutely ridiculous and out of character, I take it out. With The Huntress, I think people are going to look at the Mira from K2 and the younger one in my story and say 'that's not really like Mira' instead of doing the math and realising there's about 6 or 7 years age difference.

And it would be best to get the main characters of K1 and K2 acquainted quickly.

Like, Alayna and Bastila and Carth.

I'm sort of in between. I write a VERY undetailed version, like "Mira is sat in a bar, watches as bartender gets an unclean glass," etc., to get the vague idea of what's going to happen, and then write it directly onto the computer. But what annoys me, is there's an auto correction, so that a lower case i changes to an upper case I even if it's in the middle of a word. -.-; so I have to delete it everyone I open wordpad.

No, I don't sleep plus I'm at a friends house, and he's on guitar hero, so I thought I'd check out the forum! Hmf.

Well, I figure they'll hear about the enclave being built in chapter 1, and want to leave straight away, because they'll believe it to be the doings of Revan.

I have inspiration but I haven't managed to put pen to paper yet.

Do you write straight onto the computer?

I did it without thinking though, just because they seemed best at the time (and two of them were favourites!)

Anyway, emotion can be added easily, if you know how to do it... I used to actually be able to do it, but I haven't written my own story in about a year (due to my GCSEs), which is a pain.

I think since I've become a little ignorant of my own feelings, I can't seem to write it very well either.

Well, we all have difficulties, like me with emotion, so if you want any help, just ask. ^^

Running water? That might explain the lack of background sound.

Y'know, I just realised, I picked the 4 most unemotional characters..

Mira, Bao-Dur, Bastila and Revan.

Bastila cause shes like, a proper Jedi.

lol well if I was writing about a completely destroyed planet I'd say how the silence and lack of life seemed to press heavily on the exile's senses.

Or how the landscape extends beyond sight, with no obstacles and no distractions, and how the physical paralells the reality, in that it is very distracting and disturbing.

ideas.

>.>

Nice start, but can I give some constructive critisism?

The beginning sounds more like you're listing what's happening rather than describing it... if you get me.

And there wasn't really much description of Visas - it was more thoughts of the Exile.

Are you planning on writing more?

Alright, write away.

And I have a great idea for the Bao/Exile scene. You're good at emotion, right? And I'm good at detail. You write the emotional structure, the words, the effects it has on the people, and I'll add my detail to it, to make it sound more 'realistic', if you will. Also, if I feel something needs to be added, I'll ask your permission to add it.

Do you agree?

Some of those OCs will have to be inactive characters, like more in the backround than anything else. Additionally, I think I should get to work on my Bastila and Carth scene, simultaneous to you, so that we'll be able to perfect them both, before I leave.

Also I advise you read "A False Peace"

Ahh I see. Well, how ever much you write, don't feel inclined to meet a certain amount of pages if you're done with it.

How do we intend to have a half and half part in the Bao/Exile talking about their feelings, bit?

I don't really want any more characters unless a very minor one comes along.

Anyway, I think we should each design our own OC, very roughly, and show them to each other. We could combine ideas, and pick one or the other. That would decide our OC for us.

As for the argument thing, I totally agree with you. I don't even like posting in Kavar's anymore, because if you state an opinion, you usually get people basically saying 'your opinion is wrong', or 'where's your evidence?'

It's a discussion, not an argument. If I wanted an argument, I'd have more than enough comebacks, but that would likely get me banned lol so I reframe from it.

20 pages?! You're talking about A5 aren't you? lol. If it's A4, my longest chapter has been 7 pages, but if it's A5, I dunno.

I thought Yuthura's voice actress had a very... hoarse voice... reminded me of someone. I think the best voice actress/actor was Carth's. He was great.

Seven? like A4 sized?

And I don't like Visas, due to her inexistent personality, either. How she is most guy's favourite character, I will never know. My friend bally3000 said it was her 'voice'. Yes, that's an actress, not Visas! lol

Don't worry, I knew what you meant lol and I'm an eavesdropper, I admit it - but you get so much info. out of it, so as long as I don't spread gossip, I see no problem with it.

You intend to start writing the Visas bit then? Have you started it yet?

Well, tomatoes can... be ... nice? >_> lmao.

It's hell when you finally get over your burns and then you get more. Tisn't healthy.

Damn JKR's brainfarts! She killed off almost everyone. It would've been good to see Neville kill Bellatrix, but he's probably less skilled than Mrs Weasley. Anyway, if you saw your daughter about to be attacked, you'd go all crazyyyy mother (or father in your case) on that person, wouldn't you? I loved what she said though.

All my favourite characters were killed off Dobby wasn't one of them. But Sirius was, Snape was, Lupin, Tonks... Luna and Neville didn't die - BUT they didn't even get together.

I'm going to Tenerife. I'll most likely come back red as a crisp, despite the fact I wear factor 50. I'm too pale...

I know! And when she killed them off it was just "oh yeah, Tonks and Lupin are dead" - I didn't want my favourite characters go die, but at least let them go out with a bang, JKR! Fred and Hedwig made me cry lmao. It was so sad! They were so unexpected. I don't usually cry at books... my friends said I was heartless because I didn't cry at Sirius, Dumbledore or Cedric etc.

And pfft. Switch sides will you, DY?

of couuurse you knew

You know what's ironic? The day before you get back I go away. Though, I dunno if we're still going. my blog will explain why!

I hated Harry - he may have been the main character, but I just couldn't care less about him lol. Luna is one of my favourites, because she's so quirky, but also smarter than most of the crew My favourite though is Tonks, or Lupin. (not because they got together!) they're just so awesome.

I did think a lot of the US was like new York, but until I saw other areas of America I didn't know what they'd be like.

Like I said, I haven't been that many places, and Manchester is called "the next London" because the town is almost as big and popular. But there are a few distinct differences. Most of London aren't even full English not that I have a problem with that. I hate people who seem to think racism is okay because theyre "invading the country." Wow, I argue about that so much.

London is the poshest, most expensive, queen-obsessed (T_T) and from what I remember, just as busy as New York.

It's good enough to visit though.

http://www.lucasforums.com/forumdisplay.php?f=321

see the Coruscant Entertainment Centre?

that's it.

Hey have you looked at the fanart/fanfiction section yet?

I've got my stories in there, and there's a story called "Shrouded in Darkness: Yuthura Ban's Tale" that I advise reading.

Lucasforums went down last night... so I'll just reply to your posts now:

they're all similar, except wales has it's jibberish, Scotland has it's mountains and England has it's towns/history.

and thank you. I'm midway through the 2nd chapter, now - shouldn't be too long before it's up.

Yeah, I couldn't survive in London. My impression of London was that everyone is very... 'tidy' and 'strict'. Nothing like Manchester. We're a dump but a good dump.

Have you got an opinion on England? Do people really believe all we drink is tea, all speak like Bastila and wear suits 24/7?

It wasn't in New York... I think it was New Jamacia or something. >_> I could be wrong.

And that's terrible! Don't people notice and do anything about it?

In England it's not soo much like that. I haven't been many places, but I know London is the most expensive place I've ever been, and where I live, Manchester, it's quite... average. You see lots of poor on the street in Manchester, but when I was in London, I didn't - not sure why.

It was a speculation, I was just asking if you'd noticed the similarities.

And there are some really poor looking places - we drove past them on the way to New York. I mean, we have poor areas around here, places that have even been boarded off because of gangsters and yobs but those places in America looked worse.