Drazin Posted February 9, 2005 Share Posted February 9, 2005 Poopsie WaffleSquirt. Niice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T7nowhere Posted February 9, 2005 Share Posted February 9, 2005 poopsie gorilla-butt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Stryke Posted February 9, 2005 Share Posted February 9, 2005 LOL! This stuff is hilarious. My friend works at an office job and sends me a lot of stuff like this, but rarely this funny. Oh, yeah...I am.... Loopy Bubble-Sniffer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boba Rhett Posted February 9, 2005 Share Posted February 9, 2005 Crusty Girdletush. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted February 9, 2005 Author Share Posted February 9, 2005 Originally posted by Boba Rhett Crusty Girdletush. I think they make an ointment for that oh wait, that says Administrator doesn't it!? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedHawke Posted February 10, 2005 Share Posted February 10, 2005 Cheeseball ChickenBrains here! Originally posted by ChAiNz.2da oh wait, that says Administrator doesn't it!? Run, ChAiNz... run!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sabretooth Posted February 10, 2005 Share Posted February 10, 2005 Cheeseball WaffleBuns!!!! OK, fearsome. Originally posted by ChAiNz.2da It says Administrator doesn't it!? [/size] Oh My God. Consider community doomed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boba Rhett Posted February 10, 2005 Share Posted February 10, 2005 Get me some of that ointment and I'll forget this whole thing ever happened. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Liverandbacon Posted February 10, 2005 Share Posted February 10, 2005 I end up as Crusty Bubblebuns Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted February 10, 2005 Author Share Posted February 10, 2005 Originally posted by Boba Rhett Get me some of that ointment and I'll forget this whole thing ever happened. Straight from the Elf Factory®.... New & Improved! RHETT-ATION H® I've heard it works for both Administrators & Moderators hope this works everyone.. hehe ------------------ ps - just in case, click it....it's a link Feel free to use & distribute as necessary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted February 24, 2005 Author Share Posted February 24, 2005 Yeah, it's me again.... Not much today from the fine folks at JTV (my work), but here's something that wasn't a definite 'thread locker'... I hope This helmet fits funny Some things are better left unknown Super Heros Business Class ENJOY! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted February 28, 2005 Author Share Posted February 28, 2005 A man and a woman who have never met before found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, the two were tired and fell asleep quickly - he in the upper bunk and she in the lower. At 1:00 a.m., he leaned over and gently wakes the woman, saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold." "I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married". "Wow! That's a great idea!!" he exclaimed. "Good," she replied. "Get your own damn blanket!" After a moment of silence, he farted. --------------- sometimes it's the simple things that make me laugh the most... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted March 1, 2005 Author Share Posted March 1, 2005 JTV and I "proudly" present... As I Mature (204kb .jpg) Be Careful of What You Wear (568kb .WMV file) - Nothing "dirty" but it does have sound and a guy dancing around in the "skivvies" (workplace headsup) ENJOY! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted March 3, 2005 Author Share Posted March 3, 2005 Things to waste your valuable brain cells on In the 1400's a law was set forth that a man was not allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the rule of thumb" Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden"...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language. The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone. Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury. Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better. Coca-Cola was originally green. It is impossible to lick your elbow. The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this...) - The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38% The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400 The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000 Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair. The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer. The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history: - Spades - King David - Hearts - Charlemagne - Clubs - Alexander, the Great - Diamonds - Julius Caesar 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321 If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes. Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and CharlesThomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later. Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what? A. Their birthplace Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested? A. Obsession Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"? A. One thousand Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common? A. All invented by women. Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil? A. Honey Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day of the year? A. Father's Day In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... "goodnight, sleep tight." It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month . Which we know today as the "honeymoon". In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England, when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them "Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down." It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's" Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice. ~~~~~~~AND FINALLY~~~~~~~ At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stingerhs Posted March 3, 2005 Share Posted March 3, 2005 ^^^^ *reads post* 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321 now my life is complete. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drazin Posted March 3, 2005 Share Posted March 3, 2005 At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow I was waiting for that statistic! When I read the part about you cant lick your elbow, I was thinking... "I wonder how many people will try to lick their elbow now." Thats funny. Now be a sport and tell me who "invented" the word "OK" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shok_Tinoktin Posted March 3, 2005 Share Posted March 3, 2005 Originally posted by Drazin Now be a sport and tell me who "invented" the word "OK" OK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drazin Posted March 3, 2005 Share Posted March 3, 2005 LOL. But that didnt actually give a real answer. I'll give you one of the cookies Chainz gave me for digging up that info. LOL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted March 4, 2005 Author Share Posted March 4, 2005 Originally posted by Drazin LOL. But that didnt actually give a real answer. I'll give you one of the cookies Chainz gave me for digging up that info. LOL. This better be one helluva cookie... :lol: http://www.eigozai.com/LL/WTS/OK_E.htm BUT, Here are 3 other explanations: -It was used in the 1830s in a Boston newspaper as a joke. There was an humoristic fashion to reduce a phrase to initials, and sometimes the abbreviations were mispelled to add more humor. Someone used O.K. for "all correct" (oll korrect). -The previous explanation is connected with one that says that during the Civil War, when batallions returned from the front, the first man in line carried a sign with the number of soldiers killed in action in that group. So the signs stated "9 Killed", "5 killed" and so on. If the number was zero, they stated "O K", a perfect mark. -The last one (somehow connected too), tells that during the glorious days of the telegraph, there was a man named Oscar Kent, who never commited mistakes in his transmissions. Then, if the telegraph message was signed "O.K." all was correct. Finally, here's where my opinion on the origin lies... in German the expression "Ohne Korrekten" means "without correction" and in Greek "Ola Kala" means "everything's fine" Seeing how the American language (I don't mean "English" I mean "American") seems to have pretty much either adopted or bastardized other culture's language, I firmly believe it was either of the latter explanations. I'm leaning towards Greek, since most of our language is based from Latin... Unfortunately, "OK" still seems to be the most mysterious word to have ever originated... I never would've thought such a simple 'word' would have brought so much debate over the years and I was intrigued of it's mystery after researching it. So in turn Drazin, here's your cookie for making me use my gray matter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted March 15, 2005 Author Share Posted March 15, 2005 Too much time on your hands + nothing better to spend your money on = this Some people cease to amaze me... I honestly can't say if I think in some nerdy way I think this is "kewl"... or just thankful I'm not as big of a geek as I thought I was... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stingerhs Posted March 15, 2005 Share Posted March 15, 2005 ^^^^ you see, i look at that and think "why in the heck did he use such a piece of crap to start with anyway??" being a somewhat car-buff (or car-nerd. whatever you want to call it), i would have used a delorian for that build. it would have been so much cooler..... of course, he could always get a lambo kit for the doors, add in some nitrous oxide, swap out the mitsu motor for a V-Tec, add a clearcoat to the paintjob, slam it down a bit, put on some Pilot Sports with 18's instead of 16's, and finally add a spark plug to the exhaust to give you that 'burn' effect. oh, and i'd translate all that for you guys, but i'll let you figure it out on your own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChAiNz.2da Posted March 22, 2005 Author Share Posted March 22, 2005 You Know You Drink Too Much When... Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream. The back of your head keeps getting hit by the toilet seat. The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar When you go to donate blood and they ask what proof? You think the Four Basic Food Groups are Caffeine, Nicotine, Alcohol, and Hotties. You have a "happy hour" at home When you are sober, people ask you what's wrong? You spend all night making a board game called Alcohol Land Although you drove home the other night you can't remember how you got home or where you parked your car "Hi ocifer. I'm not under the affluence of incohol." Your favorite drink is ethanol. "Why does everybody think I have a prinking droblem?! - I don't have a prinking droblem!" "I don't have a drinking prob..pleb..prub.. *hic * Pash me another, tarbender." You can spend a whole night holding up walls to prevent their (your) collapse. You instinctively know where the alcohol is in a store you've never been in before Clubs raise their drink prices because you haven't attended in a while You think beer and ramen make a good breakfast You frequently urinate outdoors. When you first wake up and you're afraid you're gonna die and a half-hour later you're afraid you won't. You fall asleep taking a dump. You believe that spilling a beer is alcohol abuse. You go to the john to hurl, but you take your beer with you. You find it's easier to study drunk. You're on a first name basis at the detoxification center. Beer ads make sense. You wake up to the sound of your dog drinking out of the toilet and you're so dry that it sounds mighty thirst quenching. You wake the next morning and start drinking a few of the half empt ies left sitting around the room. The space on your driver's license that tells your eye color reads "bloodshot". You fall down a flight of steps and DON'T spill a drop of your beer. You mix your cocktails by the litre. You grow a beard because it stops beer that's running down your chin. You put off urinating in hopes of reaching that near orgasmic Zen-like piss. When the bottle says 20 standard drinks but you only get 5. You spell Alcohol with a capital letter out of respect You lose arguments with inanimate objects. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth Your career won't progress beyond Senator from Massachusettes. 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case - coincidence?? - I think not! Two hands and just one mouth... - now THAT'S a drinking problem! "Norm!" is what they say when you enter the bar. You can focus better with one eye closed The parking lot seems to have moved while you were in the bar You fall off the floor. You discover in the morning that liquid cleaning supplies have mysteriously disappeared. Hey, 5 beers has just as many calories as a burger, screw dinner! Beer: it's not just for breakfast anymore. The glass keeps missing your mouth. Vampires get woozy after bitting you. At AA meeting you begin: "Hi, my name is... uh..." Your idea of cutting back is less seltzer. You wake up in the bedroom, your underwear is in the bathroom, you fell asleep clothed. - hmm. Every night you're beginning to find your roomate's cat more and more attractive. If you're on a diet, you cut back your food calories to allow for alcohol calories. "Take me drunk, I'm home!" You wake up naked lying in the corner of a bus depot. You drink to get over a hangover. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends who drink too much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stingerhs Posted March 22, 2005 Share Posted March 22, 2005 ^^^^ dude, i had to stop reading half-way through because i was afraid my laughter would get too loud in the library. i think i'm going to have to wait to get home to read the rest. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keiko Posted March 22, 2005 Share Posted March 22, 2005 I love those red neck pics! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedHawke Posted March 23, 2005 Share Posted March 23, 2005 Originally posted by ChAiNz.2da You Know You Drink Too Much When... (Edited for space) Proof positive ChAiNz has Waaaaaayyyyy too much time on his hands! Wait a tick! You are supposed to be doing a massive saber mod... [Three Stooges] Why I oughta' [/Three Stooges] Get back to work ChAiNz! The natives are getting restless. Just Kidding ChAiNz! Or Not! Those are funny BTW! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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