[FIC] Star wars: Heart of the Guardian

[JediMaster12]

Chapter 12: The Academy

I had a wave of nostalgic emotion, not of my own before falling off Lagos. I awoke to a gentle calm that I hadn’t felt in months. I sat up to find myself in a room that vaguely reminded me of my old room when Tergis trained me on Mikkado. I looked to find Revan reading a book. No one else was around. I was so uncomfortable that I wanted to bolt right then and there. I didn’t feel any feelings for her. It was more or less someone trying to be kind and I didn’t know how to take it.

 

She must have sensed my feelings for she put the book down and said, “Don’t worry. I made a promise to watch out for you. Besides, I have a love and I…miss him.”

 

I didn’t like seeing her cry so I tried to comfort her when I saw her tears fall and I felt I was being stupid. I replied, “Thank you. I…um…am sorry of what I said. I was just well…”

 

“You were compensating for a power that was manifesting itself at an inopportune moment,” a voice from the door sounded.

 

I turned to see someone who would be a mentor and a friend. He introduced himself as Tulre Halfraven and a leading master of the council of the academy. I had my left eyebrow cocked as if waiting for an explanation while at the same time I asked, “What power?”

 

Tulre just smiled and looked at me and came closer. He wore robes similar to that of the Jedi but they differed in certain ways. He answered my question, “One I hadn’t see in years.” Then seeing the confused look on my face, he explained, “This power manifests itself in emotions. It is extremely rare and even rarer when someone exhibits it to a degree such as you do.”

 

Still not convinced I asked, “What do you mean?”

 

“Surely you have noticed it: the colors you see but no one else can’t. You feel emotions not your own and for some reason, you formed an emotional attachment to one of your companions.”

 

I looked at Tulre with a look that said simply, ‘what?’ Tulre didn’t say anything as if giving me time to think. Everything he said was as if he had seen what I had seen and experienced. I looked at him and asked, “How…”

 

“Do I know? Once long ago a Jedi Knight came to these halls asking for my help. He claimed that he had a padawan that had a unique ability that had so far not shown significant degree but he believed that it may manifest to something more powerful. I came to a small academy on Mikkado where I met an eight year old boy who impressed me with his ability to guess what a person was feeling and taking that as if it were his own. The Jedi was a man called Tergis and his padawan was a boy called Jacen whom he affectionately called J.C.”

 

I searched my memory but I couldn’t recall seeing him. “I…I…”

 

“Don’t remember. I preferred it that way when I placed the mental blocks on you. It is not your fault that the bump to the head caused this.”

 

I was grateful but something was nagging at me. I asked, “What makes this different from Jedi ability?”

 

He chuckled slightly but seemed sad. He replied, “It is a Jedi ability but it is localized here in our system. Jedi sense emotions but you tend to act them out and they are often blurred between others and your own.” Seeing I was not convinced as I pulled on a tunic and sat on the edge of the bed to listen some more, he continued, “It is the belief of many of the older masters, including me, that this place is where the Force began. It is said that the planets themselves were created by the Force for those who needed refuge. Of course being that we are sentients, there is no avoiding potential conflicts as they occur in other parts of the galaxy. This academy is one of five that train students in the ways of the Jedi but also in the ancient combat traditions and honor codes of our people.”

 

“Then how did the Jedi form in the Republic?” the question came from Revan.

 

I glanced at her and saw that she had a lively interest in this. I thought that maybe it had to do with the evil that she was chasing. Surprisingly I answered, “Possibly to find other Force sensitive and establish more academies. It could have been possible that they lost the ability to find this place.” Sounded like nonsense but I couldn’t figure out any other way to account for the fact that some people knew where Avalon was and others didn’t, especially our own people. Then it occurred to me and I asked Revan, “How did you find this place?”

 

She seemed taken aback and she seemed to think hard about it. She replied, “I don’t know. What I remember of being Darth Revan, I never remembered this system nor ever heard of it. After I was redeemed, I kept getting this image of this planet in my head and a set of hyperspace coordinates. After that I found you and Michaela, this planet.”

 

Tulre said nothing but I could sense that he was thinking of something. Instead he said, “Well I suppose you’ll be hungry. Your other companions are fine. When you are ready you can speak to the council. The mess is down the hall and on your left. There is some attire for you in that footlocker there in the corner,” and he turned and left.

 

 

It was a lot to take in about what I had learned of myself and the place that I called home. I glanced about the halls as I walked through them eating a piece of fruit and Revan following or rather walking beside me. I never noticed how small she was nor how pretty. She was slender with dark hair that came down in a long braid. Her Jedi robes reminded me of Tergis’; they were dark, pristine and not a piece out of place. I guess she noticed me looking at her for she said, “You are just as bad as Carth.”

 

Embarrassed I said, “Well I…my mind was too preoccupied to notice a good warrior.”

 

“Please. If you were any more obvious, your eyeballs would be falling out by now,” she said smiling. Then on a serious note she asked, “I hope you don’t sense any of my emotions.”

 

“No. In fact I think Tulre did something so I can’t feel them like I did.” Then stopping and looking her in the eye I saw her memories of her and her pilot. I brushed it aside and said, “I meant what I said. I am sorry about what I said that night. I miss my love too. I could sense the regret that you had when you left him behind.” I saw the tears starting to brim and I wanted to give her a hug or something. Instead I said, “Hey Pretty Girl don’t start. I’m trying to be understanding here.”

 

She smiled and started to chuckle. Where did the heck did that come from? I thought to myself. She responded. “Thanks. You have sense of humor there. Too bad I don’t have a name for you unless I can call you Kirabaros.” With that, she gave me a quick peck on the cheek and turned to walk down the hall. She turned and said, “By the way. I think the council is ready to see us.”

 

 

“Well that didn’t take long did it?” Darius said over an evening meal, “Though I do wonder why it took them two months to tell us anything.”

 

“I think they knew we’d be coming to ask for help,” I replied. Caelos wasn’t with us. He had been taken in by the academy and they wanted him to get to know the others better. I had smiled when I learned that. What was even better was the fact that Tulre had begun showing me how to control my ability these past two months. It came so easily and yet it worried me that it might not be so easy under stress. I think that was one of the reasons they kept us and the other being that they needed to alert the other Jedi. I said nothing about my thoughts to anyone but for some reason Revan asked me about it.

 

“Possibly,” Revan replied, “they are difficult to sense in their intentions. Besides maybe they know something we don’t.” It was directed mainly at me and I could tell when she gave me a piercing stare with her pretty brown eyes.

 

I was pinching the bridge of my nose trying to stifle a yawn. I excused myself and walked out to walk the balcony. I was unaware that I was being followed until I heard a voice that said, “The new robes suit you.”

 

“Thanks. I just needed to be alone for awhile.”

 

Revan approached and put her petite hand on my shoulder, “For some reason you can’t hide everything from me. You are worried about your ability, your dreams, and this war. It eats you alive.”

 

True that was what I was feeling. I turned to face her and met her dark brown eyes and said, “My nightmares have just begun. This is something far worse than the Mandalorian wars or any other war. It is out for revenge on me.”

 

“How do you know?”

 

“I felt a familiar presence. It’s come for me and I fear that it may be my fault if my home is destroyed because of me. Sooner or later, I have to face it.”

 

“Not alone. You can’t stand against a whole army by yourself,” she was confused.

 

“Not an army. One person.” I sounded like a broken holovid or something but it made sense to me. The nauseous feelings and the memories from my childhood, it made sense. My past was catching up to me.

 

Understandingly Revan gripped my shoulders, looked into my eyes and said, “I know that feeling. I thought I had to fight alone too. Carth didn’t want to hear any of it either and that was why I left without telling him and I have regretted every single day. I see now that this is bigger than anything I thought possible. You showed me that and Darius did too when he came when he did. Only together can we succeed.” She then released me and stood back. She then said softly, “But I see that you need time to think,” and she turned and walked away.

 

I was astounded by what she said to me. It was as if she knew me better than I did myself at times but then I realized that I was exactly how she was, at least when it came to shouldering burdens. She was trying to stop me before it was too late and to not leave behind the best things in life. Even though I couldn’t feel anything at the moment, I could tell that her voice was full of regret. I wanted to do something for her but I needed to think. I took a glimpse at the stars and closed my eyes.

 

I recalled some of the lessons that Tergis taught me long ago. Everything needs cooperation like sun and rain. So different and yet by working together they create harmony and life. I continued to listen to the winds and didn’t notice that Tulre had come up from behind until he placed a hand on my shoulder. He said, “Tergis was right. You do have great talent.”

 

“He said that about anyone who needed encouragement,” I replied.

 

“True but he saw something in you. By the way, the little lady you were traveling with had a sad look on her face.”

 

“Regret. Regret about leaving him behind.”

 

“And what are you going to do to deal with the emotions when you leave this place and have to take care on your own?”

 

I stared at the landscape intently and didn’t say anything at first. Tulre was waiting for an answer so I said, “I won’t.” I turned to look at Tergis. I repeated myself, “I won’t have to because I am going to Republic space. I will some how put the Republic on alert about this threat.”

 

“Or are you doing this for her?”

 

“Both. I realized that after conclave, councils are ineffective. I mean the formality of it. We can’t pretend that nothing is happening.”

 

“Yes but if you rush into this, you could become her.”

 

“I won’t.”

 

“Why not?”

 

“I won’t because I love her.”

 

“You love her?”

 

“Yes, as a sister and a friend.” I looked at Tulre. I asked humbly, “Will you help me?”

 

He led me down the hall towards the hangar bay. Kapu followed us after spending his time running through the grounds. Once in the hangar bay, Tulre pointed to a sleek fighter ship being attended to by a strange little astromech that bleeped when he saw us. He looked like he was once top of the line but it looked like he had taken some damage. Tulre said, “That’s T3-M4. Our scouts found him wandering around the Manago Forest. Where he’s from, I have no idea.”

 

“Can he fly in a fighter?”

 

The droid beeped an affirmation and then made softer beeps as Kapu went up and started sniffing. Tulre replied, “Does that answer your question? Now this ship is different from Republic classes so I doubt that you may be greeted as a friendly.”

 

“That’s good. As long as it can fly and fight if necessary.”

 

“If you do this, remember that home can not be easily found.”

 

I nodded my thanks and left to grab what was left of my stuff. I stopped to check on Darius and Revan who were sound asleep. I gave a quick peck on Revan’s cheek and whispered softly, “I’ll be back. Just hold the line.” I didn’t know why I said it but I felt it was necessary.

 

 

The fighter was ready to go when I got back and T3 was ready to go. Kapu looked sad that he couldn’t go but Tulre opened a compartment for him and he climbed in. He looked at me and said, “May the Force be with you.”

 

I nodded and lifted off heading for Republic space. I did not know what I would find there but I hoped I would at least find him.

[Diego Varen]

Good Chapter as always.

[JediMaster12]

Chapter 13: The Diaries of the Jedi

The following are journal entries that I have recovered from that time after I left the Avalon system. Actually some were recovered and others were given to me to tell this tale.

 

-Revan-

 

We had found the academy after being attacked by the enemy. Jacen collapsed after we arrived from being in pain and was out for a day or two. I sat waiting for him to wake up and thought about the comments he shouted at me before. It was as if he knew what I was feeling or something. It had to take a master of the academy to explain why.

 

The grounds were quite beautiful, much like what I remembered at Dantooine. I stayed with Jacen for reasons that I could guess at. It wasn’t as if I had feelings for him, well I did but not the kind that I still hold for my Carth. I miss him so; the way he used to hold me at night, the kisses. I realize that my feelings must have been driving him crazy though he is too much of a gentleman to say so, except for that night he had that nightmare. Then that attack, he leaped into battle as if it were an old friend and the fact that he had suffered through that rake to the ribs. He is extraordinary and I can see why Michaela loves him and why she asked me to watch out for him.

 

These last two months have been settling and made me realize that I wasn’t alone. At least I could point that out to Jacen. When we were talking, he seemed more at peace. I guess that work that Master Tulre did with him helped. We joked a bit and I think he was embarrassed when he called me ‘Pretty Girl.’ I admit at that moment I was reminded of Carth when he used to tease me and call me his pet names. I also felt a strange attachment, as if we were family or something. I guess it had to do with the emotional bond that he formed after that incident after conclave. That night, he sounded desperate or something, kind of like how I used to have my dreams and wouldn’t tell Carth about them. I had been chasing those dreams and nightmares for four years and end up meeting someone at the end of the road. Truth be told, I came upon a person who is starting down this same path I came down. I wanted to tell him straight out but there are some things one must find out for themselves…

 

 

-Darius-

 

I admit I was impressed with the academy but I was more peeved with Jacen. He never takes claim for anything unless it is disaster but prefers to sit back and let others take the credit. It makes me so damned ashamed in that he is so selfless and so caring. He took in the boy Caelos against the possibility of danger and now the boy is being trained. He gives out kindness as if it were candy. I hope to be able to understand how his people think.

 

I admit that I was rather annoyed that Revan seemed to have feelings for him but I was mistaken. They seem to be alike in many ways that it is disturbing. I don’t know why he doesn’t trust us because he never goes into much detail about his past. Then again I never told my friends much either. Not even her. Did she ever go back to Katarr or did she stay with the others? It was only a few months ago that we were aboard the Ravager trying to destroy her former master and save Telos. I still think of her and it seemed that Jacen seemed to know but he never said anything. Tomorrow we’ll be heading out with VERY large contingent of Jedi Knights. Jacen was right. There were more Jedi than what I had known before my exile.

 

-Revan-

 

Looked for Jacen but he was not here. His bed wasn’t even slept in. I touched my cheek and had a sudden flash of him pecking my cheek and saying something like, “Hold the line.” I don’t what that means but I feel as if I let Michaela down. Worse I feel that he has started down the same route I had as I remembered our conversation last night. Kapu was not there either and I assumed that he went with his master. Wherever Jacen is surely Kapu will be there.

 

We started out after having breakfast and headed back. We had just received a transmission that the Rashikians were again attacking and trying to lay siege to Tyan-yu. I knew right away that was bad but something wasn’t right. The line was holding almost as if it were a distraction of some sort. I don’t like this. Maybe what Jacen said is right.

 

We were able to arrive just in time to drive away the Rashikians. They were the same thugs that had attacked us on the way to the academy. I noticed that our new Jedi friends fought like they did, with equal power and strength but I could sense the use of the Force as well. The battle was rather short and we won but our forces were exhausted. The men were huddled around the campfires tired and almost dispirited as I walked by to Michaela’s tent to tell her.

 

She took the news of Jacen’s departure fairly well but I sensed a change in her or maybe it was there before and I didn’t notice. I wouldn’t doubt it if she were trying to hide something from everyone. Also it was obvious that she was extremely emotional and I wondered if that was how Carth felt when I left without saying anything four years ago. Does he forgive me? I almost started to cry myself and apologize but she just put a finger to her lips. I remained quiet as she motioned for me to follow her to the herder queen’s tent. There she told me something that brought out a different side of me. I hope that Jacen will come back soon. He so needs to hear this.

[Diego Varen]

That must be the shortest Chapter you've ever wrote. Good though.

[JediMaster12]

The diaries are always short because they are certain points in time.

Glad you liked it though.

[Jae Onasi]

As always I'm enjoying the reading.

I got lost momentarily when you switched to 2 months later at the academy--I put a few asterisks in when I'm doing a scene or time break so that people know I'm moving on to something else (which I think is the convention but I'm not 100% sure).

The relationship between JC and Revan was interesting--I was beginning to wonder about those 2, you know.

Of course, now I have to hear Michaela's news, though I have my suspicions.

[JediMaster12]

Of course. Wait and see.

[JediMaster12]

Chapter 14: Old Wounds and Memories

Republic space. I never thought I would see the sights again. Telos was just ahead with Citadel Station hovering above it. I sat back in my seat and just gazed at the planet as we approached. T3 beeped to bring me out of my reverie. I answered, “You know where to land?”

 

Beepbooop

 

“Alright then guide the ship in,” I replied.

 

T3 was a resourceful little guy and he seemed to know where to go. If I didn’t know any better he had been there before. I had no idea what to expect so I pulled my hood over. It didn’t look like traditional Jedi robes so I thought that I might be able to get away with it. I ejected T3 and opened the cargo hold for Kapu and got out of the fighter. I decided to leave my lightsaber in the fighter to prevent any unnecessary unpleasantness. We left the hangar bay and headed for the shuttle to take us to the entertainment module.

 

The cantina was loud and full of people. I left T3 and Kapu outside since I didn’t know how people would react to a wolf and a droid inside a cantina. I left my hood up for I wanted to be left alone while I conducted my search. I passed the pazaak tables and watched a bit as the players played for high stakes. I passed these guys and headed straight for the bar. I stood at the counter and ordered a gentle alcohol drink. I stood there and just sipped my drink when a young punk came up and asked, “You wanna buy some spice sticks?”

 

I used my Jedi mind trick, “You don’t want to sell me spice sticks.”

 

Almost mechanically he replied, “I don’t wanna sell ya spice sticks.”

 

“You want to go home and think about your life.”

 

“I wanna go home and think about my life,” and he took off. I smiled and continued to sip my drink. I could sense through the drunkenness that many people came here to drown out their sorrows and pain. A typical thing I guess. Getting drunk always seemed to stop the pain even if it was only temporary.

 

I was minding my business when a female Twi’lek tapped my shoulder and asked in a seductive voice, “Hey handsome. What’s a fellow like you doin’ in a place like this all alone?”

 

“Just mindin’ my business,” I replied. I could smell powerful alcohol on her and I didn’t want to get into any entanglements.

 

Apparently she wasn’t satisfied with my answer and she leaned in close. She made her lips turn into a pout and said, “Come on handsome. Surely we could have a little fun?” and she placed her arms around my neck.

 

I took her hands and was trying to unclasp them from my neck when I received a rude shove from my left. We both tripped and she fell and I gripped the counter to keep from falling over. I heard a gruff voice say, “Talkin’ to my girl?”

 

I straightened my hood and looked to find a rather angry and slightly drunk human staring at me and holding a blaster pointed at me. I stood up slowly and tried to calm him down, “I was just having a drink here and I told her I didn’t want company.”

 

“Did ya? It looked like you wanted something,” and he poked his blaster at my middle.

 

“Sir, you don’t want to do that.” A crowd had started to form around us and I had the unpleasant feeling that this was not going to go down well. I silently wanted to curse myself for leaving my lightsaber behind but I was convinced that it was for the best. From what I had learned from Darius, Jedi were not very welcome at this point. I forced my self to remain calm and maintained my strong posture. The Twi’lek woman who had fallen had stood up and had moved away slightly.

 

The bully grabbed her by the arm and pulled her viciously to him. He sneered at me and said, “Don’t do what? You afraid to get a little down and dirty?” He again jabbed the weapon at me.

 

Maintaining my calm, I spoke, “Sir, I don’t want to cause a problem. This incident is not worth the effort. Let me get you another drink,” and I made a motion to summon the bartender. What happened next probably was somewhat for the best.

 

The human then grabbed me and threw me across the room and into a table. He aimed his blaster at me. I made a charge to disarm him using the hand-to-hand maneuvers that Cronus taught me in addition to lightsaber forms. Once I managed to wrench the blaster away from his hand, I was greeted with a punch across the face that sent me to the floor. The angry human jumped on top of me and began to punch me wherever he could make a contact. I blocked most of his blows but he managed to get a few in.

 

We managed to get to our feet and he pushed me away. Somehow he managed grab a hold of a few bottles and began to throw them at me. I managed to duck and my hood came off in the process. He then grabbed something heavier, a chair and ran at me swinging. I tried ducking but he gave me a good clout at my ribs. I then grabbed it and flung it away but he gave me another good punch. I fell and landed on the ground. He jumped on me and tried to strangle me.

 

At that moment, the authorities came in and began trying to break it up. At that instant, Kapu came running in, as always to my rescue and gave the guy a huge bite on his rear. The drunk stood up and tried to make a swipe, but Kapu growled at him and bared his teeth. The TSF pointed their guns at us and told us to stand down and that we were being arrested for disturbing the peace. I was still on the ground trying to get up while my ribs burned like fire. I guessed that they may have been broken but I guess that was nothing compared to my face, which was starting to welt where he hit me.

 

The lieutenant of the TSF told the both of us to put our hands up. Kapu was growling. I said softly, “Kahae, washte washte,” and he calmed down and laid down. He still gave a low growl in his throat. I winced slightly as I raised my hands and indicated that I had nothing in my hands. One of the officers slapped some cuffs on my wrists and led us both out. Kapu submitted to a collar and followed. As we were leaving, I noticed T3 hiding and waiting to follow. I had no idea what was going to happen. I thought to my self, Great. Your first day here and already you are going to prison.

 

 

“You will stay here until we can sort out the mess in the cantina,” the lieutenant known as Dol Grenn said to us as he activated the force cages. A chain in the wall restrained Kapu and I could tell he didn’t like it. He laid down with his head on his forepaws and just gazed at the door. I winced as I sat on the ground of my cell and replaced my hood on my head. I noticed a small cut on the top of my wrist, which I healed quietly using Force Heal. I painfully drew my knees up and wrapped my arms around my legs and placed my head down on my knees.

 

The drunk was mad and was saying, “Grrr. When I get out of here I’m gonna rip your head off.”

 

I ignored him and just closed my eyes to try and sleep my pain off. As I dozed I began to hear whispers through the Force. Mostly they were lessons that Tergis taught me growing up. They were more of a comfort as I sat there in that position for what seemed like hours than staring at the wall. Gradually the pain dulled to a bearable level but it was still there. I didn’t say anything about it. In fact I remained silent the entire time.

 

It must have been a whole day or something when Lieutenant Grenn came back in the room. Kapu lifted his head but didn’t move. I just raised my head and placed my chin on my knees so I could hear what he had to say. He deactivated my cage and said, “Due to the security recordings that we recovered we discovered that you did not throw the first punch nor start the fight. Therefore, you are to be released and placed under house arrest until you can be summoned to the Telosian government council and your identity confirmed.”

 

I just looked at the lieutenant and motioned my head towards Kapu. He apparently caught my meaning and replied, “Yes, he will be released too but he is to be kept tethered at all times. If you just come with me, we will get your paperwork sorted out.”

 

I slowly lifted myself to a standing position. I must have winced from my ribs for the lieutenant said, “Why don’t we do that later and get you to the medbay.”

 

I never made it to where he was standing. I woke up on a bed hearing a voice talk to the lieutenant. It was more of a scolding as to why I wasn’t given any medical treatment sooner. It gave me a headache and I think my moaning distracted them. I sat up only to be restrained and told that I needed to be examined. I resisted because I was getting tired of being manhandled and touched. I voiced out, “Just leave me alone. I want to leave.”

 

“Calm down there,” the doctor said.

 

I jumped to my feet and made way for the door. I turned to the lieutenant and said, “Just show me where to go so I can get this mess over with.”

 

Seeing that I was that insistent, the lieutenant summoned one of his officers and instructed them to take me to the apartment. I didn’t see the officer in the shadows watching me nor did I sense his emotions for I was thoroughly annoyed. Kapu was waiting outside the apartment along with T3. How he managed to find me, I had no idea. I got the feeling that this little droid was capable of a lot of things. The officer left me alone in the apartment with my companions.

 

The apartment was simply furnished, almost as if it were a rest point. Along the wall was a communicator for the most part being silent. I ran my fingers along the furniture and the communicator. I got a sudden vision of Darius, a fool and an old woman resting in here. I realized that Darius must have come here and stayed here before. I removed my hand from the surface of the comm and moved towards the window. I slowly sat in the same position as I had in the cell and fell asleep and hoped that this would be over soon. Kapu nestled next to me and T3 took position near the comm and all was quiet.

 

 

“Hmm. I thought you’d be a little more older up close and personal,” a gruff voice sounded.

 

I woke up and looked up to see an old bald man with kind eyes and a gray-white beard standing and staring down at me. I cocked my left eyebrow but didn’t say anything. I could sense that he meant no harm and apparently Kapu didn’t either for he was still snoozing by me. I didn’t move but gazed into those eyes that looked as if he were judging me. When I didn’t say anything he said, “I see you are not a talkative thing judging by how still you are. Heck a tach would have eaten you by now. Maybe it will make you a willing listener. I never thought I’d see the day when a Jedi would get himself involved in a bar fight. Yes, yes I know you are a Jedi. You send it out like a viper kinrath tail gland.”

 

An amused grin spread across my face as I listened to him. I had a sudden flash of this same old man five years earlier telling someone that he was old and allowed to be enigmatic. I guess it annoyed him slightly for he said, “So now I am amusing to you. You’re just as bad as someone I knew,” and his voice drifted. I removed my grin and sat up straighter to show that I was willing to listen. He continued, “I don’t know why you are here or where you came from but I am guessing that is not happy news.”

 

The old man talked some more but I was getting drowsy. I guess he could see that for he muttered, “Inconsiderate little…” I feel back asleep. I don’t know if it was a dream or something but I do remember feeling exhausted and I just couldn’t take the rambling anymore. So I slept, for how long? I don’t know but I do remember waking up or something.

 

A fool was approaching an old woman. He said, “Explain something to me.”

 

“I do not have the years required nor the desire to entertain you.”

 

“He’s a Jedi right? I thought they were supposed to be tough, capable.”

 

“Yes and what are they without the Force? Take the greatest Jedi Knight and strip away the Force. They rely on it depend on it more than they know. Watch as one tries to hold a blaster or a lightsaber and you see nothing more than a man, a woman or a child”

 

“But to lose so much…”

 

“He has been gone from war for quite some time. It is conflict that strengthens us and isolation that erodes us. Add that he turned away from war, did everything to forget it and the last piece clicks into place. But we have spoken enough of this and we do a great disservice to him by not speaking of it when he is present.”

 

The image faded and I heard a noise and a voice…

 

 

Lt. Grenn had entered just as I opened my eyes. I stood slowly allowing my stiff muscles to stretch. I adjusted my hood as he said, “We have further investigated and you are not to be charged. You are free to leave when you wish. Your ship is waiting in the hangar and will be released as soon as you fill out the paperwork.”

 

I gave no response and he didn’t expect any so he turned and left. I stifled a slight yawn and tied a rope to Kapu’s collar, courtesy of the TSF. T3 warbled that he was ready to go. We left the apartment and headed to the TSF headquarters to pick up my ship. For some reason I wanted to get off that planet, mainly because of that dream/vision I had. The other was that there was a constant haze of uneasiness throughout the station. It looked and felt thick.

[Diego Varen]

This must be about the Exile. I liked that time you used the line from AotC. Can't wait for more.

[JediMaster12]

Oh yeah. Jacen finds out quite a bit. Will post the next chapter soon.

[Jae Onasi]

Heh, Jolee showing up here....Is he going to join the group, too?

[JediMaster12]

Just wait and see.

[Diego Varen]

If he is, there would be more humour. If anyone has total writing domination over him, it's Jae.

[Jae Onasi]

^

Pottsie, you're funny. Total writing domination.

 

Jolee's his own man, and I have no doubt that lots of people have fun things for him to say.

[JediMaster12]

Chapter 15: Diaries of the Jedi Part II

Some more journal entries that I had been able to recover. These were all in regard to my ‘imprisonment.’

 

-Revan-

It has been a month since Jacen had left and the war is going poorly for us. We have had as many as six battles but they have left our forces drained and in despair. We were lucky that there were no space battles yet. I can’t imagine the fact of facing another bombardment like the one that rained down on us after conclave nor do I look forward to the prospect of fighting as I did during the Mandalorian Wars and the war against Malak.

 

The battles themselves perplex me to some degree, actually a great deal. Every time we have engaged the Rashikians, they attack, fighting fiercely as if with the intent to conquer but then they pull back but not without inflicting heavy casualties to our troops. Looking at these battles in hindsight, I think this is a deliberate attempt to weaken us for a final battle. I can’t help but wonder if Jacen was right about what he said before he left, that it was coming for him, whatever it was. I asked Master Tulre what he meant by it but the master just shook his head and said that there are some things that never truly leave us. That they were always one step behind us and if we didn’t confront them, they would come after us. This I cannot understand and yet I do. I there are some things that I remember doing when I was a Sith Lord that haunt me still but I can’t imagine them physically hunting me. It is disturbing…

 

During our last battle, Darius was wounded but not too bad. Naomi has a remarkable skill at healing as well as those from the other tribes. Darius will have a slight scar on his shoulder but other than that he will be fine. Others were not so lucky. Not a day goes by when I walk past the tents that I heard the soft songs of death coming from the people. How they still manage to sing the soul to the netherworld in a time like this is beyond rational thought. I personally think that it is a great strength within. Then again, they have been fighting for years before I came and they know what to expect, death. I know this must be hard on Darius considering that he too had changed but since Malachor V. This war will change all of us. Even if we do defeat the great evil, it will still come. If one thing that I learned from Tulre it was that everything needs to be in balance. You can’t have one without the other. Funny how the Jedi on Dantooine and Coruscant viewed things in a similar fashion.

 

 

Today was another drill for the soldiers and a day of meditating for the Jedi. It was annoying to do but the warriors place a great emphasis on being prepared and ready to fight. Huh, just like Canderous and my bloodthirsty droid. I wonder how they are faring considering that Darius had left them behind along with the Ebon Hawk. That ship has so many memories in it now. A cruel thought entered my head as to what would happen if Jacen should set foot in that ship but I chastised myself. That was not a kind thing but I thought it slightly amusing when he was angry or did something funny because he couldn’t distinguish the difference. It made him less reserved and more open. Golly he was just as bad as Carth when I first tried to open up with him. Just the mere thought of our fights then can make me mad and laugh.

 

Michaela is doing fine. She has been working hard for the past month helping when she can and caring for the wounded. I get the feeling that she would rather be out there fighting alongside the men but she took it with such grace. I often had to scold her along with Nayana and Naomi about watching what she was doing and to take it easy. It makes me wonder if I was ever that bad with Carth. I don’t know but I grow more worried not just for Michaela but for the others who couldn’t fight. They were the most vulnerable and I wonder how we would be ever able to protect them.

 

 

-Jolee-

I could sense the boy right before I even met him. He was like a beacon crying out through the Force and yet such a strange beacon. Hmm, I don’t know if he is too clever or too dumb especially the way he got into that bar fight. I shouldn’t be too hard on the boy. At least he’s got a backbone when standing up to a challenge.

 

When I first met him, he looked like a brown covered lump huddled by the wall with his pet beside him. At first I thought the thing was going to bite me but all it did was just acknowledge my presence, much like the inattentive youth sitting on the ground. When I finally managed to get him to wake up he looked at me with a set of green eyes with flecks of gold dancing near the pupils. I admit that I was stunned by the look of them. He never removed his hood but I could see a faint scar on his left eyebrow that was noticeable when he cocked it at me. He was brown haired with two stray locks. I wanted to chuckle a bit as that reminded me of Carth. Bah, enough with the sentiments. I had enough when he told us that she had left.

 

I just talked to him trying to draw some sort of response from the boy but he remained silent. Personally I thought he would be a mouthy little thing like she was when I first met her. He just gazed at me with them eyes. He didn’t even flinch when I mentioned that I knew he was a Jedi though he did have the nerve to chuckle at me. I could see that he knew something; it was in his eyes. For a minute I thought that I saw his thoughts or a vision, bah. What do I know? More likely it was something that I was hoping for. Anyway, I could tell he was not a Jedi in the traditional sense of the word and I made a mention note to mention it to Carth. At least I won’t go half senile about this.

 

When I saw that he was getting sleepy and yawning at me, I wrapped it up. I spent a good twenty minutes talking to him and he yawns at me! Funny thing was he didn’t even move from his position. He had his knees drawn up and his arms wrapped around them and his head on his knees. That would have my old limbs cry out for a stretch. Young people. I sighed and left his apartment, making sure that the guards didn’t remember me. I went directly to Carth and told him what I found out. I could tell that he would have barged in and done and interrogation but I was more cautious. I told the sonny to hold on and just watch him. Somehow I had a feeling that he was here for a reason and I wanted to be certain of it.

 

After speaking to Carth I went to the docks. I had a feeling that the lad would have wanted to leave as soon as he could. Who could blame him? I will say this though, when I saw him fight in the cantina, he was really something. I had never seen such a good fight, except for maybe Canderous. Hehe. Now I have a good memory of the brute even though I never saw eye to eye with him.

[Diego Varen]

Good Chapter or Diary enteries. No Exile enteries. Then again, that was done in the previous Chapter. Jolee is just as funny as in Jae's Fanfic. I doubt I could really make him funny.

 

I quote Jolee here by saying, "Bah enough of my ramblings, I can't wait for the next Chapter."

[Jae Onasi]

When I read through the diary endings, I realized that sometimes the characters sound a little too much alike. You caught Jolee's speech mannerisms pretty well and I could tell it was him. Jacen, Darius, and Revan should sound different from each other, and right now I feel like they all sound a little too much like Jacen, if that makes any sense whatsoever. I don't think you'll have to do much to achieve that, however--slightly different speech mannerisms maybe? Slightly different vocabulary? Wish I had an intelligent suggestion for you on that. I have to go research that one myself, because now it's going to drive me nuts til I can learn just what the correct literary term is.

 

I had fun reading Jolee's little comments.

[JediMaster12]

Thanks Jae. We'll see what I can do. I try to think about it. I guess what I was tryin get at was that they all seem to understand one another and yet they don't. Let's see what else pops up.

[JediMaster12]

Chapter 16: Meetings and Distrust

As soon as I was able, I took off and decided to head for NarShadaa. I don’t know why but I had remembered that Darius mentioned NarShadaa when he had arrived. I figured that might be a good place to refuel and get some provisions considering that it is the smuggler’s moon. T3 warbled that it would be a good place. I think the little guy knew something that I didn’t about this place.

 

When we approached the smuggler’s moon, T3 beeped in excitement. He had located a landing pad with a ship and was telling me to set down there. I saw that there was plenty of room for the both of us so I brought the fighter down. I was perfectly willing to let T3 call a few shots here in the Outer Rim since I hadn’t been here in years. I landed without so much as a hitch and released the hatch for Kapu and T3. I stood up and jumped out. This time I was going to play it smart and take my lightsaber.

 

I had just locked the cockpit and started walking towards the main part of the sector when I was stopped by a, “Hey you!”

 

I turned to see a dark haired man that I instantly recognized as the fool in my dream on Telos. He was wearing grey Jedi robes and was holding a hydrospanner as if he were trying to make repairs. I was going to say something when a droid came out wielding a huge blaster and said, “Query: Is there someone that needs to be killed Fool Meatbag?”

 

When I heard the word ‘meatbag’ I busted out with a laugh that clearly started to annoy the dark haired fool. T3 bleeped from behind me and the droid with the blaster stood down not without saying, “Statement: The Handsome Meatbag is a friend. Apparently a friend of the Master.”

 

I didn’t miss the ‘handsome’ part and thought that this psycho droid had a sense of humor but just how much was something that I would find out later. I was still chuckling when the dark haired man said, “All right stop. What in space are you doing with that T3 unit? Who are you?”

 

I knew better than to tease but I couldn’t resist, “I found him. He led me to a fool and a psycho droid.”

 

“Statement: The Handsome Meatbag has a sense of humor. An admirable quality. Much like my Master,” and the thing sighed.

 

“Thank you,” I said with a mock serious look. Then being gentle I answered his question, “I’m Jacen Credo and the wolf is Kapu. As to the T3 unit, he came with my ship. What’s it to you?”

 

“Well I’m Atton. Atton Rand and I have been trying to fix this bucket of bolts ever since Darius left. Now that you brought our T3 unit back, we can get this rust bucket space worthy and burn sky.”

 

T3 began to shrilly beep. Apparently he didn’t want to leave me, or something. Half of the beeps were protest and others were cussing that had me shocked. I stopped it by saying, “Alright T3. You’re not going anywhere. I’m sure we can work something out.”

 

“Hey something wrong?” a voice sounded from the ramp.

 

“Statement: An altercation was about to happen between the Fool Meatbag and the Handsome Meatbag though sadly it did not get bloody.”

 

“Stay out of it Mira.”

 

“Ya know Atton if you were a little more nicer someone would dump you out of an airlock,” the woman, Mira replied.

 

I could see that this could be an awkward situation so I tried to calm everyone down by saying, “Look I don’t want any trouble. My T3 unit…”

 

“Your T3 unit? That’s our T3 unit,” the dark haired man known as Atton interrupted.

 

I responded, “My T3 unit indicated that this was the landing pad to land on. If I intruded on your space, then I’ll move my ship elsewhere. Either that or I could probably help you fix the ship and earn my spot.”

 

“No dice,” Atton said. Apparently he was trying to square me up and see what I was going to do. Damn Darius. You never told me how tender hooked your friends were.

 

Mira by now had made her way down the ramp of the freighter looking at me. She was rather petite but I could tell that looks could be deceiving. She was well built and physically fit as if she may have been a warrior or a bounty hunter or something. Her orange red hair was like the crystals used for the unique lightsabers and her eyes and interesting shade of brown. She interrupted my thoughts when she said, “Well one thing is for certain, HK knows a good man when he sees one.” She then looked at me as if to size me up. She then asked, “Just what are you doing here, Handsome?”

 

To be honest I was rather taken aback by the coming on by various women. I didn’t want to get into another mess like on Telos so I just backed away slowly as if I wanted to bolt. When I was what a sure safe distance away, I said, “I am looking for someone. Maybe you can help?”

 

“Sure but why did you move away? Afraid I’m gonna jab ya with a Bothan stunner?” Mira asked a bit playfully. I could tell then that she used her beauty to capture her targets. It was actually quite amusing.

 

Atton was actually impatient and tried to make a move for T3. Needless to say, Kapu broke the ice by giving a lunge that had Atton fall backwards and into a can of grease that he had been working with. Kapu was still growling and barking. Apparently he thought that little droid was his and he aimed to defend it. Mira was laughing at Atton covered in grease and T3 was beeping doing what I think was laughing as well. While they were laughing, they didn’t notice the shadows creeping up on us. The presence was familiar, like what happened on the mountain trail.

 

I think I startled them when I made a huge Force Jump, igniting my lightsaber in the process and started swinging at the air. When I struck one of our attackers on the arm, he reappeared. I recognized him as a Rashikian and proceeded to make the other four appear. By the time this occurred, Atton and Mira had their lightsabers out and were swinging them at their attackers. The stench of burnt flesh and grease penetrated my nose like a bad stink of Bantha poodoo. This group was a lot tougher to beat as they dodged our strikes and laid down powerful ones of their own. I remember growing tired as I locked my blade with the Rashikian’s sword. With were both pressing hard against each other and our blades were crossed at an angle allowing us to look at each other’s face.

 

The Rashikian gave a menacing, evil smile and said in the corrupted language, “He was right. You are strong. You have fear, anger, hate and yet you don’t use them. They are buried deep.” Then in Avalonian he said, “You don’t think you can defeat us and what is to come,” and with a hard shove he pushed me back onto the ground. With a flip, I jumped up and twirled my double bladed saber and got into position. He was amused that I was persistent and came at me swinging hard. I played it smart and he played into my hands. With deft twists, I had cut the arm off wielding the sword and he fell to the ground. I stood there looking at him and shut my blade off and kneeled to look him in the eye.

 

By this time, Atton, Mira, and to some extent the psycho killer droid managed to down the other three. I think Kapu helped for he was growling but whimpering at some point. They joined me as I was kneeling next to the Rashikian. I demanded that he tell me who was the he and why was he following me in Avalonian. All he did was laugh and say in Basic, “No matter where you run it will find you. We are everywhere; we are watching you. He is watching you,” and he injected himself with a poison I didn’t see and he died.

 

I stood up slowly and looked at the body. All that came out of my mouth was, “They are here.”

 

 

The common room of the Ebon Hawk, as the stock freighter was called, was a little cozy in that ship way. I was sitting at the table with Kapu at my feet. His shoulder was stitched up and on the mend, nothing serious. T3 was going about making repairs. I was actually thinking about what the Rashikian had said. It couldn’t be true. Could they have infiltrated the Republic without them knowing? Why are they showing themselves now? Why?

 

“I told you he’s mental,” Atton was saying. I broke out of my reverie to hear him say, “Mental.”

 

“Shut up Atton. He probably knows what that thing was and what it was saying,” Mira was saying.

 

I turned to see the two of them arguing. I rolled my eyes and stood up. Softly I said, “Yes I do know. He is from where I am from.”

 

“Really. Why should we even trust you? After all you talk like them, you stole our T3 unit…”

 

“He knows where Darius is,” a sultry voice sounded. A woman with a veil over her eyes approached us. She came right up to me and turned her head to look at my face. She spoke again, “He knows where he is and,” she touched my cheek, “he knows that the enemy is here.”

 

There was actually a dumbfounded silence from everyone. I was slightly mesmerized by this woman dressed in dark magenta clothing and her veil was something of a mystery. I had closed my eyes when she touched my cheek and I reached out with my senses. I then saw her as she was. I opened my eyes and saw that I was getting a strange look from everyone. I just said, “What? I never met a Miraluka before nor did I meet someone attached to Darius.”

 

Apparently that broke the ice and I answered questions as to the whereabouts of Darius and what not. They seemed sad that I couldn’t just give them the coordinates to my home. I couldn’t because a matter needed to get settled and the sooner that I found Carth or whoever was in charge of the fleet, the better. I made apologies and explained that I had to warn the Republic with Atton snickering at me. I started to head to my fighter and T3 started to beep sadly. I could tell that he was torn between staying and going. I swear the little droid had more of an attachment issue than me. I told him he could stay and I couldn’t help but make the snide comment at Atton, “At least you’ll get the Hawk working better than the fool.”

 

“Statement: I have the desire to travel with the Handsome Meatbag. If he knows where the Exile Meatbag has gone then he surely knows where my Master has gone as well.”

 

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. The last thing I wanted was a psycho killer machine following me and threatening to shoot everything that moved. I said, “Thanks, but I’ll pass.”

 

“Yeah and maybe when your done playing politics you can come back and fight like a real Jedi,” Atton said, “or at least tell us where to go.”

 

“Go with the Force,” the Miraluka said, “we will wait until you give the word.”

 

I merely nodded and opened the hatch for Kapu who settled in. I jumped in the cockpit and sat pinching the bridge of my nose and sighing relief. Man Darius. Where did you pick up this crew?

 

I took off not noticing that they were watching me leave or that the same balding, wrinkly Jedi that I listened to on Telos approached them.

 

**************************************************

I had fun figuring out HK's dialogue considering his bloody and violent nature. I tried to convey the characters that I mentioned as best that I could.

[Diego Varen]

Nice to see Atton and the others. Good Chapter as always and it's nice to see J.C. again. Will we see Revan, Jolee and the Exile again?

[JediMaster12]

Just wait and see. Patience for the Jedi it is time to eat as well.

[Diego Varen]

... And sleep...

[JediMaster12]

Chapter 17: Lights and Sights

I admit that I was glad to get away from them especially Mira and the Miraluka. It was disturbing that Mira hit on me and I didn’t end up in a bar fight and it was even more disturbing when the Miraluka touched me as if she were trying to see my soul. I was reluctant to leave T3 behind but I figured that if the Hawk was in better shape, they could meet up with Darius later.

 

I wasn’t stupid and I made it to Coruscant without any problems, except for the demanding of an ID signature. I had a sheer second of terror that they might fire upon me because the fighter’s ID signature was not in any of the databanks. I forced myself to remain calm and I sent it. My fears were unfounded as I was allowed to land on a docking platform, at least that is what I thought it was. I was feeling sleepy from the long travel and envied Kapu. At least he got to sleep during the long flight to Coruscant.

 

I was so sleepy I wasn’t paying attention to what kind of platform it was or where it was. I just let Kapu out and let myself out but failed to put my hood on. I just stood and gazed at the lights and sights. I had nearly forgotten. A funny feeling came to mind but I heard that psycho droid’s voice in my head as he said, “Very pretty.” I shrugged my shoulders overcome with tiredness and tried to stifle a yawn. Damn, that psycho droid grows on you, in a way.

 

I was leaning against the fighter and watching the sun go down. Kapu had circled the fighter twice and then laid down to watch as well. He hardly limped which was a good sign, as that little slash didn’t cause too much damage. I glanced down and made sure that he was fine and then continued to watch the sunset. I began to doze off leaning against the fighter and feeling the warm sun on my face. I must have been exhausted for I did not sense nor see someone come up behind me.

 

“Hey. What are you doing here?” a little voice was saying.

 

I felt a push on my left shoulder. Someone was trying to wake me up. I reluctantly surrendered my slumber and slowly opened my eyes. My eyes didn’t focus properly but I got a hint of a blue face and a kid-like expression. For some reason I blurted out, “Mission do you have any idea what time it is?”

 

My eyes focused and I instantly recognized the blue Twi’lek that I had a brief image of when I was on the trail to the academy. She looked frightened at me but she drew a modified blaster and pointed it at me. Her voice came firm, “Look, I don’t know how you know my name but I am not gonna ask ya this again, what are you doing here?”

 

I gazed around and realized that I was on a private landing pad. I thought to

myself, Why did they tell me to land here? Why did I call her Mission? I just looked at the young Twi’lek woman and looked even more at the blaster she was holding, pointed now directly at my head. I slowly raised my hands and spoke as calmly as I could, “Look, I was told to land here. I didn’t know that this belonged to someone.”

 

“Who are you?”

 

“Jacen. Jacen Cirrus.” Slowly I moved my robe aside to reveal my lightsaber hanging from my belt. “See. I’m a Jedi.”

 

She lowered her weapon and asked, “Then why aren’t ya at the Temple? They got a new council there, trying to rebuild.”

 

“I have been away for quite a time.”

 

I guess Mission seemed to trust me for she holstered her blasters. I lowered my hands. She said, “Yeah. Probably been hidin’ huh? I mean…”

 

“Well…I have been near the Outer Rim for awhile…and beyond that,” I said. Something told me that this little Twi’lek was special, at least to Revan, almost like sisters. I smiled at the thought for that fit the Revan that I had met when she crash-landed on my world.

 

“Did you see Revan?” The question shocked me.

 

“What?”

 

“Well, if you went beyond the Outer Rim, then maybe you might have seen Revan. She left a little over four years ago and didn’t say why. At least she could have left a note or something,” and Mission’s voice trailed off a bit.

 

“She didn’t say anything?”

 

“No. It was hard especially for Carth. I bet it was even worse for her. They fancied each other.”

 

It wasn’t how I would put it considering I had a front row seat foray into her feelings about three months ago. Still I could see that this was hard on the kid and I was tired of keeping secrets. So I gently said, “Yeah I know. I met her and she’s fine. Sad but fine.”

 

Her little face looked at me with a shocked expression. She could barely string her words together, “You… know? Where is she?”

 

I could see that in spite of her tough façade, she was still just a kid. I saw some tears brimming to her eyes and in a reaction I reached out to hug her. I whispered softly, “She’s alive on my homeworld. Possibly close to twelve parsecs from Rakata Prime.”

 

The little Twi’lek looked at me and gave a strange look. She stepped back and studied my face as if she were trying to believe it. I didn’t have to read her thoughts to see that she could hardly believe that there was another planet besides the one she crash-landed on five years ago. It must have been about two minutes before she asked, “Why are you here?”

 

Personally I was amazed at how people could think one thing but keep attention focused on business. Then again, Avalonians did a lot of double talk and multiple meanings when keeping secrets. I replied with a question, “Would you believe me if I said that I came to stop a great evil that has already infiltrated the Outer Rim?”

 

“I wouldn’t have a hard time believing that sonny. I was wondering when you’d finally work up a nerve to talk,” a voice came to my left.

 

I turned to see the wrinkled old man that I had seen on Telos looking at me. Behind him were two others, Jedi. One looked like a cat and the other was a human. I began to get an uncomfortable feeling that they might gain up on me. I started to back away slowly and pressed my back against my ship. I couldn’t sense anything from the old man but the two Jedi behind him had a plethora of emotions that flooded my senses and caused apprehensions.

 

I guess Jolee noticed that for he said, “Calm down sonny. We’re not going to attack you. I wouldn’t considering how well you fought those creatures on NarShadaa. Heh, just like when I used to fight only against smugglers and the like.”

 

I merely kept a wide-eyed expression looking at them. I was still pressing my back into the ship. I briefly closed my eyes and sifted through my thoughts. I opened my eyes and looked at the three of them. I slowly started to speak, “Look if I landed here on your landing pad, it is a mistake. I’ll move it and everything can just blow over.”

 

“Hey, don’t leave,” Mission said, “Jolee’s too old to be fighting a young guy like you. Besides I think they’d want to hear what you have to say.” She gave me a reassuring smile. I guess she trusted me, or something.

 

I stayed there but was less pressed against the fighter as I started to relax. Four pairs of eyes were looking at me. Kapu by this time had woken up and surveyed the scene. His pronounced judgment was that they were not a threat so I relaxed. I asked, “What would you like to know?”

 

They asked me questions about Revan and if I knew where she was and the like. I told the truth of how we met and what was going on my homeworld. When I got to the part of my suspicion that the creatures that Jolee saw me fight had already invaded Republic space in the Outer Rim, they became quiet. I knew that they didn’t want to fight another war, the Republic was trying to heal. I did say that it could have been that they are trying to draw the Republic into fighting and that I could be wrong about everything. Jolee, who had been the deepest of listeners said, “No, you are not. You came here for a reason and your basis is a solid one. They are here to conquer.”

 

“That is why I came to Coruscant to talk to whoever is in charge of the Fleet. This may be the beginning of a long war I’ll admit that but I get the feeling that it will be closer to my home,” I said. “So, if you could direct me to the right place, I’ll just go there…”

 

“Sonny, don’t tell us these things and expect us to just accept them. We are Jedi, or at least I was. It is the duty of the Jedi to protect the galaxy. We’ll come with you and I suspect your ‘friends’ on NarShadaa will too. Besides you don’t need to go anywhere. The person you need to talk to lives here,” and with a deft motion, the old man shooed Mission and the other two out to leave me there on the platform.

 

I watched them leave and then turning around to gaze at the lights. Night had fallen and it was a sight to see. A voice then sounded behind me, “Beautiful isn’t it. Not like Telos however.”

 

I spun around to face…

 

**************************************************

 

Three hours later I had finished telling my tale and my true reasons for coming here. Carth’s face didn’t try hard to hide the tears that were threatening to fall. He was so relieved that Revan was alive and his emotions were overpowering mine. I had let down the blocks that Tulre had been teaching me. I guess I felt that if I absorbed his pain, it would become less. I could feel the same feelings that Revan felt and I understood better why she was full of regret. I admit I had the crude thoughts of the young since he was graying slightly at the temples but just looking at him, it made sense.

 

When Carth controlled himself he smiled and said, “Well I guess the only thing to do is to give help.”

 

“I know we are not members of the Republic but…” I started.

 

“I know and I saw in the records that the Jedi helped your world on numerous occasions and you did the same,” Carth replied when the comm beeped. He left to go answer it and I went to stare out the windows. I could see memories dancing in my mind, mostly of kisses and love phrases. I shook my head and started walking towards where Carth had left. I was about to pass a room when I heard a conversation going on between Carth and one of his officers.

 

“Admiral, one of our convoys has just been ambushed near Tatooine and we are taking heavy losses.”

 

“Can you get an ID on the attackers?”

 

“No sir, the ships are nothing like what we have encountered before. They don’t even register as Sith ships.”

 

“Do what you can captain, I’ll send reinforcements. Admiral Onasi out.”

 

I had slipped away so he wouldn’t find me there. I guess he figured that I knew for he said after coming out of the room, “Well, I guess the enemy is here. Let’s go.”

[Diego Varen]

Good Chapter. It was nice to see Mission again. Bring on more KOTOR or TSL Party Members.

[JediMaster12]

Chapter 18: Confrontations and Plans

Three months after meeting Admiral Onasi and we are still stuck here in the Outer Rim fighting the Rashikians. They were quite tactical in their maneuvers and they drove the battles hard. Right now the fleet is massing near Yavin IV for another round and I despair. It seemed as if we were getting nowhere with this battles. True we have pushed the Rashikians back further away from Republic space but they are stubborn as a mynock when attached to power cables and it is frustrating. I also miss my wife and my home, well I just wanted to be wherever she was and I was not alone there.

 

Carth and I became good friends though I probably wouldn’t say the best of friends. Maybe it was brought on by a slight bit of jealousy when I admitted that Revan kissed me and I her. He did get over it when I explained that it was simply etiquette for my people and he was more agreeable after that. He held me a bit at arms length until I saved his butt from being blasted into space dust. He made it up to me by putting me in charge of red group. At least I had T3 back.

 

It was a reunion and yet a standoff when the Ebon Hawk joined us after we arrived at Tatooine. It took all the diplomatic skills in my arsenal to prevent Atton and Carth from getting into a kerfuffle. I could have done without HK spouting out statements such as, “Statement: The Republic Meatbag will surely beat the Fool Meatbag,” and, “Statement: Handsome Meatbag please let me enjoy the potential for hostilities.” That last comment had Carth laughing at me and me pinching the bridge of my nose and shaking my head.

 

T3 was a happy little droid after ‘dancing’ around Carth and then me. I still think he has attachment issues. Right away he wanted to be my astromech in my fighter. The Miraluka, whom I learned was called Visas Marr had gone to her home Katarr and back and she was there. In fact, everyone was there that had some connection to Revan or Darius. Mission was a stubborn kid and insisted on coming even though the parent in Carth told her it was too dangerous. I sided with her after making her promise to follow all orders to the letter. I guess we were just one big happy family, well almost.

 

 

Truth be told I was highly agitated and I ruled it out that it was nobody else’s feelings but my own. I was agitated that the Rashikians were toying with us, like they had the upper edge. For the past few weeks I had been toying with an idea that may have profound effects but it would push the Rashikians back to Avalon space and we could round them up. I also toyed with the possibility that it was exactly what they wanted. I guess I was becoming paranoid over the whole thing. I could see what Revan meant when she once told me that Carth was paranoid when she first met him and why she made the comment that I was just like him. It didn’t help that I never admitted to anyone what that Rashikian had told me when we fought on NarShadaa.

 

I guess Jolee must have sensed my agitation and he tried to get me to talk about it. When I didn’t, he called me an ‘ungrateful whippersnapper’ and a bunch of other things. I responded that I just didn’t feel ready to talk yet. After that it seemed like everyone tried to get me to talk about what was bothering me. The only ones who didn’t were the droids, Visas and Carth being that I guess that they had an idea of my feelings at one point and were content to leave me alone. At one point I exploded at everyone telling them to mind their own business and that I was turning in. I felt bad but my blood was up and I was getting a headache that threatened to split my head in two. I decided that a shower would help.

 

I sat on my bunk in my quarters and looked out the window for the longest time. The stars were hypnotizing as they held my gaze and a calm washed over me. I felt bad that I had shouted at everyone. I couldn’t brush them aside as I went to sleep.

 

There they were in a ring, like the dueling circles. Blast I hated that sport. I stood in the center and opposite was a hooded figure and next to him was…not Tvark. I was confused as the hooded figure lowered his hood to reveal Eómeros but he had turned to the dark side. He gave me a menacing smile and announced that this was the moment I had been waiting for.

 

Then it was mystery man and I locked close in battle. He laughed at me as I defended myself and attempted to strike him down. He said, “Schutta, you seriously cannot hope to win. Release your anger. Only your hatred can destroy me.”

 

I gave a hard punch that connected and sent him flying. Eómeros raised his lightsaber at me and said, “The Sith creates the Blood King,” and he swung.

 

I sat up feeling the sweat pour down my chest as I breathed heavily. I was slightly disoriented and looked around. I had knocked the lamp off the stand it was on when I punched in my sleep. I got off my bunk and put my tunic shirt on and tied it securely. Kapu was still asleep when I was semi presentable to walk down the ship’s halls though I was only dressed in my sleeping pants and my tunic. I left my quarters and wandered down the halls of the ship, heading towards the mess hall, well at least to the kitchens.

 

No one was there when I arrived and I had the fortune to not meet anyone in the halls, as I didn’t want to talk to anyone. There was a limited selection of non-alcoholic so I settled for Dantooine milk. Personally I prefer kataran milk but it was the best around. I heated it and sat at one of the tables nursing it. I rested my head on my right hand and used my left to stir the heated milk rather absent minded. I spent the time not being there. It was a rather old technique of disengaging the mind from the present and seeking out a place where you and your bondmate can meet. Tergis taught it to me but I had never used it until after he died. Mostly it was a childish attempt to find him and I never did ‘hear’ him. I did manage to go to a spot that I always had felt safe, Tergis’ gardens at the old enclave on Mikkado.

 

I was just sitting there at the table lost in my secure place when none other than Jolee joined me. He must have been talking to me for five minutes before my mind actually returned to where I was for he was again muttering about ‘inattentive youth.’ Seeing that he was there I immediately apologized, “Sorry, Jolee. I didn’t hear you come in.”

 

“Huh, the way you were staring I thought you saw me. But all I could get out of you was your inattentive self,” and he sat down with his own mug of warmed milk.

 

“Nah, not inattentive Jolee. I was well…somewhere else,” I replied rather lamely.

 

“I could see that. Where?”

 

“The gardens where I grew up with. My master, Master Tergis planted it in between his Jedi duties and I helped. I could actually smell the flowers and hear the clear water and see the footpaths.”

 

“I knew Tergis. Good Jedi. Tough fighter though you probably couldn’t judge that by the way he encouraged diplomacy. I kind of knew that you knew him by the way you were trying to keep Atton and Carth from fighting.”

 

I smiled. For some reason Jolee was easy to talk with even if he was blunt in his comments. I took a sip of my milk and continued to listen to Jolee as he continued, “I especially liked that part where that assassin trash can called you a Handsome Meatbag.”

 

I snorted in my milk. Jolee noticed and chuckled with me. I made a mental note to ‘fix’ HK when I had the chance. Kidding aside, I sobered immediately and sighed. I guess I should tell someone. I sighed again and said, “I had a nightmare.”

 

“Not the first I think,” was the reply.

 

I smiled sheepishly, “No. I have been having nightmares for the last year and six months. Always the same and yet so different.” I went into detail on the variations of the same dream. Jolee just sat and listened with a slight frown on his brow. I had never really gone into detail concerning my dreams except to old Petronius so I gave consideration to Jolee. When I finished, Jolee just fingered his beard in silence. Both of our milk was forgotten as we sat there. Finally Jolee said, “So this is why you are here and yet not the entire reason. Are you afraid?”

 

I didn’t know what to say. I was afraid, for my family, my friends and my home. I admitted to what the Rashikian had said to me and was quiet after that. I noticed someone else was coming in. Before giving Jolee a chance to speak, I picked up my mug of milk and left to go back to my quarters. No way did I want to reveal that I had been ruled and was still ruled then by fear and hate. I was raised on it and yet I couldn’t use it against anyone. I brushed by none other than Carth rather abruptly and I went back to my quarters and finished my milk. I buried myself on my bunk and tried to sleep though it wasn’t easy.

 

 

The next morning I was shuffling through the hangar making adjustments to my fighter. Kapu was just dozing having become adjusted to the mundane life in space. I suspect he was bored. If there were womprats running around, it would have alleviated his boredom. Instead he just dozed and ate the bare minimum. T3 was helping me so I didn’t have to talk much in Basic except to issue an order. For the most part, I was singing softly the old tribal songs of the medicine healers. I was actually singing the song of Kirabaros when Jolee came in saying, “You have a fine voice. Better than mine at that age for I sounded, and still do, sound like an angry mynock.”

 

I didn’t respond except to acknowledge his presence and I continued singing. I was still feeling uncomfortable about last night and not ready to talk. Looking back I think Tergis never addressed this issue because he didn’t quite know how. I never held it against him because saw the same cruelties throughout the galaxy much later. Just that I was becoming so transparent to others, especially Jedi, was disturbing. I feared that if I were to face head on a Rashikian or Eómeros they would use it against me. When I finished singing I turned and asked, “Something you need Jolee?”

 

“Just seeing if you needed a friend. I understand that you are uncomfortable sharing your thoughts.”

 

“It’s not that Jolee. I think I am losing it. I used to be able to hide my feelings and myself but now I am becoming transparent, like a ghost.” Then looking at him in the eye, I said, “I am afraid. Afraid that I made a mistake in coming here. Afraid that this transparency could be used against my friends and my family. I had known since I left that this threat is directed against me and I fear it dragged Revan into it because she touched once the power of the dark side.” I turned away to look at the stars through the open door. “She is strong but she can’t do this, be involved. I should have never asked her to stay.”

 

“If you know Revan as you claim, you would know that she is stubborn, more so than you,” Jolee responded. “It seems that your past and the dark side have formed an alliance. The ‘true Sith’ may be influencing these Rashikians and those that have been corrupted and because they were once part of your people, they feel it too.”

 

Jolee’s words made sense. I had heard enough of the Sith Lords lore to know of the power they once possessed. It wasn’t impossible for them to take hold. If they took Avalon, the balance of the Force would for ages be tipped in favor of the dark side. I shuddered at the thought and I think Jolee did too. How could I do anything? I was a nobody.

 

Almost as if he heard my thoughts, Jolee said through the Force, You are somebody. You have to look past what everyone sees.

 

I closed my eyes and thought back to my initial training with Tergis. For a moment I thought I felt the breeze of the plains on my cheeks. It was talking to me. Not a word was spoken as I stood there listening to it. I then slowly opened my eyes and turned to face Jolee. I said, “You are right and I know how,” and walked away feeling more assured and calm than I had in a long time.

 

 

I found Carth and explained how I knew how to find the Rashikians and how to drive them back. He gave me a raised eyebrow but I returned the look with my own. I had never felt this bold before and to be honest, it felt good not to be afraid constantly. Carth was hesitant to let me go ahead with the plan, which called for heavy covert operations and need to know basis and the fact that I would require the use of an old friend that really irked Carth to the bone.

 

After what seemed like hours of reasoning, I finally won him over with the stipulation that red squad would be back up. I nodded agreement and said nothing. It was risky but it the only way I could see to make the Rashikians play by Republic rules. I headed for the hangar bay to my fighter. T3 was ready to go and beeping in his spot. Kapu stepped into his cargo space and settled in. After a slight roll of my eyes and settling in the cockpit, I gave the call, “Red Squad confirm liftoff and attack plan alpha.”

 

“Red squad confirm.”

 

“See you at Duxn,” and we headed off into space.