Artisa Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 This sounds like fun! One of my friends on whatsapp already predicted it would be for bugging a guy that looked like Dominic Armato! I reckon McCoy would somehow join the circus as the grumpiest clown known to man and get taken away for making kids cry. Or for hitting a pet shop and stealing all the fluffy things therein. Zoom would be caught flashing his weapons in public in an indecent manner. Actually scratch that, he'd be harassing random women for beer in a drunken state. With the insurmountable amount of filth running through Roy's mind I can only imagine what he'd be taken away for. I'm not sure about Huz... he'd probably be the one doing the arresting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyTordesLegend Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 With the insurmountable amount of filth running through Roy's mind I can only imagine what he'd be taken away for. Get your mind out of the gutter, it's not my fault you lot see wicked double entendres in everything i say Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artisa Posted May 29, 2014 Author Share Posted May 29, 2014 Of course not, you're completely innocent, the victim daresay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyTordesLegend Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 For the record, I once got arrested for defending myself. Some psychopathic moron had decided that because I'd walked away from his attempts to be an arsehole in the town one night, that he'd jump out of a taxi as I was walking home and beat seven bells out of me. He did however underestimate my ability to get him in a headlock and maintain aforementioned headlock. Much to my relief, the police drove by 10 minutes later, to which I said "I'm not going to press charges, I just want to get home"....their response...."get in the back of the van!". So supposedly if I'd had just lay their quietly and had my head kicked to a pulp I would have spent the night in hospital rather than a cell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artisa Posted May 29, 2014 Author Share Posted May 29, 2014 Whoa! Impressive!! (I mean the whole defending yourself and headlock bit) The taxi driver was clearly witness, did he not testify to your defense? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyTordesLegend Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 The taxi driver was clearly witness, did he not testify to your defense? Life Lesson number 12542 to the innocent Artisa: Taxi Drivers don't get involved The driver screeched away as soon as it become apparent he had helped to facilitate an assault. The next day when I rang the taxi rank, every single driver denied having picked up pyscho boy that night, and denied being anywhere near the road in question. Without the taxi number/reg number (which I didn't have the time to note down) I was snookered. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artisa Posted May 29, 2014 Author Share Posted May 29, 2014 Say whaaaat? What about CCTV? And the psycho guy! Did he get arrested too and admit to being the one that acted first cos that's what psychos do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyTordesLegend Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 Say whaaaat? What about CCTV? And the psycho guy! Did he get arrested too and admit to being the one that acted first cos that's what psychos do? CCTV?! This was 1996 in the North East!!!!....Maybe if I'd been attacked in a bank or a particularly posh supermarket lol! But the street? No chance, istreet CCTV just didn't exist in the poorer parts of the country. Yep he got arrested, and denied everything. And when you're a poor part time worker, on legal aid, all you can afford is a crappy solicitor who advises you it's not worth your time pursuing it. I was released the next morning, as was he, no charges were brought. The police around here are lazy wankers who can't be bothered investigating anything when they can just round up what looks like "some drunks squabbling" and hoy them in a van. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyTordesLegend Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 with your sunny positive innocent outlook on life Artisa, you'll probably be equally as bemused by the time my car was written off by an uninsured driver driving on a fake driving license, with fake insurance, and his £100 banger was crushed the next day....this was before the days when cars/insurance/driving licenses were all on a searchable database. Those were the days (sigh) lol ....imagine how bad it was for Zoom....he had to write his homework on a chalkboard! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoom Rabbit Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 Crayon on paper napkins. My teachers hated me. I've never been arrested, and never been handcuffed by a man. if I were, I'd like to think it would be for throwing the bottle that starts the people's revolution in the streets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyTordesLegend Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 and never been handcuffed by a man Did you not think 'her' rather large hands and husky voice were a slight giveaway Zoom? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoom Rabbit Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 Zoom would be caught flashing his weapons in public in an indecent manner. Actually scratch that, he'd be harassing random women for beer in a drunken state. I'm not sure about Huz... he'd probably be the one doing the arresting. Flashing my what? Can I help it if I forget which one is the waitress after I've had a few? Huz woul be arrested for football hooliganism. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoom Rabbit Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 Did you not think 'her' rather large hands and husky voice were a slight giveaway Zoom? She was female. I inspected the matter rather closely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huz Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 I am the law. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoyTordesLegend Posted May 29, 2014 Share Posted May 29, 2014 I am the law. If loving the law is wrongggg, I don't wanna be rightttt (This BBCode requires its accompanying plugin to work properly.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artisa Posted May 29, 2014 Author Share Posted May 29, 2014 It's actually worse in Bangladesh - a few months ago a friend of a friend of mine was coming back from a wedding at 2 in the morning with her husband, sister and cousin in the car while her parents were in the car ahead of them. The second the first car turned a corner they were rammed into the side by a pickup truck. The cousin thought it was an accident but then it rammed into them again, stranding the car on the pavement island thing in the middle of the road, then these guys in black masks come out and start attacking the car with sickles, hitting the windows. The cousin basically just said "Run." took the keys of the car and then bolted, with one of the masked men in pursuit. The friend and her sister managed to hide in the car until the men noticed and dragged them out. The friend managed to fend them off with the help of her husband and they both ran for it, then she realised her sister was still back there so she turned and ran back, ramming right into the guy that was chasing her. The other guys were trying to pull her sister off the road but she was putting up a good fight and the friend just threw herself on top of her, and when they weren't getting anywhere with the girls one of the guys lifted his sickle to end them when the husband ran into the scene and defended them, throwing out an arm, and getting the tendons in his forearms cut really nastily. All the while this was happening in a residential area so they gained an audience but despite their screams for help, no one was moving, not even the guards of the building who only blew their whistles. The men finally left them alone and made a run for it, and even after that no one was willing to help them get home, one b*tch even shouted at them to shutup and let them sleep. The cousin had managed to get away from his attacker by running into a construction site and hiding in one of the floors and at the end of it all, a random bypasser pretended to help them only to steal their phones from their car. In the end it was a rickshaw puller who was the only good guy in the aftermath, offering to get everyone home in two trips. Welcome to Bangladesh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artisa Posted May 29, 2014 Author Share Posted May 29, 2014 May I sheepishly point out that it took y'all 6 posts before I finished typing this? And what did she get you for, Zoom? Edit: Ok never mind, I just re-read that post and understood what you meant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoom Rabbit Posted May 30, 2014 Share Posted May 30, 2014 If I go to Bangladesh, bring a gun. Got it. You know, that could have happened in Detroit, too. Substitute crack dealer for rickshaw driver. Oh, why do I have to be the only American on this forum? No one is going to get my Detroit jokes... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artisa Posted May 30, 2014 Author Share Posted May 30, 2014 If it makes you feel any better, I have somehow acquired an American accent that makes people immediately assume I'm from there And what's a forumite? O.o Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinkie Posted May 30, 2014 Share Posted May 30, 2014 If I go to Bangladesh, bring a gun. Got it. You know, that could have happened in Detroit, too. Substitute crack dealer for rickshaw driver. Oh, why do I have to be the only American on this forum? No one is going to get my Detroit jokes... Oh your not alone. I'm actually gonna be over by Detroit tonight. Luckily not directly in that dump though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoom Rabbit Posted May 30, 2014 Share Posted May 30, 2014 Skinkie! Don't go to Detroit--I hear it's a lot like Bangladesh. And what's a forumite? O.o A forumite is a twelve inch long hissing centipede from Sumatra that sneaks into your sleeping bag at night and eats your toenails. No, just kidding. A forumite is someone who hangs out on bulletin boards all day. In other words, we are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinkie Posted May 30, 2014 Share Posted May 30, 2014 Skinkie! Don't go to Detroit--I hear it's a lot like Bangladesh. Blast! And I've heard Bangladesh is awful! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huz Posted May 30, 2014 Share Posted May 30, 2014 Don't worry, I've seen Requiem for Detroit? which is as close as you can get to a decaying city devoid of all hope without going to Dundee. Quite good, if you ever get a chance to see it. And I love Dundee really. Home of DC Thompson comics! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Artisa Posted May 30, 2014 Author Share Posted May 30, 2014 A forumite is someone who hangs out on bulletin boards all day. In other words, we are. Yay! ^_^ Don't worry, I've seen Requiem for Detroit? which is as close as you can get to a decaying city devoid of all hope without going to Dundee. Quite good, if you ever get a chance to see it. And I love Dundee really. Home of DC Thompson comics! Hey don't get me wrong, Bangladesh has its charm too, as long as you're not in the city Has some amazing forests and beaches ^_^ Again, far away from the city Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoom Rabbit Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 Detroit's charming spot is out in the middle of Lake St. Clair. One is relatively safe from stray bullets there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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