Boba Rhett Posted July 26, 2002 Author Share Posted July 26, 2002 Ok I suppose I'll write one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eets Posted July 26, 2002 Share Posted July 26, 2002 Why am I the butt of all jokes, Havoc? Thanks for the small slice of dignity, Artoo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havoc Stryphe Posted July 26, 2002 Share Posted July 26, 2002 Originally posted by Eets Why am I the butt of all jokes, Havoc? Thanks for the small slice of dignity, Artoo. Hey, in my defense, I'm not the one with a dog for an avatar! That's seriously where I got the idea! So remember kids, when picking an avatar, it's not just a picture...it's a lifestyle! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wraith 5 Posted July 26, 2002 Share Posted July 26, 2002 That and eets your name sounds like something you would call your dog *looks at avatar...* ...... Ok i give up i have no idea what that means about me..... Well clefo said he has the next one, so i guess i get the one after him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boba Rhett Posted July 26, 2002 Author Share Posted July 26, 2002 Great chapters guys. The representation of me is hilarious! Oh yeah, one more thing. You can't call a chapter and then go away. You have to get it up in a reasonable time after you call it! *pokes clefo* Hurry up or the job passes to someone else! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havoc Stryphe Posted July 26, 2002 Share Posted July 26, 2002 Originally posted by Boba Rhett Great chapters guys. The representation of me is hilarious! I figured you'd either love it, or ban me. So, needless to say, I'm very relieved you like it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jatt13 Posted July 27, 2002 Share Posted July 27, 2002 i'll take the 1 after whoever has the last 1. some1 tell me when that will be so i'm not late! *fake cough* coughlikeclefocough! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darthfergie Posted July 28, 2002 Share Posted July 28, 2002 Wowzers Artoo good chapter...BTW, did you know you have bizzare friends? Does the Bus have a full 18 hole mini-golf course on top? Just wondering? BTW, if that thing don't have a Pool forget it;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boba Rhett Posted July 28, 2002 Author Share Posted July 28, 2002 Bah! Come on guys! _________________________________________________ Chapter 4: Truckin' "Come on Dash and Eets, let's get this boat on the road. It's time for some seriously reckless driving! Dash, grab a twenty spot from the briefcase, run down to that 7-11 over there and pick me up a few 40oz. I drive better when I have a little buz. Oh! And get me one of those bumper stickers that says, " We B Truckin' " I love those things! Come on Eets, let's go get acquainted with the bus." Rhett added as he climbed into the bus. Just as Rhett was about to sit down, Eets jumped up the stairs and onto the drivers seat. "What do you think you're doing, Eets? Eets responded by pointing at the hat he was wearing that said bus driver. "I owe you one for getting us out of that mess back there but I'm the driver, here Eets. Now give me the hat." Rhett said while reaching for the hat. "Give me that hat Eets!" "Ruff Ruff!!" Interpretation: "**** you b****" Eets barked as he snapped at Rhett's hand. "Alright alright. I'll make you a deal…. You know Mrs. Anderson's poodle? Yeah, that's right, Fifi. I could maybe… arrange a meeting between you two… A private meeting, if you get my drift." "Ruff?" "Yeah sure, however you want to do it, just give me the hat!" "RUFF RUFF!" Added Eets as he jumped down and took a seat in the back of the bus. "Yeah yeah… you sick lil' ba…" Added Rhett under his breath as his put the bus driver hat on and sat in the drivers seat. "Let's see… that's the ignition, that's the gas pedal, that's the… hey, this thing has two brake pedals!" "Ruff Ruff Ruf!" Interpretation: "It's the clutch, you dumb ****." "Ok ok, no need to get testy Eets…. Oh… wait. Since your last visit to the vet, you can't! AHAHAHAHHA! Ahhh… I kill me." Rhett said as he began flipping through the instruction manual. "This looks hard. This book doesn’t even have any cool pictures in it. And in the pictures it does have, all the women have clothes on! Pfft. This is not my kind of reading material I tell ya Eets. Meh, I'll just wing it." Rhett said as he threw the manual in the back and turned the ignition. "Now where's that shifting gear stick looking thing at. Aha! Here it is. Now to put it in first gear and get going." Crag gzzzz gggkk rrrkkkkk "There we go." gggkk rrrkkkkk ggzzzk rrrggkk "Ah… purring like a kitten. Those fancy German engines… Gotta love em'." *KNOCK* *KNOCK* "Open up, Rhett! I'm back!" Yelled Dash as he pounded on the door. "Hey Dash. That was faster than I expected I…. Where's my booze!?!" Yelled a shocked Rhett as he flung open the door and saw Dash standing there. His arms full of packets of string cheese accompanied by an occasional wheel of Colby Jack. "Dude! What the hell happened to my booze?!" "I couldn't help myself! I'm a weak, weak man!" Screamed the now weeping, cheese chewing Dash. *sigh* "Just get in the van. We have a lot of people to pick up." "Here we go!" Rhett stomped on the gas - and the van flew backward ramming into a line of rental buses. A domino effect began and soon all the buses were tipped over. "Oops. Heh, guess I had it in reverse. We better get out of here before someone sees this mess." "Umm. Rhett. Someone did see it. The clerk is banging on your window, screaming." "He is? I don’t see him anywhere." "But.." "I Don't see him." Rhett added as he threw the bus into first and sped out of the lot, taking part of the fence with him. "Come back hea ya dirty sons o b****s! Look what you've done!" Screamed the clerk as he banged on the side of the bus as it sped away. "Whew! That was a close one wasn't it? Here, hand me the paper in the glove compartment, Dash. I have all our stops marked on it. Let's see… next stop is Havoc! We're off to Penisvaneya, boys!" "… you mean Pennsylvania?" "Yeah whatever. Either way, we should be only about… three inches away, according to this map." Five and a half hours later the sun has set and they are 57 miles outside of Pennsylvania. "Ughh… I can't keep my eyes open any longer. Dash, I'm going to put this thing on cruise and take a little nap in the back. Keep an eye out for cops and wake me when we get there." *yawn* "Yeah, ok Rhett…" Dash said as he closed his eyes again and snuggled back up to the pillow he had fashioned out of the leftover cheese. "Wait-a-minute.…. That's not the way it works!" Hollered Dash as he jumped up, ran to the drivers seat and slammed on the brakes. The bus, which was now grinding against railing, came to a screeching halt. Eets, who had been napping in the back seat went airborne and flew to the front of the bus, hitting the windshield. "Huh… what's going on?! What are you doing, Dash!? Is he alright?!" Yelled Rhett as he ran towards the front of the bus. Dash reached down and picked up Eets who promptly began urinating on him.] "Yeah…. Eets is just dandy, Rhett." "No Not him! ALF!" Yelled Rhett as he flung open the door and ran to the front of the bus. "AAAAAAAALLLLLLFFFF!!" Screamed Rhett as he fell to his knees and picked up a piece of Alf's nose from the pavement. "What… have…. I done." Added a sobbing Rhett as Eets and Dash jumped out of the bus and walked to the front. "Come on Rhett. Get back in the bus. We have to hurry." "How can you be so callous? I've just lost a loved one!" "..If you get back in the bus we'll buy you a shiny new Masters of the Universe glass grill when we reach Rommels house." "….. will it have Battle Cat on it too?" *sigh* "Yes Rhett, it'll have all of them on it. Now get in the bus!" "Woohoo! Why didn't you say so in the first place!" Yelled Rhett over his shoulder as he jogged back into the bus. Forty minutes later they pull up in front of Havoc's place. Before they even came to a complete stop a quiet nock was heard on the bus door. "Who's there?" "Shhhh!! Keep it down guys. You want someone to hear? Let me in!" Whispered Havoc. Rhett opened the doors and jumped out to meet Havoc, who was completely dressed in black. "Havoc! How ya been old buddy?" "Keep it down, Rhett! Do you want her to hear us? Squeaked a now more panicky Havoc. "Who? What are you talking about?" "Just get on the bus! I'll explain later!" Just as they got back in and shut the doors a porch light came on at Havoc's house. "Oh crap, she heard us! Floor it, man!" A woman in a robe ran out of the house screaming. "Havoc, what's going .." "Floor it!" screamed Havoc as he put his foot unto Rhett's, speeding up the bus. As they sped off they could hear a woman yelling in the distance… "HAVOC! Where are you going? Do you know what time it is? You have work tomorrow!" "THAT, my friends, was the Mrs. Heh… You… you guys know how it is. Heh. Right?" Havoc sputtered out. "Yeah Havoc. Dash and I know how it is." "….. You're whipped." Added Rhett as he turned his attention back to the road. Havoc tightened his face and raised his hand in protest but before any words came out of his mouth, he put his hand down, lowered his head and silently nodded. "So, how did you two love birds meet anyway, Havoc?" Asked Dash "Well, I was at the beach laying on a towel just soaking up some rays when I saw this beautiful woman playing volleyball and I.." "Was she in a bikini?" Interrupted Rhett "Well, yes. Yes she was in fact. Anyway… there I was in my Speedo staring at this beautiful woman who would later be my wife and…" "Was it a metal bikini?" Interrupted Rhett again who was now sweating and turning red. "… As a matter of fact, I think it wa…" Before Havoc could finish his sentence, Dash put his hand over his mouth. "I uhh… I think it would be best if you didn't finish that story, Havoc. At least not in front of Rhett." "Oh… ok…. So where are we headed next guys?" Asked Havoc. "We're headed to the great north. We're going to pick up Sherack and Rommel then head back to the states. I can't wait. I've never seen this great land of Canadia before." Responded Rhett as he wiped the sweat from his brow. Do you guys think we should buy some winter clothes before we get there? "Don't be stupid, Rhett. We don't need to go waste money on coats and snow-boots to go into Canada. -They'll supply us with all that stuff at the border." Added Dash "Oh good. By the way, Do either of you speak Canadish? It sure would help out." "Hey Rhett. All that cheese I ate is catching up to me. When's the next rest area?" Dash asked. "Bah. We don't need to stop for you to go to the bathroom, silly! Just use this." Rhett held up a large jar from under his seat, full of various yellow and brown liquids. "Holy hell, Rhett. That's disgusting!" Yelled an aghast Havoc. "Pfft. Suit yourself. Crybabies. The next rest stop is in 50 miles. I suppose we can stop there. Maybe I can get a big-gulp or some scotch or something…" _______________________________________________ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavyarms Posted July 28, 2002 Share Posted July 28, 2002 I'll write the next one: Chapter 5: The Return of the Viper As the bus is travelling down the freeway, Havoc exclaims, "Holy crap! We forgot Heavyarms! Turn around, quick!" The bus starts to make a turn, but rhett had turned around to listen to Havoc. Wouldn't ya know, on PA highways, they have a 3 ft concrete barrier in between the roads! Rhett turns around to see the bus plow through a 3 ft concrete barrier, and the barrier slams into a minivan, and the minivan hits a tanker truck containing gasoline. The gasoline starts to leak from the truck, as rhett guns it out of the area. The whole tanker explodes, blowing up a 20-yard section of the highway. "You could have killed 30 people back there! Don't you know to turn off and turn back on at a exit?" Yells Dash in his face. "Shut up, or no more cheese." Rhett tells him with a disgusted look on his face. "ok, I guess..." 45 minutes later, very close to Heavyarms' house. Ignore from this point on(skip to Ch. 5.1) "Hey, where the Hell are we anyway?" Eets Barks. Rhett turns around for a minute, and the bus crashes into a house. "Geez, Rhett, let me drive!" "What did I say about the cheese?" "sorry, Rhett..." Rhett leaves the bus, looking around and seeing what the heck he just hit until a piece of cold steel touches his neck. " WHy the hell did you run that bus into my house?" "You Heavyarms? It's me, Rhett.... don't you Remember?" "Yeah, I do... ok, at least I got homeowner's insurance, so, where we off to?" "Canada." Rhett relies, shaking in his boots. "ok, let me get my stuff." HA goes and gets 2 duffle bags filled with stuff, and puts them in the bus. "Ok, let's go!" 1 hour later... "are we there yet?" dash asks Rhett. "no." "are we there yet?" "no." "are we there yet?" "no." "are we there yet?" "no." "are we there yet?" "no." "SHUT UP!!!!!" Eets, the low tempered dog yells. All of a sudden on the Highway, a Sith Infiltrator fires laser blasts at the bus and puts a big crater in front of the bus. Rhett manages to stop the bus. Viper yells, "Hey, Rhett, you F***ing fool, that was a gay freak! I'm gonna F***ing kill you along with everyone else in there!" "Hope the armor holds up." Havoc mutters. "Take this grenade!" Heavyarms throws something, but it is that chiuaua eets instead, and he falls flat 30 feet in front of the bus. "oops." "Ah well, at least I brought these weaopns with us." *opens the dufflebags.* Ok, someone can take it from here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tie Guy Posted July 28, 2002 Share Posted July 28, 2002 I got the next one. Who's first though, Sherack or Rommel? I will write it right after Church (12:30 or so EST) Heavyarms, if your gonna finish your story, do it NOW. Don't wait any longer. You can't just start it and say you'll finish sometime. Either finish yours or delete it, and do it as soon as you see this. Your just holding everyone up, and the fun part of this (i think) is to see how others interpret your character, doing yourself isn't any fun IMO. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jatt13 Posted July 28, 2002 Share Posted July 28, 2002 i want to write one too, soon. some1 tell me when it's my turn. oh, and good chapter, rhett! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tie Guy Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 Originally posted by Jatt13 i want to write one too, soon. some1 tell me when it's my turn. oh, and good chapter, rhett! Not that i doubt your ability as a writer, but....you just registered a little while ago. Do you really know enough about all the others to write about them humorously? At least wait until we pick up some of the newer members. Sorry, don't misinterpret this.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boba Rhett Posted July 29, 2002 Author Share Posted July 29, 2002 I think Jatt13 can write one. We'll just have to give him some help with some of the forum member personalities. We can't just sit around waiting for you to finish the, heavyarms. Someone go ahead and write the next one and include us picking up Heavyarms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darthfergie Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 Ch.5.1: Killer Angel crashing through the suburban neighborhood at 70 mph was a challenge. And it was a challenge Rhett wasn't up to it. So don't tell him. By the time they reached HeavyArms' house there was several yards of white picket fence plasted across the bumper. "I wonder where HeavyArms is?" said Rhett. "Could it be that guy who is sitting on the Lazy Boy on top of the bus?" "What's he doing on top of the bus? Especially in a LAZY BOY?!?!?" "Remember that house about 2 blocks back that we plowed through?" "Um...no...AND YOU DON'T EITHER! We were not in this nieghborhood tonight! GET IT!" "Got it" "Good...now what were you saying about that house we didn't plow through back there?" *WHAM WHAM WHAM* "OPEN UP THIS F*ING DOOR RIGHT NOW YOU JERKS! I AM MAD! AND YOU KNOW THAT WHEN I GET MAD...I GET MAD!!!" "Hey! It's Heavyarms!" exclaimed Rhett. "I'LL GET YOUR HEADS YOU MOFOS!!!" "Hey, HeavyArms...we're on a *GAH* Hey your choaking me *GAH* Dash...HELP" breathed Rhett. "Just a sec. Trying out this new brand of Parmesian Cheese. It's really good. You should try some Rhett" Dash casually remarked Just then Eets the super duper wonder dog noticed the action at the front of the bus and ran to the front of the bus. "RUFF" Remarked Eets "Yeah...I guess it would be best to take it to the back of the bus. Because we need to hurry up and get on our way." said HeavyArms "Heeeeelp *Gasp* Eets!" HeavyArms still holding onto Rhett's throat went to the back of the bus to choak the life out of Rhett so Eets could get the bus back on the road. "Ruff arf yip!" "Yeah, I wonder if they say 'Eh Hosser' up there too." said Dash Eets shifted the 1BADMOFO in to drive and rocketed out of the suburbs and back out onto the highway heading for the artic tundra that is CANADA, amist screams of "HEY GUYS *GASP* COME ON PLEASE *GASP* NEED HELP" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavyarms Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 Hey guys, Let me finish it now! I tried to finish it yesterday, but every time i TRIED, my brother shut off the comp, and I had to restart it again. He did it 3 times. And then I was at work till late... I'll do it now... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eets Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Great chapter, ferg Sorry for butting a chapter in, guys, but I MUST write the chapter about picking up sher Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tie Guy Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 Originally posted by Eets HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Great chapter, ferg Sorry for butting a chapter in, guys, but I MUST write the chapter about picking up sher But i wanted to do Rommel and customs....let me write out that first and i'll stop before we pick up sherack, eh? BTW, Rhett, i want him to write one, just not one about the really old people. read above. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eets Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 Okay Tie, but I'm gonna PM you with ideas I had for the story ^_^ Make sure you stop before quebec! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tie Guy Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 almost finished, it will be uo as soon as i get back from tennis. Here's the customs part, to whett your appetite. Chapter 6: Part One: Border Hoppin' Eets finnally managed to get the bus back on the road, but then he suddenly slammed on the brakes so hard that it caused Heavyarms to release Rhett and sent him flying into the front of the bus. "What's the matter Eets?" Rhett asked, making his way to front of the bus. "Ruff ruff *whimper*" Eets responded "Oh my gosh, Eets! No! We can't stop like that everytime you see a frickin fire hydrant on the side of the rode." "*whimper whimper*" "That's it! I'm driving, and there won't be any "meeting" when we get back, either." Rhett hopped into the bus driver's seat and hit the gas, hard. This sent Heavyarms flying out the back window and landing on the road with a crash. "We lost Heavyarms!" cried Dash. "Too bad, we can't stop!" replied Rhett, still rubbing his neck. Dash yelled out to Heavyarms, "We're heading to San Rafeal, we'll meet you there." "Ruff, ruff?" eets barked. "Too bad, we can't stop now, they won't care if we just go on by, we already know all the Canadish customs, eh?" Rhett stated. "But Rhett, what about our free snow boots?" Dash whined. Rhett slammmed on the brakes just in time to stop right in front of the official, who gave them one of those "what the heck is wrong with this guy" looks....you know. "Uh sir, i'm gonna have to ask you a few questions, eh?" the official said. "Fire away." Rhett, Dash, and i think, Eets responded. "Are you carrying any fruit on board, eh?" the official asked. "Just Rhett, hehe." Dash remarked before Rhett could answer. "Do you have any illegal beverages, eh?" "Of course!" Rhett responded "Do you mind if i have one? Its been a long shift, eh?" Rhett didn't quite know what to say to this but he finnally responded with a "Sure" and he handed off the jug of malt liquor he was drinking. The officer took it and downed the entire thing, right in front of him. Just then another official burst out of the office. "Hey, get away from there!" the official cried as the other official ran off into the tundra. "Sorry, he's not really an official, he bought that uniform at Goodwill." "Oh...Ok." "So, i'm gonna need to see some ID, eh?" "Sure" Rhett said as he pulled out his license and handed it to the official. "Sir, this is a picture of a dog, eh?" "Right, thats my dog, eets." "Ruf, ruff." "Right...i'm gonna need to see your ID, eh?" "I lost my wallet in a car accident." "Thats what they all say. Well, i'm gonna need something to identify you, eh?" Rhett thought for a moment and then pulled a small black cassette out of his pocket. "How bout this video tape, its very recent, i just made it last nigggghhhh....nevermind." Rhett stuffed the tape back into his pocket. "Look, over there! Is that a mountie!" "I don't see it, eh?" Rhett slammed the accelerator and the bus sped off, much to the suprise of the official. "But what about my snow boots?" Dash complained. "I'll buy you a pair when we get to California, now shut up! Next stop, Rommel's place!" Rhett looked at the map and made a hard right turn, almost flipping the bus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havoc Stryphe Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 I'm all geared up to do another Chapter, but I'll wait my turn So far it's great! Great Chapter, Rhett! But you got me all wrong! I'm not whipped at all! I do whatever I want, Whenever I want... *Heard off screen* "What's that dear? No, I'm not posting on that silly board again! Of course not dear..." Um... I gotta go! Anyway, Great chapters guys! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eets Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 Great chapter, Tie Guy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
darthfergie Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 Originally posted by Eets Great chapter, Tie Guy! Great aprtial chapter you mean...he's coming back with some more later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tie Guy Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 PART TWO: OUR NORTHERN NEIGHBOR "According to this map, Rommel's house should be right....there!" Rhett said "What, behind the shack?" Dash asked, bewildered. "I think it IS the shack" said Rhett. "But that's way to small for a normal person to live in." "True, ture, but this is Rommel we're talking about." "Ruff, ruff ruff." Eets interjected "Yes, i know we're going to run into that house, it'll be fine." Rhett slammed on the brakes, leaving huge tracks of mud in the front of Rommel's yard. He opened the door and looked outside. "Rommel, are you there?" he yelled. "Yes, it is I, Rommel." Rommel replied Startled by the voice, Rhett looked around across the yard and house. Not seeing anyone, he yelled again, "Where are you?" He took a step outside the bus but suddenly tripped and fell to the street. "Geezes Rhett, you idiot. You stepped on me!" Rommel shouted in anger. "Rhett, are you ok?" It was Dash, who was now coming out of the bus to see what happened. But as soon as he took one step outside he too tripped and plummeted to the street. "Dash! Watch where your stepping, you moron!" "Ruff ruff, ruff?" Eets came running out of the bus, only to follow his friends to the street. He whimpered as all three rose to look for Rommel. When they saw him they jumped back in suprise. "Crikey! He's like a frickin' Mini Me!" Rhett couldn't hold back. "Ahhhh!!! Its a dwarf!" Dash ran around in circles screaming, "Don't let it near me! Don't let it near me!" "Arrrr, arrrr." Eets flew back up bus faster than lightning and promptly hid under one of the seats. "Guys! Enough! I know i'm short, ok!" Rommel shouted. Rhett tried to bring himself together, but all he could manage was, "So Rommel, how's the weather down there?" Rommel grew red with anger. "Fine," he yelled, "I'm not coming with you then!" "Oh no! Anything but that!" Rhett returned, trying to keep from falling to the street laughing, at which point, he thought to himslef, i'll still be taller tham him. Rommel started to turn around and walk back when Rhett finally got himself together and said, "Ok, ok. We won't make fun of you for being short if you just come with us to California." "Promise?" "I promise." "Ok, then let's go. I think i know a short cut to Sherack's house." Rommel said. Rhett started laughing, trying to hold it in. "What? Was it something i said?" Rommel asked. "Nevermind." Rhett turned to Dash, who was still runnning in circles and scremaing. "Dash, we're leaving!" Suddenly Dash just stopped. "Ok." He replied as he climbed aboard the bus. As soon as everyone was in Rhett hit the accelerator and the bus plowed through Rommel's neighbor's yard, and just about every other yard on the street before falling off a bypass and starting down the highway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silenthunter Posted July 29, 2002 Share Posted July 29, 2002 Ah man, this just keeps getting better and better I may have to write a chapter some time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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