Jump to content

Home

Van Helsing


Darth Rythe

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 67
  • Created
  • Last Reply

oh my god! what a crappy film!

I had heard it wasn't that good, but i thought i'd give it a try anyway as i often quite like bad films.

 

The plot was a jumbled mess that looked like it had been written by highschool drama students, it was even worse than LXG, and made that mess look intellectual in the way it used its references.

 

The dialogue was corny and camp as hell, and the acting was terrible. THe whole thing came off as a joke. The screechy, camp vampires reminded me a lot of the camp, low budget baddies in Buffy (the movie, not the series) and jackman (who i like as wolverine) and bechinsale (who isn't the best actress, but she is no halle berry either) came across like drama students overacting everything and having random changes of motivation every 5 minutes.

 

The action scenes weren't even very good. Repetetive, unimaginative and jumbled. Way too much swinging around, "fake -out look left, they pop op right" and accidental comedy killing. No excitement or tempo at all.

 

Add to that that most of the SFX were rubbish (especially the wolves and the tiny vampires) and you have a film that reminded me a lot of Spawn (except a few years later and with a much bigger budget). THe only remotely good ones were the brides.

 

It made very average films like LXG and underworld look good in comparison. I thought the mummy (plus returns) were a good laugh, if a bit too silly), but this film just failed completely.

 

One of the worst films of the last few years. avoid.

 

(ps, watch silver hawk or the Twins effect instead. just as silly, but much more fun).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'll only give this movie 1 out of 5 stars, and then only because Kate Beckinsale is bloody hot.

 

Why is it that those making fantasy films these days just completely throw reality out the window? Yes, suspension of disbelief is necessary for a movie with vampires, werewolves, etc. but do you really need crossbows that fire faster than a machinegun (with an organic string, no less--it certainly wasn't braided steel) or ridiculous bare-handed slides down ropes that any child can tell you will remove several layers of skin from your palm? Bah!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i just saw it today and i thought it was okay. i will agree that for the most part they tried to fit in too many one-liners, but....

Originally posted by Kale Jerre

because Kate Beckinsale is bloody hot.

 

that is true and that corset she was wearing for most of the film was fantastic :)

 

that friar had to go tho :( but they DID HAPPEN to make frankenstein a good character, which not many writers do (that pleased me)

 

other than that...yeah...his hair bothered me siv but that is one cool hat he has :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

that friar had to go tho

...though........

 

Furthermore, I thought he was delightfully silly, and he gets bonus acting points for being Faramir.

 

Originally posted by Chase Windu

***looks around***

So...am I the only one here that actually liked Van Helsing?:confused:

<_<

 

 

>_>

 

 

I loved it Chase

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by RpTheHotrod

Just for the record...the reason people like Punisher is he is a "human" just like everyone else. No X-ray vision, no mind control, no flight...but a human just like you and me...that's a "superhero" and has revenge as his drive.

 

so he is a rightwing psycho vigilante gun nut? Just like the hero in every 80s straight to video cop vs the mob film or death wish movie? Sounds thilling :rolleyes:

 

I can see why america likes him though.... sigh.

 

Revenge is a cool motivation for a short while, but after that you really need to add some depth to make the character interesting. After all, how long can you go on based on something as shallow as revenge?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by toms

After all, how long can you go on based on something as shallow as revenge?

 

After this movie he is no longer motivated by revenge. He lives to right the wrongs that others won't. He punishes evil wherever he can find it.

 

Afterall, he is....

 

 

The Punisher

 

 

 

 

I dunno why, but I felt like making my post sound all dramatic and move trailer-esque....how'd I do? ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by ET Warrior

 

how'd I do? ;)

 

marks out of 3 - i'll give you one

 

...

 

one mark i mean

 

:D

 

 

anyway, i still haven't seen Van Helsing, i'll probably wait for it to come out to rent.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.


×
×
  • Create New...