Sabretooth Posted August 12, 2004 Share Posted August 12, 2004 OK, not supposed to be great or anything, just my shot, rate me! (bad ratings accepted) Well this is based loosely on the Metallica's Unforgiven tune, but well, here it goes... The Unforgiven Pain -------------------- Never real, Never sealed, I'll break you into two, The Light of God, The Dark Rod, I'm seeking for you... My past is shrouded there, In mystery and pain, I've been wandering for years, Through land, sea and even rain. Seeking revenge for years, I find you in despair, Fearing me or my might, You try to run to your lair, But you can't hide... And the nightmares have just begun.... Never real, Never Sealed, I'll Break you into two. The Dark Age, Is upon you, For the evil I'm going to do... My suffering is reflected, On your miserable soul, I will trap you in the pain, Until you are sold... I can see the fear in your eyes, My satisfaction builds up, And all your old lies, Engulfed in paroxysm... And your freedom I take away.... Never False... Never real, Never Sealed, I'll make you suffer too, The Anguish, The Agony, It's on you if I'm given, The Rod of Pain, The Rod of Death, I'll make you Unforgiven You made me, I'll make you, Suffer Doom, And ride through hell, But you are still Unforgiven... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doomie Posted August 12, 2004 Share Posted August 12, 2004 I'd say Average/Good, but since that option isn't there, i'll vote average. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IG-64 Posted August 12, 2004 Share Posted August 12, 2004 I gave it average, because its good but not.. well, you got what I mean, and not bad at all, so, its avreage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Astrotoy7 Posted August 12, 2004 Share Posted August 12, 2004 C'mon Sabre, no one wants Metallica anymore, give us some Bollywood Magic man...... I voted Bad because I HATE METALLICA WITH A DARK & EVIL FURY !!! Nothing personal against you, our beloved general mtfbwya Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynk Former Posted August 12, 2004 Share Posted August 12, 2004 Wings spread Time shreds The past disappears The future ascends Yet you keep falling to your death XD there's my sad attempt... I can't be bothered doin a proper one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legameboy Posted August 12, 2004 Share Posted August 12, 2004 Roses are red Violets are blue What the hell Violets are purple Awesome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sabretooth Posted August 12, 2004 Author Share Posted August 12, 2004 Originally posted by Astrotoy7 C'mon Sabre, no one wants Metallica anymore, give us some Bollywood Magic man...... I voted Bad because I HATE METALLICA WITH A DARK & EVIL FURY !!! Nothing personal against you, our beloved general mtfbwya Ha. Dumb Oaf. HAHAHA. What? Never mind me... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Curt-Man Posted August 12, 2004 Share Posted August 12, 2004 ive written many poems, mainly to girls, that ive never given, i am ashamed... anywho, this is one danielle your hair is like the golden sunrise your eyes are like the saffire skies your laugh is music to my ears ive wanted you for years danielle danielle, your name rings in my mind like a bell without you i'd go through hell danielle, you are an angel form above and you are the one i love. there was more and different lines too, but i have forgotten them, and no i don't like her anymore, she totally rejected me when i gave her that, it was funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pie™ Posted August 13, 2004 Share Posted August 13, 2004 It wasn't bad, but I didn't really see what exactly it was about I've written quite a few poems too, they're in my DeviantArt Account if anyone cares You should really try to put more feeling into your poems though, and if you feel really isnpired by a emotion, you should try to get it into words I voted average btw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynk Former Posted August 13, 2004 Share Posted August 13, 2004 everyones a poet when they're in love XD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Windu Posted August 13, 2004 Share Posted August 13, 2004 Cept me, cause I don't write love poems. They're too sappy. If you want to take a peek at my poems... http://www.fictionpress.com/~JinRagnarok Enjoy the reading! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evil Dark Jedi Posted August 15, 2004 Share Posted August 15, 2004 Is say average Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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