<span class="ipsBadge ipsBadge_icon ipsBadge_positive" data-ipsTooltip title='Pinned'> The Critic&#039;s 2 cents

'Inside the Republic', with Jolan Dalt

McFinnegan

Post KOTOR: The talk show circuit will never be the same…

This is the second ‘talk show’ version, and the guests make it even more fun what with Revan blissing out on thoughts of Carth, the audience getting ribald because the two women are living together, and Malak generally sticking his oar in when he can.

Pick of the Week

It is such a quiet thing...to fall.

kattalez

Pre KOTOR: The spark that ignited a Jedi’s vengeance

The piece went very well, the arguing from the Jedi’s father to Carth who came to say goodbye to a friend well drawn into the picture.

Pick of the Week

Dreams

Knight Rogue

Pre Mandalorian Wars: As a child Revan was afraid of the dark

An interesting take on the person Revan was as a child. Having Revan a little girl terrified of the dark, and having Malak acting like an older brother is touching.

Last Dance

Tim Radley

Pre KOTOR: Yuthura Ban’s last dance

The piece is chilling in the cold calculation of Yuthura’s revenge. The fear turned to fury, and her vengeance taken on those she hates most.

Pick of the Week

Choice

Arrow

Pre TSL: A Jedi becomes a Mandlorian

The piece is interesting in giving us some background on one of the secondary characters of TSL. His rise among the Sith, then among the Jedi, now as a Mandalorian. Very well done.

Uninvited

RogueLadySabyne

KOTOR before capture by the Leviathan: Is she willing to admit her feelings?

The piece is an excellent POV story from Bastila’s perspective. Her feelings burgeoning, unwilling at first to accept them, then the shock of being captured. She knows what he wants to ask, and the question worries her more than her feelings do.

Pick of the Week

machievelli · September 17, 2010

Runs Like Clockwork!

Tysyacha

Non SW Fiction: A gnome gets ready for her tests this day

Like all of Tsyacha’s work, this flowed well. The main character is believable, and fun to read. Her explanations of the differences between our society and theirs makes you wonder what else might be different.

http://kotorfanmedia.net/node/1327

Family Ties

Mcfinnigan

Previously reviewed 07 14 06, that review is below:

Set in the interim between KOTOR I and II: What if the memories of Revan from KOTOR were really hers, just sanitized and rewritten?

The small blurb at the start hooked me and the story flowed on from there. Excellent work!

Reprise Pick of the Week

Old Women and Fools

Marin Dakari

TSL aboard Ebon Hawk: Atton remembers an old saying, and meeting Revan before Onderon.

The piece is excellent because you get a glimpse at the woman behind the legend of Revan. Atton’s brusque view of what is happening is counter-pointed by the present day as he wonders if he has saddled himself with another dangerous fem.

Pick of the Week

chiaroscuro

Turtle

Pre KOTOR: The previous relationship between Revan and Bastila

It is excellent to read of young love, especially among those denied it. The little things he does to gain her favor, the slow burgeoning of it, and the split when he leaves. At the end I was struck by the idea that I didn’t know who was speaking, Revan or Bastila.

Pick of the Week

The Way of The Jedi

Robinson133

Pre War of Exar Kun: Two Jedi decide to stop at Cyneia to rest, not knowing that they will walk into a war.

The piece flowed well, the battle well choreographed. Seeing Jolee as a young man is rare, and his actions show the same determination he shows later in life.

Pick of the Week

Unless, Of Course, He's the Pilot

JediDWH

KOTOR Aboard Ebon Hawk: What do you say to the lady when you interrupt her shower?

The piece is funny primarily because of the differing reactions of the two men. Two characters were mentioned, one man and a woman, and from the tag at the top I assume the male was Revan. That only begs one question; who is in the shower?

Pick of the Week

The Cynaderian Chronicals. Prolouge

Shifter

100,000 years before KOTOR: Intrigue aboard the Star Forge

The problem is there is no character development at all in the piece. We know names, but we do not even know what race the characters are.

Lost Memory

Mina Noriarty

Era not set: A Jedi visit’s the Kinrath caves of Dantooine.

Forgotten words ‘Not that the trip wasn't enjoyable, just that it (was) unusual for her‘. Improper word usage, reviled (Hated) instead of revealed, planed instead of planned.

The piece didn’t flow very well, the fight first with the Kinrath then with the droids seemed cobbled together without rhyme nor reason

Into The War

TheFatSwaziGuy

Pre Mandalorian Wars: Jolee Bindo is trapped.

You forgot conversation breaks. I spent more time figuring out who was speaking than I did reading it.

Message from the Heart

Saerry Snape

5 Years Post TSL: The long awaited reunion of Atton and the Exile

The piece flowed very well, the reaction at their meeting and afterwards perfect.

Pick of the Week

Mist in the Force

Kaledena

Post TSL: Even though she’s dead, the Exile has a feeling that Kreia is still there.

The piece was well written, and flowed perfectly.

Afterlife

AlyssaD

Post TSL: Revan is examined by the Jedi Council

Remember conversation breaks. You also have words run together. One sentence needs revision; ‘At the same time, the trees created a great amount of shade at the same time’ obviously needs only one ‘at the same time’.

The situation is what you would probably have expected at game’s ends. She has been redeemed, but the Council would still be worried. The idea of a total lockdown bothered me a bit.

Revise

Kuramas Girl Angel

I’m not sure which part tweaked my funny bone most; having a girl from Earth as part of the cast telling them it’s all a made up world, or her having Force powers. The story flowed extremely well, and Ari’s character is believable.

Pick of the Week

machievelli · September 24, 2010

Runs Like Clockwork: Chapters 1-2

Tysyacha

NSW Fiction, continuation of Runs Like Clockwork: The little gnome finds out about her mother’s death before she heads off to her destiny.

Like all of her work Tysyacha draws us in, makes us see the society. As she pointed out, you create your own mythology dependant on your environment. Her mother not dying, but going back to stone.

Ghosts and Echoes

kaizokunami

Post TSL: Now with a grown son, Atton visit’s the Exile’s grave as he does every year.

The piece is light and poignant, the fun Atton has still with his son overshadowed by who lies buried at his feet. The secret talk they have after the boy has left is what is shared by all people who spend such times.

Pick of the Week

Atrisia

Ivory Chopstick

TSL on Peragus: The Exile awakens

The piece is a generic retelling of the intro into the game, except that she did not speak with Kreia.

Murderous Mind

Celsie

After TSL, no specific period given: A Sith lord awakens in a Kolto tank

The inner dialogue of the heroine is rife with pain and fury. She looks at her past almost with indifference, and sees her future with as little emotion.

Droids Can't be Trusted

Mellyna

Pre TSL: A young Jaq Atton remembers why he doesn’t trust droids.

The piece flows well, the character young and impetuous. Why AL suddenly gains a conscience is never explained, but his escape with the ship seals the thought of not trusting a droid.

Remnants

Fire Team Torch

Post KOTOR: The light side survivors of the Ebon Hawk’s voyage plan their next move

The piece follows hard on a dark side ending to the game. Carth, Yuthura and Mission plan what they must do now that Revan has gone to the Dark Side.

Provocation

Yggi

KOTOR aboard Ebon Hawk: Canderous starts one argument too many…

The piece is funny in that like another work earlier in the year, when Canderous gets his come upance, everyone thinks someone else invited him along. The actions of Canderous boasting about his prowess are counter pointed by every one else just feeling tired at the tattered old clichés.

Other KOTOR characters

The Flames of War

Robinson133

Before the war of Exar Kun: Jolee contemplates his actions, and wonders about his own fate

The piece flows well, and the interplay of Jolee’s emotions are well portrayed. His worry that he will fall to the dark side because he was satisfied that another man had died is clearly defined.

Uninspired

RogueLadySabyne

Pre Mandalorian Wars: Carth relives the worst day of his life to that point, the death of his mother

The piece is a good introspection of Carth. He remembers the conflicts between him and his father, the warm relationship with his mother, and grieves in his heart as people will.

There is No Death . . .

Tim Radley

Mandalorian Wars: The Republic begins a new campaign

The piece has no flight of Jedi superiority, it has instead a meeting discussing the Mandalorian advance, and the Jedi taking a firm hand in it. It is dry, pedantic, and thoroughly delightful as all of Trs work to date.

Pick of the week

The Turning Point

Lord Valentai

Mandalorian wars: For Malak the war has become personal

The piece flows well from the aftermath of an attack to the death of those that carried it out. The characters are clearly defined and almost picture perfect.

Pick of the Week

The End of a World

Kitome

Mandalorian wars at Malachor V: The end of the war leads to an end to their fellowship as well.

The piece is excellent, the last victim of the Mandalorian wars goes home to face judgment, and seems almost relieved when she does.

Memories of A Traitor

Amoinete

Mandalorian wars: Revan reminds me of Mephistopheles in Faust

The story begins with the Jedi offering their services, and ends with Karath fully under the Dark Side. The evolution of the Jedi from protectors to Sith was well done.

machievelli · October 1, 2010

Galactic Comedy Central: The Daily Korrbolt- Episode II

Broken

Endorenna

Post Clone War: What a father will do to protect his child

The piece flows well, the new and improved Code is merely simplifying the situation.

It’s been a while, but you still do good work.

Order 66- The Edge

Jedi Man

Clone War Era: A Jedi survives the extermination order on Kashyyyk

The piece is short and a bit confusing. Most of that confusion you know is back with whatever Jedi are still alive fighting for their lives.

Jedi Master 12

Post KOTOR: The talk show serie continues

I had a lot of fun with the first part of this one and the fun continues. Jolee going at it hammer and tongs with the host, who I agree isn’t fast on the uptake is funny.

Lies

http://www.lucasforums.com/showthread.php?t=205535Runs like Clockwork: Chapter 2

Tysyacha

Continuation of Runs Like Clockwork: The gnome girls heads for school

The society is fleshing out, and my main curiosity is about the main character and her friend. She makes them sound like misfits, but doesn’t adequately explain why.

Trials and Tribulations

Revans Pet Duck

Pre Mandalorian Wars: The Jedi prepare to face the Mandalorians

The piece is the calm before the storm. The young Jedi are full of anger, and prepared to fight. They only wait for the order.

Right and Wrong

Revans Pet Duck

Pre Mandalorian Wars: Bastila remembers the beginning

The piece is a good counterpoint of the one it followed; when all you have are two bad decisions, which do you make? Her own confusion is also counter pointed because she has mixed emotions about the fighting.

The makings of a hero

Kattalez

Mandalorian wars on an embattled planet: As a young man dies, Carth is struck by melancholy, and the desperate wish to remember his name.

The piece is an excellent war story told not from the front lines, but from within the encampment. Carth’s sarcastic look at the propaganda machine fits the character well.

Pick of the week

A Rude Awakening

mcfinnegan

Originally reviewed July 27th, 2006. That review is below:

After the destruction of the Star Forge, the Republic Troops have a blast to be remembered. Both Bastila and Alana however would rather forget it.

The piece started with four disclaimers, ending with one that meant the author really expected flak.

O-Kay.

Then I read it.

After I was done laughing, I decided, what could I say? First, having two of the characters end up in bed didn’t disturb me as much as it did them. Mission’s reaction was choice and brought even more laughter. Juhani’s was icing on the cake.

My complaints are to the other reviewers. First, I have had too much to drink before, so I understand waking up in bed with someone and not being at all sure what might have happened. While one appears to have been nude, and the

other topless, that doesn’t mean anything happened. (I know, you’re all sitting out there saying ‘Ah the Critic protests too much methinks!’ but it is true. Mission’s reaction is what I would expect from a girl her age. Juhani’s was taken as a lesbian offer, but think about it? The principles don’t remember what happened, the only existing picture is of them SLEEPING. She was just doing what every person who has ever caught a friend in such a position would have done, teased them unmercifully. Ask me about the hole in the bedroom floor sometime.

Against All Odds

Kattalez

Originally posted 27 July 2006, That review is below:

As Ebon Hawk leaves at the start of KOTOR II, Carth pours out his own angst.

I have been bombarded with people asking me what I thought about a game I didn’t even own since I began this column last October.

A friend bought me a copy of The Sith Lords on the 26th, the day after my birthday, but I have yet to load it. I don‘t know if I have enough room on my hard drive.

But this one piece, with Carth watching his love go into danger without him makes up for everything I have yet to do in that new game.

I immediately recognized ’Take a look at me now’ by Phil Collins, and the music fit the situation better than it did in the movie that used it. I can feel the angst Carth is feeling. Worth not only a second look, but a third and fourth one as well.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Of Loss and Leaders

Glass_Mermaid

Originally reviewed July 27th, 2006. That review is below:

Interim just after KOTOR I: With Revan gone to save the universe, All Carth has is the memories of their epic journey and his own heart break.

Fifteen people read and commented on this. Most of them said everything I would want to say. The work is excellent only needing rereading (You accidentally used the word glass when you meant gloss) to be exquisite. The memories of a lost love, and all that lead up to that loss are expressed in poignant detail, and heartbreaking clarity.

Well done.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Dreams Are Where Truth Sleeps

See the Light

Miss Becky

TSL aboard Ebon Hawk: Bao Dur finds a different side to Visas

The piece sort of drifts along, seeing the crew at rest and play. No major events are chronicled, just a lazy evening.

Amber Penglass

TSL aboard Ebon Hawk: A nightmare spices up the scene.

There isn’t much to the story when you come down to it, just a typical wake the person from a nightmare, but the scene runs with the emotion of the characters, and the deepening relationship. Very well done.

Pick of the Week

Destiny's Knight II: The Sith Wars

Sith Lord Darth Revan

Post KOTOR: After surviving an attempt by the Republic to assassinate them, Revan and Bastila regain the Sith throne.

The piece flows well, and the interjection of events in Republic space explain a lot of the back story. Revan having a second apprentice made an interesting commentary on the events.

Life Waves

Onasimagic

Post KOTOR: Revan concentrates on her past with a certain flyboy

The piece flows well, but there are confusing gaps. Revan goes from remembering conversations with Carth to protecting the children from a rancor, leaving the reader floundering.

A Lot to Forgive

Amber Penglass

Pre TSL: Atton goes through his own nightmares.

The piece flowed well, and Atton’s remembrances are pure Atton.

Hard to Leave, Harder to Stay

Saerry Snape

Post TSL: Atton considers his future

The piece flowed well, but was too short to get a grasp.

JediMaster12 · October 1, 2010

Thanks for the review mach. Personally this one was harder since I was deciding whether or not to include things from TSL but then that would have ruined a potential second series lol.

Endorenna · October 1, 2010

Thanks very much for reviewing my piece. ^_^ I'm glad you liked it.

machievelli · October 8, 2010

My first Journey in to Kotor galaxy awaits.

Yeyyoo

KOTOR From Taris to Dantooine: A generic retelling of the story

I could tell after just a couple of paragraphs that English is the author’s second language. Because of that I will be gentle.

Remember to do a sight edit before posting; thou should be though, exited (left) should be excited, that kind of thing.

I Know

Amber Penglass

TSL On Korriban: The Exile talks to the one person in the crew who would understand her ordeal.

The piece is angst laden as the Exile relives the events in the tomb, and Atton is there to lean on afterward. There is nothing unsuspected or surprising, just two people reliving their own pains and healing each other.

The Way Things Were

Amoinete

Pre KOTOR: A Dark Revan visits herself five years earlier to direct her on her path.

The piece is interesting in that the future Revan is unwilling to allow herself to forgo the path.

Mutual Incompatibility

Helena L

Post KOTOR: The marriage ended almost thankfully

The piece was smooth and went from beginning to end without a ripple. The divorce was so sedate you almost missed it. There was a d-uh moment when they talked about the one and only time they had sex. Like she said, she was a Jedi, so why was that a surprise. What I wonder about is how they even got so far as a marriage with such a gulf of backgrounds.

The Huntress

qt3.14159

Post TSL: A Mandalorain bounty hunter captures Mira, but it is only the first step

The piece was enjoyable because the Mandalorian is not the stereotypical maniac they are usually portrayed as. That alone made it worth the read.

Pick of the Week

Chaotic

Carrat

Six years Post KOTOR: Mission has to bail Griff out of trouble again

I read the first three chapters, and it was interesting.

A Scoundrel's Company

Amber Penglass

TSL on Peragus: With both of them locked in the cell briefly, the Exile and Atton size each other up.

Hope’s End-Of Vao and Zaalbar

JmSlayer

Originally reviewed 4 August, 2006, That review, is below:

With Revan Dead, Mission become what she hates the most.

A poignant and bothersome piece. As much as I hated the story line, I have to applaud not only the guts it took to write it, but the way it was handled.

Reprise Pick of the Week

The Way of the Genoharadan

Stormtrooper5553

Post KOTOR: A secret organization is mobilized.

The piece was a bit confusing because it is part and not part of the KOTOR period. It almost sounds like the self-serving protestation of the Illuminati.

Waiting for Her

Chubbles

Originally posted 11 August 2006, that review is below:

After KOTOR 1: In an alternate reality: Carth waits for his true love to return.

The style is poignant as Carth watches his children, and hopes that Revan, his wife will return. I can’t say anything good about this that 12 reviews on the site and 19 thumbs up haven’t already said.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Trials

Jiara

Decades Pre KOTOR: The Jedi trials were a bit different…

It’s an interesting look at Vrook Dorak and Jolee back when they were still young. Dorak is just as studious as you would have thought, and Vrook just as impatient. But Jolee even as a young man was irascible, and oddly enough, brother of Dorak. His anger at the council is understood, because i could see them berating him prior to the war of Exar Kun because he fell in love, then getting smarmy because of Dorak’s find.

Luncheon at the Races

Kosiah

Pre KOTOR: Mekel needs to find some connections

The piece is well written, with a lot of interplay between the characters. Having Mekel be the one who seduced Dustil into the Sith was an interesting take, as was Mekel’s mother.

Come home soon

RogueLadySabyne

Pre KOTOR: Like Penelope, Morgana waits.

The piece is smooth and gentle, portraying a life spent on the sidelines. Morgana, like every military wife, spends her time doing what must be done, and wishing her husband will return. Very moving.

Pick of the Week

machievelli · October 10, 2010

For those interested, Wanderer: Gryphonrider II is at the Frankfurt book fair. If you're in the mood to suport me, hoist a German beer this week!

machievelli · October 15, 2010

Torchwood Five

The Doctor

NonSW Fiction: In a small Canadian town, a horror is birthed.

Like a lot of the Doctor’s work, the piece is almost chiaroscuro in it’s darkness. The characters flow across the screen going about their business with ease.

Family Resemblance

AthenaPrime

TSL aboard Ebon Hawk: Manda’lor remembers another time, and another crew.

The piece is an interesting piece of introspection; especially with the surprise that Revan was his wife.

Collectables

Feza

Pre KOTOR: Juhani was also a collector

The piece flowed well. Her irritation at her mother was perfectly portrayed, and her father unable to finish telling her about the home planet they had lost was even better.

Reunion With the Past

RogueLadySabyne

Pre KOTOR: A brief glimpse of Canderous’ past and his clan.

The piece is gentle until the end; Canderous meeting his expatriate Cousin, and

Remembering their shared and separate past.

Desert Son

Dinah Lance

Pre KOTOR: Young Canderous is upset that he is not chosen, until he finds out why

The piece is a superb glimpse of Canderous as a young man. His fury at being left aside when testing comes is perfectly in character, and his mother’s response as to why well done.

Pick of the Week

The Beginning

Darth Paya

Pre KOTOR: Kreia searches for a great evil on the Rim, and finds it in a cradle.

The piece flows well, even though the author admits that English is a second language. The fight is abrupt and really unnecessary, but well done.

First Encounter

JediMaster09

Pre KOTOR: Like any kids, young Jedi love concerts.

The piece is interesting in that we see a teen-aged Bastila as giddy as any school girl going to a concert.

Knights of the Old Republic III: Return of Revan

Flicker404

Five years after KOTOR: Two apprentices find one of the ancient star maps.

The piece flowed well, though I was surprised that you had two apprentices doing the job.

Sacrifice

Alatara

Pre KOTOR: Forces turn to face each other

The piece has a ‘before the storm’ quality. On Dantooine, Bastila prepares, probably for the mission to capture Revan, while Revan considers her subordinates in a not so flattering light.

Glimpse

Amber Penglass

Pre TSL: Jaq Attarand gets a glimpse of the possible future,

The piece is well done with the Assassin he had been looking into his future. The two kisses, one in the vision, the other in real live was perfect for such a couple.

Voni Tetr Bounty Hunter

BadWolfWho

Between KOTOR and TSL: A bounty hunter decides to challenge another

The piece has a flat generic feel to it.

The fragile balance of the heart and soul

The Lady Revan

Post KOTOR: Carth worries about Revan who had disappeared days earlier

The piece flows well from present to past to present with hardly a ripple. Very well done.

Light and Dark

The Black Unbrella

During the Jedi Civil war: Two lovers meet as enemies

The piece is short but interesting; the idea that a pair of lovers would choose their side not for good or evil, but for love.

Pick of the Week

The Doctor · October 15, 2010

Thanks Mach - both for the review, and for holding off on posting it until I'd finished posting the first story. I look forward to your thoughts on the subsequent Torchwood stories.

machievelli · October 22, 2010

Star Wars: Imperium

MR. BFA

Post TSL: A new Sith Lord reaches for the throne.

Just the intro so far, but looking good.

The last time I ever saw him

Following the footsteps

The Lady Revan

Post KOTOR: A vindictive brother in law has his sights set on Carth.

The piece is interesting in that we’re building to yet another storm as Carth searches for Revan on the Rakata home world

The Lady Revan

Mandalorian Wars: A woman meets and falls in love with the rescuer of her child.

The piece is a one shot and damn brief. A pity, it is looking good.

Pick of the Week

Reflection

BlueFairyDust

Post KOTOR: Carth reflects on what he had been and what he has become because of love.

The piece flows very well, his ‘reflection’ merely the human mind going through all of the paths not taken, and how staying on a separate path helped him survive.

Coming Back

Zealit

Post TSL: The pairs of lover reunite.

This has a good ‘we’re done and home’ feel to it. Except for failing to make conversation breaks, it was outstanding.

Pick of the Week

I Am Not Real

fuzzynerds

Post TSL: Having settled in to train the young, the Exile’s team discovers where Revan is.

The piece is placid, barely rippling over the ground. Not much happened in the two chapters I read.

Masters of the Force

Fatemperor

Two years Post KOTOR: Revan has a new ship and mission.

The piece was too short to get a good feel for it.

Revenge of the Sith - Interlude I

In the End

Okobojii

Post KOTOR: With Revan now gone Carth remembers all he knew of her.

The piece is introspective and kind of sad. Carth waits patiently for Revan to return.

Ask HK

ZK273

Originally reviewed in one of my first columns back in 28 Ocober 2005. That review is below.

A parody with HK from KOTOR fame as an advice columnist.

While I thought the ‘just kill him’ attitude HK always displays would pall, it is remarkable funny. One of four in a series.

Reprise Pick of the Week

WebMistressGina

KOTOR after the Leviathan: When you find out you were once the Sith Lord, it’s time to get drunk, right?

The piece is a gentle rendition of two men trying to get over the news they have had. No major revelations, and not a bit of projectile vomiting, not much more.

Laughter from the Sky

JediDWH

Originally posted 1 September 2006; That review is below:

After the battle of the Star Forge: The crew of Ebon Hawk have a fireside party.

The style is good, and making a song for Mandalore that harkens back to Gilbert and Sullivan worked. Every character fit in well, and even having Carth and Canderous unwilling to get into the fun fits well. Worth a look as all JediDWH’s work has been so far.

Reprise pick of the Week

You Might Die Trying, Prologue

slincoln

Post TSL: To track someone as elusive as a Jedi, you need the best bounty hunter alive. Having her do it because she wants to find the Exile is just icing on the cake.

Canderous and the Crossover Challenge

Vlork

Post KOTOR: When you have crossover problems, you call in the big guns.

The piece is definitely funny. Canderous being called, along with what looked like the entire board of directors from NBC showing up to cow the crew of the Enterprise.

Pick of the Week

machievelli · October 29, 2010

You Might Die Trying, Chapter 1

For the longest time

McFinnegan

Post KOTOR: Bastila and Helena make some amends

The piece is well wrought. The scene well laid and clear. Definitely worth the effort of reading.

Pick of the Week

Brightest Possibility

SinJinn

Pre KOTOR: Carth meets his son for the first time

A bright vision from Carth’s past as he sees his son for the first time. The piece is a perfect vignette.

The Price Paid

Robinson133

Pre KOTOR: The battle is won, but Jolee loses his wife in the bargain

The action is hot and heavy, and the only problem I had with it was having Nayama go to the dark side was a bit contrived.

Slincoln

Follow on to the Prologue: The Jedi arrange a prison break

The piece flows very well and the acrimonious pilot they picked up was choice.

A Pair of Sparkling Eyes

JediDWH

Pre KOTOR: In an interesting switch, Carth sits at home waiting while Morgana goes to war

The piece is rife with the problems a single male parent might have; accidentally breaking things, problems with the vacuuming, not being a good cook compared to the wife, that kind of thing. The ending is good, merely switching the characters out. As someone else commented, a vengeful engineer…

Goodbye

Shadow Revan

Post KOTOR: Driven by remembering what she had been, not what she has become, Carth walks out on Revan

I think all of us at one time or another have felt lost and hurt in a relationships, so we can understand Carth’s feelings here. As memories return, he feels more left out in the cold, and finally embraces it rather than returning.

A Journal by Thomas Ordainas - Book 1

The Lady Revan

Post KOTOR: An ancient journal records snippets from Revan and other people as it changes hands.

The piece is interesting in that we see each event from outside. Her brother, Malak, Bastila, even a couple of masters are recorded, all for the enjoyment of a very young girl.

Bad Dream

OnasiMagic

Post KOTOR: With Revan running mission after mission for the Jedi Council, Carth has a depressing dream.

Turnabout is obviously fair play here. While he waits at home with their daughter, it is his wife who is going out all the time, with the chance that she will not return. The argument was short but sweet; his wanting to be one of the most important people in her life, and begging her to stay.

Pick of the Week

Dear Brother

OnasiMagic

Post KOTOR: Carth’s evil twin returns to take up the relationship with Revan

The piece might be interesting later on, but evil twin stories are a dime a dozen.

Imagine

Secret Whisper 92

TSL aboard Ebon Hawk: Love flourishes.

The piece is a bit fluffy as the author said, and having Mira and Mical get together is not a bad end, even though it is a bit bizarre.

Star Wars: Unique Clones

Delta 811

Pre Clone wars: A simulation is carried out flawlessly

You forgot conversation breaks a couple of times. OH, and one minor aside, WIA (Wounded in action) are defined as casualties.

HK?

Sarah1281

KOTOR on the Rakata homeworld

The piece is fast, irreverent, and at times confusing. The idea that Juhani was added to the crew only because the Jedi Masters wanted her dead but couldn’t admit it was funny. The Russian accent was confusing.

machievelli · November 5, 2010

Bastion of Light

Masked Felix

One year post TSL: As the Jedi students practice, something evil arrives among them.

You need to remember to do a visual edit of the work, and trust your spell checker. You used awnser when it should be answer. Also remember to put in the ‘ for words like don’t.

The piece is nice and foreboding. You know help is on the way, but will they arrive in time?

Defluo: Nyx

Shike77

TSL on Citadel Station: In an alternate universe the Exile and Atton meet in more congenial circumstances.

The piece has a nice flow, the characters sliding neatly into place. If there is more, I want to see it.

Java

Shike77

TSL after Malachor V: The crew gets to see an interesting sight.

The piece is funny, how both the Disciple and Atton pick up black eyes is choice, and the acrimonious discussion was just too fun.

Pick of the Week

Mobius

DWH

Pre KOTOR: A bitter parting

Like most of DWH’s stuff, this hits pretty hard. The pair are the perfect odd couple, and you can picture them twenty years later much the same way. The leave taking was harsh in that he did not give her time to even argue. The only thing I think that would have made it better is if she had followed.

Second Chances

DWH

19 years post KOTOR: Revan and her husband Carth decide on their own to find their missing son.

The piece flows very well, the antipathy Telos has for the Jedi well explained.

Pick of the Week

Just a Name

Wraithfighter

Pre KOTOR: Revan and Malak decide they have to have new names before they challenge the Mandalorians

The piece is interesting in that they choose new names so the Republic won’t know who is helping them. The characters are the same, yet there is also foreboding.

The Blue Side of the Force: Book I- Complements, Chapter 1

Home Sweet Home

Revans Pet Duck

KOTOR on Dantooine: Mission deals with the loss of her home world

The piece is very well done, showing the misery Mission is going through, and highlighting the attempt by some in the crew to help her deal with it.

Averting obsession

RogueLadySabyne

KOTOR aboard Ebon Hawk: Revan and Carth deal with their emotions, one in hope the other in fear

The piece was excellent. Revan remembering her and Malak pushes Carth aside. Her reasoning is as one reviewer commented, once burned, twice shy. Very well done.

Pick of the Week

Failure

Qas

Pre KOTOR: The duel between Quarta and Juhani

The piece is good because we have heard about this fight, but never actually seen it. The teacher goading the student beyond relief is well done, and the fight well choreographed.

Pick of the Week

Viva Bastila

McFinnegan

Post KOTOR: When Helena dies, Bastila is cast adrift

The piece is well wrought because we knew from the story that Helena is terminally ill, but how does a Jedi, especially Bastila who has proven to have more depth of emotion than she originally showed, going to deal with it? Everyone portrayed was well done.

Pick of the Week

I am Revan

Rainwood

Originally reviewed 6 Oct 2006

Another look at the reaction to this revelation from KOTOR

I can’t think of anything really good to say about this that hasn‘t already been said. The reason is that 17 people gave it a thumbs up, and 14 commented before me, and quite honestly, I don’t want the kid to get a swelled head. This is fantastic work.

Reprise Pick of the Week

JediDWH

KOTOR on Taris: What if the captive wanted to tag along rather than merely escape?

In Davik’s stronghold, you find someone who had the key to the hanger shield, but all he wants to do is escape. Changing him into a woman and having her join the party is an interesting take on the situation.

machievelli · November 12, 2010

Star Wars: The rise

Fredi

No specific era given: A young Sith student starts earning prestige.

The author is obviously not an English speaker, as there are several words used incorrectly. As an example, in the section ‘with hit against’ it would read better by saying ‘from the impact with the wall’. and used tough (strong) instead of taught (receiving teaching), amaze instead of amazed.

The piece is generic and a bit bland. This piece led me to the following one, which had not been reviewed.

Darth Wyyrlok II the Undead warrior

Fredi

Pre TSL on Dxun: A young Sith gathers data for his master and himself.

Remember tenses. You send someone or they are sent, not sended. People are taken or took, not taked. grates are metal forms made of metal bars, not a term of capability like greatest, which is what I think you meant. Fool instead of foul.

The story is as I said of the one above, generic and bland. It is like watching a fight and travel scene.

The Chronicles of Jebord Esio & Belcameron Cook

JebusJM

Pre TOR: A pair of Gray Jedi carry out assassinations to aid the republic.

My question is why you’re using an escape pod for this mission; unlike a life raft or whaleboat which can be reused readily, whereas to return the life pod you will have to fly down and recover it.; defeating the purpose of a secret mission.

Sith Resurrection

Kael'thas Solo

30,000 years after the destruction of the Death Star: The Jedi order reacts to a new threat.

Not much to go by yet. Though the intro is interesting.

Lanai Kessler: Prologue

Lighbulb

KOTOR on Dantooine: The crew plots the missions ahead.

The author suggested something interesting here; why couldn’t they hit three planets at the same time by splitting up? It would have been difficult to arrange in the game, but it cuts down the time spent.

Love in a Time of War

Infanta Magdelena

Remember conversation breaks. Also do a visual edit of your work, you used the wrong word several times.

The piece is a generic retelling of the arrival on Taris except for having Carth meet our Revan a bit earlier.

Resurrection

McFinnegan

Originally reviewed 6 October 2006 That review is below:

As Bastila deals with her mother’s death, Alana (Revan) delivers on a promise.

The style is excellent, the subject matter up to the author’s usual high standards. Worth a read.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Time Goes On

Noneko

Originally reviewed 13 October, 2006, that review is below:

A meeting in a bar after KOTOR I.

The piece has the look of a polished art work, and the simplicity of the scene hides the fact that it is very well done. A simple meeting between two old friends tell more of the pain in the main character than a thousand words could have done.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Falooge

Arrow

Pre KOTOR: Just a bunch of Sith younglings sitting around the fire and telling ghost stories.

The piece is a nice and gentle flow unlike a lot of frenetic stories. Just a bunch of kids, even though they are Sith.

A Family Event

Charys

Originally reviewed 13 October, 2006, that review is below:

KOTOR I parody with a Halloween theme.

All right, I have lambasted people for this before. If the author had changed the name (In other words, not called it Halloween) I would have said nothing. So grumble grumble, complain, whine.

That out of the way, I roared. It was funny from start to finish. The characters have an advantage (Beyond seeming to all be stuck in the same house ala Drawn Together) of being able to ‘borrow’ every one else’s clothes to pretend. Having both Revan (Played by Mission in a blonde wig) Darth Revan (Played by Dustil) and Canderous wearing Carth’s jacket (With arguments as to whether it is rust colored or orange) the piece sort of grabs your hand like a friendly St Bernard puppy, and drags you to the end.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Kotor II The Exiles Story

Priorities

VanillaLatte

KOTOR on Tatooine: No said Revan isn’t stubborn.

The piece in the words of the author, was just a once off. A pity.

The Call of War

Carrat

Pre KOTOR: The battle of Malchor V

The piece is dark and Revan perfectly duplicitous.

Their Paths run Parallel

The Orginal Empathist

TSL on Malachor V: The Exile contemplates everything Kreia taught him.

The introspection was well done. Considered in the light suggested by the author, perhaps the right color for a Jedi should be gray.

Triss

The Lady Revan

Six years post KOTOR to 17 years: The daughter of Revan and Bastila goes in search of her missing father.

The piece is deep and dark. I got four chapters into it, and it was worth every second of it.

Pick of the Week.

Collusions

Noneko

TSL on Peragus: The events leading up to the Workers discovering that they have a Jedi in their midst

The piece has an excellent calm before the storm feel to it. The arrival of the Ebon Hawk, both T3 and HK50, and the people going about their business.

RyuDraconis

One year post TSL: The Exile tries to explain to Visas why he must follow Revan into the Unknown.

The piece like the one above has a calm before the storm feel to it. The Exile’s explanation is well thought out.

Pick of the Week.

machievelli · November 19, 2010

I have been looking for work for the last week, but I am not worried yet.

In Desperate Need of a Vacation

Goodbye

Bubblyofart

From the war of Exar Kun to pre Mandalorian Wars: A young boy rescued from Yavin IV grows to Jedi manhood.

Except for forgetting to separating word, the piece read and flowed well. The meeting with Bastila was well done.

Death of The Dying

VanGrul

Pre TSL aboard Ravager: Kreia has a final argument with Nihilus.

The piece flows well and we get a glimpse of the attitudes of each character. Nihilis almost sounds as if he is begging for death.

DWH

During TSL aboard Ebon Hawk: Yeah, they need a vacation.

Splitting the Exile into a pair of women was fun, and the story is up to what I expect from DWH. Arguments, Atton not only programming T3 to speak in iambic pentameter and listening to Corellian operettas?

Pick of the Week

Unlocking the Past

Darth Nameless

Post KOTOR: On the way home to Coruscant, the crew settles back into a normal life.

The piece was smooth and fun. Bastila stopping Revan from making an ass of himself was good.

Star Wars,The Great Hyper Space Wars

Darth OL Revan

A thousand plus years before KOTOR: A look into prehistory

Problems with spelling. It’s hustle and bustle, not hussel and bussel and merciful not mercival.

The piece was a difficult read. There are so many misspellings I wanted to open an ‘edit’ portal, the ones mentioned above are only the first.

A Battle of Cultures

Lady Revan

Pre KOTOR: The baby Revan is saved by her mother and a Mando’a woman

The piece was well wrought, though the battle was confusing in a bad way, since it was too confusing to fathom.

Broken - Chapter 1: Halfway Gone

Light Side Female Exile

Lightbulb

20Years post KOTOR: A bounty hunter captures Atton in a bid to learn more.

The piece flows well, and the characters are well formed, though I can’t see Atton abandoning his winnings.

Other KOTOR characters

Brains

JediDWH

KOTOR en route to Tatooine: Kids will be kids.

The piece was a lot of fun. Having a game of zombie tag was just too much fun.

Pick of the Week

Progenitor

Vlork

Post KOTOR: An HK droid hunts for Revan

The piece is nice and confusing as the Jedi first discovers the murder scene, then is interrogated. One reviewer commented on the placing of a single line; ‘I am death’, and I agree, the placement was picture perfect.

Black and Yellow

Plutospawn

Post KOTOR: Mission and Dustil have a slight disagreement.

The piece flow well, and the scene is a lot of fun. Dustil still angry at Revan, and he uses cunning to remove Mission from the equation.

The Terrantatek

Joysweeper

Pre KOTOR during the Great Hunt: A Sith is upset to find Jedi are killing his target.

The piece drags a bit, spending too much on painting the scene and not enough on the characters.

The Kidnapping of Shen Matale

Revan’s Pet Duck

Pre KOTOR: Shen Matale is kidnapped

The piece is well wrought, but a bit confusing.

machievelli · November 26, 2010

Coruscant

Entertainment Center

As Yet Untitled: Prologue

Tysyacha

NonSW-Semi-autobiographical: A young woman sets out to a chess championship.

The piece is well done, kid. The description of the bus station is good, as I have seen stations like it.

In Disguises No One Knows Ch. 1

Other KOTOR characters

Darth Meatbag

Endar Spire in orbit of Taris: The beginning of the story

Except for having Revan awake and busy with something else, this is a generic retelling of the introduction. The piece flows well, and her talking to herself (Just like any tech) is well done. The addition of the droid was curious, but fun.

An Unwelcome Recollection

ocelott

Originally reviewed 22 Dec 2006. That review is below:

During the interim between KOTOR and TSL: Revan deals with another part of her past.

The work is up to ocelott’s usual standards. The scene in the garden is perfect because Jolee is just himself, but that gives Revan what she needs, a willing ear and someone not too judgmental. All in all an excellent read.

Pick of the Week

The Last Good Thing, Chapter 1

Grimrabbit

Post KOTOR: An unexpected visitor.

The piece is as good as Grimrabbit gets, and that is plenty good. I agree with the one reviewer who said the Vrook vision detracted from the storyline.

Pick of the Week

What Dreams May Come, Chapter One

grimrabbit

Originally reviewed 22 Dec 2006. That review is below:

Set in the interim before KOTOR: Revan’s descent

The writing is excellent, the flow well thought out. The only problem I had with the character of Revan has already been voiced in Family Chapter one. But seeing the character progress does explain a lot.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Five Things That Never Happened to Carth Onasi

fearthainn

KOTOR on the Star Forge: Carth tries one last time

The piece flows very well and is fun to read. The situation; Carth in love with Bastila instead is well done.

Pick of the Week

Bitter Partings Chapter One

Rinter

Originally reviewed 29 Dec 2006. That review is below:

After Revan went in search of the Traya Academy, Carth receives her last message.

The style is well done, the work could use some polish, but don’t let that stop you from reading it.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Exiled

TulakHorde

Pre TSL: The Exile begins her new life.

I am a purist so one minor thing; As David Weber said in his Mutineer’s Moon, the first thing the first sailors did when they built ships was give different names to the parts of the ship so no one would think they were landsmen. I wrote an article over at Lucas forums entitled Ship nomenclature, or; It's not a door, it's a hatch blast it! at http://www.lucasforums.com/showthread.php?t=200318.

The piece flows well, a slice of life where the character is just getting used to a new life.

Pick of the Week

Not Cut Out For Love

JediLianna25

Post KOTOR: Now eight months pregnant by Carth, Revan wonders how her life could have fallen apart.

The piece has you wanting to scream at Carth, or slap some sens into him. It wasn’t until after he left that Revan had even figured out her condition, something Carth should have figured out.

Paved Paradise

DWH

About 20 years post TSL: A member of the Onasi family returns to Telos just in time to be kidnapped.

I kept following this trying to figure out who it was. The voice sounded too young to be Dustil, and we can’t be sure if he is a direct descendant of Carth or merely a blood relative.

Synthetic Soul

Optronyx

During Clone Wars: A team of clones are placed as a forlorn hope to allow normal humans to escape.

The piece is interesting in that like any professional soldier, the clones understand what the term means, if you do not, look it up. But when a group of men are told to hold to the last man, the meaning becomes clear.

KotOR: Two Days Leave

Little Dragon

KOTOR on Dantooine: Revan gets a little unscheduled training and downright fun during some time off

The piece is interesting in that using the description, and looking at Canderous in the game, it is suggested that Revan is actually larger. An interesting twist, but odd.

Pick of the Week

I can't do this anymore

Lady Revan

Post KOTOR: After admitting his love, Revan must go into the unknown

The piece bounced you like a super ball. Revan bracing Bastila when she threatened to collapse, confessing his love, then running away as she lie abed.

machievelli · December 4, 2010

Beyond the gentle promise

Revan sama

Before the characters of the games were among the Jedi: The heroes of the game meet.

Revan Sama turns out consistent work. I had to agree that it might not need to be written, but you're covering a part of history not often cpvered.

A Grim Fairy Tale

Tysyacha

NonSW: An elf princess is displaced by a new sister.

Like most of Tysyacha's stuff this one leads to a lot of interesting situations.

Pick of the Week

Humean Emotion and the Logic Fairy

DWH

No specific era: Logic versus emotion

The piece is light and interesting, discussing the differences between logical and emotional decisions.

Hero

Amme Moto

Post KOTOR: Carth and Revan are reunited

The piece flowed so well, with the whole cast of the first game watching the lovers reunited on stage.

A Change

The Lady Revan

Post KOTOR: Revan has to decide who and what she is going to be

The piece drags a bit because a lot of it is merely watching the ascent. The character is divorced from time and reality.

Therapy for a Jedi

JMSlayer

Post KOTOR: The crew ends up in therapy

Having witnessed group sessions, this was really amusing. Having HK be the only one who got into it was a riot.

When We Dance

Eaving1989

Post TSL: As Carth retires, Atton finally admits his feelings to the Exile.

The setting, a retirement party, perfectly set the scene for Carth to finally propose. This is the catalyst that makes Atton voice his feelings. The Exiles reason for dancing with everyone but him is also explained.

Peepers

Rian Sage

20 Years before KOTOR: Malak and Revan experiment with kissing

It's a stereotypical pair of nosy kids watching what other people are doing, and trying it themselves. The ending, where they are going to see something dead is just pure kid.

Bounty Hunter Tales; Calo Nord

The Lord of Nothingness

Jin Phoenix

In interim between the War of Exar Kun and the Mandalorian Wars: A master teks his apprentice to Ilum.

The piece is tightly written and well made. The explanation, he would not have taken the boy if he didn't ask, was especially choice.

Faltallon

No specific timegiven: To a hard core hunter, even turning on your own is just a day's work.

The piece is well wrought, the build up very well done, right up to the Betrayal.

Pick of the Week

The (very short) Journal of Carth Onasi

RevanandCarth

KOTOR on Taris: Who knew he kept a diary?

The piece is short but funny; Carth spent more energy on his missed Paranoids Anonymous meetings than anything else.

The Exile's 'Exiles'-Chap. 1 and 2

DarthBunny

Post TSL: A [artially combined crew from both games makes a discovery, even as T3 works to hide it

The piece flowed well, and was a good bit of fun to read.

The Jedi And The Soldier Chapter One: A Walk in the Park

JadenOnasi

Pre-Mandalorian Wars: Revan runs into Carth Onasi in more ways than one.

The piece is interesting in that characters who will meet two decades later literally run into each other. As the reader, my only question is how they will not recognize each other later?

machievelli · December 11, 2010

Knights of the Old Republic: Revelations

VyLinvail

First, it is not a room, it's a compartment.

I have to agree with Jadi. The description broke up the action in an inopportune manner.

Well done.

Knights; Chapter one

Taris

Was posted 14 July 2005, Original review below:

The events aboard Endar Spire in KOTOR I

The character has a lot of internal dialogue which is fun to read. The story could use fleshing out, and the irritated Carth lambasting her because she is moving so slowly, and threatening to throw her in the lifepod is an excellent touch. People tend to be too polite in these games, even when they are furious. Worth a second glance.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Taking The Chance

lilianjoy

Originally reviewed 18 August 2006, that review is below:

After KOTOR I: Carth take the chance that Revan loves him.

An little vignette that fits so smoothly with the story line. Well done, well portrayed, like a good beer, a crisp and clean finish.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Reflection

RevanandCarth

Originally posted 25 August 2006, that review is below:

After KOTOR I: A man looks at how his life has changed for the better.

A lot of people see Carth and Saul as Ahab and the whale. But unlike Ahab, who I believe would have been a shattered man after the fact, Carth came out of it, and we all know why if your Revan is female. Good work.

Reprise Pick of the Week

May the Farce be with you too

Jiara

Originally reviewed September 1st 2006, that review is below:

The landing on the Rakata Homeworld, but not exactly what you would expect...

I am never surprised by Jiara’s work but she did it this time. This is a farce from beginning. From the arrival of Mr. Rourke from Fantasy Island to the wreck of the SS Minnow, I was sitting there stunned, trying to figure out what she had been smoking when the ending arrived.

Jiara’s work is always worth a read. Even when it confuses you.

Reprise pick of the Week

Warrior's Heart

CarthOnasiLVR

Originally reviewed 8 August, 2006, that review is below:

Set on Kashyyyk during KOTOR: Revan has a vision, then must return with Canderous to deal with Jagi.

The story moves quickly, and while I was a bit confused by the vision, it pulled me along. I assume it links to the part of her life that leads to her leaving before the Exile returns. The style is brisk, but clear, and the characters are fleshed out by the words.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Love and Trust have Consequences

Clover64

Post TSL: With Kreia gone, the Exile now has to deal with her relationships

The piece flows well, and the Exile being unwilling to aqdmit her feelings for Atton are balanced by the unmerciful teasing she receives from Mira and Atton himself.

Orphic Verboten

Amber Penglass

Pre TSL: Atton is sent to collect the Exile, but things go awry.

A relatively good read, with all the calm before the feeling built in.

Fighting Spirit

Alexandra3

KOTOR aboard the Ebon Hawk: A little tinkering with armor leads to more

The piece is a slice of life aboard the ship, just tinkering and a brief kiss, but well done.

Pick of the Week

Staring

zanmato337

KOTOR aboard the Ebon Hawk:Is there a reason for her sly glances?

The piece is fun because you have two women dealing with the attraction one has for the other and failing miserably. Bastila has so many reasons for why she can't love Revan, yet feels it anyway.

Pick of the Week

Voices in the Wind

DWH

Pre Mandalorian Wars: Follow on to Mobius, the one left behind decides she is going to follow

The piece brings two scenes together; the man who had gone on speaking at his father's grave, and the same scene with the woman that loves him doing the same at her grandfather's grave. Both have pretty much the same plaints, and their reasons are different, but you can see them leaving together rather than separately.

Pick of the Week

KOTOR Sacrifice

Sithangel77

3 years post KOTOR: Revan says the words she never thought she would say again

The piece makes you want to weep for the lovers. Separated by three years, they still wish to cling to each other, and do one last time. Very well done.

Pick of the Week

machievelli · December 18, 2010

STAR WARS : RETURN OF THE SITH

wht cn i say? th prolog

Tysyacha

Non SW Fiction: appearing to be an homage to Flowers for Algernon, one of my favorite books

A family with some psychological problems deal with normal life. As always, Tysyacha has a lot of fun with this. As did I reading it.

Pick of the Week

christos200

A century after TSL: The Sith return with a vengeance

First, read my post http://www.lucasforums.com/showthread.php?t=200318. The 'pilot room' is called either the bridge or the cockpit, depending on the size; in this case the cockpit.

I get the feeling that English is a second language to you, primarily because you tend to leave out words at odd times. The only other alternative is you have a problem I share; writing so fast you cannot keep up with yourself. This can be fixed by editing before posting. My standard mantra is, everyone together:

reread, edit, reread again, polish until smooth.

You tend to be very tight with characterization, making your characters caricatures rather than real people. Again, an editing problem.

Star Wars KOTOR: Way of the Force

Revan's Suicide

Sithangel77

Post KOTOR: Everyone can forgive Revan, except for herself

The piece is stark and unrelieved. Revan is killing herself a step at a time in repayment for her sins, and you can feel her own pain not at the wounds, but at her own expiation.

Pick of the Week

The Black Abyss

Kikyo113

Post TSL on Dantooine: The exile has made her decision

The piece runs well, mainly introspection. The idea that the Exile and Revan had been in love makes it different.

DanteRevan

During the Jedi Civil War: Jedi and Sith collide on an outer rim world

The author is excellent in description. The scene is well laid out and the fight well choreographed.

Star Trek: Crossover

kb7rky

Set during Jedi Knight II: People of two different galaxies work together to escape captivity

Having played the game, it was interesting seeing the two worlds collide. The Federation character commenting on planets and people, while Tavion, the villain of Jedi Knights III acting human rather than Sith. No explanation is ever given about how the ships crossed over, or how they would return.

The Change of Destiny

xInuyashaxangelx

Pre KOTOR Alternate Universe: Instead of Revan, Malak is captured

First, read my post http://www.lucasforums.com/showthread.php?t=200318. Ships have decks and ports, not floors and windows.

The piece is well done. One of those I wish I had the time to read all the way through.

Pick of the Week

Narth Ocasi and the Star Fork of Evil

CortessaBlatt

Alternate universe KOTOR: Don't let this guy get bored, trust me.

The piece flows alarmingly, and the name changes were choice. Bastila becoming Bastardella and Jolee J Lo. just as example. The humor is a bit forced, but flowed well.

The Price Paid

Robinson133

40 years before the Mandalorian Wars: The new war spreads to Coruscant.

An interesting read with Jolee as a young master. The discussions about what the code says and what the masters agree to got a bit wearing, but was necessary to the story development.

Best Intentions

Dinah Lance

Post TSL: The Onasi kids, Dustil and Ana have a brief adventure on Nar Shaddaa.

The piece flows well, the interplay between the siblings what you might expect from a girl in training struggling against the strictures of that training. Mission laughing because Ana (now 14) came up with the same line she had used on Carth all those years ago.

Pick of the Week

Sacrifice

Ocelott

Originally posted January 16 2007 that Review is below:

Aboard the Endar Spire: The thoughts of Trask during the last moments of his life.

The scene is well done, and the basics of dealing with someone who has had their memories erased well documented.

What I though was interesting was the idea that Trask was actually Revan’s brother. It makes his sacrifice more important.

Reprise Pick of the Week

Just Close your Eyes

Evil Shall Giggle

KOTOR on the Rakata homeworld: The ending is not good

The piece is well done, the interplay between Bastila lying on her death bed and Revan is very well portrayed.

Pick of the Week

Solace

Amber Penglass

Originally reviewed 12 January 2007, that review is below:

KOTOR during mission on Korriban: Trapped in a cave in, Carth and Revan deal with the Leviathan revelation.

The style is good the scenes crisp and well laid out. Some spelling problems (exhilerating is spelled with an A) and you forgot one conversation break. Not enough to really complain about. 19 readers gave it a thumbs up, and it deserved them.

Reprise Pick of the Week

The Twi’lek and the Wookiee[/url]

tWiNkLet

Originally reviewed 12 January 2007, that review is below:

Zaalbar and Mission tell the story of how they met.

The story flows well, the style jumping as each character speaks, assuring not only continuity but an automatic feel for who is speaking.

The explanation of how Griff was able to leave without Mission rings more true than the claims Mission made in the game concerning Lena, though the version of Mission’s first meeting with Zaalbar does not work as well.

Reprise Pick of the Week

machievelli · December 26, 2010

Birth of Souls

JediMaster12

SW Fiction with no specific date specified: A citizen of Avalon returns because of a mystic call.

The piece like a lot of JM12s work give you a lot of anthropological data that you have to sift through. This is not a negative, I enjoy her work, especially such material. She does the same thing I do, but mine leans harder on military minutiae.

Pick of the Week

STAR WARS: A NEW THREAT

Christos200

Approximately 2 years after the previous work: The Republic hunts for the Ebon Hawk

The piece is too short and scattered for an understanding of the plot to unfold. You have to slow deown, kid. Think of making a cake. Unless you're using a premade mix, it cannot simply be thrown together. Take it slow, make sure all of the ingredients are there.

Now go out and try again.

Love in a Time of War

Infanta Magdalena

KOTOR on Taris: A basic layout of what happens on the planet before heading into the lower city.

Having our Revan be just some translator assigned to Bastila's staff is interesting. The piece flows well.

The Freezing

AnimeAngel

KOTOR on Dantooine: Bastila wishes she had been able to divert Revan's path.

The piece is very well done, primarily introspective, and she is wishing he would listen to her. Her end, that she is better off not loving him.

The Final act

Robinson133

During the war of Exar Kun: Jolee must defeat his wife and return her for justice

Jolee is perfect in this piece, trying to clean up the mess he believes is all his fault.

The New Sith Student

Wyvern

KOTOR on Korriban: A surprising addition to the faculty

The piece is good because you have a secondary character; Trask Ulgo, survive to fight on. I wish I could read on.

Kata

Irhal

No specific era given: Practice makes perfect.

The piece is only the training kata, but every move is choreographed perfectly. You can feel the rhythm of the character, and I loved it immensely.

Pick of the Week

Quiet Death

LordRevan

KOTOR aboard Endar Spire: The Jedi that fought on the deck near the bridge gets her time on stage.

The piece is well doen, the female Jedi gets her chance on stage. The idea that her life was incidental to what has happened is perfect.

Force, What Force?

Kitterpillar

KOTOR aboard Endar Spire: Our unknowing hero discusses the Force in the time honored manner

The piece was a bit of fluff, but well done. The old 'Force as duct tape' was bandied about at just the right time.

Nar Shadaa Style

Kitterpillar

TSL Aboard Ebon Hawk: Booze, strip poker, and hidden cameras

The piece is a bit like the one above, cute and well laid out. The idea that with a tie hand they both have to strip what remains is cute, especially when you find out it's in the rulebook!

Pick of the Week

Stowaway

Kitterpillar

TSL en route to Onderon: Two of our fearless crew aren't so fearless...

Well Kitterpillar struck again having both Atton and Mical frantic about something small and harmless. The end was just too choice.

Pick of the Week

The End Of a World

Kitterpillar

Pre KOTOR: Malachor V

Kitterpillar has done it again, this time in a serious vein. The author came up not only with where they had set the generator, but also why the Exile lost her connection to the Force originally.

Pick of the Week

Won't Say

Amme Moto

KOTOR on Manaan: Rogers and Hammerstein take over for a few minutes

The piece rang through with a lot of humor; the entire female contingent involved in a song about love. Mission's comment, that she was only involved because the Jedi needed a trio on one side just too funny.

Pick of the Week

KOTOR Original Ending

LongshotOR

TSL on Malachor V: The end of the game in this author's eyes

The piece is confusing because there are only scene breaks, no conversation breaks at all.

christos200 · December 26, 2010

machievelli you said my story was short but i wrote only the first part. i didnt write for some time not because i ended the story but because my computer had a problem.

machievelli · December 27, 2010

When you've posted a couple of chapters, let me know, and I will review it again

christos200 · December 28, 2010

okay

machievelli · January 1, 2011

star wars: apprentice of the force

Christos200

36 years after ROTS, Alternate universe: With the Jedi gone and the Rebellion broken, what can be done to stop the Empire?

The technical things that need work have been pointed out. Wh, at I would like to address is length.

So far I have looked at three of your works, most no more than prologues. As a reader, and a critic, I'd like you to do something for me; write a chapter minimum length five pages, and send them to me. I'll critique and beta read it, and send it back. Once we have a good enough length, I'll let you know and you can post it.

Pawn Endgame

Emalin

TSL on Malachor V: Atton decides to trim back the competition.

Emalin has always done good work and this is no exception. The flow of thought, the confrontation, all portrayed exactly as you might expect.

Good work, and long time no see.

Pick of the Week

The Jedi Pawn

Kael'thas Solo

a millennia after KOTOR: The Sith rediscover the Star Forge as a young knight goes forth to confront them

The piece is short, but well wrought. The characters live and breath and that is always a good thing.

Technical note: You don't even try to explain how the Star Forge had survived, a situation that must make a lot of readers confused.

KOTOR 2 Original Ending edited

KOTOR Destiny's New Path

Robbie the Phoenix

KOTOR Alternate Universe: What if Malak had been captured instead?

A pity I can't read more than the first chapter; the opus is 27 chapters long. Just from the comments made by the author I see it would be worth it.

LongshotOR

TSL on Malachor V: The climactic battle.

The only thing I can ding you on is several times you left out conversation breaks. Think of it this way;

A ship coming into port needs sonar to spot underwater obstructions. By leaving out conversation breaks, you shut down the sonar, and make the ship liable to damage.

KOTORII The Ebon Hawk's Aborted Songfest

R Little Dragon

TSL en route to Dantooine: An evening of downtime and teasing

The piece flows well, pretty much everyone but Visas and HK getting involved. Both Atton and Mira lambasting the music of the Echani and Mandalorians spiced it up, along with an aborted limerick finished later by the author.

Lies

Dearing

During the Clone Wars: Just another day in a clone's life

The only problem I had is technical, and is addressed below. The piece flowed well and the clone's 'been there done that' attitude the perfect foil.

A squad sized strike team has the most balanced weapons fit known, because they might run into anything. The idea that none of them had something made to take out an armored opponent is absurd considering they fight super battle droids.

Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic

Zerath

KOTOR aboard the Endar Spire: The story begins

The story is well done, and not as generic as it usually is done. Having Trask running toward his room anticipating meeting his room mate is good, though the extras he brought along bought it before they could do much.

The Trouble with Love

Clover64

Post TSL aboard Ebon Hawk: Now the hard part is over, except for the love as it were...

The piece is well done though it had grammar problems. The confrontation between the Exile and Atton, broken up by Mira, was well done.