RC-1162 Posted November 6, 2005 Author Share Posted November 6, 2005 heres chap four. it seems a bit crappy to me, give me your suggestions. -------------------------------------------------------------------------- FOUR The doors slid open and Mace Windu stepped into the room closely followed by three other Jedi. “Master Windu. I take it General Grievous has been destroyed then. I must say, you're here sooner than expected.” Palpatine said in an unsuspecting manner. “In the name of the Galactic Senate of the Republic, you are under arrest, Chancellor.” Mace replied in a commanding tone. One by one, all four of them ignited their lightsabers “Are you threatening me, Master Jedi?” Palpatine asked calmly. “The Senate will decide your fate.” Mace replied. “I am the Senate!” said Palpatine angrily. “Not yet!” Mace replied. Palpatine stood. “Its treason, then.” he said and a lightsaber appeared out of his cloak sleeve. Igniting it, he began to fight. A few seconds into the fight, Palpatine cut down the three Jedi with Mace. Turning back, he continued fighting with Mace. Fiercely they fought, making their way to Palpatine’s main office area. As they continued fighting, a speeder set down upon the landing pad. Anakin jumped out and ran down the corridor leading to Palpatine’s office. Mace launched a lightsaber sweep aiming for Sidious’ neck but the Sith Lord ducked and Mace’s blow hit the window instead, shattering it. Sidious brought his lightsaber up and slashed at Mace. Mace hastily blocked the blow, backing onto the ledge, twenty stories up. Fighting furiously while keeping himself from falling over, Mace saw the doors slide open and Anakin step into the room. Curiosity getting the better of him, Palpatine made as if to turn but stooped himself. Too late. Gaining advantage, Mace knocked the lightsaber out of Sidious’ hand. “You are under arrest, My Lord.” Mace said. Palpatine’s response was directed to Anakin. “Anakin! I told you it would come to this. I was right. The Jedi are taking over.” he shouted in desperation. “You old fool. The oppression of the Sith will never return. Your plot to regain control of the Republic is over . . . you have lost . . .” Mace said to him confidently. “No! No! You will die!” Raising his hands, Palpatine shot out lightning at Mace but the latter raised his lightsaber and blocked the bolts. The force of the deflection pushed Sidious onto the window sill. “He is a traitor, Anakin.” Sidious said as he continually fed lightning bolts to Mace’s saber. “He's the traitor. Stop him!” Mace yelled. “Come to your senses, boy. The Jedi are in revolt. They will betray you, just as they betrayed me.” “You are not one of them, Anakin. Don't let him kill me.” Sidious persisted. “I am your pathway to power. I have the power to save the one you love. You must choose. You must stop him.” “Don't listen to him, Anakin.” Mace managed to let out. Strangely, Sidious’ own lightning seemed to be causing him as much trouble as it was to Mace. Mace reached out to the Force and pushed, and Sidious was on the ledge. As Mace came closer, the bolts Sidious directed at Mace began to arch back from the lightsaber and affecting him. Sidious’ features began to distort. His eyes became yellow as he struggled to kill Mace. Suddenly, he stopped, pale and weak, he dropped to the ground. “I can't ... I give up. Help me. I am weak ... I am too weak. Don't kill me. I give up. I'm dying. I can't hold on any longer.” he whimpered. “I am going to end this once and for all.” Mace replied, lightsaber held high. “You can't kill him, Master. He must stand trial.” Anakin said worriedly. “He has too much control of the Senate and the Courts. He is too dangerous to be kept alive.” Mace replied. “I'm too weak. Don't kill me. Please.” Sidious pleaded once more. “It is not the Jedi way . . .” Anakin said. Mace ignored him and prepared to kill Sidious. “He must live . . .” “Please don't, please don't …” “I need him . . .” “Please don't . . .” “NO!!!” Anakin yelled. Mace brought down his lightsaber. Quick as a beam of light, Anakin ignited his lightsaber and lopped off Mace saber arm. Mace stared at Anakin in horror. Sidious, all pleading and fear lost, sprang up and launched another barrage of lightning at Mace. "Power!" Sidious screamed. "Unlimited power!" Unable to block it in time, Mace was carried along with the lightning and flew out of the window. Mace Windu, Jedi Master awoke with a start. Six months ago the dream had happened. Now he was re-living it during sleep. He had never wanted to train Anakin in the first place. The boy was too old, and everyone in the Council had agreed with that. It was Obi Wan’s threat of not following the Council that led Yoda to grant Anakin a place in the Jedi Order. Mace sighed. Now the only Jedi left were him and Tara. On cue, Tara entered the room. Mace was training her as a last ditch effort to save the Galaxy. He would have had more luck if he had known that Obi Wan and Yoda were alive too, but Obi Wan’s message could not be relayed to Manaan and Mace was on the planet by the time. Now they lived in a spacious apartment complex. “What happened?” Mace asked, referring to Tara’s wet, torn and scorched robes. And hand. “The darn combat droids ambushed me.” She replied in an annoyed tone. “Well, you have to be alert.” “Sure, the only thing is that they took to hand-to-hand combat and one of those junkpiles knocked me off my feet into the Manaan seas.” Mace had no reply for this. “And my lightsabers got fried.” Tara continued. “They’ll recharge.” “No, I mean literally.” Tara took out the lightsaber handles and dropped them on the table. It looked as if they exploded from the inside. All the wiring was fried, short circuits most probably, the focusing crystals had shattered and half of the hilt casings were missing. “A Selkath Electric eel nudged them.” Mace flinched at the thought of what one could do to a human. “Oh well,” he replied. “Let’s go to Ilum. While I was still on the Council six months ago, Luminara reported that Ilum was growing power crystals too.” “What about the other things?” Tara asked. “Tatooine.” Tara nodded and followed her Master out of the apartment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 6, 2005 Author Share Posted November 6, 2005 by Luminara, i mean Luminara Unduli, the alien lady from the cartoons. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted November 6, 2005 Share Posted November 6, 2005 Great story, can't wait for next chapter . you get +10 cool points 'cuz I feel like it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediKnight707 Posted November 7, 2005 Share Posted November 7, 2005 You get +20 cool points for getting all the lines in the movie part right Great story man Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 10, 2005 Author Share Posted November 10, 2005 cool! thanks. andf i wrote all that from sources other tan the mov. ive never seen it yet. sorry i couldnt post earlier but my computer's servo had a short and conked out. ill get chap 5 up asap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 11, 2005 Author Share Posted November 11, 2005 FIVE Tara’s Dexconn landed in front of the Crystal Cave on Ilum. She and Mace exited the craft throwing on warm jackets. “Look for any crystal that does not radiate any color. Those are the saber power crystals.” Mace instructed once they had reached, what the Jedi called, ‘the Main Hall’. Tara nodded and went deeper into the cave. Mace looked around at the various green and blue crystals sticking out in formations around him. As he swept his field of vision across the ceiling, something caught his eye and he stared at it, trying to analyze what it was. A few minutes later, Tara returned with her hands full with crystals and saw Mace. “What are you doing?” she asked. “Have you been here before?” Mace asked, not taking his eyes off the ceiling. “Yes, I have.” “Do you remember your first visit?” “I remember it so well, I can tell you which of these formations are new or old.” “Then you can tell me whether that was there before.” Mace said, pointing at a metallic object set in the rock just before the entrance to the cave. Tara squinted and tried to figure it out. “As far as I recall, it wasn’t there.” “That’s what I thought.” Mace replied. “So now the question is: who put it there?” A mechanical scraping noise came from behind, along with a voice. “I did.” Mace and Tara turned. In front of them stood one of Grievous’ MagnaGuards. Except for the fact that it had a jetpack attached to its back. “Weren’t all of you scrapped when your Master died?” Mace asked coolly. “I am not a MagnaGuard, Windu.” The droid replied. “I am none other than Grievous himself.” Mace smiled and said, “Really, don’t expect us to be fooled, droid. Master Kenobi blasted you with your own weapon.” “While I give Kenobi credit for catching me off guard,” Grievous replied. “He did not succeed in destroying my brain, which was protected by a blaster-resistant alloy. They didn’t make me General for nothing, you know. When the Separatists found my body, they immediately transferred my brain into this specially created MagnaGuard. I have been living here ever since.” By now, Tara was looking alarmed. It was only natural, since she had no lightsaber, but Mace was a little jittery himself. “And I am looking to expand my collection of Lightsabers. Yours would be a great trophy,” Grievous continued. Grievous’ chest plate opened up and two lightsaber hilts came out, held by pincer like appendages. He took them and ignited them one by one. Mace, quick as a dagger, unclipped his lightsaber from his belt and thumbed the power tab and a bar of purple flame appeared in his hands. “This lightsaber will never be in your grasp.” Mace said and settled into a battle stance. Grievous hadn’t forgotten his moves. Lightsabers flaring, he charged at Mace. The Jedi Master bought his lightsaber up and about, and he was locked in a battle which he would classify as the fiercest of all the fights he had been in, which was saying something. As her Master struggled with Grievous, Tara ran to the ship the get her blaster and emergency medpack. However, as she neared the entrance, the metal thing Mace and she had seen earlier came crashing down, forming a door before her. Tara skidded to a halt and turned, her mind working like a bee. She remembered a bomb trick that she had discovered as a child accidentally. Placing the crystals in her hands on the ground, she ran to the nearest crystal formation and pulled out a green and a blue one. All color crystals had different densities and molecules, making it vary in power, this was exactly why more Jedi preferred the blue crystal to the green one since the blue crystal had a slightly higher density than the green. This property was the very one that was needed to make Tara’s trick work. She took out a thermal detonator and a piece of strong nylon-fabric cord and, sandwiching the detonator between the color crystals, tied them up tightly. She set the timer to 5 seconds and threw it into the fray. Next, she did the very same thing Mace had done to help her on Dantooine. Becoming one with the Force, she yanked Mace off the ground where he was standing and brought him next to her. 2 seconds to detonation, Tara released Mace and formed a protection barrier with the Force. The detonator exploded, in a very unique fashion. Instead of spewing superheated plasma everywhere, the intense heat caused the crystals to melt and caused its molecules to fuse in a chemical reaction, then cool down very quickly in the freezing cold of Ilum. All this happened in under a second. The rapid heating, reactions and cooling caused the crystals to emit highly dangerous Gamma rays, tearing Grievous apart. Tara released her hold on the Force. “That was one of the freakiest and dangerous things I’ve ever seen.” Mace commented. “Let’s get out of here.” Tara nodded to the door and said, “Need to lift that, we do.” “This is no time to impersonate the Grand Master of the Jedi Order.” Mace snapped. Tara grinned and, together, they heaved and pushed up the door with the Force. Tara remembered their next destination and groaned, from one extreme to another, but then, that’s what being a Jedi is all about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Alec Posted November 11, 2005 Share Posted November 11, 2005 Nice. 20+ points. -10 for killing of my favorite character. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vladimir-Vlada Posted November 11, 2005 Share Posted November 11, 2005 Excellent, keep it up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediKnight707 Posted November 11, 2005 Share Posted November 11, 2005 Good work Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 11, 2005 Author Share Posted November 11, 2005 Nice. 20+ points. -10 for killing of my favorite character. hey, obi wan already 'killed' him. and i couldnt keep him alive forever. that easy death shows how puny he is compared to the FORCE! *thunder rumbles* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 16, 2005 Author Share Posted November 16, 2005 SIX Tara coughed as she inhaled the dust in Tatooine’s arid atmosphere. It was dawn but she was already sweating. “Why did we come here, Master?” she asked. “We could have got the same parts from the colonies on Ilum.” “I want to spend as little as possible. I cannot allow the Sith to rule the galaxy, I may need the money sooner or later. Besides, Tatooine manufactured parts are more tolerant to extreme conditions.” Tara nodded and continued walking. They had come to the outskirts of Mos Eisley to buy parts for Tara’s lightsabers. so far, they had gotten everything except the reflector cup. Apparently, the dealers in Mos Eisley had stopped importing reflector cups because of less business. The last dealer Mace had gone to said that the only place to get the cups was Mos Espa. They were going to rent a pair of swoop bikes and hike to Espa Heights; hopefully, they would get all the parts they needed. Two hours later, Tara was standing in front of a junk shop, shaking the sand out of her hair. For this matter, she envied Mace, who had no hair to get tangled up. “This seems to be the most popular shop here.” Mace observed. The shop, incidentally, belonged to Watto the Toydarian. The two Jedi stepped in. <Hello there,> Watto said in Huttese. <Welcome to Watto’s junk shop. How can I help you?> “We need a reflector cup and some multi-purpose wires, 3 millimeters in diameter.” Mace replied as he looked around. This being had almost everything a junk dealer could dream of, surely the would get their parts here. <Ah, of course, I have plenty of those.> Watto said. He rummaged through some boxes but seemed to have trouble. <Boy! Where are those small parts?> he shouted. Mace was surprised as he could see only himself and Tara in front of the Toydarian. “Who are you speaking to?” he asked, bewildered. “Huh?” Watto replied in Basic. “Oh, I keep forgetting. Little Ani has left for good, I had better leave him and get a new slave, eh?” The phrase jumped about in Mace’s mind for a bit, and then it clicked. “What was the boy’s name again?” he asked cautiously. “Anakin, a genius with this junk stuff if I ever saw one.” Watto replied. “But a Jedi came and cheated me out of his possession, I think.” Mace thought hard, his mind working furiously. Anakin Skywalker, Darth Vader, was a slave? Impossible! Tara seemed to be in deep thought too. Watto’s exclamation broke their chain of concentration. “Ah! Here it is, I think.” he said triumphantly and took out a coil of wire and a reflector cup. “That is 50, I think.” Mace paid him and they left the shop, astounded by what they had learnt. As they sped along in the searing heat of the Dune Seas, Mace was wondering how best to use this information when it hit him like a punch to the Solar Plexus. There was someone very strong in the Force nearby. He motioned to Tara to follow him and turned blindly, following the call of the Force alone. 30 minutes later, they came upon a rock formation with a dome that looked uncannily man-made. Without thinking twice, Mace got off his swoop, unclipped his lightsaber just to be sure and went to the dome. It wasn’t much to look at, no security systems, no password encrypted locks, but Mace took no chances. He ignited his saber and knocked on the door. There was a muffled shuffling sound and the door flew open. And in the doorway, stood Jedi Master Obi Wan Kenobi. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vladimir-Vlada Posted November 16, 2005 Share Posted November 16, 2005 Excellent work. Too bad, I was planing on making something with Obi-Wan Kenobi... But what the heck. Keep it up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Skywalker Posted November 16, 2005 Share Posted November 16, 2005 its good but i just think watto would have forgotten about lil Ani then:) but keep up the good work! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediKnight707 Posted November 17, 2005 Share Posted November 17, 2005 Good job, I like it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted November 17, 2005 Share Posted November 17, 2005 Great work RC! Can't wait to see what you do with Obi-Wan, hes damn cool. +10 cool points. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 17, 2005 Author Share Posted November 17, 2005 gosh, thanks, the next chapter will be up soon, and a minor spoiler: im not telling you what im gonna do hahahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 18, 2005 Author Share Posted November 18, 2005 SEVEN “Obi Wan!” Mace exclaimed. “What are you doing here?” “I was going to ask you the same thing; I heard you had died on Coruscant.” Obi Wan replied, astonished at seeing his former Master again. “I managed,” Mace said unceremoniously. “And you didn’t do such a great job on Grievous either.” Obi Wan raised his eyebrows. “His brain was protected from the shots you pumped into him, the Separatists transplanted it into an SBD frame, Tara and I had to take care of him.” Obi Wan nodded. “So who’s Tara?” he asked. The Jedi Knight stepped up and bowed. “I am, Master Kenobi. It is an honor to finally meet you.” Obi Wan returned the bow and turned back to Mace. “What brings you here, Master?” he asked. “Need for help, Obi Wan. We can’t allow the Sith to rule the Galaxy once more. They will destroy everything in their path.” “I agree, but the Skywalker children are only six months old. And three Jedi Masters and one Knight will be no match for the Emperor’s security forces.” “Tara is no ordinary Jedi, Obi Wan, she’s only eighteen but she can handle herself in sticky situations. She is one of the few to receive the title of Knight at such a young age.” Obi Wan nodded and gestured into his house. “Why don’t we continue our discussions inside?” he said. Mace and Tara walked in. Tara headed for Obi Wan’s well equipped workbench and she began constructing her lightsaber while the Jedi Masters discussed the correct propaganda to follow. Half an hour later, all was planned out. The most reckless thing the Jedi have ever done was about to begin. But first, they needed to pick someone up from Dagobah. On the swampy world that Yoda picked to be his home, he listened attentively to Mace and Obi Wan’s plans. After making a few corrections, he agreed and the four Jedi got into Obi Wan’s Chyyra and took off. Their first stop: Darth Vader’s palace. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 18, 2005 Author Share Posted November 18, 2005 EIGHT Three stormtroopers walked down the corridor inside the Executor, Darth Vader’s portable palace. They were followed by an R2 unit that seemed to have a mind of its self, which was not saying anything, since Jedi Master Yoda was inside the R2 D2 shell. “I don’t feel comfortable about this,” said a worried Tara. “What if they discover those troopers we left behind?” “These people are just doing this job for the pay.” Obi Wan replied. “If they do discover them, they will probably launch them out of an airlock.” They carried on, heading for the Bridge. Obi Wan, Mace, Yoda and Tara had infiltrated the Executor without any interference. Their plan was simple: get to the bridge, wipe out the crew and find out a means to lure Vader there. At four-on-one, he would never survive, but Tara had her doubts. “The bridge must be down there,” Mace said, pointing down a hallway. “Gee, you think?” said Tara, referring to the sign that said “BRIDGE” Mace just shook his head and walked on; they reached the bridge and stopped. Obi Wan turned and reached out to the Force, Mace followed suit, but facing the other side. Together, they used the Force to cause the roof to cave in on the Hallway, blocking it. This done, Yoda used the Force to pop open the top of the R2 shell. “A lightsaber, I have not.” he said. “Use the Force, I will.” Tara looked down at the twin lightsabers hanging from her belt and she unclipped one. “Here, Master,” she said, offering Yoda her lightsaber. “Use mine.” Yoda could fell the inner pain in Tara at giving up her handcrafted beauty and shook his head. “Need it, I do not,” he said. “I insist, Master, there will be a whole load of troops on the other side, you will need a weapon” Yoda took it reluctantly and ignited it, the blade throwing a pale green glow on his already green face. “Many thanks, Young One.” he said. The others ignited their lightsabers and Obi Wan slapped the control panel. The door opened with a hiss, revealing Vader, lightsaber ignited and at hand, alone. “Master Windu, you survived.” was all he said. The Jedi leapt into action. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vladimir-Vlada Posted November 18, 2005 Share Posted November 18, 2005 I can't wait to find out what is going to happen. Keep it up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted November 19, 2005 Share Posted November 19, 2005 Vader vs four jedi. I don't care how chosen he is I don't think he can live. He doesn't get another mechanical limb does he? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malak84 Posted November 19, 2005 Share Posted November 19, 2005 Mace is one of my fave characters in the saga an all but for god sake he's dead, your stories good an all but i don't know why people still cling to the idea that he may have survived. It does not fit into later events unless he was totally incapictated an could not walk or whatever other wise im sure he would have done something about the empire situation.I don't buy it, i rekon he's dead for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hallucination Posted November 19, 2005 Share Posted November 19, 2005 ^^You're a fun person aren't you? [/sarcasm] This is a place where writers come to practice, and post their ideas. And to get constructive criticism. Not to hear how 'bad' their ideas are. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JediKnight707 Posted November 19, 2005 Share Posted November 19, 2005 Mace is one of my fave characters in the saga an all but for god sake he's dead, your stories good an all but i don't know why people still cling to the idea that he may have survived. It does not fit into later events unless he was totally incapictated an could not walk or whatever other wise im sure he would have done something about the empire situation.I don't buy it, i rekon he's dead for sure. Jesus, don't you think your just a little cruel? I mean, everybody has their own opinion, but your just being cruel. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malak84 Posted November 19, 2005 Share Posted November 19, 2005 Hey maybe that was a little unfair... but im just stating my opinion on what happened, i mean your story an the way it's been written is all good it's just that the idea of him surviving just kinda drains everything away from that tense scene in revenge of the sith. Im not to into EU stuff but i enjoyed shatter point an the mace windu character, i rekon you could do a better job going back to pre episode 1 an do some fan fiction on his times before his untimeley death, i understand that it was bad to see him killed but that was one of if not the most emotional parts of the movie for me an that scene would mean nothing if mace did survive.But anyways im sorry if i offended anyone just giving my 2cents on things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RC-1162 Posted November 19, 2005 Author Share Posted November 19, 2005 you didnt offend anyone, though if you still cling to your idea after i explaing, then you will. i am aware that if mace continues doing reckless stuff like this, it will affect the ANH storyline, thats is precisely why i set chapter four onwards 6 months after RotS. ANH takes place around 18 years after RotS to thats plenty of time. i hope you 'get' my drift, i just explained a major part of my story here. cheers to whoever can figure it out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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