Guest Zoom Rabbit Posted July 25, 2001 Share Posted July 25, 2001 When I'm lost in the woods, I simply befriend the chipmunk people, who lead me to the pixie kingdom where I wine and feast with the pixie king until I emerge days later...fattened, drunk and still lost. You know what? Next time I go in the woods, I'm bringing a revolver for the pixie king! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted July 25, 2001 Share Posted July 25, 2001 *Dies laughing again* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flying Beastie Posted July 26, 2001 Share Posted July 26, 2001 If I ever ended up in the woods I'd . . . not be stupid enough to end up stranded in the woods, actually. Seriously though, I'd probably do okay; one of my patron spirits doubles as a wood-sprite, and the others would be helpful (Spirit of Wisdom/Knowledge, Protector, Trickster/Guide). BTW, Zoomie, which "Pixie" king? There are several. (They consider "Pixie" to be derogatory, incidentally.) ------------------ It's like I always say: When the going gets tough, the tough . . . switch to artillery. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Sceltor Posted July 26, 2001 Share Posted July 26, 2001 I would use my old Boy Scout skillz to survive long enough to emerge as a crazy, homicidal psycho. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JR2000Z Posted July 27, 2001 Share Posted July 27, 2001 My Boy Scout skills never helped me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Sceltor Posted July 27, 2001 Share Posted July 27, 2001 Me neither, but it was something to say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taarkin Posted July 27, 2001 Share Posted July 27, 2001 Yeah but now you know how to tie knotts! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admiral Odin Posted July 27, 2001 Share Posted July 27, 2001 Also you can build all the bird houses you want. ------------------ "Dulce bellum inexpertis." (Sweet is war to those who have never experinced it.) Roman Proverb Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Zoom Rabbit Posted July 27, 2001 Share Posted July 27, 2001 Which pixie king? Why, the rat-nosed little bugger in the fur coat who never trims his nails and peers at you with black little eyes... Oh, wait! *Hic!* That's just a possum. Nevermind. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admiral Odin Posted July 28, 2001 Share Posted July 28, 2001 go out into the woods during winter, find a hibernating bear and cuddle with it. (see what happens) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nute Gunray Posted July 28, 2001 Share Posted July 28, 2001 Originally posted by Admiral: go out into the woods during winter, find a hibernating bear and cuddle with it. (see what happens) EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW EWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEWEW Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Zoom Rabbit Posted July 28, 2001 Share Posted July 28, 2001 I can bearly stand the thought...! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted July 28, 2001 Share Posted July 28, 2001 *pukes* That was baaaaaaad... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K_Kinnison Posted July 28, 2001 Share Posted July 28, 2001 just grin and bear it. if you are under some pressure use a bearometer dont you think it is a furgone conclusion? i dont know why ursoniod <font color="green">never try to out pun the offical forum punister Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nitro Posted August 3, 2001 Author Share Posted August 3, 2001 Well, I'm back... And I can't believe I survived... But I'm a changed man... Part of the training is being given one canteen of water, a small knife, a stick of beef jerky, and a set of army issue combats, someone says, "Here's some stuff. Go live for 4 days.", and then you're taken, alone, into the woods, to build all your stuff... The solo. The temperature went down to like 5 degrees Celcius at night, and was in the high 30's during the day (40 to 105 in Fahrenheit) You go a little nuts in there alone, too... I had to snare rabbits and squirrels for food, and make fire like Tom Hanks in Cast Away (Although the method we learned was slightly more efficient then his, but only slightly)... And you talk to yourself... A lot. I had conversations between the different accents I can do. My scottish accent would talk to my russian accent like they were people... I don't know where half the conversations came from... Like the one comment that I'll never forget... It was my 'typical american' accent talking to my russian one... They were talking about women, and the yank says, "So I says to Maybell, 'Maybell,' I says, 'That's not an ostrich... That's my leg.'" What scared me is that the russian laughed. So I made myself a 'Wilson'... She was a log that I carved a face into, made hair with curling slits, and named Terra, after one of my best friends back home, and talked to it like it was Terra. All in all, very hard, but I can tell the losers on Survivor to kiss my ass. ------------------ We've been going about this all wrong. This Mr. Stay Puft is okay. He's a sailor, he's in New York. We get this guy laid, we won't have any trouble. -Dr. Peter Venkman, Ghostbusters Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cmdr. Cracken Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 Nitrious is a schizophrenic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K_Kinnison Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 you notice how some people deal with stressful enviroments? Some are too stupid or retarded to care Others give up Then there are those who go temporarily insane btw.. how was the beef jerky? or did terra steal it from you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Commander 598 Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 I don't talk to wood. I just sit there quietly. Waiting for some animal to come near(White Tailed Deer,Rattlesnake) I bring my SKS and have Deer Steaks. I always remember to bring a knife to. ------------------ Official Forum Nuclear Terrorist & God of Insanity Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nute Gunray Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 Hunting deer with an SKS is like...overkill man. LET ME USE THIS BROWNING .50 TO SHOTS THE SQUIRREL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rogue 9 Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 I Probably go to Air force Boot camp next Summer...then send us trough a 2 week survival course and then dump us in the woods for 3 days if I remember right...I wonder if they'll let me take a book. [This message has been edited by Rogue 9 (edited August 03, 2001).] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Zoom Rabbit Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 *(Laughs at Rogue 9 for not getting the concept of boot camp.)* I hunt deer with my sword. Now that's a test of...something. Nitro: were you tempted to set your wooden friend on fire? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nitro Posted August 3, 2001 Author Share Posted August 3, 2001 Ironically, Zoomie, she started out as a feather-stick... It's a stick or log that you take your knife too to make little curls of wood (I'll post a scan later) that catch on fire a lot easier... The curls just really looked like hair to me at the time, so I carved a face into it, and named it Terra... ------------------ We've been going about this all wrong. This Mr. Stay Puft is okay. He's a sailor, he's in New York. We get this guy laid, we won't have any trouble. -Dr. Peter Venkman, Ghostbusters Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taarkin Posted August 3, 2001 Share Posted August 3, 2001 You DO realize that by talking to the tree stump you could have given your position away to an enemy patrol! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admiral Odin Posted August 4, 2001 Share Posted August 4, 2001 Nitro is now legally insane. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rogue 9 Posted August 4, 2001 Share Posted August 4, 2001 yes but the enemy patrol wouldn't feel threatend by an insane downed pilot talking to a tree stump...then when they pick him up he can kill them all and steal there truck and run for the border...and yes Zoom I do get the concept of boot camp, I just get bored real fast with nothing to do...course in the woods I suppose the 5 hours it takes me to start a fire will be good for passing time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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