The_Catto Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 W0ot!!!! Hold up ... I'm not sure if I like that or not Ah, thats one of my greatest talents ... I can get annoying, but its a good annoying. Not an ... annoying ... annoying .. if you .. take my meaning :S ... Woah .. confused! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted October 22, 2008 Share Posted October 22, 2008 Always 2 there are, Master and Apprentice... that is the way of the Sith. No matter how annoying, ha ha ha ha{continues to laugh randomly} Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Catto Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 Shotgun being the Master More powerful in the art of annoyance am I ANYways .. A bit off topic. So, in saying that .... Chapter! Chapter! Chapter! :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted October 23, 2008 Share Posted October 23, 2008 He's more annyoing! Ahhh! Bring forth the chapter or we will mercilessly annoy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endorenna Posted October 23, 2008 Author Share Posted October 23, 2008 AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (runs screaming into the night) Dangit, forgot something! (runs back, grabs laptop, and runs screaming into the night again) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andurilblade Posted November 14, 2008 Share Posted November 14, 2008 Special thanks to my beta reader, Andurilblade, whose creative streak and superior knowledge of grammer has helped me immensely! 'Scuse me? It's "creative streak and superior knowledge of grammar HAVE helped me immensely!" Just thought I'd stop by and do what I do best! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endorenna Posted November 14, 2008 Author Share Posted November 14, 2008 ^ (whispers to everyone else) See what I mean? Oh, update on the chapter. I've had to throw out about four roughdrafts, but I think I almost have it. Sorry about the delay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endorenna Posted November 18, 2008 Author Share Posted November 18, 2008 Chapter 5 Change of Hands Sri’s lightsaber lopped the head off a holographic massiff as it leaped towards her, and her other saber stabbed into the chest of a holographic assassin droid. She whirled and brought her lightsabers up to block the blaster bolts sprayed at her from three droids and a Rodian. Sri ran toward the holograms. One strike sliced a droid and the Rodian in half, and two quick flicks of her wrist dismembered the others. She paused, frozen in mid-motion. Her lightsabers hissed off, and she hung them on her belt. The Twi’lek girl turned around and crossed her arms. Clapping came from several yards away. Kazic and a roughly-dressed man were standing there, watching Sri. Seven guards stood behind them. The Mirialan guest stopped clapping and exclaimed, “Great, Kazic! I’ve never seen a female as good as she is!” Kazic’s white teeth flashed an avaricious smile. “So, you think she’s ready to go into the arena itself, Dant?” “Ready? She’s more than ready!” Dant’s blue eyes settled on one of the lightsabers hanging from her hip. “How’d you teach her to use lightsabers? I hear only a Jedi can do that.” “It took her a few weeks to learn how to balance the weightless blades, but she managed it. Handles them rather well, don’t you think?” Ugh, she could feel it. Another proud smirk had appeared on Kazic’s face. A slight smile of her own crept into her eyes. No matter. She’d wipe that smirk off Kazic’s face minutes from now. “Doesn’t she have a long-range weapon? Lightsabers are all well and good, but in the end, a blaster’s better.” Kazic laughed. “Always the smuggler, aren’t you, Dant? Don’t worry about your investment, she’s well armed.” Dant shook his head stubbornly. “I’m not gonna sponsor her under my name until I know her complete arsenal.” Sri’s master gave a weary sigh and shifted his weight onto his right leg. “All right, all right. When fully equipped, she carries two throwing knives strapped to her upper arms and a vibrodagger strapped to the back of her thigh.” “And, of course, her lightsabers.” “Of course.” Dant ran his fingers through his thick black hair and shrugged. “Still think she ought to carry a blaster, but I guess she’ll do fine with all that junk.” Both the scruffy guest and Kazic strolled closer, the guards close behind them. Sri felt Dant’s eyes perusing her athletic figure. The scum! She’d make sure he died along with her master! The smuggler asked Kazic casually, “What are you planning on dressing her in?” Kazic hesitated a moment, then he replied flatly, “I haven’t decided yet.” “I’m sure I could come up with a few…ideas?” Dant’s rough hand slowly fingered her smooth red lekku. The Twi’lek turned her head toward the smuggler, her black eyes fixing him with a cold stare as her hand moved toward her lightsaber in an unspoken threat. Dant withdrew his hand immediately and took a step back. Sri relaxed and returned to her former position. He wouldn’t touch her again. Dant was obviously shaken by his moment-long encounter with Sri’s pent-up wrath. He asked nervously, “Kazic, what if she tries to escape?” Sri’s master smirked once more. “I have more than enough guards to recapture her, or kill her, if it becomes necessary.” “How many is ‘more than enough’?” “A hundred and fifty, all armed with blaster rifles, along with ten others armed with grenades. No one could stand against an all-out assault, even our little Twi’lek here.” Kazic turned on his heel and strode towards the door. “So, we split the winnings fifty-fifty. I supply the girl, you supply the name. Be sure to remove all traces to me. Cor would have me killed if he found out abou—“ Dant gave a gasp of horror and pain as two shining blue blades of energy seemed to grow out of his chest. Sri dropped, dragging her sabers through the smuggler’s body as she whirled to face the guards. She spun to the side, narrowly avoiding seven blaster shots and simultaneously slamming into Kazic’s legs, tripping him. Screams echoed in the far corners of the warehouse as the guards met their fate. Sri glanced toward Kazic and saw that he was just getting to his feet. The girl darted past her master and pressed the locking button beside the door. It slid shut, sealing Kazic in with the vengeful Lethan. Sri whirled, twirling her lightsabers. Kazic was going for a comlink on his belt. The girl dashed forward and cut it in two with a swift, precise stroke that missed Kazic by a fraction of an inch. He stumbled back and stared at her in mortal terror. Sri’s lightsabers slowly rotated with an even, ominous hum. Her eyes glittered with hate as she hissed in Rattataki, “You think you own me? Get a sword from the crate over there, and we’ll find out who the true master is!” She nodded towards a box of cortosis-woven swords her instructors had used. Kazic saw that he had no choice but to do as she said. He shed his rich cloak and quickly walked over to the box she had indicated. His hand closed around a sword, and he slowly strode back towards her. He regained his arrogance and ordered her haughtily, “Stand down, or you’ll scream for days before I’m through!” Sri grinned maliciously and glided forward. “Pray I don’t return the favor!” Her lightsabers flashed forward with two quick but easily parried strikes. She liquidly dodged a few strokes from his blade, then her lightsabers wove in twice more, purposefully not hitting him but getting close enough to singe his skin. Kazic struck fast and hard, trying to disarm her. Sri laughed as she spun out of the way of his flashing blade. She crossed her sabers and caught his sword in the crook. Kazic pressed forward, certain that he could overcome her with brute force. The girl braced her feet on the dusty rock floor and whispered, “Time to die, Kazic!” Sri shoved his sword up above his head and kicked him in the face. Kazic’s large nose broke, and he stumbled back. The Twi’lek’s eyes glowed with satisfaction as his scream of pain filled her ears. The humming suddenly snapped off. Kazic’s eyes widened in surprise as the Lethan seemingly disappeared into thin air! He whirled. The slave wasn’t there. He whirled again, his sword at the ready. She wasn’t there, either. The door was closed, so she couldn’t have escaped. But he had to take advantage of this opportunity. Kazic ran towards the door. Suddenly, Sri appeared in front of him, her blue lightsabers spinning erratically. Moments later, Kazic’s sword flew from his hand and clattered across the floor. The burning blue energy came down on Kazic’s right elbow, severing his forearm. He screamed and fell to his knees. Sri stepped back slightly, savoring the sight of Kazic, helpless and kneeling. She snapped, “Look at me, Kazic!” The terrified, wounded man didn’t move; he just kept screaming. “Look at me, or I swear I’ll cut out your heart!” Kazic gasped out an unintelligible reply as his screams subsided to moans. Sri prowled around him and breathed, “I’ve dreamed of this moment for a long time, Kazic. I’ve often spent whole nights pondering how to make you pay for beating me!” Her lightsaber waved only a centimeter from his back. “One thing I’ve always wanted to do was cut out your spine—slowly, vertebra by vertebra. Believe me, I can miss the spinal cord itself and keep you alive for what will seem an eternity!” Kazic gave a low moan of horror, and he stared up at her. “P-please—!” Sri shrieked savagely, “How many times have I screamed for mercy, and you refused me! I won’t give you what you wouldn’t give me!” Her lightsaber flashed away from his back and hovered at his throat. She started moving it up towards his chin, fraction by fraction. Kazic swallowed hard and rasped out in a whisper, “Girl, I-I swear, if you let me go, y-you’ll have your freedom and passage to wherever you want! I’ll give you money, I’ll give you anything!” His neatly cut brown hair was plastered against his head by sweat and blood. Sri sniffed contemptuously. “My lust for revenge will not be slaked until you’re dead at my feet!” Kazic’s whole body shook with fear as he begged, “Please, girl, let me live! I-I swear, I’ll give you everything I own, I’ll—“ “You’ll die more slowly if you don’t shut up!” Sri snapped harshly. Kazic froze as he stared into her unnaturally dark eyes. He was trapped, a victim of his own cruelty. A glowing blue saber blade passed between his face and hers. Kazic braced himself for the first of many inevitable blows. Sri whirled, a curse spewing from her mouth as the door burst open! She deflected a few blaster shots back at the guards as they poured into the room. Sri darted behind Kazic, grabbed him by the back of his shirt, and lifted him up in front of her. She couldn’t let him get away, not now! The Twi’lek stabbed her master in the back, impaling one of the guards with the same stroke. She dropped the bodies in a heap on the floor and concentrated on the other guards. Sri dodged farther back from the door, quickly assessing the situation. Moments after the door had blown open, at least twenty men had run into that warehouse, and now, their numbers had swelled to over fifty men. She needed to get her back against a wall before they surrounded her. Sri nimbly dodged even further back until she hit a wall of boxes. The Twi’lek girl’s sabers moved faster than the eye could see, throwing the blaster bolts back at the guards. They were several yards away from her now, afraid to come closer to the flailing blue energy she wielded. The girl fought on steadily. She could see out the door; there weren’t any more of them out there. She’d almost won! Sri’s head jerked up as a small, round metal ball flew through the air towards her. She recognized it instantly. It was a flash grenade, a particularly powerful version that the guards used. Sri flicked off her lightsaber and hung it on her belt with one swift movement. The girl darted to the side and caught the grenade just before it hit the ground. She flung it back towards the guards. It exploded en route. Sri was thrown back against the makeshift wall and fell to the ground, stunned by the bright flash and sonic burst from the grenade. Her lightsaber rolled out of her limp hand and quietly deactivated. Meanwhile, many of the guards were in the same predicament. The man who had thrown the grenade was stumbling around blindly. Another mercenary guard was groping around on the floor, trying to find his blaster rifle. Another grenade slipped from the belt of the grenadier as he lurched by, and the mercenary’s hand strayed across it. His finger touched a button, and the grenade detonated. Shrapnel singed the air as it tore through the remaining guards, killing or mortally wounding all of them. All was quiet for a few minutes, the silence breaking only for the groans of dying men. A few guards dressed in armor differing from that of the dead and dying walked slowly in, their blaster rifles at the ready. They surveyed the room for a few moments, and one of them stepped back into the hall and beckoned. A tall, broad male Rattataki strode into the warehouse and glanced at the body of Kazic, which was half-buried under other corpses. His dark grey eyes stood out against his ghostly, chalk-white skin as they settled on a wounded guard. The Rattataki stalked over to him and asked callously, “Why are the floors of this place running with blood? Answer me!” The man coughed up some blood and replied weakly, “Lord Cor, Kazic was going to enter a slave in the arena. He had to get her sponsored under another name.” He winced and choked on more blood as it came up from his punctured lungs. “She got out of hand, and we were trying to subdue her when—when—” More blood trickled from the corner of his mouth, and he choked. “A dangerous slave has escaped?” The guard’s lips curled, and he gave a slight laugh before choking again. “Nah, she’s still here. Right over there, dead, just like all my pals she killed!” The Rattataki cocked his head and knelt beside the fallen man. He asked smoothly, “Aren’t you the one who told me Kazic was up to something here?” The guard nodded, his bloody lips still twisted into a grin. There was a quiet, barely perceptible noise, reminiscent of a fruit being scored by a scalpel. The guard’s face morphed into an expression of blank horror when he realized what had happened. The Rattataki leaned closer and whispered into his ear, “Once a traitor, always a traitor.” A long, sleek silver knife slid out of the guard’s heart. The broad, white-skinned man stood, wiping his bloody knife on the sleeve of his expensive brown-and-blue cloak before concealing it in the hidden sheath strapped just below his wrist. Kazic had been hiding someone valuable here. Too bad she was dead. Still, it wouldn’t hurt to take a look at the corpse. Cor raised one eyebrow when he saw what was lying beside the wall. He’d expected a middle-aged woman, old enough to have years of experience under her belt but young enough to still be in good condition. It was a—teenager, and contrary to what the guard had believed, she was quite alive, just stunned. He studied her with a critical eye. She was fourteen, fifteen at the most, and in excellent condition. Her cheap brown tank top and leather pants displayed that fact for all to see. Cor bent down and picked up something close to her hand. Well, wasn’t that interesting? A lightsaber? The weapon of a Jedi, only usable by select, highly trained individuals in the galaxy. Ah, there was another one on her belt! This was a valuable girl, far more so than the average slave. No wonder Kazic had tried to keep her a secret from him! No matter. His sources would have informed him of her true owner soon enough, even if one of Kazic’s guards hadn’t sold him out. This incident only made it simpler. Cor reached for her other lightsaber, and he momentarily wondered when Kazic had purchased her. Maybe he could find out from one of Kazic’s surviving servants. Enough of this; he had business to attend to. The Rattataki motioned for his personal guards to come to him as he stood. He ordered them coldly, “Find out where she was kept and put her back there. Do not damage her in any way!” Cor whirled and strode out of the room, the blood-soaked hem of his robe painting a red trail a few feet past the door. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Here it is, my loyal Sith Lords! Sorry for the delay...BFA, put down that lightsaber this instant! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted November 18, 2008 Share Posted November 18, 2008 AWESOME ENDORENNA! This next chapter is excellent, I'm prepped for the next one! I'm sure Mr. BFA agrees, should he put down the lightsaber.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endorenna Posted November 20, 2008 Author Share Posted November 20, 2008 Agh, I didn't reply! I'm really glad you enjoyed it! I'll try to get the next chapter out soon...hopefully by Christmas... Any critical comments? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HIGH ON PIE 14 Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 One word: Badass! Sri' was such a badass this chapter, taking down all this guards. The dialogue about the spine was exceptionally entertaining. I would not want to mess with her! I'm glad they all got what they deserved. Poor Sri' though, captured again...and she was so close! By Christmass eh? If I was not such a slow writer...well I'll let BFA do the begging and the demanding. Excellent chapter Endorenna! ~HOP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Catto Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 Holy freakin crap I was too consumed in being my normal Sith Lord self that I completely and utterly forget to check out this awesomeness of a chapter. Nice work, Endo! Very well done this chapter is! As HoP said, the whole dialogue about the spine was re-he-he-heally entertaining to read. I could feel her hatred as if it was my own. But all of that work, only to be captured again .. Poo Sri. Oh well. I'm sure she'll get another chance and then it'll be a success. Oh ...and I DEMAND another chapter before Christmas! :D:D ... Make it a Christmas present, if you will ...For me though, don't worry these other guys, hahhahahahahaha (just kidding people's ) ANYways... can't wait till next chapter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endorenna Posted December 3, 2008 Author Share Posted December 3, 2008 Don't worry! I've sped up my schedule, and I intend to have two chapters out by Christmas! I'm glad you noticed the bit about the spine. It was really, really fun writing that part! Also, I'm very happy about your description of Sri! 'Twas my intention to give that impression. Am I not cruel to my characters? I'll have the next chapter out ASAP! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 HURRAH! BY CHRISTMAS!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Catto Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 ^^^ QFE QFE QFE QFE QFE ^^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 Well, the Sith have decided not to eat..erm, annoy you, Just post soon! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Catto Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 I would go on an eating strike until the next chapter but I probably wouldn't last the day, lol. Hmm .. I might go and see what Gina is up too .... "hint, hint, wink, wink:xp: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 Oy...well good luck Mr. BFA! We will cease from our rather interesting eating natures until the next chapter.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevron 7 locke Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 Great work Endo! i just started reading this today and i loved it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Endorenna Posted December 3, 2008 Author Share Posted December 3, 2008 Ty very much, Chev! Glad you enjoyed it, and I hope you continue to enjoy it. BFA! CQ! No! Don't go on a hunger strike! Please! I don't want to lose my Sith Lords! What if Jedi attack you in your weakened state! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted December 3, 2008 Share Posted December 3, 2008 Oh, okay, we won't do anything drastic like a hunger strike....we'll just eat diet food:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Catto Posted December 4, 2008 Share Posted December 4, 2008 Last time I went on a hunger strike, I was trying to buy a CD which was $21 ... I only had $18 ... Me and a mate staged a hunger strike out the front of a shop for close to five hours before the guy came outand told us to get lost. I said, "nuh huh. I'm going on a hunger strike until you can let me buy this CD! I only have this much and it's only a couple of dollars lower than the original price. I can't get any more money." (The rest was for rent and what not) That was the first steps of becoming the annoying Sith Lord I am today. I got the CD DIET FOOD!? Ewwwww! Time for full assault hunger strike! Drastic is my ... not-so middle name, CQ. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CommanderQ Posted December 4, 2008 Share Posted December 4, 2008 Alright! If the master of the Sith Lords of Annoyingness says hunger-strike, then hunger-strike it is!! Well....my middle name isn't either, so, we're in the same boat with food!!!!! Oh dearie...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chevron 7 locke Posted December 4, 2008 Share Posted December 4, 2008 If you two are the sith lords of annoyance, then I'm the sith lord of insanity:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andurilblade Posted December 4, 2008 Share Posted December 4, 2008 Okay, I know I'm not really supposed to be here, but I just wanted to make public my ardent admiration for Endorenna's warped imagination. First of all, your favorite and mine: “One thing I’ve always wanted to do was cut out your spine—slowly, vertebra by vertebra." And then the excerpt which made me shiver/run screaming into the night/wonder just what goes on inside that odd little brain of hers: There was a quiet, barely perceptible noise, reminiscent of a fruit being scored by a scalpel. Is she not gruesome! I nominate her Mistress of the Macabre, Duchess of Darkness, Queen of Terror, and other rotten things! Who is with me?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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