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Lexx's Mafia, a real problem for a real forum!


Divine Spirit

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It started out as harmless list. Its only intention was a way of honouring friends and having fun but it all went tragically wrong. This is the tale of…

 

Lexx’s Mafia

 

In recent weeks of posting on this forum, I noticed an up and coming trend of ‘lists’ and one of these lists was created by the one and only female regular poster in the Swamp: Lexx. She said that she started Lexx’s Heroes “as a sort of honour list of my friends that I had made in these forums”, which is perfectly ok but this was just the start of an underground empire running the Lucasforums!

 

 

Lexx was always a popular poster on Lucasforums. She was witty, clever, charming and most of all: female. All these attributes meant that she made many friends in Yoda’s Swamp and after a while, many of them were begging to join Lexx’s Heroes. This desire of being in the list escalated into a full-scale craze throughout the swamp and soon, everybody had heard of Lexx’s Heroes. This was Lexx’s Heroes in its prime, a successful and amusing entity in Lucasforums but this new found glory meant that Lexx’s Heroes stands on the edge of a knife, stray but a little and it would fail, to the ruin of all. Yet hope remains as long as the company is true.

 

From this time onwards, Lexx was untouchable. If she ever had any bad comments coming her way her heroes would stand up for her and flame the person who dared to badmouth her. In fact, the heroes would get rid of anything that stood in the way of Lexx. This system ran on the pure desire to be faithful to Lexx: the heroes prospered while the posters who weren’t members could only wish to be a hero. Using tactics to get their way, the heroes continued until no one could have a bad opinion about Lexx. This truly was a Mafia-like organisation.

 

But one day, someone came along who defied the system. Someone who stood up for what they believed and spoke against Lexx’s Heroes. This person was Darth Clem! His actions acted like a shock wave against the Heroes and unfortunately the heroes weren’t able to protect Lexx when Clem spoke his opinion and used to the cushy protection of many other posters to protect her, Lexx was shocked by the comments made from Clem, a popular poster, and she decided to end Lexx’s Heroes!

 

From the beginning, bad things were destined for the ‘Heroes’ and Lexx’s Heroes was about to meet its destiny. On 14th August 2002 at precisely 2:37pm GMT, Lexx made a thread stating the end of Lexx’s heroes and there was havoc on the forums! The Heroes came to the defence of Lexx and started to flame Clem but nothing seemed to persuade Lexx to start the list again. Infuriated by this, the heroes set about getting revenge. They offended Clem until he finally chose to leave Lucasforums after many months of happy posting.

 

Some people accepted Clem’s departure and others tried to stop him from going. This decision is still left hanging in the balance. The forums are presently in turmoil; who knows what will happen next? Whatever does take place you know you heard it here first! And remember readers, keep it strictly HUSH HUSH!

 

 

 

This thread was brought to you through Divine Spirit's Satire Newsletter. Do NOT take it seriously!

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After popular demand (sounds strange but its true! see here ) I have managed to photograph the Lexx's Mafia crime boss in an exclusive Divine Spirit Satirical Newsletter special!!!

 

I caught a picture of lexx revealing herself to neo.....with sexy consequences! :D unfortunatly, due to the graphic nature of these photos iv had to cover up certain parts of the photo - see if you can guess which! :D

 

Here it is:

 

trinity.jpg

 

EDIT - as a sort of caption contest, see if you can guess what theyre saying! :D

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The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.

 

lexxthrone.jpg

 

:D

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