Acrylic Posted May 7, 2005 Share Posted May 7, 2005 Originally posted by StarWarsPhreak If you're really going to end a friendship on a trivial matter of someone's sexual preferences... I just think that's sad. She never said she was going to. But, if you're talking about that in general, then yeah, I agree with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spider AL Posted May 7, 2005 Share Posted May 7, 2005 Personally I'd wait for my friend to tell me. I wouldn't approach her and ask directly. It's an interesting question though. What if one of my friends decided he was gay? How would that affect me? I mean, like it or not, friendships are much more difficult to maintain with people who are prospective sexual partners. That normally occurs between men and women of course (it's sometimes tough to maintain a friendship with a member of the opposite sex when you're both hetero) but if one's friend realised that he was homosexual, that relationship would then change from a friendship where sexual desire between you will NEVER be a problem... to a friendship where sexual desire MAY become a problem. That sense of utter security would be gone. I mean, I'm one handsome sod. If one of my mates turned out to be gay, I'd be worried that he'd feel an uncontrollable urge to jump my bones, just because I'm so damned hot. No, seriously. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ET Warrior Posted May 7, 2005 Share Posted May 7, 2005 Originally posted by Spider AL I'd be worried that he'd feel an uncontrollable urge to jump my bones, just because I'm so damned hot. That's because your ego is so massive I do believe it's actually started to eat itself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spider AL Posted May 7, 2005 Share Posted May 7, 2005 Ha! Says you. To prove myself right, I'd post a photo of my fabulously symmetrical, manly visage for you all to gawp at in astonished jealousy... If I weren't too clever to give up my anonymity, that is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redwing Posted May 7, 2005 Share Posted May 7, 2005 Originally posted by Spider AL Personally I'd wait for my friend to tell me. I wouldn't approach her and ask directly. It's an interesting question though. What if one of my friends decided he was gay? How would that affect me? I mean, like it or not, friendships are much more difficult to maintain with people who are prospective sexual partners. That normally occurs between men and women of course (it's sometimes tough to maintain a friendship with a member of the opposite sex when you're both hetero) but if one's friend realised that he was homosexual, that relationship would then change from a friendship where sexual desire between you will NEVER be a problem... to a friendship where sexual desire MAY become a problem. That sense of utter security would be gone. I mean, I'm one handsome sod. If one of my mates turned out to be gay, I'd be worried that he'd feel an uncontrollable urge to jump my bones, just because I'm so damned hot. No, seriously. If you base your sense of security on a friendship on lack of sexual feeling, there may be something wrong. At least in my opinion. Maybe it's all the bisexual people I know. (I swear, 50% of my friends... with a few being gay, and the rest straight...) I have honestly never had a problem with this. Well, true, a couple of my friends I count myself lucky I've never had sexual feelings for them, since I know they'd freak out over it... but I am very good friends with both a former crush of mine and a current crush of mine (and they both know about it). I would say more, since I do have alot of but I still consider my gender and sexuality to be in the none-of-everybody's-business category but trust me, Spider-AL, you're worrying over stuff and nonsense. ^_^ Originally posted by ET Warrior That's because your ego is so massive I do believe it's actually started to eat itself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spider AL Posted May 8, 2005 Share Posted May 8, 2005 If you base your sense of security on a friendship on lack of sexual feeling, there may be something wrong.Oh I never said I based my friendships on anything. I'm merely pointing out the fact that one's friend "coming out" would change the nature of the relationship at a fundamental level. Gender and sexuality have a lot to do with how we relate to one another on a subconscious level, after all. What we do and who we are are very closely entwined. I think most of the "freak out" factor in a situation such as STTCT described must stem not from the fact that the friend's gay, but instead from the fact that the friend is SUDDENLY gay. That someone one knew and thought one had a good handle on now has a different sexuality than the sexuality one thought they had. And as I stated before, relating to a prospective sexual partner is different and in some cases more difficult than relating to an ostensibly a-sexual individual. (As regards one's own person) trust me, Spider-AL, you're worrying over stuff and nonsense. ^_^I don't think so, I am after all the hottest piece of flesh ever born of mortal woman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surfnshannon Posted May 9, 2005 Author Share Posted May 9, 2005 Heeeee - I'm not worried my friends gonna jump me! Not in the least. Okay let me try to explain once more I've known this friend since the beginning of High School. We hung out all the time and you know how note passing was a big thing in HS? Well we'd write novels. Discussing all the guys we liked etc. She said she liked this one boy all through high school. Now I'm not saying she couldn't of made this discovery two days ago etc. I'm just saying this is how I knew her. She would talk about our friends whether she saw them kissing (these two girls we knew) and would talk about how nasty it was. I don't remember if I said it was nasty - more like shocked and was like really? wow...I had no idea. We've maintained our friendship outside of high school and like I said she was in my wedding. Now she's always been talking to me about hot guys etc and of course the one boy in high school. Which I told her she was way way too picky on guys and she needs to start looking for someone else besides that one lost love. So - when someone you've known for years has always talked to you about liking one sex - never ever tells you that she might be looking at the other sex *which is fine and you find out from the NET on a site that you can just type in her name. I find that kinda harsh. Because she is living a completly different life than she led me to believe. I mean like totally different. I just feel like she wasn't honest? Was she lying to me? Maybe herself? Did she think I couldn't handle it? I feel kinda sad about that. No I didn't expect an email "I'm Proud and Gay" parade outside my house with a Gay Pride Flag. No - but in one of those conversations about who she liked could she have said Well I l like this one hot girl? I would have been fine - seeing who she's with on the net though I'd have to say She could do sooo much better! I guess I don't know. This is the basis of our friendship for a long time was hot guys. Now what the heck? I don't want to loose our friendship if she thinks that she can't talk to me. I tried to email her and say Hey whats new? told her how I was doing and she hasn't emailed me. I'm wondering if I'm not apart of this new life any more. Sucks. I hate to loose a really good friend . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZBomber Posted May 9, 2005 Share Posted May 9, 2005 Maybe it's an inside joke or something with one of her friends? I dunno, she can't seem to find it that important, I wouldn't bring the topic up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Sitherino Posted May 9, 2005 Share Posted May 9, 2005 I guess just don't worry about it. She'll tell you when she's ready. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Windu Posted May 9, 2005 Share Posted May 9, 2005 Yeah... there's not much to this one other than it's a) an inside joke for friends b) she's discovered this since the last time you spoke c) she's hiding it from you for fear of judgement d) she wants to tell you but doesn't know how. Whichever it may be, just be patient. It'll come to light soon enough, just >_> act cool <_<. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarkLord60 Posted May 10, 2005 Share Posted May 10, 2005 I checked the site out and typed in my name and last and one profile came up and the guy's name is Josh to and obviously the last name and almost same age but he was gay, Uhhh I am not lol. I don't go that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
acdcfanbill Posted May 10, 2005 Share Posted May 10, 2005 well if it makes you feel better, i just found out Halford was gay, it kind of makes his dress make sense, but i felt weirded out as well... yea, i know, i live under a rock... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pie™ Posted May 10, 2005 Share Posted May 10, 2005 Originally posted by acdcfanbill well if it makes you feel better, i just found out Halford was gay, it kind of makes his dress make sense, but i felt weirded out as well... yea, i know, i live under a rock... Was it really that hard to tell? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
acdcfanbill Posted May 10, 2005 Share Posted May 10, 2005 i thought he just liked leather and spikes... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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