[FIC] Elliot's Story

[JediKnight707]

I pressed the backspace button. I didn't like how the chapter turned out. I mean, it probably would have been fine, but I don't just settle for fine! I want JEEZ JEDI_KNIGHT, THAT'S AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!

[JediKnight707]

This chapter is somewhat short, but says a lot. Plus, I wanted to post it on my birthday ^_^

 

-----------------------------------

--6 Years after Order 66—

 

It’d been six years since the cataclysmic end to the Jedi. Much had happened between that period. The first six months were extremely hectic, as many Jedi were still being hunted. After about a year, things had settled down, and life had just about gotten back to normal. The only real differences were slightly higher taxes and higher security on most planets.

A couple of months after Alex had died, Obi-Wan had come down with a mysterious illness. Elliot and Obi-Wan alike were stumped by the disease. Nothing they had ever heard of had ever done what Obi-Wan’s disease was doing: eating his insides, for lack of a softer phrase.

Elliot had taken him to the doctor’s, and they’d run some tests, and they too were stumped. He’d been called back for some more through tests, and the EKG scan had shown some of his heart valves were slowly deteriorating. And upon those valves, and even on his heart, there were small, yet noticeable, squiggly lines—they turned out to be wyrms. Wyrms that were slowly eating his heart away.

When the doctors had finally figured out how to help Obi-Wan, it was too late. He spent his final days on a hospital bed, which smelt like bleach to Elliot, sleeping from sedatives.

He died three days after being admitted.

Elliot buried him next to Alex, and from that moment on, decided not to be a Jedi. He was always going to be in connection with the Force, that much was for sure, but he’d no longer use it. He disassembled his lightsaber, keeping the parts, but having them all separated.

He moved to Coruscant when he was eleven, and squatted in an apartment he found. It was in one of the slums, and there was almost no light. In his apartment, there was a mattress he had found, two blankets, and a bathroom.

Elliot started racing speeders in the lowest regions. He had never lost a single race, and was considered to be one of the greatest pilots ever to live in the lower regions. Elliot wasn’t sure if he was a good pilot because of his Force connection, or just natural talent. He had to use the money for food and such, so he just stole speeders when he could. The models he stole always seemed to be one step behind everyone else’s, but he didn’t care. He’d still win the race. Elliot was now sixteen, and was all the normal teenager, aside from being somewhat tall.

 

Do you think that you can hide from me? Do you? I killed thousands of Jedi, I can kill one more. You try to sever your connection with the Force, you try to destroy your lightsaber, but it won’t help you. You’ll always be a Jedi. I can feel you threw the Force. I don’t care if you can hardly feel it, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter how powerful you are with the Force, you reek with the scent of the Jedi. I’m going to kill you.

Elliot awoke with a start. He looked around in that crazed panic people have when they have a nightmare, before realizing he was in his apartment. Who was that voice? Was it just a dream?

He glanced at his moon-watch. It read 3:43 AM. Elliot shook his head, shaking it of the fuzziness. Elliot always had a horrible time sleeping, and the little he got was always plagued with forbidden nightmares of Alex dying. But this nightmare was new.

Elliot walked to the bathroom, still somewhat shaken by that voice. The voice…it was so…sinister. Like even evil couldn’t describe it.

He got to the bathroom and looked at himself in the filthy mirror. He rubbed the small stubble on his face, and went to pick up his razor off the sink’s edge. His hands were shaking, and he knocked it off the sink.

“Crap,” he muttered, and bent down to pick it up. He bent down just in time—a blaster bolt flew through the space where his head had been half a second before.

[Diego Varen]

Happy Birthday JK (Checking your Profile, your several months younger than me). Good Chapter all the same. I'm also stumped by that mysterious disease.

[JediKnight707]

A new one will probably be up by next week or so, and

expect a little Yoda, somewhat soon, anyway

[The_Catto]

Again, nice chapter. I like where this is going ... "Patiently waiting for the next chapter" .. What?? it's not up yet??? :S Damn! lol.

[Hallucination]

Good chapter, but I'm disappointed you killed Obi-Wan.

 

I can feel you threw the Force.

I didn't know that it was possible to throw the Force.

[JediKnight707]

>_>

<_<

I wasn't sure! I was going to put "through", but...I didn't

Do you realize how tense you made me when I noticed that you were the latest one who commented on this thread? I was expecting this laundry list of errors I'd made, yet you only picked one

[HK-42]

JEEZ JEDI_KNIGHT, THAT'S AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Maverick5770]

Great chapters, but it sucks that you killed Obi. Keeep it up Jedi _ Knight _ 707

[JediKnight707]

I've just now started on the new chapter, and so far so good. I usually post chapters, and then immediately start on the next one, but it was my birthday week, so I took some time off. I got Oblivion and Empire at War, and there both AWESOME!!!!!!!

The real problem is that my monitor is like 60 years old, so Oblivion has pretty crappy graphics, and I've gotta fast travel everywhere. I'm fine in the cities and in dungeons and such, but if I walk outside, and into the grass, BAM! lag.

[Jae Onasi]

We'll all be waiting to see how Elliot gets out of this cliffhanger, too.

Medical info was accurate--I'll sometimes make up some test names to give it a more 'future' feel. However, this was fine, too, much as I was sorry to see Obi-wan die.

Heh, who would have thought that shaving could save your life.

[JediKnight707]

Medical info was accurate--I'll sometimes make up some test names to give it a more 'future' feel.

 

Whew! I actually did research for that particular part, trying to make sure I got the right test names for the heart and all. I wasn't sure if an EKG scan was for heart or brain, so I did some google-ing.

[Jae Onasi]

Good job! EKG (for electrokardiogram--I think it was originally invented in Germany, but I'd have to check it--'kardio' or 'cardio' for heart) for the heart and EEG (electroencephalogram--the encephalo part for brain) is for the brain.

I forgot to say Happy Birthday--happy belated one.

 

The Force dream was wicked. Made me not want to go to sleep, too.

[JediKnight707]

^^

Glad to know that I can write scary. I always figured that when I try to write scary stuff, it comes out cheezy. I've read some of Stephen King, but I hate scary stuff in general, so whenever I try to write something scary, it seems to be just generic. I was going to cut that dream out, but the chapter was short enough as it was.

[JediKnight707]

Hey guys! Sorry for the delay, but I think that when I do post the chapter, it'll be worth it. I was bouncing around two ideas in my head for like a week, and I finally chose one and have decided to roll with it. The only problem is I come up with my greatest ideas when I a) am in the shower or b) am about to fall asleep. So, at those moments, I have no way of writing them down.

For a few hints on what's coming, (these are real spoilers if you can decipher the code) read these spoiler(s):

 

 

It shall have connections with a Circus of Freaks and be very, very Creppy <- an intentional misspell

 

[JediKnight707]

It's here! The next chapter! This one is totally different than any I've read here, so trust me, this is different. I'd been milling around with this idea for awhile, and decided to finally take it! Hope you guys like it (and the chapter's really long, over 2000 words!):

 

Elliot immediately straightened up instinctively, a big mistake. Another blaster bolt flew past his head, inches away from him and his nose.

Elliot’s brain kicked in, and he hit the floor. Another blaster bolt flew threw the air.

Elliot looked around wildly, trying to see where it was coming from. He noticed a few holes in the door, and assumed that was where the shots were coming from. He crawled over to the door, and kicked it, closing it.

He stayed down for a few minutes, and no more shots came. Elliot started to rise tentatively, and had stood fully, when his body flew back down to the floor, without him controlling it. Three more blaster bolts ripped across the air a second later.

How did my body know when to duck? Elliot asked himself. And then he felt it. It was distant, but there. The Force.

He felt renewed with this knowledge, that the Force hadn’t abandoned him like he had originally thought. He felt more alive, yet so much calmer.

Elliot closed his eyes and slowly drew in breath. He tried to sense where the blaster bolts were coming from, but apparently, he wasn’t that in tune with the Force.

Elliot scanned the room, and found gold. The window had several nice little holes. He looked back at the door, momentarily forgetting that it was closed. He couldn’t close the curtains on the window, because there were no curtains. He looked around for something to use to shield him, yet found nothing. Even the tub didn’t have a shower curtain—the only visitors he had were women, and by the time he used the shower, they’d already seen him naked.

Elliot pondered the dilemma. There was no way he could open the door without being seen, so basically, there was no escape.

He lay there, prone on the cold generic tile ground, wondering how to get out of his particular predicament for several minutes, until the answer came to him.

He positioned himself several feet from the window, and waited for the right moment. He stood up, and before the mystery shooter could react, ran quickly, and jumped out the window. Even though he lived in the slums, he was still hundreds of stories above the ground of Coruscant. He tried to grab onto one of the passing speeders, but always seemed to be just out of reach.

Yet, several hundred meters below him, there seemed to be a speeder, with its top down, hovering where he was eventually going to go. Elliot didn’t need the Force to know that that was bad. It could be someone just trying to help out, but it didn’t appear so.

Well, whether or not I want to get in this speeder is a moot point, I’m going to land in it anyway, he thought.

He readjusted his position in air for a more comfortable landing. Though he had no reason to distrust the person driving the speeder, Elliot felt a strange aura coming from him. It wasn’t so much the Force, more of common sense. The person driving the speeder appeared to be hooded, and dressed in all black. When Elliot squinted his eyes, he could barely make out hands on the steering wheel. But these were no normal hands; they were mangled, wrinkled, and a finger was missing on his right hand, two on his left.

When he got within fifty meters of the speeder, it slowly started descending, trying to make the landing more comfortable, so it seemed.

Eventually, Elliot felt a soft bump, and he was on the seat—which he noticed was crude polyester, old looking—and immediately there was a whirring overhead, as the top flew over his head.

Elliot turned to face his ‘saver’ and said, “Thanks. I’m Ell—”

“Iot,” the man finished for him. “Sixteen years old. Former Jedi, been living on Coruscant for approximetly five years. Former Master, Olivia. Lived in Tatooine for a year. Friends with a girl a year younger than you, named Alex. She was killed by stormtroopers, who were formerly referred to as Clone Troopers at that time.” The speeder descended lower, though Elliot was hardly paying attention to where they were going. His eyes were totally focused on this…man. The man’s face never turned, he just kept his eyes on the road—or so it appeared to Elliot.

“Wh—who—who the hell are you?” Elliot asked in a terrified, high-pitched voice. His heart was beating fast, yet, despite the added blood, Elliot’s face was pale.

“I have been called too many names.” The voice was sinister, calm, but sinister. Elliot blinked rapidly in succession.

“Ho—how do you know all that about me?” he asked, in that same, terrified high-pitched voice.

“If I wanted to, I could know everything about anything. Some may say that’s too much to know, but others would say that’s too little.”

“Are—are you going to kill me?”

“No. But you may kill yourself.”

“Why would I do that?”

“Because when you realize what I do to you, whenever it is that you finally awake, you may never want to live.” Then, without warning, his mangled right hand flew from the steering wheel and struck Elliot in his temple.

Elliot blacked out instantly.

 

Elliot’s eyes fluttered open, and he noticed a woman standing over him. He blinked several times, before a wave of pain crashed through him. He let out a scream, as pain shot threw him. It seemed his body was on fire, and he could do nothing to stop it. His heart, his veins, his arteries, his very blood seemed to be on fire. He closed his eyes, trying to fight the tears of pain. He screamed once more, before he felt something cold and hard being pushed into his neck. He knew no more…

 

Elliot slowly opened his eyes, and he prepared himself for a burst of pain, yet none came. Relieved, he opened his eyes fuller, and allowed them to search his surroundings. From what he could see, he appeared to be in a bed, a blanket over him, in someone’s house. There was a light focused on him, especially his face/neck.

He tried to move his arm, but pain shot up immediately following. He groaned, and stopped trying to move his limb. He heard some feet shuffling, and a few seconds later, there was a woman hovering over him.

His first impression was that she was approximately his age, give or take a few years. She was pretty, with long blond hair, and gray eyes.

“Wh-who are you?” he asked, his voice raspy and weak. His throat was very dry, and it hurt to talk.

She smiled at him, and despite his condition, Elliot had to admit that she was very pretty when she smiled. “M’name’s Emma. Pleasure to meet you…?”

“Elliot. Where am I?”

“You’re about ten stories above the worst part of Coruscant. I happened to find you on the ground—yes, the real ground of Coruscant—and you screamed when I tried to rise you. You were starting to bleed, so I took you back here. You started talking gibberish a few times, something about a man in a hood and what he was going to do to you.

“You’ve got a wound in your neck that won’t heal all too well, and it starts bleeding on and off.” She looked down, and her voice changed, to a tone that sounded…sadder. “I think I know what it is that you’ve got.”

“What is it?” Elliot asked, his tone worried over hers.

“I-I…W-well…” She sighed. “Let’s go to get something to eat. You must be hungry.”

“I-it hurts if I move.”

“I’ll give you an anesthetic. My parents were doctors, so I’m an assistant to them. I’ve got plenty of medical supplies here. I think it’s best if I told you what I’m going to tell you over a meal.”

“I’m not going to take morphine or any type of painkiller. I knew people who were addicted to that crap, and I don’t want that to happen to me. I’ll get up on my own.”

With that, he tried to move his legs. Pain shot up his body, but he grimaced, and continued his movements.

After a few moments of this continuance of pain, once he got out of bed, the pain stopped immediately.

He blinked a few times, obviously confused about this. But, he stood up and stretched regardless.

“Wow, it’s like that bed was cursed or something.” He looked at Emma smiling, but she didn’t smile back.

Elliot furrowed his eyebrows, worried. “Something the matter?”

“No. If you want, you can borrow some old clothes from my brother, who used to live here. His clothes our in the hall closet.” She pointed the way, and Elliot opened the closet.

He chose to wear a cloak, and he walked to the front door. He turned the handle, but Emma told him to stop. “Put on the hood,” she instructed, “and look down.”

“Okay…” He put up the hood, and stepped out into the sunlight. He kept his head down like she instructed, and Emma led the way. She flagged down a taxi, and they stepped inside.

“Mimi’s Café please,” she told the driver.

“That will cost you one hundred and twenty credits,” replied the robotic driver.

Emma handed over the credits, and the cab flew off.

Several minutes later, they arrived at the café and Elliot once again kept his head down as he stepped outside into the sunlight.

The café was a little rundown, but was lit well enough, and there seemed to be a happy atmosphere in the air. They sat down at a table, and a minute or so later, a robot came over for their order.

Emma ordered a coffee and a slice of pie, but Elliot started to feel ill at the sound of food. He didn’t order anything.

“So, what is it that you were going to tell me?” Elliot asked.

Emma shifted her position in her seat, looked at her thumbs, and shifted her position. “I think you’ve com—” She was interrupted by the waiter coming with her food.

Emma seemed much relieved at the break, and immediately started munching on her food. Elliot stared at her eating her food, and every time he saw a piece of apple pie go into her mouth, he felt more and more nauseous. He closed his eyes, and excused himself to the bathroom.

He stumbled into the bathroom, staggering, feeling dizzy. He opened the door to one of the stalls, and he got on his knees, feeling like he was going to throw up. He closed his eyes again, and tried to control his stomach. He still felt dizzy but not so nauseous, and he got back on his feet. He opened his eyes, and walked to the sink to wash his face. He turned on the faucet, and looked at himself in the mirror. Man, I look like hell, he thought.

He glanced down at the water, and opened his eyes, horrified. There wasn’t water coming out of the faucet, it was blood.

He quickly turned on all the faucets, and they all had the same thing coming out of them…blood.

He stumbled back into a stall, and bumped into the toilet. He looked down at the toilet, and saw blood in there as well.

He flew out of the stall, and started to feel dizzy and nauseous once more. He looked at himself in the mirror, and at first glance he thought he was melting. But when he looked at himself closer, he saw that blood was leaking out of his pores.

He fell to his knees, and could fell bile rising in his throat. He couldn’t hold it back and threw up on the floor.

His last thought before he blacked was his face flying to his own throw up…blood.

 

Elliot awoke in the same bed that he had when he had blacked out on the ground of Coruscant. He shifted his head and saw Emma, her head facing down, and a line of drool flowing down onto her pants.

Elliot first reaction was that she was head, but then he saw that she was breathing in and out deeply. She had fallen asleep watching him.

“Emma,” he croaked, his throat horribly dry. “Emma, wake up.” She continued to sleep. “Emma!” he said, as loud as he could—which was hardly above normal speaking levels, as he felt terribly weak—and she awoke with a start. She blinked several times, trying to clear the fuzziness, and looked at Elliot.

“You’re awake,” she said, smilingly slightly.

“I don’t want any bull**** this time. What the hell is wrong with me?”

Her face grew dark, as did her voice when she spoke. “I don’t know how to make this any easier for you, so I’ll just say it outright. You’re a Vampyre.”

[The_Catto]

OK, now that WAS a different chapter. And you've made my liking to the story even more better ... I LOVE VAMPIRES!!!! hahaha, great twist, its got me wondering whats he going to do.

 

All up, a very, very very great addition to the story :D:D

[Jae Onasi]

You know, it never occured to me that there'd be vampires in the SW universe, but have fun with it.

I caught some grammar things, no big deal.

 

It'll be interesting to see where you take this story next.

[JediKnight707]

You know, it never occured to me that there'd be vampires in the SW universe, but have fun with it.

I caught some grammar things, no big deal.

 

It'll be interesting to see where you take this story next.

 

There probably aren't, but you said you created tests for a more futuristic feel; I created a new species! Hehe! Plus, I always wanted a story with vampires

I'm hoping that this story turns out the way I want it, but stories tend to have a mind of there own...maybe that'll be a good idea for a story...

[HK-42]

yes very different humm but passes as a VERY good CHAPTER

[JediKnight707]

You guys think it was bloody enough at the end? I don't. I'm probably not going to post another chapter for about two weeks. At least. School has been keeping me terribly busy, and I've only been going to high school for like 3 days. But, my schedule has been...unpredictable, so I never know when I'll get a few hours. So, for all I know, the next chapter could come tomorrow, but in all reality, it will probably come in about 2-3 weeks

[Diego Varen]

Lucky for me, because I don't start School again, until the 6th September. I'll start my second year in High School. Anyway, down to business. Good Chapter and one of your longest.

 

@ Jae Onasi: I believe I saw somewhere that there is such a thing as a Force Vampire. There was a Thread where someone asked if Nihilus was one.

 

Looking foward to more Chapters Jedi_Knight.

[Maverick5770]

ITs interesting, I like it though. Keep it up.

[RC-1162]

awesome, JK! it sucks bad that obi died, tho

[JediKnight707]

Guys, I know that you're going to hate me, but I just now started writing the next chapter! Ahhhh! I'm not sure when it'll be up 'cause I never like to set deadlines for myself (though, I always seem to) and becuase, I have no idea! I was suffering a case of writer's block, but finally pushed through it