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Darth Homer

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**Begin game**

*Darth Homer steps out into a clearing.

 

As he looks around he sees various enemies surrounding him, wepons in hand.

 

Homer ignites his double-bladed lightsaber and takes a step forward.

 

He immediatly trips and slices himself in half.

 

His last words echo across the planet: D'OH!!*

 

**End Game**

 

I figured I'd anger too many people if I posted this in the RPG forums, so it'll go here...just something rather silly I decided to do for the fun of it and to see what the reactions might be.

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Hearing Darth Homer's shreeks of pain echoing across the grassy plain, Rhett leaps from the warmth of his wife's loving arms, grabs his dueling gloves and sabers then runs out to his trusty speeder.

 

Soaring across the green fields as the sun creeps up from behind the hills, using his force seeing, he spies several groups of tuskens roaming a little to close to the badland outskirts. He knows that this must be were Homer met his untimely demise.

 

Moving in for a closer look, Rhett activates his vehicles Nubian LR-25 cloaking device and bends his thoughts on the mind of his fallen camrade. Trying to read the last thoughts that coursed through his friends brain at the very last. In hopes that it might give him some more information as to what challenges he may or may not be facing in the very near future.....

 

If only he knew that the mighty Homer was not struck down by the overpowering force of the rogue Tuskens but by his own Jar-Jar-esqe clumsyness with his saber he wouldn't be heading into the worst three days of his life.

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Nearby, Clefo, who had just purchased a Rail Detonator and wanted to try it out sometime, was about 50 meters from Homer's death site, and was busy firing shots up into the air.

 

He move 50 meters towards Rhett and sees the speeder. Thinking its abandonned he fires a Z key shot and it latches on to Rhett's speeder. 3 seconds later, the charge, along with the speeder, explode.. Clefo runs from the scene doing a Daffy-Duck esque "Wohoo!" routine

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What's with everyone trying to kill me? :eek:;)

 

 

 

Sensing the oncoming detonator, Rhett jumps from his speeder and does a duck-and-cover roll, safely rolling to a stop at the bottom of a dune.

 

Being only about 200 meters away from Homer, Rhett makes a mad dash to the site of the incident while simultaniously force grapping Clefo's insubordinate groin and throwing a rock at crazy_dog.

 

Coming to the scene, he finds that Clefo had been killed by his own saber. "How could this be", Rhett thought, "a band of tuskens couldn't have taken an armed Jedi let alone taken his weapon and killed him with it". Rhett knew there was something sinister afoot. Something whos roots reach deep into the planets underworld. Rhett makes a proper burial mound for the once great Jedi Homer, then heads back to his home to inform his wife of the events that are unfolding and to get supplies for his journey to the Tusken hideouts.

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has mod of the rpg forum i can tell you for sure that i would not be mad if you posted this there...

 

 

We have had games like that before....

 

all we ask is that if you are not in one of the other games (ones with gm's) that you just don't post in thouse threads :)

 

I know return you to your game...

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CD no. 3 wakes up after bieng knocked unconcies by Rhett's stone, and gets his portable turbolaser. Then, Crazy Dog hurries to Rhett's house to kidnap his loving wife, Jeri Ryan.

 

 

2 hours later...

 

 

Crazy Dog is holding Rhett's wife hostage for $50,000. What's more, she is being held in a high security scyscraper owned by Crazy Dog which he bought of the flea market.

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The ghost of Darth Homer approaches Drake.

 

Nicly done, but the power to blow up a buidling is insignificant next to the power of the farce....D'OH!! I mean FORCE!!

 

Then the ghost of Qui-Gon Jinn walks up to Homer and says:

 

Only the lightside can come back as ghosts, what are you doing?

 

A giant flushing sound is heard as Homer starts to twirl. Homer slowly gets sucked into an invisible hole and vanishes from sight

 

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!

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Artoo sees Jeri Ryan just lying there thrown from the building when a thought crosses his mind

 

Do I have enough weapons to hold off both drake and crazy dog?

 

Artoo sees Jeri lying there and before you can say schnellfreezenhoozen he drags her to his secret underground lair. That'll teach Rhett not to do......... something.... or.... other.

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Guest Supreme Warlord

I run to save crazy dog. I am right under him. I look up and see the sun and it blinds me. I scream and moved a inch. I heard a thud and Crazy_Dog was a mess...

 

Supreme:Sorry!!!! man crap!

 

I pull my trusty blaster and shoot at Captain_Drake for killing Crazy Dog. I activate my personal shield. While shooting at my nemsis. I called my Death Star which was Supreme Weapon to fire on the planet. It fired and missed.

 

Supreme: STUPID MEN!!!! YOU CANT SHOOT IF YOUR LIFE DEPENDED ON IT YOUR STUPID WORTHLESS WASTE OF SPACE!!!!

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Guest Supreme Warlord

:eek: MY HAIR!!!! :mad: NOW YOU ASK FOR IT!!! I hate when people goes after my hair!!!!

 

*pulls out my double-blade saber and activates both blades.*

 

*quickly press a button that summons troops*

 

*ten legions of troops appear behind me with their guns trained on Captain Drake*

 

Supreme: Oh I forgot to tell you...I dont fight fair...FIRE MEN!!!!!!

 

*troops fires at Captain Drake*

 

*the trooper behind me shot at my hair taking out the last patch.*

 

*I turn around and look at him*

 

Supreme: YOU IDIOT!!!! WHY DID YOU SHOOT AT YOUR SUPERIOR OFFICER!!!*slaps the trooper face. Fogot he had an helmet and screams*

 

Trooper: Sir, that patch of hair was distracting so I did you a favor SIR!

 

Supreme: Oh really...WELL....AAHHH!!!*cuts the trooper in half with my saber*

 

Trooper: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

*Supreme laughing madly and gestures for the AT ATs and AT STs and AT PTs to fire at Captain Drake*

 

*hears an explosion and a scream*(havoc)

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As a not-so-innocent bystander, Havoc sees his oppurtunity to be a hero and stop the conflict between Drake and Warlord. Always one for thoroughness, Havoc decides a thermal detonator would be the best course of action. He reaches into his pack feels around for a second, finds the weapon and lobs it towards the batteling foes before him.

 

Only after seeing an orange tumbling through the air and bouncing off Drake's head does Havoc realize he had reached into his lunch sack and not his weapons pack. Havoc then proceeds to think to himself, "I thought I told my wife, I hate oranges!".

 

All the while the Actual Thermal Detonator had fallen out of Havoc's pack and dropped at his feet, accidentally arming itself. Lost in thought, Havoc does not hear the ominous beeping of the explosive's timer...

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Darth Homer's Ghost appears again and jumps on the detonator

 

...BEEP...BEEP...BEEEP...

 

Homer the realizes that he's a ghost and can't stop the explosion. He then tries to talk to Havoc

 

Hey, you dropped your detonator. HEY!!

 

Homer then thinks that he didn't have a Master/Apprentice relationship w/ Havoc so communication would be difficult

 

HAAAAAVOOOOOOC!!!!! YOU'RE DETONATOR IS BEEPING!!!!

 

All Havoc hears is a distant buzzing. Just then a hole opens up under Homer.

 

Not again....AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

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As Havoc is thinking to himself, he starts to hear a faint buzzing sound and a gut feeling like someone is trying to talk to him, but then as quickly as it began, it stopped as if a giant hole had opened up and swallowed the voice. "

 

Oh well", thought Havoc,"I should probably get back to work anyways". No sooner had Havoc rounded the corner, the thermal detonator went off with a thunderous boom, leaving a large crater in the sidewalk and stunning onlookers.

 

"that's it!", Yelled Havoc, "I told her it was cherries I hated! Silly me!" *smacks his forehead* "Sometimes I can be SOoo silly!"

 

And so Havoc lives yet again... amazingly...

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Homer claws his way out of the hole once more.

 

Whew! That was tough. Whoa, Salculd, you scared me! You know I don't like the lightning eyes thing. Salculd? D'OH!! I'm dead...geez, you'd think I'd remember that.

 

A large black hole opens up under Homer

 

Please get some originality!

 

Homer turns on Force Speed and shoots out of there.

 

The hole follows...

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As Havoc is making his way towards work he is approached by a young boy who seems strangely intent on looking behind Havoc.

 

Havoc asks the young boy, "what do you see?"

 

the boy replied, " A strange man running from a hole"

 

Havoc turns and doesn't see the man nor the hole, "I don't see anything, kid."

 

The young kid motions for Havoc to come closer, "That's because he's a ghost."

 

Havoc rolls his eyes, "Sure kid, and I'm Emperor Palpatine!"

 

The boy motions for Havoc to come even closer and whispers in Havoc's ear, "I have a secret... I see dumb people...

 

*off camera* CUT!!!

 

Kid read the script, it doesn't say dumb people! Try it again...

 

*Back to havoc and kid*

 

The boy motions for Havoc to come even closer and whispers in Havoc's ear, "I have a secret... I see dead people" And then the kid reaches out and grabs Havoc unexpectedly, and suddenly Havoc has the strangest feeling...

 

The young boy runs down the street and disappears into the crowd, leaving a stunned Havoc who suddenly realizes he sees Darth Homer running from what appears to be a giant hole in the ground!...

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