Guest Imladil Posted March 30, 2002 Share Posted March 30, 2002 The federal government is tricky, tricky indeed! I have just figured out how they keep tabs on how stupid the population is. For reasons of interior adjustment and making the local standard of living suitable for the people on a regional basis, they can't rely on data like school, SAT or IQ test scores. Those tests only reflect the capacities of school children, college applicants or Mensa applicants...but not, say, Billy Jack who works down at Taco Bell and watches Gilligan's Island on his momma's teevee. To gauge this man's intelligence, and count how many of them might be living in a given neighborhood, the government needs to have a simple, centrally located IQ test interface device on every street corner that a broad range of the populace would use on a regular basis. Well...they do. Crosswalk buttons. The little walk/don't walk pedestrian button at every stoplight with a crosswalk only needs to be pushed ONCE for the traffic computer to realize that there is someone there who wants to cross the street. Nevertheless, Billy Jack and his kinfolk repeatedly smack the button a dozen or more times, thinking either that the computer will take their impatience into account and turn the light green, or that the button must not have worked the first eleven times. Instant IQ test, delivered to the populace on a daily basis--without their having the slightest clue! Conveniently, the whole thing is already computerized, and in this day and age that information can be collected and updated hourly by a CIA mainframe. So: I say smack the button! Make them think we're all dumb as mutant rats, and then when they come to put us all behind fences...we can surprise them. Vive la resistance! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue15 Posted March 30, 2002 Share Posted March 30, 2002 you could say the same thing about the payphones and soda machines that randomly steal your money, they want to see how many people kick/punch that soda machine, and how many times a person presses the coin release lever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lynk Former Posted March 31, 2002 Share Posted March 31, 2002 *nods at R15* You're right... at my school there's this vending machine that sells packets of chips... well it's all fine, no loss of money, but the damn things hole thingy where the chips fall in is too small to get em out... i've seen many try to get a single packet of chips from that vending machine only to see it blow up in their face... the damn designers didn't think of the air inside the stupid chip packets before designing the vending machine... idiots Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grand_Admiral_Ice Posted April 1, 2002 Share Posted April 1, 2002 Allt those people have to do is open the bag and poof, the bag exploding problem is gone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted April 1, 2002 Share Posted April 1, 2002 Zoomie's been in the pipeweed again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue-for-Higher Posted April 1, 2002 Share Posted April 1, 2002 Its true. Also the NSA moniters all your phone calls and E-mails etc. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Imladil Posted April 2, 2002 Share Posted April 2, 2002 (Note to alien browsers: Zoomie is me, and Imladil is Zoomie.) Pipe-weed? I dunno about that, but there are many species of glow-in-the dark mushrooms deep in the eleven forest, with magical properties... The bit about the NSA monitoring all electronic dataflow is true. I forget the name of the program--I *think* it's called 'Echelon'--but it essentially scans text for key words and phrases , then flags them for human review, to see if terrorists or criminals might be invloved. This is why I sprinkle mt prose liberally with outbursts like 'Rat Bastards,' 'Suitcase Bomb' or even the ever-popular 'Glory be to Allah.' That way, NSA agents are forced to read through pages of crazed gibberish instead of properly spying on an innocent public. 'Vive la resistance!' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wraith 8 Posted April 2, 2002 Share Posted April 2, 2002 a friend and me wanted to try that.... make an e-mail and put a lot of words in like Saddam Hoesein and Bin Laden and The US and President Bush... and look how fast they react Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue-for-Higher Posted April 2, 2002 Share Posted April 2, 2002 Originally posted by Imladil The bit about the NSA monitoring all electronic dataflow is true. I forget the name of the program--I *think* it's called 'Echelon'--but it essentially scans text for key words and phrases , then flags them for human review, to see if terrorists or criminals might be invloved. It is called Echelon. Go to abovetopsecret.com to find out more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyle d'Tana Posted April 2, 2002 Share Posted April 2, 2002 Its really interesting to see, what the national security agencis can find out, over the internet!!! Example: has any1 seen Enemy of the state?????????? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Imladil Posted April 3, 2002 Share Posted April 3, 2002 It's amazing what teenage kids in their basement can find out about you over the internet...! Ah. It's a new day. Time to wake up Agent Echelon. *(Yells)* Down with Babylon! Great Satan! Plutonium! Hello, Agent Echelon. How are you today? Is the coffee good? You seem to have a spot on your tie there... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wraith 8 Posted April 3, 2002 Share Posted April 3, 2002 well.... im sure your right and all.... but what are you gonna do about it???? i mean... worrying about it doesnt help... o why think about it..... i dont realy care.... so i dont thinkn about people who are watching me.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kyle d'Tana Posted April 3, 2002 Share Posted April 3, 2002 Well, wraith, thats what I think, too. I haven't the know-how for saving me, strike back or something like that. I couldn't do anything against this people, so i don't care about it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redwing Posted April 5, 2002 Share Posted April 5, 2002 Sorry...there's no way they can get the manpower for human review on everything on the Internet...so it's just slightly useless :p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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