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You Might Be A Engineer If.....


Boba Rhett

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. . . you have no life and can prove it mathematically.

 

. . . you enjoy pain.

 

. . . you know vector calculus but you can’t remember how to do long division.

 

. . . you’ve actually ever used every single function on your graphing calculator.

 

. . . when you look in the mirror, you see an engineering major.

 

. . . it is sunny and 70 degrees outside, and you are working on a computer.

 

. . . you frequently whistle the theme song to “MacGyver.”

 

. . . you know how to integrate a chicken and can take the derivative of water.

 

. . . you hesitate to look at something because you don’t want to break down its wave function.

 

. . . you have a pet named after a scientist.

 

. . . you laugh at jokes about mathematicians.

 

. . . you can translate English into Binary.

 

. . . you are completely addicted to caffeine.

 

. . . you’ll assume that a “horse” is a “sphere” in order to make the math easier.

 

. . . you understood more than five of these indicators.

 

. . . you make a hard copy of this list and post it on your office door.

 

. . . you know the glass is neither half full nor half empty; it's simply twice as big as it needs to be.

 

. . . you have ever taken the back off your TV just to see what's inside

 

. . . you own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts

 

. . . you are aware that computers are actually only good for playing games, but are afraid to say it out loud

 

. . . you have ever saved the power cord from a broken appliance

 

. . . you have ever purchased an electronic appliance "as-is"

 

. . . the salespeople at Circuit City can't answer any of your questions

 

. . . you have introduced your kids by the wrong name

 

. . . you have a habit of destroying things in order to see how they work

 

. . . you can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting

 

. . . you thought the real heroes of "Apollo 13" were the mission controllers "They were, dammit!" :D

 

. . . while in college you thought Spring Break was metal fatigue failure

 

_________________________________________

 

 

*gets off of floor and wipes tears away from eyes*

 

They aren't joking about most of those things, guys. Those indicators are basically spot on. :D

 

 

If you think of any more, feel free to add them!

 

 

I'll leave you with one final joke,

 

Q: What do engineers use for birth control?

A: Their personalities. :D

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I fit a couple, and understand a few more, but I've nothing to do with more of the advanced ones (like Calculus, though I am teaching it to myself in my spare time at work *ACK*). I have had a couple ferrets named after moons of Jupiter... maybe I'm an astronomer...

 

Kryllith

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