Jump to content

Home

funneyest movie lines


whitedragon

Recommended Posts

Grosse Pointe Blank

 

Marty: Debi's house.

Paul: Kinda crept up on you, didn't it?

Marty: No, you drove us here.

Paul: [pause] Yep.

 

The whole nine yards

 

The meat's fine, the lettuce is fine, but if you bring me another hamburger with mayonnaise on it, I'll cut off your legs, set fire to your house and then watch you try to crawl out of your burning house with bloody stumps.

 

Airplane

 

Rumack: You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.

Elaine Dickinson: A hospital? What is it?

Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

 

Rex Kramer: Striker, listen, and you listen close: flying a plane is no different than riding a bicycle, just a lot harder to put baseball cards in the spokes.

 

Elaine Dickinson: There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?

 

Evolution

 

Harry Block: No, not the leg. Ira, don't let them take my leg.

Nurse Tate: Doctor! It's moving.

Dr. Paulson: It's headed for the testicles.

Harry Block: Take the leg! Please take the leg!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

America's Sweethearts

 

Interviewer: So you're looking comfortable

Eddie: I'm going to be truthful with you. I just took a half a pound of Vicodin, so I'm going to be feeling pretty comfortable until March.

 

Meet the parents

 

Greg Focker: You can milk just about anything with nipples.

Jack Byrnes: I have nipples, Greg, could you milk me?

 

Hot Shots

 

Topper Harley: Playing to lose is like sleeping with your sister. Sure she's a great piece of tail with a blouse full of goodies, but it's just illegal. Then you get into that whole inbred thing. Kids with no teeth who do nothing but play the banjo... eat apple sauce through a straw... pork farm animals.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Kylilin

Happy Gilmore:

 

"I eat pieces of **** like you for breakfast."

"You eat pieces of **** for breakfast?"

*pause*

"No!"

 

 

 

lmao, I luv that part. There are thousands of great lines in Austin Powers Movies...

 

rrriight. I think i'm just gonna go watch a mmmmmovie.

 

ey doctor... how was space?

space was cool.

 

and then in goldmember it cracks me up when they are singing hard knock life, and hes like dominos and then the rest is just cut out.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

major payne

 

drug dealer: you had better give up seniour you cannot kill us all.

*payne takes gun out and shoves it up drug dealers ass*

payne:no but i can clean you collon out faster that one of those baritos with extra guacamoli sause.

 

LOTR

 

pippen:whats that?

mary:this my friend is a pint.

pippen:it comes in pints...im getting one.

 

leathal wepon 4

 

uncle benny:have something to eat, ill give you a police discount

riggs: fly lice

uncle benny: fly lice? it is fried rice you plick

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Kylilin

Happy Gilmore:

 

"I eat pieces of **** like you for breakfast."

"You eat pieces of **** for breakfast?"

*pause*

"No!"

 

Kylilin!

 

*run tackle hug*

 

Hows it goin, you ol' freak? :)

 

 

Fuuny quote:

 

Blazing Saddles

 

"Badges? We don't need no stinking badges!"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Independance Day

Will Smith (char name?): You did NOT just shoot that green **** at ME!

 

Space Balls

Helmet: I see your schwartz is as big as mine!

 

Monkies: What is it coming out of it's nose?

Monkies 2: It looks like Space Balls!

Monkies: Well ****, there goes the planet!

 

Star Trek TVH

Kirk: Well, Double Dumb Ass on you!

 

MIIB

Agent J: Just about everyone who works in a postal office is an alien.

 

Kay: Does that come standard?

Jay: It came with a black dude but he kept getting pulled over

 

All Star Wars movies

"I have a bad feeling about this" BLEH!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Army of Darkness-----------------------------------

 

Ash: Your leaving but two things... Jack and Sh*t... and Jack left town

Ash: Hail to the King, baby

Ash: Gimmie some sugar, baby

Ash: This......................is my BOOM stick!

Ash: The names Ash...*loading shotgun*...housewares.

 

Up in Smoke-----------------------------------------

 

Man: Do you know who this is?!

Cheech: No, who is this is?

 

Cop: Liscence please.

Cheech: It's on the bumper maaaan! *Laughs histericly*

 

ANH---------------------------------------------------

 

C3po: Nobody complains when a droid wins

Han Solo: That's because droids don't pull peoples arms off after they lose. Wookies are known to do that.

Chewbacca: Grrrrraaaaawwwrrrlll

C3po: New tactic, let the wookie win

 

Space Balls-------------------------------------------

Dark Helmet: What's a matter Col. Sanders, chicken?!

Dark Helmet: She's gone from suck to blow....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

FULL METAL JACKET

 

That Ermy guy is the best!!

 

"How tall are you soldier? I didnt know they stack **** that high!"

"Do you suck Dicks?!"

"Here strangle yourself! Dont touch me FAGGOT! Put your neck in my hand!"

"Where you from faggot?! Texas! Only Steers and Queers come from Texas, and you dont look like a Steer so that about narrows it down" (something like that)

 

Oh ya now Ermy has his own show on the History Channel

MAIL CALL!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Commando:

 

-Don't disturb my friend, he's dead tired.

-says to garbage men (hitmen in disguise): 'I thought you were going to miss me', 'don't worry, we won't' [insert shooting sounds here].

-I eat green berets for breakfast, and I'm very hungry.

-I let him go

-Stick around (not sure if right movie here)

-Let off some steam Bennat

 

Predator:

 

-I dont have time to bleed.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Gummo.nz

 

Predator:

 

-I dont have time to bleed.

 

That's Gov. Jesse "the body" Ventura of Minn.

 

 

 

 

 

OMG. I love the cheesy one-liners Arnie Schwartenfeffer has.

 

Don't forget...

 

 

 

Tue Lies-

 

*Terrorist is attatched to a rocket*

 

Arnie: You're fired!

 

 

 

Kindergarden Cop-

 

Arnie: It's not a tumor!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...