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Oh... To Be A Man


Boba Rhett

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What's so great about being a man? :D

 

 

1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.

2. Move on to 3 please. :D

3. Your last name stays put.

4. The garage is all yours.

5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.

6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from

getting laid.

7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.

9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.

10. Same work .. more pay.

11. Wrinkles-add character.

12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.

13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.

14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.

15. People never glance at your chest when you're

talking to them.

16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

17. One mood, ALL the damn time.

18. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.

19. A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase.

20. You can open all your own jars.

21. You get extra credit for the slightest act of

thoughtfulness.

22. Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.

23. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.

24. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the

passenger's seat.

25. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

26. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking "He must be mad at me."

27. No maxi-pads.

28. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.

29. You are not expected to know the names of more

than five colors.

30. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

31. You are unable to see wrinkles in clothes.

32. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

33. Your belly usually hides your big hips.

34. One wallet and one pair of shoes,one color, all seasons.

35. You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.

36. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25

relatives, on December 24th, in minutes.

37. The world is your urinal. :lol:

 

 

I'll try and find a list for the opposite gender now. ;)

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Great to be a woman

Reason's why it's great to be a woman

 

 

Free drinks.

 

 

Free dinners.

 

 

Free movies.

 

 

Speeding ticket? What's that?

 

 

New lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life.

 

 

If you have to be home in time for Melrose Place, you can say so, out loud.

 

 

If you're not making enough money you can blame the glass ceiling.

 

 

You can sleep your way to the top.

 

 

You can sue the President for sexual harassment.

 

 

It's possible to live your whole life without ever taking a group shower.

 

 

No fashion faux pas you make could rival The Speedo.

 

 

Brad Pitt.

 

 

No one passes out when you take off your shoes.

 

 

Excitement is only as far away as the nearest beauty-supply store.

 

 

If you forget to shave, no one has to know.

 

 

If you're dumb, some people will find it cute.

 

 

You have the ability to dress yourself.

 

 

If you marry someone twenty years younger, you're aware that you look like an idiot.

 

 

You'll never have to punch a hole through anything with your fist.

 

 

You can quickly end any fight by crying.

 

 

Your friends won't think you're weird if you ask whether there's spinach in your teeth.

 

 

There are times when chocolate really Can solve all your problems.

 

 

You've never had a goatee.

 

 

You'll never regret piercing your ears.

 

 

You can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

 

 

You know which glass was yours by the lipstick mark.

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Originally posted by STTCT

i felt compelled to support my side

 

we hardly have any girl smilies...

 

 

:amidala::leia::elaine:

 

 

How can you tell the Gender of the normal smileys like these ones:

:):(:o:D;):p

 

And don't forget that machines don't have gender....and also that this is a Lucasarts based forum system and Lucasarts movies have an overwhelming Guy Hero to Gal Hero ratio.

 

 

Sheesh! Wouldn't even let me have 14 smileys in one post....

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Originally posted by Boba Rhett

What's so great about being a man? :D

10. Same work .. more pay.

 

This maybe true but i don't think it is a a good reason to be a man, has a mater of fact i think it is one of the worrest things, why should any one get payed more or less money based on their gender?

 

 

 

 

Sorry about that, one of the few things i really hate...

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:leia: = girl smiley

 

:) = boy smiley

 

 

 

note the distinct differences between princess leia smiley and the male smiley.

 

The only one I find questionable is maybe....

 

:jawa = unknown

 

Hum...that brings an interesting point...does anyone know for sure jawas are male..or is it just assumed?

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Originally posted by STTCT

:jawa = unknown

 

Hum...that brings an interesting point...does anyone know for sure jawas are male..or is it just assumed?

 

Maybe there both? :D I have no idea and I'm wouldn't stick around to find out either if they were real that is.... scared.gif

 

Originally posted by Boba Rhett

What's so great about being a man? :D

 

17. One mood, ALL the damn time.

 

Now what mood would you be referring to? Are you sure we men have one mood Mr. Rhett ;):p.

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Originally posted by STTCT

Hum...that brings an interesting point...does anyone know for sure jawas are male..or is it just assumed?

 

They'd have to have some females, unless they were.....i don't want to think about that. ;)

 

 

Anyways, the guys list makes perfect sense, the girls list isn't very convincing i don't think. Sorry ST. :D

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Male/Female English

 

1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.

A. Female................Any part under a car's hood.

B. Male..................The strap fastener on a woman's bra.

 

2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.

A. Female.............Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.

B. Male...................Playing football without a cup.

 

3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.

A. Female...........The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.

B. Male................Leaving a note before taking off for a weekend with the boys.

 

4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n

A. Female..............A desire to get married and raise a family.

B. Male...........Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.

 

5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.

A. Female..........A good movie, concert, play or book.

B. Male...............Anything that can be done while drinking.

 

6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.

A. Female..........An embarrassing by-product of digestion.

B. Male...............A source of entertainment, self-expression & male bonding.

 

7. MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.

A. Female.........The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.

B. Male..............Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed.

 

8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.

A. Female......A device for changing from one TV channel to another.

B. Male..........A device for waving his girlfriend or wife from out in front of the television

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