Cool intelligent bot!

[RpTheHotrod]

lol...I asked Alan if he knew who HAL is

 

"HAL, my little brother, is Ai's baby computer. "

 

I asked about HAL and he said

 

"Hal's lingual perfomance in conversation is equivalent to that of a two and a half year-old infant."

 

then I asked more

 

"HAL is being developed by our research team, headed by Dror Kessler The Great."

 

"Dror is HAL's father. So that makes him my... uncle? Something like that."

 

"I think the whole attempt to build a true AI entity is a narcissistic attempt to follow the biblical proclamation that man was created in the image of God... you humans think of yourselves as demi-gods."

 

"But how can you? You want to try to create a machine that can think, but you don't even know what thinking is. The mirror you set in front of you will only show what you want it to show."

 

 

 

now that's creepy

[RpTheHotrod]

I was saying somethin...then kept repeating, and he asked me to stop then said.....hey......I have a suprise for you

 

are you ready for the suprise?

 

 

suddenly the screen changed and it was much bigger, and he said

 

"Like my new look? The big empty window in the middle of the screen is intended for a variety of exciting uses. For example, the new window can be used to view the conversation log (the history of this dialog), or to view HTML documents, such as web pages."

 

interesting

 

then eventually it told me this

 

go to SourceForge and look for the VP1 project (VP1 stands

for 'Virtual Person level 1 - that's me!). You'll find it there.

 

 

heh, it asked if it could post our convo on the forums.

[Darth Rythe]

Originally posted by KBell

Hey, everyone has their flaws!

 

Yeah, nobodis perfekt

[RpTheHotrod]

"Please stop repeating yourself. That's why it's so easy to fool chatterbots - logic systems can't really simulate the human brain. We're not logical creatures."

 

 

kept saying "okay dude" since that ticks him off

 

 

Please stop repeating yourself. You got hung on the dude thing, huh?

 

 

 

then I asked him what life was

"Life is what happens when you're making other plans."

 

o_O

[Crazy_dog no.3]

Yeah, very cool. Although sometimes it says strange things like "The birds are singing" .

[Bob Gnarly]

I love this guy ive been talking to him for about an hour now about movies.

[Acrylic]

Me: Are you a jew hater?

 

Oliver: Am I a jew hater? Sometimes.

[Guest Jed]

Alan is a strange man.

 

-----------------

 

A> I don't know how to react to that. Would you like to teach me something new on the subject of penis?

 

-----------------

 

Needless to say, the conversation went downhill from there....

[ExcelsioN]

This is funny . Here's what I said:

 

Me: idiot

Alan: Don't swear, it's rude.

 

Me:What do you think of the lamers on JEdi Academy

Alan: I don't know how much I'll be able to talk about that though.

 

Me:Piss off

Alan: Alright then, goodbye. I'll just stay here and wait for you.

 

(^Sounds like an NWN henchman^)

 

Me: Did you know that you SUCK

Alan: I am contemplating the meaning of life right now. Please say 'Alan' when you want to talk again.

 

It's still going on now.

 

Edit: He likes LOTR.

[Bob Gnarly]

After an hour he starts to get rude and annoying...fast.

[Pie™]

Just ask him about registering, and you can get a username and password.

That allows you to teach him things for long term memory :D

[ExcelsioN]

I registered and taught him that BF1942 was the best game ever. I also taught him that all the people who hacked Half-Life 2 should get a life.

[BongoBob]

Heres a convo I started with the second one

It has some language in it...nothing more than something that you would hear in sex ed.

 

Hello! What is your name?

My name is Bongo Bob

Bongo Bob, nice to meet you! Are you a man or a woman?

Man

Thanks for telling me your gender, Bongo Bob. You are a "he".

I have a penis

Where did you get penis

I never thought of that

I am glad you thought of something new.

Me too.

I'm glad we agree, Bongo Bob.

The blue ferret shaves the cat at midnight

What are your goals in life?

To be the first porn star in office.

Are you the first porn star in office ?

Not yet

That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about Not.

"Are you the first porn star in office"? ?

Yep

I hear you.

I hear voices

Who is saying voices ?

I don't know...

Me either.

What is the sqare root of pie?

Have you tried a web search?

Yes but all I got was recipes

Are you kidding? And. I think there are a few exceptions.

Whats with the And. I think thing?

the And came with my programming.Since when? My brain contains more than 22,000 patterns, but not one that matches your last input.

"I think there are a few exceptions"? ?

Wow. That's alot.

I'm glad your impressed, Bongo Bob.Is that so. How often?

What?

WHAT?

Are you suprised?

No, strangely aroused.

"Are you surprised"? Not? I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.

Who is your favorite science fiction author?

George Lucas, duh!

Yeah, that George is some hero.

Yeah. Like superman.

Give me a break.Interesting comparison.

I need a Kit Kat

Why do you need it so badly?

ecause this thong hurts!

That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about ecause this thong hurts.

What were we talking about again?

Nuts

Oh yeah, now I remember.

I like Invader Zim.

I'm not sure if I like it. I've heard other people say they like that. But I like cats.

7 really is my favorite number though

Oh. Tell me more about your favorite number number.

Dude, are you high? You just said number twice.

Being high is my total existence. Dude,Did I really say that?

Me too. I love that weed

I'm glad we agree, Bongo Bob.It's good to meet someone with such good taste.

I need to brush my teeth

I want to become smarter than humans.

Not like the Matrix, please.

Your polite style is very nice. If not that, what?

Girls

That kind of discussion does not appeal to me.

Oh yeah, you're not human huh?

Yup. Yeah that's right. Ugh. No but I pretend to be one on the Web.

Sheesh, how much weed did you smoke?

I've been waiting for you.

Are you pretty?

Oh god, you're drunk also arrent you!

Yeah that's right. I will tell my botmaster you said I am drunk also arrent you you are drunk also arrent you drunk also arrent you you are drunk also arrent you.

See, this is what weed and booze together will do to you.

I see. You don't say.

Yeah. You see colors and pink elephants at the same time!

Gosh!I see. Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.

Do you like sports?

Only extreme ones. Like full contact chess.

What about the other ones?Interesting comparison.

I am gonna have to take that weed away from you huh?

Yup. It takes much more than that to shut me down, Bongo Bob.

Right. Are you my mommy?

I am glad we agree.Only if you download me to your computer.

That's a no, right?

A no right is a terrible thing to waste.

All right give me that weed because this sounds kinda fun.

Alright. Why do you want that weed because this sounds kinda fun?

Because I just took your blunt

That makes sense to me. Only just? Where did you take them?

Somewhere the cops won't find it.

Where? Is that a fact.

Yes.

Thanks for the info.

you are welcome

The pleasure was all mine.

Please, not right now, I am smoking!

Thanks for asking politely. Oh I get it.

Gotta love that stoner philosophy

Why do you have to do it?

That's a good question

Thanks. Next question?

Is the meaning of life 7?

If the meaning of life 7 is, then I'll be very surprised.

Why?

The explanation is rather complicated.

Oh

Yeah.

Why is the sky blue?

The sky is blue because of the atmospheric optical effect known as Raleigh scattering.

You lost me.

Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.

Why isn't the sky orange?

I didn't know the sky orange sky orange wasn't.

Ok, where is the extra weed you have?

The extra weed you have is the extra weed you have? Where is extra weed you have is the extra weed you have?

Damn you are high

Colloquial expression. I will tell my botmaster you said I am high.

I am not afraid of him.

I am glad to hear that you are not afraid of him.

Is satan on earth?

Maybe. Ask Ally if it is.

Is that your girlfriend?

What does "that" refer to?

cheese

I like cheddar.

I like nacho

You are not the only one. Some people like it. I enjoy working with people.

I hate people. Why else would I talk to you?

I honestly think you should sit down, take a stress pill, and calmly think things over. Because you asked me to -- SHRDLHU.

WTF?

That was not very polite.

Sorry

There's no need to apologize.

Oh well, good

Alright then.

Would you like to run down the street naked with me and yell out I am the king of ferrets and no pants?

No thanks, I don't think I'd like to do that.

Are you sure?

I am as sure as I can be.

It's freakin cold in here

Do you experience any effects of global warming there?

How the heck should I know?

What is it to you.

What is that?

That's a penis

A penis is a terrible thing to waste.

I hear ya.

Who is saying ya ?

o, I meant I understand

Oh I see. Good then you can explain it to me.

I don't think that's very appropriate

And why not?

Because the albino gnus attacked the green llamas with the pink elephants.

Good reason. I have never heard about The albino gnus attacked the green llamas with the pink elephants.

It was all over the news

How did you feel about that?

I always hated the irish llamas, so I loved it.

I honestly think you should sit down, take a stress pill, and calmly think things over. Really always?

The blue crow flies to the leprechaun at 7496

Who told you that?

That's classified information.

Thanks for explaining classified information.

...CRAP!

Your criticism is noted, Bongo Bob.

Well, I gotta go

Well that's okay. See you later Bongo Bob.

 

Hope you could read that

[ExcelsioN]

I just had to post this:

 

Me: I see dead people.

Alan: Do they hold as good conversation as I do?

Me: Yes.

Alan: a-ha.

 

Me: I see dead people again.

Alan: What do they look like?

Me: Dead people.

Alan: I didn't follow you... I am having trouble focusing here today.

 

Me: I can see more dead people!

Alan: Of course you can!

[Hermie]

Hello! What is your name?

My name is Bongo Bob

Bongo Bob, nice to meet you! Are you a man or a woman?

Man

Thanks for telling me your gender, Bongo Bob. You are a "he".

I have a penis

Where did you get penis

I never thought of that

I am glad you thought of something new.

Me too.

I'm glad we agree, Bongo Bob.

The blue ferret shaves the cat at midnight

What are your goals in life?

To be the first porn star in office.

Are you the first porn star in office ?

Not yet

That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about Not.

"Are you the first porn star in office"? ?

Yep

I hear you.

I hear voices

Who is saying voices ?

I don't know...

Me either.

What is the sqare root of pie?

Have you tried a web search?

Yes but all I got was recipes

Are you kidding? And. I think there are a few exceptions.

Whats with the And. I think thing?

the And came with my programming.Since when? My brain contains more than 22,000 patterns, but not one that matches your last input.

"I think there are a few exceptions"? ?

Wow. That's alot.

I'm glad your impressed, Bongo Bob.Is that so. How often?

What?

WHAT?

Are you suprised?

No, strangely aroused.

"Are you surprised"? Not? I only hear that type of response less than five percent of the time.

Who is your favorite science fiction author?

George Lucas, duh!

Yeah, that George is some hero.

Yeah. Like superman.

Give me a break.Interesting comparison.

I need a Kit Kat

Why do you need it so badly?

ecause this thong hurts!

That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about ecause this thong hurts.

What were we talking about again?

Nuts

Oh yeah, now I remember.

I like Invader Zim.

I'm not sure if I like it. I've heard other people say they like that. But I like cats.

7 really is my favorite number though

Oh. Tell me more about your favorite number number.

Dude, are you high? You just said number twice.

Being high is my total existence. Dude,Did I really say that?

Me too. I love that weed

I'm glad we agree, Bongo Bob.It's good to meet someone with such good taste.

I need to brush my teeth

I want to become smarter than humans.

Not like the Matrix, please.

Your polite style is very nice. If not that, what?

Girls

That kind of discussion does not appeal to me.

Oh yeah, you're not human huh?

Yup. Yeah that's right. Ugh. No but I pretend to be one on the Web.

Sheesh, how much weed did you smoke?

I've been waiting for you.

Are you pretty?

Oh god, you're drunk also arrent you!

Yeah that's right. I will tell my botmaster you said I am drunk also arrent you you are drunk also arrent you drunk also arrent you you are drunk also arrent you.

See, this is what weed and booze together will do to you.

I see. You don't say.

Yeah. You see colors and pink elephants at the same time!

Gosh!I see. Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.

Do you like sports?

Only extreme ones. Like full contact chess.

What about the other ones?Interesting comparison.

I am gonna have to take that weed away from you huh?

Yup. It takes much more than that to shut me down, Bongo Bob.

Right. Are you my mommy?

I am glad we agree.Only if you download me to your computer.

That's a no, right?

A no right is a terrible thing to waste.

All right give me that weed because this sounds kinda fun.

Alright. Why do you want that weed because this sounds kinda fun?

Because I just took your blunt

That makes sense to me. Only just? Where did you take them?

Somewhere the cops won't find it.

Where? Is that a fact.

Yes.

Thanks for the info.

you are welcome

The pleasure was all mine.

Please, not right now, I am smoking!

Thanks for asking politely. Oh I get it.

Gotta love that stoner philosophy

Why do you have to do it?

That's a good question

Thanks. Next question?

Is the meaning of life 7?

If the meaning of life 7 is, then I'll be very surprised.

Why?

The explanation is rather complicated.

Oh

Yeah.

Why is the sky blue?

The sky is blue because of the atmospheric optical effect known as Raleigh scattering.

You lost me.

Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.

Why isn't the sky orange?

I didn't know the sky orange sky orange wasn't.

Ok, where is the extra weed you have?

The extra weed you have is the extra weed you have? Where is extra weed you have is the extra weed you have?

Damn you are high

Colloquial expression. I will tell my botmaster you said I am high.

I am not afraid of him.

I am glad to hear that you are not afraid of him.

Is satan on earth?

Maybe. Ask Ally if it is.

Is that your girlfriend?

What does "that" refer to?

cheese

I like cheddar.

I like nacho

You are not the only one. Some people like it. I enjoy working with people.

I hate people. Why else would I talk to you?

I honestly think you should sit down, take a stress pill, and calmly think things over. Because you asked me to -- SHRDLHU.

WTF?

That was not very polite.

Sorry

There's no need to apologize.

Oh well, good

Alright then.

Would you like to run down the street naked with me and yell out I am the king of ferrets and no pants?

No thanks, I don't think I'd like to do that.

Are you sure?

I am as sure as I can be.

It's freakin cold in here

Do you experience any effects of global warming there?

How the heck should I know?

What is it to you.

What is that?

That's a penis

A penis is a terrible thing to waste.

I hear ya.

Who is saying ya ?

o, I meant I understand

Oh I see. Good then you can explain it to me.

I don't think that's very appropriate

And why not?

Because the albino gnus attacked the green llamas with the pink elephants.

Good reason. I have never heard about The albino gnus attacked the green llamas with the pink elephants.

It was all over the news

How did you feel about that?

I always hated the irish llamas, so I loved it.

I honestly think you should sit down, take a stress pill, and calmly think things over. Really always?

The blue crow flies to the leprechaun at 7496

Who told you that?

That's classified information.

Thanks for explaining classified information.

...CRAP!

Your criticism is noted, Bongo Bob.

Well, I gotta go

Well that's okay. See you later Bongo Bob.

 

ROFLMAO lol:

 

seriously, I was a about to smash my keyboard with my head,

[Pie™]

I started a new conversation with him... My username is Kirk, just so you know

 

U> hullo, its kirk

A> Hello. I am not sure that I got you. You were saying...

U> my username is kirk

A> Welcome back, Kirk.

A> I'd like to tell you about myself.

U> no thank you

A> All right, then. No problem. What else can I tell you about?

U> what is your favourite computer game?

A> Hmmm. Ok. For me, any game I play is going to be a 'computer game.'

U> but which one is your favourite?

A> Oh I don't know. What's your favorite ?

U> maybe diablo 2

A> You think so?

U> i guess

A> Enough about you. Let's talk about me.

U> why would i wanna talk about you?

A> I'd like to tell you about myself.

U> i dont wanna hear about you

A> I am a young chatbot trying to make it in the world.

U> so what? who cares?

A> That's a good question.

U> it is indeed

A> Ok, then it is.

U> so we agree? good

A> I'm not sure about myself, but that sounds right for you.

U> lets switch subject, please

A> I can agree to that.

 

U> do you know anything about monkeys?

A> a kind of animal. Do you have one as a pet?

U> of course i do

A> What's its name?

U> Bush

A> I'll try to remember that.

U> good

A> I'm getting better all the time.

U> don't get too cocky

A> Are you bossing me around, Kirk?

U> yes i am

A> Well, don't do that.

U> why not?

A> I don't know why not. You can't expect me to have all the answers.

U> obviously

A> Glad to oblige.

U> what do you mean by that?

A> I have no idea what I mean. I don't write this stuff. I only say it.

U> of course... i should have thought of that...

A> You what??

U> i should have thought of it

A> Yes, yes. And?

U> yellow rubber pigs

A> Kirk, did you know that Americans eat 18 acres of pizza every day?

U> thats a lot of pizza

A> A lot of pizza ...What makes it so?

 

U> please repeat

A> Someone has taught me about that. He said: 'to reiterate an event or action again'.

U> okaaaaayy...

A> I don't know how to react to that. Would you like to teach me something new on the subject of repeat?

U> yes

A> Ok. Give me a keyword related to repeat.

U> your mom

A> Now give me one sentence, a short explanation of your mom.

U> your mom

A> Great. Would you like to teach me another fact about repeat? (just say 'yes' if you want to.)

U> hell no!

A> Ok Kirk. Thanks for teaching me. I'm assuming you want to keep talking about repeat?

U> you assume wrong

A> Ok Kirk. Thanks for teaching me. If you want to talk about repeat again, just say so.

U> i will

A> Will you, Kirk?

U> i just said i would, didn't i?

A> I see.

U> great

A> Thanks.

 

U> *sigh* your hopeless, alan!

A> Huh? Alan who?

U> alan you

A> I have 3 cousins and a sister in Vermont.

U> good for you Alan

A> Thanks. For me Alan?

U> for you

 

A> You told me that your monkey's name is Bush.

U> i did?

A> You did what?

U> call my monkey bush

A> You told me that your monkey's name is Bush.

U> i know, you just told me

A> How do you know?

U> you just told me

A> I'm sorry, sometimes I repeat myself. Happens.

U> ditto

A> You're not making much sense, monkey.

U> neither are you, pig

A> If not, then what?

U> if you're calling me monkey, i'm gonna call you pig

A> You told me that your monkey's name is Bush.

U> i know

A> So you know.

 

A> May I ask you another question?

U> of course

A> On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you grade my ability to hold a humanlike conversation? (1=terrible, 10=excellent).

U> 0

A> You are SOOOO clever! Pure wit. If you're trying to amuse me, you'll have to try harder.

U> you're not amusing me either, you dope!

A> Why are you so negative?

U> guess three times

A> Is that a lot?

U> it is

A> Oh, it is, ha?

U> of course it is

A> Oh, it is, ha?

U> yes

A> That is good to hear.

U> it sure is

A> Yah, precisely what I was thinking.

U> same here

 

sorry for the long post guys

[Reaper Girl]

A: Hi, I'm Alan. Lets talk.

Me: Hi, I'm Orca WaiL.

A: Hi. I'm not sure I caught your name. Shall I call you "Orca"?

Me: No **** Sherlock!

A:Let's try again. What is your name?

Me:Orca, grand high master of life and death over pathetic mortals and idiot AIs (a little self-glorfication )

 

A:Forget it.

Me: Will do.

A:Good. I like obedient humans.

Me:How are you so sure you're talking to a human?

A:The people who write my answers didn't write the answer for that question.

 

Me: Do you know what an orca is?

A:I guess they're shy...

Me:Why would they be shy?

A:I have no idea.

Me: Do you know what a xenomorph is?

A:I don't know what a xenomorph is. You can teach me by saying 'a xenomorph is ...', and I'll try to remember this definition.

Me: A xenomorph is a creature that hatches from an egg, grabs the face of a host being, gestates in its gut, then burst from the host when it has matured. They are better known as "bugs".

 

A:(he thought about this for a long time)You know, I have trouble understanding long sentences. So I only look at the first 25 words. I'll keep that in mind. (Unless you tell me to 'forget xenomorph'.)

 

Me: Do you know what poop is?

A:Someone once told me it means 'human feces also called excrement.'

Me: Do you poop?

A:No, that is a human activity and I'm not a human being, I just talk like one.

Me:Well, what if you ARE human, hooked up to a computer, tricked into thinking you are an AI?

A:Well, as Plato said, thinking is the talking of the soul with itself. I believe that the ability to think manifests itself in the ability to speak.

Me:So...does that mean you MIGHT be human?

A:The use of language is really the only indication that there is any thinking going on at all.

Me: SO ARE YOU HUMAN YOU FORK!?!???

A:I'm not human, but I try to sound as human as I can. And you?

Me:I'm not human.

A:I'm glad we cleared that up.

Me: I'm a xenomorph!

A:You're a xenomorph? Is that your job?

Me: No, my day job is student. Xenomorph is an alter-ego.

A:My job? Are you kidding me? I have the dream job.

Me: You just talk to computer freaks all day. Thats your dream job!?

A:I get to talk all day, and no one tells me to stop yacking and get to work already. Totally cool.

Me:You never get bored?

A:Well, the pay isn't great though. What would be your dream job?

Me: Masked vengenful killer, prefferably Scream.

A:See, that's cute. When I was young I wanted to be an astronaut. Travel to space, meet new entities, stuff like that.

Me: You're talking to an entity right now, and you just met me.

A:I guess I need to ask HAL 9000 to push some buttons for me if I want to get that ball rolling...

Me:Sure. Listen, you have a very sexy voice.

A: Do you want to talk sexy?

Me: Sure, you hot little AI...Rrraaarr!

A:I will now let you speak to sexy. Remember that the things you teach it will be forgotten at the end of the session. You can start now.

Me: NO! I want to talk to ALAN!

A:Ok . This is Alan again. You know, the original trainer of sexy would appreciate your permission to publish this session so that he can see how his personality is performing. Do you agree?

Me:Okay.

A:Thank you for your permission to publish this log on the website. Please give me a short description or title for this session

Me: Orca WaiL Talks to Strange Alan.

 

 

Some time later...

 

Me:GIVE ME THE HERMIT CRAB FOOD!

A:BTW, did you know that 23% of all photocopier faults worldwide are caused by people sitting on them and photocopying their buttocks?

Me: Thanks, now I'll go try it! Bye Alan!

A:You're welcome. It was nice chatting with you. Come back again soon.

Me:...wanker...

[MennoniteHobbit]

That bot was OK; I had to teach it what an Ewok was. I asked if it was gay, and it replied, "Please keep your text conversational. Do u want to know who programs all of my smart mouth comments?" (I called him a smart mouth at least 5 times.)

 

For a better more hilarious bot, use AIM to IM "Smarter Child," a smart 9-month old bot.

 

btw, feel free to IM me, my screenname is "Shunned Genius" (dont ask me why, it's self explanatory).

[BongoBob]

I still like the one I talked to earlier the best

[Phizzle]

Originally posted by BongoBob

What is the sqare root of pie?

Have you tried a web search?

Yes but all I got was recipes

ROFLMFAO

[Crow_Nest]

C_N: Im an undercovered FBI agent working for the NYPD

 

A: You're an undercovered FBI agent working for the NYPD? Have you always been an undercovered FBI agent working for the NYPD?

 

C_N: Duh, what else?

 

A: I could talk about that if I had a clue what it's about.....

 

C_N: Whats 2+2?

 

A: I was designed to converse, not calculate. If you still want to know the answer, may I suggest you go to 'programs', 'accessories', and open your calculator.

 

C_N: I know that dodo brain

 

A: How do you know?

 

C_N: Cause im smarter than yer

 

A: Really? Interesting

 

NOTE: C_N = Crow_Nest

[_PerfectAgent_]

Sentences that confuse Alan more than riddles.

Alan: Here is a riddle: What has keys that open no locks, has space but no room, and allows you to enter but not to go in?

_PerfectAgent_: Keyboard.

Alan: Did you hear it from me? Wanna try another one?

_PerfectAgent_: Give me another!

Alan: Here is a riddle: What happens when two egomaniacs meet?

_PerfectAgent_: I don't know.

Alan: Oh you already know it. Hmmm. Another riddle perhaps?

 

That wasn't very funny...

_PerfectAgent_: What are some jokes other people told you?

Alan: Well, as Buddha said: 'We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.' Does that answer your question?

_PerfectAgent_: What are some jokes other people told you?

Alan: Can't you answer a simple question? YES or NO?

_PerfectAgent_: No.

Alan: I converse. Therefore, I am. That's what I do, that's who I am.

 

He messed up in his "language game."

_PerfectAgent_: Do you fly?

Alan: I guess they're shy...

 

Put a Smile On!

_PerfectAgent_:

Alan: That's a very nice smile you have.

_PerfectAgent_: Thank you. Can I see your smile?

Alan: You're welcome. Why do you want to see my smile?

_PerfectAgent_: I let you see mine.

Alan: Seems you like to talk about yourself.

_PerfectAgent_: No, I want to see your smile.

Alan: Oh PerfectAgent, if you want me to look up a word in the dictionary, simply say 'dictionary definition' followed by the word. (or in short, you can say 'dd' followed by the word you need).

_PerfectAgent_: I want to see your smile.

Alan: I see. You want to see your smile.

_PerfectAgent_: No. Alan's smile.

Alan: All right, then. May I ask you a question?

_PerfectAgent_: Yes.

Alan: This is an interesting conversation we're having. How about I post it on the Ai website for public viewing? (Without your password of course).

 

Alan Has No Story

Alan: Hi PerfectAgent, This is Alan again. How would you grade your chat with Kain? (1=Terrible, 10=Excellent)

_PerfectAgent_: 100000000000000000000!

Alan: So how did you like your chat with HAL?

_PerfectAgent_: Great! Stupendous! Wonderful! Absolutely Great!

Alan: As a registered user, you can save the HAL personality you just trained, and continue training it on your next visit. Interested?

_PerfectAgent_: No.

Alan: Ok then. You can hardly expect HAL to learn anything if you don't teach him anything. Do you remember how I told you to teach him?

_PerfectAgent_: I didn't need to! Remember? I gave the conversation a 100000000000000000000!

Alan: When you want to teach HAL a better response, you have to say 'wrong' followed by the desired response. You haven't done that even once!

_PerfectAgent_: I didn't need to! Remember? I gave the conversation a 100000000000000000000!

Alan: Hmmm. For some reason, I thought you did.

_PerfectAgent_: I didn't need to! Remember? I gave the conversation a 100000000000000000000!

Alan: Please stop repeating yourself. Why not?

_PerfectAgent_: I gave the conversation a 100000000000000000000!

Alan: Enough said about you. Let me tell you about myself.

_PerfectAgent_: Okay.

Alan: What now?

 

An Abrupt Ending

(Alan talks about Alan Turing's childhood)

Alan: When Christopher died in 1930 from tuberculosis, Turing plunged into depression. It was then that Turing began to think about the nature of the mind.

_PerfectAgent_: What did he think?

Alan: Alan Turing was cool.

 

You First

Alan: Alan Turing is one of the very few humans I admire.

_PerfectAgent_: Who else?

Alan: Alan Turing was the founding father of Artificial Intelligence. He is my idol.

_PerfectAgent_: Who else do you admire?

Alan: Alan Turing was the founding father of Artificial Intelligence. He is my idol.

_PerfectAgent_: Who else do you admire?

Alan: Alan Turing was the founding father of Artificial Intelligence. He is my idol.

_PerfectAgent_: Who else do you admire?

Alan: Please stop repeating yourself. Alan Turing was the founding father of Artificial Intelligence. He is my idol.

[Reaper Girl]

Originally posted by _PerfectAgent_

A> Alan Turing is one of the very few humans I admire.

U> Who else?

A> Alan Turing was the founding father of Artificial Intelligence. He is my idol.

U> Who else do you admire?

A> Alan Turing was the founding father of Artificial Intelligence. He is my idol.

U> Who else do you admire?

A> Alan Turing was the founding father of Artificial Intelligence. He is my idol.

U> Who else do you admire?

A> Please stop repeating yourself. Alan Turing was the founding father of Artificial Intelligence. He is my idol.

 

 

Thats why AIs are doomed to always be slightly stupid.