Jump to content

Home

Wow...who knew they gave out awards for THAT?


Achilles

Recommended Posts

the sad part about this whole thing was that i wasn't thinking it was a literary prize before i read the article you linked to. if i say anything else, well, it probably wouldn't be very appropriate. :rolleyes:

 

back on topic: that is a weird award. sounds like a rather dubious distinction, IMHO. but then again, isn't that the point??

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hmmm... The author in question seems unfazed by what seems to be the literary world's Razzie equivalent.

Hollingshead, 25, who received his award from rocker Courtney Love at a London ceremony, said he was delighted to become the prize's youngest winner.

 

"I hope to win it every year," said Hollingshead, who receives a statuette and a bottle of champagne.

:lol: "Thank you, sir! May I have another?" heh-heh-heh :smirk2:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ahhh, CM, you beat me to the punch there (Razzies). However, I gotta admit that sex scenes in novels are often kinda embarrassing to have to read, and they aren't restricted to merely bawdy romance novels. Embarrasing not in the sense of prudery, but overall quality of prose and that they just seem out of place. No interest in romance novels, unless they would make me rich, but I'd probably have to say that I was a sanitation worker......truth in advertising, as it were. :jester1:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Embarrasing not in the sense of prudery, but overall quality of prose and that they just seem out of place.

 

Well, it depends on which novel. I've read quite a few scenes that were good quality in novels. Often, they deal with such subjects in the first place (not erotic novels mind you), so I suppose the author knows what he's doing.

 

 

that's true. you know what they say "there's no such thing as bad publicity" (or something like that)

 

It does. I really want to read this guy's novel just for the crappy sex scenes. Might give me a good laugh or two :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If anyone can do it, you can ;)

 

Now what kinds of things would a winner say to a reporter after winning a prize like this? Here's a little article (with a nod to SNL's Schweddy Balls skit).

 

Schwedi Baulz gets tied with Blue Passion

 

Reporter: Mr. Baulz, on behalf of the Romance and Bodice-Ripper Novel Society, we’d like to congratulate you on your latest award for Bad Sex in a Novel, the Blue Passion Tie. We’re amazed at your creativity this year, which has exceeded your previous attempts by at least 6 inches. What was your secret?

 

Baulz: Well, this year, I got my inspiration from a plate of food. I was sitting down for dinner one night for my wife’s special hot dog burritos, and the flash of insight just hit me—what if we make all the euphemisms out of food? So, I sat down and started to make my list.

 

Reporter: Yes, we noticed your creative, and might I add, flavorful contributions. Please tell our readers what kinds of terms won you this award.

 

Baulz: It’s difficult to come up with unique names, which should never be the same in any other scenes. Anyone can use the plain old anatomical terms, but it takes a true artist to come up with “heaving Matronly Muskmelons, ripe for the picking” and “the Manly Carrot of Craving found the Lettuce Wrap of her femininity.”

 

Reporter: We found the “Shredded Cheese Taco of Ecstasy” to be a perfect foil to the delicious “Copular Cucumber of Hanky-Panky.”

 

Baulz: The goal is to provide a treat for all the senses in a bodice ripper novel. I just had to include “He stuffed her Manicotti of Ardor with his Rigid Ring-bologna of Rapture”.

 

Reporter: Where else could you find the “The Virile Love-Zucchini filled her Sweet Cherry Cream Canoli of Concupiscence”? Yet you carefully avoided any reference to bananas.

 

Baulz: Well, I didn’t want to be over-the-top. You have to set a standard somewhere.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

its wierd, i always imagine women as the writers of these books

Hey! Now that's just sexist. Men can write just as poorly as women. :xp:

 

I thought it was a requirement of the Y chromosome that no male ever looks at hot dogs in the normal way.

Well, not since Bachelor Party was released. ("Is this the foot-long?")

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...