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XWA one year thread IV: The Clown Wars


K_Kinnison

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happy birthday gunner!

 

yeah...i tried calling her, but looks like she blocked my number, or changed it. it's unlisted, and i'm not going to just drop money in a p.o. box, would rather see to it personally. her last voicemail said she wasn't going to call again. but i think she's said that before.

 

I hate it when all i can see in a person is good, even when there's so much bad. we were going to go to maui in december. =\ that would have been fun...

 

also her voicemail she said she got really sick, etc. and before that saturday, she was in good health...(though not sure about her mental state)...i kind of feel like i used her, but then she made me feel like that...if she hadn't harassed my parents about me 2 weeks before the 14th, i would probably still be with her, hell i even stopped thinking about the age difference.

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I have decided I'm going to buy myself a Mesa/ Boogie Mark V amp for myself this year.

 

It's been a long time since I've had a case of gear lust this bad... but I always wanted a Mark IV, and could never afford one.

 

I'm gonna get this one.

 

Donations are welcome. :dozey:

 

:D

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these 'contacts for astigmatism' suck. gonna just tell the eye doctor the ones they first gave me to try out were just great. and they were. they didn't dry out as fast..these ones seem like they dry out instantaneously! yay for the eye drop sales! -_-

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I have decided I'm going to buy myself a Mesa/ Boogie Mark V amp for myself this year.

 

It's been a long time since I've had a case of gear lust this bad... but I always wanted a Mark IV, and could never afford one.

 

I'm gonna get this one.

 

Donations are welcome. :dozey:

 

:D

 

Ha! You probably make more money than anyone else here! Then again, you do seem to suffer more home-related expenses than anyone else...

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Well... I'd guess Gunner might have more family expenses than I... but he probably lives in a far more affordable part of the country, too.

 

But my budget situation just more complex, too: today is mom's last day at work... probably forever.

 

She's not going to be able to contribute to the household fund the way she used to now... living on retirement (which is currently hurting thanks to the market tanking...) and social security... so my paycheck is going to get spread a little thinner.

 

So big, non-essential expenditures like that will become even rarer for me in the future.

 

Oh well... I knew this day would come eventually.

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it's stress. this house is too small for 3 people+3 pets. plus my mom drives me insane constantly talking about retarded **** and asking retarded questions and ****. it's nice and all that she's concerned about me, but i can only take so much of it. i come home from work and suddenly i get like super-depressed i can't take it anymore. and then dealing with my parents it turns into something worse than being depressed. it's like i want to show them how i feel but in doing so i feel as if they'd get way too concerned about me and their little bit of concern makes me feel smothered, well showing them how i feel, their reactions and **** would throw me over the edge. probably not suicidal, but going out and doing stupid **** like getting myself fired and **** like that.

 

it's ****ing complicated, which is why i try and just hold everything in and appear apathetic about everything and do my best to try and tune out everything that annoys the living hell out of me.

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it's stress. this house is too small for 3 people+3 pets. plus my mom drives me insane constantly talking about retarded **** and asking retarded questions and ****. it's nice and all that she's concerned about me, but i can only take so much of it. i come home from work and suddenly i get like super-depressed i can't take it anymore. and then dealing with my parents it turns into something worse than being depressed. it's like i want to show them how i feel but in doing so i feel as if they'd get way too concerned about me and their little bit of concern makes me feel smothered, well showing them how i feel, their reactions and **** would throw me over the edge. probably not suicidal, but going out and doing stupid **** like getting myself fired and **** like that.

 

it's ****ing complicated, which is why i try and just hold everything in and appear apathetic about everything and do my best to try and tune out everything that annoys the living hell out of me.

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yeah, well the problem is i get to sleep then someone ****ing wakes me up. if there wasn't ANYONE around i would actually be able to get sleep. i guess i could resort to sleeping medication on nights i know i have the next day off of work...but i would still be forced awake. i need my own place

 

i'm just glad it's spring and the ****ing snow is gone so i can get the **** out of the house and do ****.

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