jediduo Posted December 14, 2002 Share Posted December 14, 2002 I'm going to meet this girl at a friend's church Sunday, and I don't know what to do. I've only had one girlfriend, and I knew her a while before we started dating. Plus, I'm terrible about meeting girls. What should I do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chewbacco Posted December 14, 2002 Share Posted December 14, 2002 What you should do is also post this thread in Yoda's swamp and get more answers there faster since it is a very popular forum and you will pobably get like 50 posts in less than 18 hours. Go with my advice man.:thumbsup:And then you will have twice the answers in less than 18 hours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted December 14, 2002 Share Posted December 14, 2002 And only about 10% of them will actually be good serious answers. Eh...meeting new people is a good thing. Get to know them first of course before anything serious happens. Don't be nervous, don't try to be someone you aren't. Just be yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silenthunter Posted December 14, 2002 Share Posted December 14, 2002 Yeah, just be yourself. Try not to jump too deep into anything at first. Pretty much what R9 said. I'm sure you'll be fine And good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Groovy Posted December 14, 2002 Share Posted December 14, 2002 You know I really freaked out when I read this topic, I seen a movie a while back called Femailian which was nothing more than soft core porn. See for yourself: Femalien Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted December 14, 2002 Share Posted December 14, 2002 I had no idea you were such an expert on softcore porn, Grooves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Homer Posted December 14, 2002 Share Posted December 14, 2002 where did you think he got the name "groovy" from? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Young David Posted December 14, 2002 Share Posted December 14, 2002 Originally posted by jediduo I'm going to meet this girl at a friend's church Sunday ... For one thing ... You have some strange motivation to go to church. I mean ... you don't go to church for the chicks do you? (altough ... looking at my church there are some nice looking ... let's keep on topic ) My only tip would be ... be yourself and noone else. Trust me ... I've only had a girl once a long time ago. I know all about women Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surfnshannon Posted December 15, 2002 Share Posted December 15, 2002 I'm a woman...yup even that test of rhetts said so. NE ways I'm sure she is just as nervous as you are. Like everyone else said. Be yourself, be polite and don't so much think of it as Judgement. Just go there to meet her - just think of it as making a new friend. That is really the key. Good Luck! I'm sure it will work out just fine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue15 Posted December 15, 2002 Share Posted December 15, 2002 heh go there and make out in front of everybodys, better yet, buy her something with your titheing money! uh ya just go there to meet her and be yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue15 Posted December 15, 2002 Share Posted December 15, 2002 ok now that we've got YOU squared away, what about Rogue15? There's this girl at pizza hut i got a crush on kinda like, and i'll probably ask her out sometime, but first need some more information about her. anybody have any suggestions for how i can find out more about her? (i'm not afraid to talk to her ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chewbacco Posted December 15, 2002 Share Posted December 15, 2002 May the force be with you. Just be yourself. The worst you could do is be someone your not. That is stupid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jediduo Posted December 15, 2002 Author Share Posted December 15, 2002 Originally quoted by Darth Groovy: I seen a movie a while back called Femalien which was nothing more than soft core porn. Oops. I had no idea, Groovsy-boy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue15 Posted December 15, 2002 Share Posted December 15, 2002 the last thing you don't want to do is just sit there and let her do the conversation starting. (makes you feel so weak and stupid) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazy_dog no.3 Posted December 15, 2002 Share Posted December 15, 2002 Originally posted by Rogue15 ok now that we've got YOU squared away, what about Rogue15? There's this girl at pizza hut i got a crush on kinda like, and i'll probably ask her out sometime, but first need some more information about her. anybody have any suggestions for how i can find out more about her? (i'm not afraid to talk to her ) Hire a private detective. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WolfmanNCSU Posted December 16, 2002 Share Posted December 16, 2002 Originally posted by Rogue15 ok now that we've got YOU squared away, what about Rogue15? There's this girl at pizza hut i got a crush on kinda like, and i'll probably ask her out sometime, but first need some more information about her. anybody have any suggestions for how i can find out more about her? (i'm not afraid to talk to her ) Then ask her out, talk to her....how else will you find out about her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted December 16, 2002 Share Posted December 16, 2002 Ah yes...the denizens of GB.com, perpetually giving love advice to the affection deficient. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surfnshannon Posted December 16, 2002 Share Posted December 16, 2002 one thing though rogue15...this girl is at pizza hut. Well hum did you bump into her one day getting pizza. One thing is...you don't want to keep going to see her and end up looking like a pizza stalker. NE ways. I'd just talk to her - see if you can get her number. Then I'd call her and start talking to her. If you like what you hear than I'd ask her out. I'm not a guy so I really don't know what you guys do to get to know a girl. I know most girls don't like to do the calling and also you gotta find out if she has a man! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue15 Posted December 16, 2002 Share Posted December 16, 2002 but the thing is, i hate phones. i'll just ask her about herself at work, it's easier to find out about people by just asking them. o yeah, there's one more thing, she said she liked my smile. (i almost always smile, it's a habit. ) edit: btw i also work at the same pizza hut. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Snow Posted December 18, 2002 Share Posted December 18, 2002 Just something I've learned cause I've screwed up a lot of relationships: A girlfriend is really a girl-friend... a lot of younger ppl (and myself back when I was 14, 15; I'm 17 now) think that a girlfriend is SUPPOSED to be all romantic, with flowers and dances and fairy tale happenings. To be honest, having a girl is just having a really close friend who you're not afraid to share anything with and you're physically attracted to. But the fact is, the relationship should be completely based on a friendship, and then built up (like a pyramid) to higher and higher levels of closeness and trust and love. That's why I think it's imperative to know someone for months before going out with them; "Do you go out with them because you like them or do you go out with them to get to know them?" Most guys, as I always have, even if we believe in 1 we always do 2. Of course doing 2 gives one BIG disadvantages: Should something wrong happen, it is a LOT harder to "break up" with someone who you weren't really liking but either physically attracted to or hoping to like than just a normal friend. A few times I've taken things too fast and "bit off more than I can chew" when I wanted to stop talking to the girl. On the other hand I met this one girl in a class of mine and I just went and spent an hour walking around the college with her on a break and realized she wouldn't stop swearing, was extremely quiet and just WAY too apathetic and tough for my tastes but since I hadn't even done anything at all it was relatively easy to stop talking to her and we still say hi in the halls and there's no enmity there. Also, worse thing is a potential gf becomes a best friend (happened to me) instead of a rejection or ex, and a potential best friend becomes a gf. Of course I have no clue if this is good advice, as I am single (and I also cook, listen, and am *generally* nice as well as cute (no comments Phil!)) but maybe STTCT (only girl I know here) can comment? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherack Nhar Posted December 18, 2002 Share Posted December 18, 2002 Originally posted by Jon Snow [...]as well as cute (no comments Phil!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surfnshannon Posted December 18, 2002 Share Posted December 18, 2002 lost me in the second to last paragraph snow I agree with the whole "relationships" are built on good friendships. You have to be friends with the person you are with! You have to be able to talk and share the same things in common or you are just never going to make it! Because after all the flowers and romance has died down its really your friendship that holds you together. Because everyday is not a *holiday* in relationships like in the movies where everything is just oh perfect. Stuff happens and you two need to survive together and work as a team. That's a relationship and then plus all that other bonus stuff . yes you risk a lot when the nature of your friendship changes to a relationship...but that's the nature of the game. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Snow Posted December 18, 2002 Share Posted December 18, 2002 lost me in the second to last paragraph snow Sorry STTCT, what I was trying to say was: Some ppl ask out others because they like them already and others hoping they'll like them. Of course, if I hope I like you, but I don't I'm going to have to not talk to you or just be friends. Now if we're already just friends then I can choose to not develop the relationship, but, when you've already gone out for the wrong reasons (to get to know somebody) and it doesn't work out, because it's those wrong reasons, it's extremely difficult and hurtful to just stop talking and even harder to stay friends; normally both of you like each other because you think you do but neither of you KNOW how you feel. I suppose even ahat one makes no sense but I'm just saying that if you see some cute girl, don't go up to her thinking you're gonna ask her out in a week, take her to a movie in two, and be her boyfriend in a month you two DON'T even know each other! On the other hand, talk to the girl, if there's some kind of friendship connection be friends, have a frienly conversation, and if there's a physical attraction, nothing's wrong with flirting (I personally enjoy lighthearted flirting). And also, at times I've thought someone's liked me but they didn't and I've embarrassed myself on misread signs; as well as saved face by being subtle. Rogue, Jedi, if you see a cute girl, you're NOT going to have her the first time you talk to her. Life is not the movies. If you have her the first day, it's prolly going to be an extremely shallow, physical and unsatisfying relationship. Just go to these girls, and try to be their friend. There's also so much to factor in with why couples go out - are you sure you're gonna stand going out with this girl if (Insert pet peeve here). Also, the girl has to like YOU. But even then, I've seen so many times where it "should've" worked and it just didn't. Well, I hope that helps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surfnshannon Posted December 18, 2002 Share Posted December 18, 2002 ah - i'll explain how I met my fiancee and we were "friends first" I was working at un indisclosable location (so the stalkers won't find me) at a retail store. My fiancee was my boss. The first time we met I was put on a register and I didn't have a clue how to run it!!! He came to my rescue. Later he told me he liked me from the moment he saw me. Anyways I was not all that attracted to him I actually liked someone else. My fiancee was not someone that I would normally date. As I am into that 'boyish look' and surfer looking guys. I also like people who are a little reckless etc. Well my fiancee was dating this chick (whom i was not sooo found of) she was 6 years older than him, had a kid etc. Now then, as the months went on I started to get to know my fiancee. We would only talk for about 3 min and usually just joking about how horrible the stuff was at the store. He would pick on my department and make me do stuff that I never saw him expect of the other employees. The night I realised I liked him I was fixing an aisle of Christmas Cards and he came down the aisle to give me stuff that belonged to my department. He was teasing me and finnaly I saw him in a different light! BUT HE WAS DATING ANOTHER CHICK IN THE STORE. Oh what to do. I talked to my friends about it and they definatly thought he liked me too but also adviced me not to make the first move as he was attached. My friend started trying to talk him into "hanging" out with us and he never did. A bunch of us friends would go after work to the late night restraunts and hang out and my fiancee would never go. I think he felt uncomfortable cuz he was our boss. Well one night I convinced him to come. Well he said he broke up with his girl!! I was SOOO NERVOUS!! He started going with us more frequently to the restraunts and I really really liked him - then suddenly he got back with the chick again!! I almost cried. I think I did. Then suddenly something happened. We started talking a lot more, him and I. After work we started racing our cars around and finnaly one night we ended up in a parking lot and talked for MANY HOURS. Meanwhile he was still with his other woman. From this we started hanging out, going to see movies, I helped him put up his christmas lights, we talked about the pressures he had over his College (he was failing), his parents pressure and of course the chick. We never kissed or hugged or even said we liked eachother EVER. I felt uncomfortable with the fact that he was with the other girl. He started calling me on the phone a lot and we would talk all the time. One night at work he sent me a text message of 143 on my beeper (back when those were kewl) 143 means I love you. Well I didn't know what to think!! Here he is with this other chick! That same night we got into a tickling match and I knew I wanted to kiss him badly. He told me he really liked me, but he was with that other girl and what did I think. I said well we can't be anything more than friends while you are with her. He agreed. I said I can't tell you if I like you yet or not. So I kinda put my foot down. He broke up with his girl and 2 weeks later we were together. We finnaly kissed. She of course was pissed. The people at the store talked crap and eventually I left that job for another. People said we wouldn't last. And here we are 3 years later. And that's counting from the kiss...not since we had started "hanging out". I definatly think by waiting until he was broken up with his girl gave our relationship a good start. My advice is...make friends first. Get to know them well. Then when you start dating and things like what happened to us at work - when that starts happening it will only bring you closer together. -me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Snow Posted December 18, 2002 Share Posted December 18, 2002 Hey STTCT ... wow what an amazing way to get to be with someone. I just wanted to ask howcome you kept on waiting for him while he was with someone else and didn't go yourself and date other guys? And I wanted to comment that even THAT can be construed as a fairy tale (Guy doesn't want girl, girl waits forever, guy goes to girl), of course since I view love rather harshly, I suppose that I would find every sappy (they all are) love story fake and unrealistic but when I have my own it'll be just as bad **BTW, guys can comment too! Tell me and STTCT what you think from a male perspective? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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