PirateRedRosie Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 Go ahead! I like a good punchin'! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alien426 Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 Originally posted by Joshi And Alien, isn't binary a system of 8 numbers, not ten? No, it's the one with only 1s and 0s. Just set the Windows calculator to Bin, hack in "10" and set it to Dec. Then you'll get the joke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PirateRedRosie Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 No, it's the one with only 1s and 0s. Just set the Windows calculator to Bin, hack in "10" and set it to Dec. Then you'll get the joke. Dec. 10th is my birthday! Guess how old I'll be! That's not in my profile, is it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alien426 Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 You're 19 and will turn 20. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sivy Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 What's the best way to keep milk from turning sour? Leave it in the cow. What is blue, green, red, yellow, purple, orange, black, brown, and gray? A box of crayons. Tarzan had been living alone in his jungle kingdom for 30 years with only apes for company, and suitably shaped holes in trees for sex. Jane discovered Tarzan vigorously thrusting into a jungle oak. overcome by this display of animal passion Jane came out into the open and offered herself to him. as she reclined on the wild grass Tarzan ran up to her and gave her a big kick in the crotch. In pain she screamed "What the hell did you do that for???!!!" Tarzan replied, "Always check for squirrels." A girl was a prostitute and, for obvious reasons, kept it a secret from her grandma. One day, the police raided a brothel and arrested a group of prostitutes, including the young girl. The prostitutes were instructed to line up in a straight line on the sidewalk. Well, who should be walking in the neighbourhood, but little old Grandma. The girl was frantic. Sure enough, Grandma noticed her young granddaughter and asked curiously, "What are you lining up for, dear?" Not willing to let grandma in on her little secret, the young girl told her that some people were passing out free oranges and that she was lining up for some. "Mmm, sounds lovely," said Grandma. "I think I'll have some myself," she continued as she made her way to the back of the line. A police officer made his way down the line, questioning all of the prostitutes. When he got to Grandma, at the end of the line, he was bewildered. "But you're so old... how do you do it?" Grandma replied, "Oh, it's quite easy, sonny... I just remove my dentures and suck 'em dry!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PirateRedRosie Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 Originally posted by Alien426 You're 19 and will turn 20. You and your freaking MATH SKILLS! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PirateRedRosie Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 Hey, you just had your birthday a few days ago. Happy 26th, Alien426! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alien426 Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 Thanks, Rosie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinkie Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 That tarzan joke went against the spirit of this thread. I found myslef laughing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joshi Posted December 9, 2003 Share Posted December 9, 2003 Originaly posted by Alien426 No, it's the one with only 1s and 0s. Just set the Windows calculator to Bin, hack in "10" and set it to Dec. Then you'll get the joke. Okay, my joke was clever, but that one is just pushing new boundaries on the nerdometer. Okay, bad joke number 2 A man walks along the street and slips... silly man. Okay, so I cheated a little considering in a different context, that's it quite simply the funniest joke in the world (yes, that was what they said in that Monty Python sketch that killed everyone), but here, it's just pathetic, it's a crying shame. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shivermetimbers Posted December 10, 2003 Share Posted December 10, 2003 Ok so Cinderella (beofre she got married) is hanging out with Pinioccio. She knocks him to the ground, sits on his face, and starts yelling, "Lie to me, Lie to me!!!" The Disney movie of Pinnochio scares me a lot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinkie Posted December 10, 2003 Share Posted December 10, 2003 Are you positive it was before she got married? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Groovy Posted December 10, 2003 Share Posted December 10, 2003 Originally posted by Alien426 Thanks, Rosie. Hey congrats! I'm only 3 years older than you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoom Rabbit Posted December 10, 2003 Share Posted December 10, 2003 Q: Why did cats domesticate humans? A: So they could get milk without getting their heads stepped on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sivy Posted December 10, 2003 Share Posted December 10, 2003 thats pretty bad Zoom, but i got that beat... .... are you ready? *drum roll* .... *egg roll* .... *chicken chop suey and egg fried rice* .... Why did the owl 'owl? Because the woodpecker would peck 'er Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joshi Posted December 10, 2003 Share Posted December 10, 2003 Originally posted by Shivermetimbers Ok so Cinderella (beofre she got married) is hanging out with Pinioccio. She knocks him to the ground, sits on his face, and starts yelling, "Lie to me, Lie to me!!!" The Disney movie of Pinnochio scares me a lot. I've heard it before, but that doesn't make it less sick. How many star trek fans does it take to screw on a light bulb? Both of them. Okay, the nerdometer is now broken. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinkie Posted December 11, 2003 Share Posted December 11, 2003 I bet if you made that joke at a convention you'd be phased. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DrMcCoy Posted December 12, 2003 Share Posted December 12, 2003 Q: how do you call a dog with no legs? A: who cares? he won't come anyway! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ernil Posted December 13, 2003 Share Posted December 13, 2003 Why was the little shoe unhappy? Because his father was a loafer and his mother was a sneaker. get it? Get it? Get it? get it? GET IT? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Huz Posted December 14, 2003 Share Posted December 14, 2003 How many Doctor Who fans does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they just sit around waiting for it to come back on. Sorry Joshi, I've broken your new reinforced "nerd-o-meter" ;( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sivy Posted March 10, 2004 Share Posted March 10, 2004 w00t thread revival!!1one what type of car does a wookie drive? A Chewbac-Car worst air disaster ever yesterday in ireland! A 2-seater plane crashes into a cemetery, 1000s of bodies recovered. a bar walks into a man, er no wait... a skeleton walks into a bar. He says, "Get me a beer and a mop." What's Mary short for? She's got little legs. I bet the butcher he couldn't reach the beef on the top shelf, but he said the steaks were too high. What's the difference between a mosquito and a fly? A mosquito can fly, but a fly can't mosquito. What do you call a clairvoyant midget who escaped from prison? A small medium at large. ooh the pain!!!! *goes for a lie down* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ray Jones Posted March 10, 2004 Share Posted March 10, 2004 a horse walks into a bar. the barkeeper asks: "why the long face?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sivy Posted March 10, 2004 Share Posted March 10, 2004 why is it called hypertext? too much java A teenager walker into a drug store, he sheepishly told the druggist that he wanted a box of condoms. "That will be $5.00", the druggist said,"Plus tax." "TACKS!!!" the boy shouted," Don't they stay on by themselves?" A guy walked into a bar with his giraffe. He orders a drink, and the giraffe lay down beside him. The bartender barked angrily, "Excuse me, but you can't leave that lying there!" "er... It's not a lion. It's a giraffe." why do seagulls avoid the bay? because they don't want to be bagels Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rapp Scallion Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 OK, this is a joke that only works in Norwegian, but I'll post it in both norwegian and english, so you can decide wich one is the best. For all I know, you guys maybe think norwegian is exteremely funny. And by the way, I learned this joke from my cousin. I laughed very much the first time I heard it. Det var en gang en mann som gikk over et jorde, men det var bare noe han gjorde. Once upon a time there was a man that walked over a field, but that was just something he did. And another one that I learned from my sister, but I think that works in english too, so I'll just post this in english. Once upon a time there was a man that walked over a bridge, and then he did it. OK, for those who think norwegian is extremely funny, I'll write it in norwegian too. Det var en gang en mann som gikk over en bro, og så gjorde han det. CLAMBAKE! ERUPTION! CAN YOU HEAR ME SAYING NOTHING? ...in the slaughterhouse of my soul... FIDDLE DEE DEE! -Rapp Scallion Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skinkie Posted March 11, 2004 Share Posted March 11, 2004 Hahahaha... Norwegian... snicker.. heheheh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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