[Illustrated Fic]Passion of the Sith

[Quanon]

Heyo , this is my first attempt at writing out a story .

Hope its good , any comments are welcome , I'll only use this thread for story , the other one is just for my drawings

Anyway here's part one of my Nameless Fic .

 

PART I:

At the front-door:

 

Edit: Alread , as it was a bit short , I reworked Part 1 . It gives a bit more background to the characters ( which of course is importend )

I hope its an improvement . So here it is :

 

PART I:

At the front-door:

 

The sun was already low and her gloomy light made the red sand and rock of Korriban even more a flame .

Vaur looked at the big doors of this sith temple , the whole day he tried to open it , he could not find how the ancient mechanic behind the entrance worked . And as last attempt he placed some low-frequency charges .With a loud crashing sound of heavy rocks and bending metal the doors gave away . Vaur could catch a few glimpses of the interior of the temple as the dust started to settled .

Finanly , he could take a good look , the charges didn’t seem to have damaged much of the old architecture , nor did time seem to had any great effect . Vaur was shivering with anticipation to enter and explore or to wait for Ashaiya .

 

 

He pondered while staring at the door-frame and the scribbling on it ,then he decided he would wait and start to make the camp where they would sleep for the night . As Vaur was busy with the base-camp kit and installing the small power-generator , he heard a swoop-engine coming throw the valley , the sound grew louder and louder . He looked over his shoulder and saw a small whirlwind of red-orange dust..

In less than a minute Ashaiya passed on her swoop-bike, made a wide u-turn and stopped just next Vaur . She leaped of her seet , took of her helmet and gasped.

 

“You opened the tomb !” : cheered Ashaiya as she looked past him .

“Yes , my dear , I finanly lost my patients and blew it open , but with care”: said Vaur with a small smile on his face . “ You better did , you know how long we searched for this tomb ?”: replied Ashaiya . “ Hahaha , don’t get so jumpy my dear , I know that this temple holds one of the answers we’re looking for and that you broke your head on all those scripts and maps.”: said Vaur . “ Well ,…” Ashaiya stopped and looked at Vaur . She saw that little quirk on lips , , he always did that when she was getting furious and inpatient . So she decided to change the subject .” I see you almost finished the base-camp ,that’s nice cause I’m tired . Master Gannar made me practise that Force Blow again , but this time against three of those pesky droids .”: muttered Ashaiya as she yawned . “ You’ll get it , practice is the only way to improve or skills.”: answered Vaur. “ I know , I know , still I wished we would be fighting again , you learn more quickly in the heat of a good fight .”:replied Ashaiya . Vaur looked in her eyes and saw the ferocity he loved so much in her . Even when they were younglings she showed her anger and not to the liking of Master Ku’Adij. That was long ago , almost ages as Vaur thought back at what happened in just these few years. All they had done was follow Lord Revan and Malak to battle those Mandalorians . Yes , that one day back at the Temple of the Jedi on Coruscant when Revan spoke on the great square outside. What an oratory he gave , everyone who heard his story could not sit and rest . Then at the hight of his speech many Jedi cheered and where convinced to join him in his noble request and free the outer-rim systems of the Mandalorians Raiders. The high Council looked from out the shadow of the entrance to the temple , they had a grim look on their faces . The second day Revan gave another speech , but this time with the Supreme Chancellor and some Senators of captured systems . They’re little play did not miss it effects as even Jedi Knights and Masters joined Revan and the Republic Armada . From then on , war was the only thing Vaur and Ashaiya knew . And in the heat of many battles they developed a strong force bond . Ashaiya his most dear blazing fury .

 

”SLAM!!!” Suddenly Vaur was back on Korriban , she looked at him and threw him a multifood-canister .

After their small evening-meal they prepared them selves to enter the temple for a quick scout mission .

[Diego Varen]

Very short, but it's good. The image doesn't show up, but were you going to put images in this Fic? Looking foward to more.

[Quanon]

The image should be up now

[Diego Varen]

Great drawing, but there is no need to post the same Chapter again. Just edit your first Post. It's improved yes.

[TSR]

Very nice drawing. What did you use to colour it, if you dont mind me asking? I saw the original sketch, and it doesnt look like its been coloured by hand...

[CSI]

Nice picture. I like your fic and your illustration. Keep up!

[Quanon]

I used photoshop to paint my pic ; I know this program isn't avaible to lots of people ( I got it from school , education version).

Still my painting stay's primitive , cause I have to do with my mouse .

I'm saving up money for nice Wacom-digital pen set . Anyway Part 2 to should be up soon .

 

@TSR the rodian pics are coming along fine to . If I upload them should I post the hyperlinks in to your thread or just use my picture thread ?

 

Just keep things tidy and neat around here

[TSR]

 

@TSR the rodian pics are coming along fine to . If I upload them should I post the hyperlinks in to your thread or just use my picture thread

Just stick the hyperlinks on the thread moyt. Cheers for doing this btw

 

I've got photoshop as well, but what i don't have is any idea on how to use the damm thing. As i've said many times, mspaint is as far as my creating graphics goes.

[Quanon]

Ow , colouring this was very easy to do in photoshop.

If you want to now how I did this I can send a PM with some sort of tutorial thingy .

 

Anyway woudl this be a good title for my fic : Passion of the Sith. ???

Comments are welcome .

[TSR]

Ow , colouring this was very easy to do in photoshop.

If you want to now how I did this I can send a PM with some sort of tutorial thingy .

 

Anyway woudl this be a good title for my fic : Passion of the Sith. ???

Comments are welcome .

 

That would be awesome, if you wouldnt mind

 

lol, and passion of the sith sounds like a p**s tke of the passion of the christ.... Go for it

[Quanon]

Here it goes PART 2 . ow , and how do you change youre thread title as I'm now sure to call my story ; Passion of the Sith .

 

Part 2:

Hissing in the dark:

 

Vaur took the lead as his keen eyes saw a lot more in the dark , damp atmosphere of the tomb.

Soon the light of the withering sun disappeared , now they where completely surround by solid stone walls . Vaur turned his head around and took a deep breath , the air was heavy , tasted like dust ,dirt and earth . But what made Vaur nervous was this one smell , animals .

Even as Korriban was a desolate and dry planet , live existed . And it weren’t lovely gizka’s .

When the Sith claimed the world , he was in one of the first teams to enter the ancient academy . The place was crawling with Cyraks and Tuk’ata . Many of the new recruits where send in as a first test , not many survived . But the strongest remained and after a month most corridors and halls where cleansed of the beasts .

 

After a short walk throw some tunnels to the left they could hear a tinkling sound . Intrigued by this Ashaiya and Vaur followed the soft noise throw more corridors until they reached a small open area . This small open square seemed brightly light , but after a minute their eyes adapted to the surrounding area . Right before them they saw a fountain in the middle of the hall . It’s dark water coming out of the mouths of unknown creatures . “What a beautiful place ,must have been a meeting place or for meditation .”: said Vaur . “Look Ashaiya , the statue of Lord Decadetues”: shouted Vaur in excitement . “ Let me have look , maybe their’s a clue where his personal tomb chamber is .” ; she answered . “ Nope , nothing just his name and … well the rest is just gibberish .”

“Hmm , well we have plenty of time tomorrow for some serious reading and translation. Lets explore this corridor some further , maybe making a plan would be a smart idea.”: said Vaur .

“Wait Vaur , there’s another door , lets take that one , the scripture above says it leads to some sort of battle , armoury hall . Maybe we’ll find a relic. “: suggested Ashaiya . “ Alread lets follow that hallway .”: replied Vaur. Passing throw a long dark passage , full of broken statue’s posing in many fighting styles unfamiliar to Vaur and Ashaiya , they finanly arrived in a great open hall . To their surprise it was flat and empty , just a doorway on the other side .

Ashaiya started to cross the open space towards the door . As suddenly Vaur took roughly her arm and pulled her back . She was about to shoud against him as great raw hiss came from the door . A big full muscled Hssiss made him self visible , he looked at the two and gave another roar , deniaing them passage to the door . Vaur pulled his sabre , stepped closer and looked in to the eyes of the beast . It gave another hiss and clawed after Vaur . It tried many times to hit Vaur , but he would not budge , nor move and didn’t loose eye contact with the Hssiss .

 

 

Then he himself started to hiss and made animalistic sounds . The beast continued to attack , but still Vaur didn’t use his sabre . He just talked and so slowly the beast calmed down . Another tense minute Vaur and the Hssiss looked in each other eyes , then it turned around and disappeared in the dark . Then Ashaiya shouted : “ What in the Sith lord was that all about , why didn’t you let me attack that stupid beast ! We could have killed it ! You just let get away with that !”. “ Calm down . He’s a guardian , he just came and tested us if we where worthy enough to go deeper into the tomb .” : replied Vaur . “ What , you that thing could come back and eat us ! “ : she said still agitated and full of anger . Then with a quick swoop Vaur took Ashaiya up and carried her away to the fountain hall . He put her softly down on the border of the fountain and said :” Wait here for me , I’ll be back with some cloth’s , we’ll sleep here , that’s the real test Ashaiya , not butcher the holy guardian . You know how Hssiss are seen as divine creatures by the sith . Just wait here already.”

She looked in his eyes and gave a small smile .” Good .”: said Vaur with a sweet low voice as he walked away back to the camp .

 

 

“Oooww , I hated it when you do that Vaur !”: thought Ashaiya . Indeed Vaur was a quick and smooth talker . And he seemed to now what to say and propose to the right person .

Even the Master’s take him serious when he gives his thought about a subject .

Then she remembered how Vaur saved her many time’s from boring preaches of Jedi Master Ku’Adij . And she truly hated that man , from the beginning he preached her about the Jedi code , everyday she would do something wrong in his eyes . Always giving critic on her light sabre style and use of the force . Then things got worse , about the age of 14 she became his padawan . Luckily for her Vaur was there , he always listening and patient with her . She could scream and yell , even give him a punch in her anger . He never gave her speeches about she should be as a Jedi . And so they grew closer and closer over the years . Some way Master Ku’Adij noticed this and made sure all contact was broken between her and Vaur . From then on her hate for her master grew more and more everyday , until Revan and Malak appeared .

After his talk at the temple she gladly followed him to war , just to be away from Ku’Adij.

Later that day she saw Vaur talking with Malak , she gave a hard smack on his shoulder . Vaur looked stunned , he hadn’t seen her since she was 16 . Vaur finished his talk with Malak abruptly and walked away with her . From then on they where always together , in every fight and every experience . “Hey there , beautiful Sith Princess , what are you staring at in that dark pool”: said Vaur . She hadn’t noticed that he was looking at her for several minutes from out the dark hallway . She laughed , jumped up and ran into his strong arms .Then he spread out some thick warm cloths next to the fountain , tired of a long day she crawled and lay her next to him .

Feeling his slow reassuring hart-beat Ashaiya fell a sleep .

[Diego Varen]

You can't change the Thread title. Only Mods can. PM Jae Onasi about the subject and she'll gladly change the Thread title for you. Nice drawing and another good Part. Looking foward to more.

[CSI]

Is it the New Republic? It looks awfully similiar to the Jedi Outcast--I mean the illustration.

 

However, good chapter and good illustration! Keep going!

[Quanon]

@Nihilius : Don't know much about the time-line in star wars , but may story takes place before Kotor 1 , Revan is still alive and kicking as the great Dark Lord . Hope that help's and about the pics , Vaur is inspired by Desann , so yeah its kinda Jedi Outcast .

 

Thanks Pottsie for the info .

[Diego Varen]

Thanks Pottsie for the info .

 

No problem. Always glad to help someone. Usually. Desann wasn't the greatest character in the Jedi Knight series (That goes to Jerec, since he scared me when I was eight), but he had more character then Jaden, since he/she has no character to them and seem all godlike.

[CSI]

Ok, I got it. Thanks.

 

For timeline:

 

KOTOR series--Star Wars Movie Series--Jedi Outcast--Jedi Academy, which JO and JA are both New Republic. KOTOR is Old Republic.

[Diego Varen]

There is also Wookieepedia too.

[TSR]

Pottsie! Don't introduce him to that! It's fanon!

[Quanon]

Uh I used wookiepedia to get an idea what Hssiss looked like without to play TSL again . I use it for lots of things , well mostly for pic's and names .

 

@Pottsie : Yeah Dark Forces 2 was way better than the sequel thingies . If I rember correctly it was like the third game I bought for PC . To me Gorc and Pic where one of my favourites Dark Jedi . I just liked the look of Desann , I love reptiles / dinosaurs , they give nasty bites .

 

 

Ow and Thanks to Jae for changing my thread title .

[Diego Varen]

My favourite Dark Jedi was Yun, because he had a yellow Lightsaber (My favourite Lightsaber colour at the time) and he was the youngest. If they released Dark Forces II as a remake, I would buy it, since I can't be bothered to install it again.

 

I'm looking foward to more Chapters, by the way.

[Quanon]

Well , I'm working on it , and I have to entroduce a new character , the coloring of the drawings takes the most of the time .

And that blasted schoolwork

[CSI]

Well , I'm working on it , and I have to entroduce a new character , the coloring of the drawings takes the most of the time .

And that blasted schoolwork

 

Yeah, but a small error: "Entroduce", you should use "introduce", the correct form.

 

Keep up. No worries about word form error.

[Quanon]

Alread here's Part 3 , no drawings yet as I'm still figuring out what should be illustrated .

So it's only text for now , enjoy :

 

Edit : Alread this one of the pictures , hope its good .Also I tried to make the text less messy.

 

Edit2: Just added another drawing I made for the Dxun part .

 

PART3:

Dxun’s Green-hell.

 

“Wake up, Vaur . Come’on you lazy lazerhead.” Ashaiya said , while poking Vaur in his back . She could not sleep anymore and she was coming more anxious by the second with a feeling that the darkness around her would consume them both .

“Aaarrgh ! What’s you’re problem !” : snarled Vaur .

“ Don’t you feel it , it’s the Force , it’s trembling , … feels like dark swirling water … “ : she said , ignoring his complains .

“ What … Yes … strange why didn’t I feel it . Ashaiya are you okay ? “.

“ I … “ Her body shook heavly and gave a slight thumbing sound when it hitted the floor of the tomb . Vaur looked at her , picked her up and putted her back under the cloth . He stared at her , this was not the first time Ashaiya would feel the Force as this overwhelming darkness . She had never been the same since those battles on Dxun .

 

Ofcourse he wasn’t with her when Admiral Ghark Denson’s ship “The Swift Strider” crashed into the small moon , creating one of the largest craters on the surface .

Vaur could still see that great blazing fireball pouring through the sky , the impact shook the jungle moon to its knee’s , the sound and light was overwhelming . Everyone fighting just stopped for a minute and looked , even the wild-life was silent . On that moment he was sure she was dead .

 

 

 

Untill that fortuned day : “Look Jedi Master Vaur ! Its wreckage from one of the escape pods of the T.S.S. !” .

“ Amazing , good work Commander Helsan , spread out the squads , let them search the immediate area around the wrack .” : said Vaur with a low raw voice .

“Yes , Master.” Helsan turned around and informent all squads . The rain poured hard that day ,made everything slippery and the mud deeper . Vaur took the lead of the squad “Green Hikers” , some of the finest scouts and rangers of the Republic army . After hours of walking through the thick rainforest and constant climbing they stopped .

“ We'll have to make camp here Sir , the weather is only getting worse , we better stay in the shelter of the jungle canopy then going up any further . I just hope those tracks we found don’t wash away completely by that damned rain . ” Vaur looked grim and turned his head up , the rocky cliff rose up above them and got the full load of the rain , the wind swirling and beading around its teeth peaks . Later that night , he felt a strange calling sensation , not sure if it was the Force or his own instincts he got up and continued to climb the cliff .

 

The rain drizzled down on the scaly head of Vaur , he’s robe was soon soaked , cold and heavy , but this wouldn’t stop him , it didn’t even bothered him . Then , in a split second his foot slipped of a rock , sending him tumbling and rolling down from a steep hill , crashing throw shrub , veins and finannly knocking his head hard against a green stone pillar . Not knowing how much time has passed Vaur woke up just next up to Ashaiya in what looked like a meditation room of a Jedi Temple . Not far from him sat Admiral Ghark himself , shivering and talking to himself .

“ Admiral , what are you doing here ! “ . To his own surprise Vaur noticed how weak and faint his voice sounded .

“ Admiral !” : screamed Vaur . Ghark looked up and nodded “No” with his head , his hands giving gesture that Vaur should be silent . Vaur looked suspicious at the admiral not understanding what was going on . Then he looked at Ashaiya , she looked fine , just ripped and torn clothes , nothing serious , just for that iron collar around her ankle . “ What chains !” . Then Vaur saw a vague vision :” Mandalorians .“

”Yes that must have been what happened , they’re prisoners . But why , they never took war-prisoners . Only … when they needed information badly and that would mean they were losing the war . “ thought Vaur .

As what seemed an eternity , he , Ashaiya and admiral Ghark where freed by the Green Hikers . The fight itself was heavy as Mandalorians where fierce fighters in close quarters . Not only where their a lot of them , the prison or better the temple ruin was a big complex , a real maze . After long hours of intense hand to hand fighting , they could take a rest in a small side Hall .

 

 

And their they had found these old holocrons , from then on they learned everything they could about these ancient artefacts . Even after the battle on Dxun they returned to the jungle temple uncovering its secrets . But as the war continued they had to leave Dxun . Now 5 years later , those awful days on Dxun still had their effects on Ashaiya .

Vaur sighted , she was still trembling , making torn , tortured faces . He putted his clawed hands on her forehead and concentrated . Quickly a healing and calming Force stream flowed from his hand . The shaking stopped and Ashaiya looked more calmed now , not short after that she rose up . She looked at Vaur , “ You’re right , this is the Tomb . I saw us , somewhere deep , talking to this figure , I can’t remember what it was …”: whispered Ashaiya .

[Diego Varen]

Another good Part Quanon. Looking foward to the illustration, if it is done. Looking foward to more.

[Jae Onasi]

Hello Quanon.

You have a nice little story going. I'd like to make a suggestion or two just to improve readability here on the forum--add line spaces between each person's dialogue, and between each new paragraph. It gives the eye something to 'grab onto' when you drop down to the next line. When text is all bunched up together, it's easy to lose one's place and end up skipping lines. Try that out--I think you might be surprised at how much faster it allows you to read the story.