[fic] A Dark Path

[HIGH ON PIE 14]

An good addition BFA. Don't worry about it being rushed...you've read my fic, now that stuff is rushed. I like the addition, made it more realistic. Honestly it was not too rushed IMO. A bit, but a bit is okay.

 

Hehe, those last two sentences were funny. I like the new addition to the crew. I'm interstested as to where you will go with Elise. You did not go overbaord with the editing...I don't really edit at all...kudos to you. There is nothing wrong with editing, in fact editing is a good thing, it makes stories loads better...but I'm too lazy to do it. Way to not wimp out like me.

 

~HOP

[JediAthos]

So, I just finished reading everything you have here so far and I really like it. It seems to me that both Revan and his daughter are very much tetering on the edge between light and dark. It will be interesting to see which path they both end up on and how they get there.

[The_Catto]

Chapter Seven: Deadly Innocent

 

 

 

Revan breathed in heavily and sat down in the Main Hold of the Ebon Hawk. The day’s events had taken a toll on him and the fact that he had not had any proper sleep for at least a week made him even more tired by just thinking about it. He forced himself to his feet and went into the cockpit.

 

Elise was sitting in the co-pilots seat staring out into the swirling

tunnel of Hyperspace. Her face was blank yet her eyes screamed with emotion. A tear slid down her face and fell on to her shoulder. She quickly wiped the trail of wetness off her cheek however when she noticed Revan was standing behind her. She stood up and smiled.

 

“You don’t have to act strong in front of me,” Revan said. “I understand what you are going through,”

 

“I just left my friends to the assault of a tyrant and no doubt the people who I was closest to are going to be punished. Most likely killed!”

 

“Even though you do not see it, this was the right path for you to choose,” said Revan placing a caring hand on her shoulder. “If it was not for you, Aleira and I would be dead. We are in your debt, Elise; a debt I intend to see repaid.” She closed her eyes and sighed. When she looked back up at Revan, her gaze and posture had become once again, calm.

 

“That’s more like it,” replied Revan smiling. He looked around and realized something. “Where is Aleira?” he asked.

 

Elise looked around also. “I’m not sure.”

 

Revan left Elise to tend to the Cockpit and he walked in and out of every room of the ship until he reached the Cargo Hold. Aleira was in there training with the double-ended practice staff. Sweat was completely pouring down her face and the look she wore was disturbing. Her eyes were completely focused, frowning and were on fire. There was something glinting in eyes that made Revan uneasy.

 

“Aleira,” he said slowly. It was as if she didn’t hear him. She just continued to spar with her invisible opponent. Switching blades and styles so fast that Revan himself was sure that he could not have blocked them all. “Aleira!” he said more loudly.

 

She stopped and looked at him, breathing fast. “Yes?” she asked.

 

“What are you doing?” asked Revan.

 

“I am training,” she stated.

 

“I can see that,” replied Revan. “Why?”

 

“Because,”

 

“Because why?”

 

“Because I want too,”

 

“That’s not a proper answer Aleira.”

 

“Fine!” she said. Revan cocked up an eyebrow. He remembered back to Botiu’s words. “You should watch her by the way. I have realized that she is not exactly as she seems.” He knocked that thought back however. This was his twelve year-old daughter; not a mindless killing machine. “I need to train because I know what’s back there, on that planet! If I don’t, then we could all die. I need to help you! I don’t want you to die like Mother!” she added. She fell to her knees and started to sob. Revan walked over to her and knelt in front of her.

 

“I will not die,” he assured her. “I told you that back in that cell and I will tell you now.”

 

“I just can’t help having these thoughts and dreams!” she yelled.

 

“What dreams?” asked Revan, softly.

 

She looked at him. “Fire,” she said. “Darkness. Ash. And every single thing that a nightmare can be made of.” Her eyes betrayed her fear and hurt, and that more than anything scared Revan. “I hear this voice start to whisper in my ear. It says … horrible things. Mean things. Evil things.”

 

“Come here,” he said softly, and he held Aleira. He felt her cling on to him in desperation. “Everything is going to be, OK,” he said. “I promise.”

 

Aleira let go of him and she looked into his eyes. “I hope so,” she said.

 

 

 

*

 

 

Revan looked behind him and noticed a small girl standing in the doorway. She looked at him and before he could do anything, she tore off down the hallway and out of sight.

 

Revan sensed something flying up behind him and ducked. Ka’azar’s lightsaber sliced the very tips of his hair and flew around the room and landed back in the Sith’s palm. Revan glared at him. Ka’azar smiled at him.

 

Jonas was walking around the edges of the room. Revan kept his whereabouts in his minds eye and continued to eye off Ka’azar.

 

“Amazing thing’s aren’t they?” asked Ka’azar. “Bugs,”

 

Revan lifted an eyebrow and stared at Ka’azar. “What do you mean?” he asked.

 

“They can do so many things and look so alike, but be completely different at the same time,”

 

Revan waited. Jonas was nearly in position. He only had to keep Ka’azar occupied for only a few more moments….

 

“There are no bugs around,” said Revan. “What difference do they make at this time?”

 

“All the difference,” replied Ka’azar. “All the difference,”

 

“I think you’re just delusional,” replied Revan.

 

“I’m also a realist,” sneered Ka’azar.

 

Revan lifted his lightsaber up high when he received the ‘OK’ sign from Jonas through the Force. “Realty can be a lot different than our imaginations,” he said. Jumping forwards, Revan sensed Jonas taking Ka’azar by surprise, and Revan leaned more into his final attack; ready to end this once and for all.

 

 

*

 

 

Revan and Jonas sat aside each other in the cockpit of the Ebon Hawk. They sat there silent, not saying the words that did not need to be said. They sat there, in peace. Although, that’s what it seemed.

 

Revan’s mind was racing. His heart was aching to see Bastila once again and their daughter, whom they had named Aleira. But his mind was also troubled. He once thought himself able to live in the galaxy by accepting his past. Accepting the things that he had done to the countless innocents whom he had slaughtered, all in the name of a New Republic. In truth, he knew in the back of his that the threat to the galaxy was not the True Sith themselves, but it was him. Revan himself was the threat. This knowledge made him scared to think of what he might’ve done if he had gone through with his plans as the Sith Lord.

 

“What is it Revan?” asked Jonas. “I can feel you anger and fear through the Force. It feels like your screaming at me to listen. What is it?”

 

Revan looked to Jonas and frowned slightly. Both of them had grown in the past few months. And horribly, their faces and posture had mirrored that growth.

 

His skin was losing colour, turning to a deathly shade of grey. Veins could be seen faintly, pulsating in his neck and hands. A yellow tint had taken form in his eyes. Revan noted to himself to check later if he looked as bad as Jonas did. “I’m just … thinking,” he answered.

 

“About what?”

 

“Everything.”

 

“You’re going to have to be a little bit more specific than that!”

 

“Well, Jonas,” said Revan. “Do you ever think back to the Wars we had waged? The countless we have killed?”

 

“All the time,” replied Jonas. “It was not something we could control Revan,”

 

Revan cocked up an eyebrow.

 

“Well,” continued Jonas, “you did things, I did things, that – at first – we had a voice in the back of our head that kept on screaming at us to stop. It was wrong. But we had to do it. If we didn’t … well … we would all be speaking Mandalorian right now, as I have said many a time. But we learned to shut that voice out. Even though we still knew it was wrong, we did what had to be done.”

 

“How can you still live with knowing that?” asked Revan.

 

“I manage,” answered Jonas, looking out the cockpit. ‘Hyperspace always brought out the sentimental side of beings,’ he thought to himself.

 

“But how?” insisted Revan.

 

Jonas turned back to Revan. “Because I learned long ago to accept that I will never be able to forgive myself for the things that I have done. You can spend the rest of your entire life trying but even though others tell you that they forgive, that is more for themselves to accept it, not for yourself. The hardest thing any one being can do in their life is to accept themselves for who they are, and also knowing that that day will never come.” He sat back in his chair and closed his eyes.

 

Revan continued to ponder over Jonas’s words for the rest of the entire trip…

 

 

* * *

 

 

Sitting on the Med Bay bed, Aleira looked down at her feet. She had taken to the habit of going everywhere bare feet. It made her feel more at home on the ship and everywhere else she and her father travelled; she always walked without shoes on Dantooine.

 

“I wonder if I will ever see any of my friends again,” she said softly to herself.

 

“Friends are for the weak,” she heard in reply.

 

Aleira clenched her jaw.

 

“No they are not!” she said angrily. “And stop messing around in my head. I hate it; I hate you; I hate everything!”

 

“Use! It!” replied the voice. “Kill Jonas! Take the revenge you so desperately cleave to and kill him!”

 

“I get the feeling that Dad does not want me to kill him,” said Aleira.

 

“He is scared of what you can become: how powerful,”

 

“I’m scared,”

“Turn that fear into hatred and intertwine it with your lust to see justice,”

 

“Stop being melodramatic,”

 

“Stop being such a child,”

 

“Shut up,”

 

 

*

 

 

“Where are we heading anyway?” asked Revan.

 

“I only knew one set of coordinates,” answered Elise. “And that was Korriban,”

 

“Naturally,” scoffed Revan.

 

Elise looked at him.

 

“It seems that whenever I try to get away from Korriban and stay away, I always end up back there,” he added.

 

Elise smiled. “Well, we can stop and change destination if you wish,”

 

“No,” said Revan. “However,” he said. “I am wondering as to why you knew those coordinates?”

 

“Botiu used to send scout ships there over the years,”

 

“Used to?” asked Revan. “Why the past-tense?”

 

“Well, there’s nothing left there but rock and dried blood,” she said. “Botiu did not find that very useful,”

 

“Indeed,” said Revan, nodding his head in mock thought. “I can see why he would think that,”

 

Elise laughed, then stopped and looked at Revan.

 

“What?” he asked.

 

“It is just, unusual,” she replied. “The last time you were on Deria, I tried to kill you, and now I’m sitting here talking and laughing with you,”

 

“So it does have a name?” asked Revan.

 

“What does?”

 

“Your home planet,”

 

“Yes,” she said. “Ever since I can remember that is what we have called it. Perhaps sometime I will tell you a little of the history there?”

 

“If we have time,” nodded Revan. “Sure.”

 

“I would not mind exploring the tombs however,”

 

“Well, there’s not much to see but we can if you like.”

 

 

 

 

 

“Aleira,” called out Revan. “Where are you?”

 

No answer.

 

He walked down the corridor and proceeded into the Main Hold.

 

“Aleira!” he cried out again.

 

There was a soft thump, then quick padding feet coming up towards him out of the darkness of the Med Bay.

 

“What were you doing?” he asked.

 

“Nothing,” she said. “Just thinking,”

 

Revan nodded. “I’ve been doing that a lot myself lately.”

 

“Oh?”

 

“Yeah,” answered Revan. “Listen, I know its been a rough couple of weeks and I am sorry for that. I will try and make it up to you soon though.”

 

“How?” asked Aleira.

 

“Well,” he said slowly. “I was thinking about the Kath Pup that you wanted to bring along but did not have a chance to get before we left,”

 

Revan could see her eyes start to light up and that made him smile.

 

“Let’s get a Kath Pup,” said Revan.

 

She ran up to him and hugged him. “Thank you father!” she said.

 

“Nothing to it,” he replied. They walked to the Cargo Hold to train.

 

“Today I will teach you something that has helped me out of a LOT of sticky situations,” said Revan.

 

“What is that?” asked Aleira, looking up hopefully.

 

Revan looked down at her and gave her a lopsided grin. “Charm,” he said.

 

 

*

 

 

He ran down a corridor and sped into a doorway on the side. His heart was racing with excitement. He turned and ran towards the operating console in the corner of the room. He keyed in the password and unlocked the main menu.

 

 

1. Satellite

2. Weapon System

3. Shield

4. Other

 

He clicked in five and a sub menu popped up. He downloaded the schematics of the planet and looked down at the largest mountain on the landmass he was on.

 

His spirit soared when he spotted a small grey area painted on the very tip.

 

Jonas took out of the room and raced to the hanger. Satisfaction at last!

 

 

 

Revan jumped out of bed. With the idea of sleep pushed away he raced to the cockpit to find Elise dozing in the pilot's seat. She jumped in surprise however Revan poked her awake. “What is it?” she asked alarmed.

 

“Jonas,” he said. “I know where he is!”

[Darth_Yuthura]

I never imagined Revan having an offspring, but you have come up with a very interesting relationship between the two of them. He clearly loves her, but that his perception of the galaxy through sith eyes makes him believe that he must be hard on her to make her stronger. This is not a fiction I could easily do myself, so I'm interested in seeing where Revan goes and what he thinks.

 

A few grammar errors with commas were found. The second last paragraph could be combined into one sentence. "With the idea of sleep pushed away, Revan jumped out of bed and raced to find Elise in the cockpit." As it stands now, you could also replace 'and' with 'he.' My advice would be to try to avoid commas unless you MUST have them.

[Endorenna]

Again I ask...WHERE'S THE NEXT CHAPTER!!!!! HE JUST FOUND THE EXILE, YOU CAN'T LEAVE US HANGING THERE!!!!!!

 

(sigh) Oh, well. I've done worse to my beta-reader. Man, now I know what I've been putting her through...

[The_Catto]

@Darth_Yuthura: I totally did not see that! I just re-red what I wrote about Revan jumping out of the bed and I was like, " ... Uhh ...... What?" I even have no idea how I wrote it like that. Changed, fix, done and done! Cheer's for that.

 

@Endo: Haha, you're paying me back aren't you?

Haha, I'd do the same thing!

 

The next chapter? Well ... I kind of have to start it first But .. hopefully in a week or two. [Have a busy schedule coming up. Have to practice for a gig]

[Rabish Bini]

Hooray, another chapter, very interesting, although what I was gonna say was already said, I also really like the "suspense factor" you put into the end of every chap, adds some character, for lack of better word

[HIGH ON PIE 14]

Forgive my lateness.

 

This was a good chapter. My favorite aspect was how you desribed Aleira's struggle with the voice, and how Revan saw a hint of the darkside within her. You have done a good job of making Revan a father figure without making him into a goody-two shoes. That takes a careful balance me thinks. As DY said, Revan and Aleira's relationship is interesting what with Revan trying to make her strong yet knowing he is hard on her.

 

Also, I felt the dialogue flowed nicely.

 

Excellent job here BFA!

 

P.S. Damn you and your suspense!

 

~HOP

[The_Catto]

As said by HoP: Forgive my lateness. I was hellbent busy for a few weeks, and with toncilitus it's been hectic. Hopefully this chapter doesn't seem a bit too rushed or anything. I don't think it's my best chap yet, but its still an alright addition to the story. But hey, that's my opinion, I'll wait and see you all think of it

 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Chapter Eight: Old Comrades

 

 

“You know where he is?”

 

“Yes! But we have to leave now.”

 

“Are you sure you know where he is?”

 

“If you ask me that again -,”

 

“OK, OK. Let’s go then. It’s not as if I wanted to go and explore the tombs anymore anyway.”

 

Revan and Elise were eyeing each other though they both knew what was going to happen. Elise wanted to go and explore Korriban, but she also knew that Revan was the captain of the ship and if it were not for him, she would still be back at Deria. She stood down and placed the co-ordinates Revan told her.

 

“What planet is this?” she asked.

 

“Telos,” replied Revan. “It is a little unorthodox for where Jonas to go, but that is where he has went nonetheless.”

 

It was then that Aleira walked into the room looking curious. “What’s going on?” she asked Revan.

 

“I know where Jonas is,” replied Revan.

 

Aleira’s eyes widened in surprise. “Where is he?” she asked.

 

“Telos,” repeated Revan. “We’re on our way there now.”

 

“Do you know exactly where on Telos?” asked Elise.

 

“That’s why we’re are making a quick stop to visit a certain Admiral,”

 

* * *

 

 

“Well I be a Cannoks uncle!” exclaimed Carth. “I was wondering when the next time I would see you again, my old friend.”

 

Revan smiled slightly. “It has been a while, Carth.”

 

“Too long!” said Carth as they shook hands.

 

“Listen,” said Revan. “Is there somewhere we can talk?”

 

Carth looked at Revan and it was only when he noticed Aleira and Elise standing behind Revan, he nodded and led them to his apartment block over on the TSF designated area of Citadel Station.

 

They each sat on a cushiony chair and took a glass of water from Carth. He sat down and looked towards the beautiful young woman that sat in front of him. “I don’t believe I’ve had the pleasure of even knowing your name, yet I’ve brought you into my home!”

 

She smiled. “I am named Elise. I am a friend of Revan’s.”

 

Carth nodded and looked back to Revan. “I take it this is not going to be a long stay for you?”

 

Revan nodded sadly. “No,” he said. “I’m sure you have gotten my message concerning what happened?”

 

“You mean Bastila dying?” replied Carth.

 

Revan noticed the small amount of bile in his voice. “Look,” he said. “I didn’t have enough time to come and tell you in person. There were other things that had to be done,”

 

“Fine,” said Carth. “I’m sure there was. But still, it just seemed a little, impersonal to receive a message instead of seeing you both after the tragedy.” He looked to Aleira. “You look so much like your Mother,” he noted. She smiled slightly and her cheeks flushed. Carth looked back up at Revan. “ I feel that you have come here for a reason. What is it?”

 

“Jonas is here.”

 

Carth blinked. “Jonas?” he asked. “The Exile? Here on Telos?”

 

“Yes,” said Revan.

 

“Have you noticed any changes in the Restoration Zones around here?”

 

“No,” replied Carth. “Everything is as its should be.”

 

“Not even tiny fluxuations in the shields? Anything like that?”

 

“No,”

 

Revan sighed.

 

“Can I go down there?” he asked.

 

“Not legally,” replied Carth. “We still have a lot of work to do down there. The Ithorians have done brilliantly and Bao Dur’s Shield Network is growing extensively, yet there is still no availability for proper clearance for civilians. No matter who they are. Time has been slow these past years, despite the major progress. I cannot help you. I’m sorry, Revan.”

 

Revan nodded sympathetically. “I understand.”

 

Carth stood and walked over to his desk that sat – ironically – next to the bar. He started to fiddle with the computer there and suddenly the lights dimmed to an ominous glow. “I just turned off the security,” he explained.

 

Carth walked back over and sat down. “If you want to get down there so badly why don’t you just Force Persuade yourself down there?”

 

“I didn’t think you’d like the idea of me influencing your workmates like that,” admitted Revan. “Hence why I didn’t do it.”

 

“In the case of finding Jonas and getting him to tell me how he got down there in the first place, I will make an exception,” said Carth looking out the window. Revan could tell that there was less truth in that then Carth was willing to admit.

 

Carth stood back up and walked to his desk. After a few minutes of fiddling around he looked back up to the three of them and said. "I've deleted the last few minutes of recording. Just act normally,"

 

They all nodded and the lights grew back to their original flare. "How have you been Revan?" asked Carth casually.

 

"Not bad," replied Revan, playing along ...

 

 

 

*

 

 

Revan, Aleira, Elise and Carth all sat in the Main Hold of the Ebon Hawk. It

was decided, because of the security in Citadel, that it would be best if they met up here and discussed their plan.

 

“I will come down with you,” said Carth. “It will be easier to obtain a craft of some kind if the need arises.”

 

Revan nodded, then looked to Aleira. “Is there any place where she can stay, Carth?”

 

Before Carth could answer however, Aleira jumped up cried, “I am NOT staying up here whilst you go down to the planet and fight Jonas. I am NOT!”

 

“It is too dangerous,” replied Revan.

 

“I don’t care!” said Aleira fiercely. “I am going with you and there is nothing that can do to stop me!”

 

Revan looked at his daughter. Her outbursts had been growing more regular now that they had escaped Deria. And he was growing more and more impatient with each one.

 

“You will do what you are told,” he said.

 

“Aleira, your father is right,” said Carth consolingly. “You are a warrior, but not nearly strong enough to even think about going against Jonas.”

 

Aleira glared at them both and sat back down and folded her arms angrily.

 

Even though I know how well she can fight, Revan thought to himself, I still sometimes forget that she is but a child.

 

“Carth is right,” he said out loud. “And I will not have you die on me as

well. I will never be able to forgive myself.”

 

Aleira didn’t say a word. Revan shook his head sadly then looked back to Carth. “When can we go?” he asked.

 

“Whenever you are ready,” replied Carth.

 

Revan nodded. “Then let’s go,” he said.

 

 

*

 

 

Revan and Carth dropped Aleira and Elise off at his apartment block. Elise said that she would stay with Aleira to keep her company. After Elise saving his and his daughters lives, he had begun to trust Elise more and more the longer they journeyed together. Carth still had his reservations, naturally.

 

He didn’t like himself for having to leave Aleira here, angry, but she must learn that he is still her father and he knows what’s best for her. And if he had to choose between letting her witness a kill, whether it be his own death, or Jonas’s, or staying safely in Carth’s apartment block with Elise then he knew which he would choose.

 

Him and Carth reached the docking station and walked up to the officer

in charge off transport between the citadel and the restoration zones.

 

“I wasn’t notified you would be coming down here admiral,” he stated, looking from Carth to Revan. “What is the meaning of this?”

 

Revan stepped forward and used the Force to impress the meaning and the false truth down of his words into the man’s mind. “We’re here to see about a problem that has risen in the shield network. If our calculations are correct and something is not done immediately, the shields could fail. We only just found out so that is why no one was able to contact you. We both came down here as quick as we could.”

 

The man nodded groggily. “Yes. That explains it,” he said. “Very well. Sorry about that Admiral Onasi! Please, go through and correct that problem! We wouldn’t want to lose all our effort!”

 

“No, we wouldn’t” said Carth smiling slightly. Revan could tell the contempt in his words, despite how hard he tried to conceal it. “Thank you, officer.”

 

“My pleasure!” replied the officer as Revan and Carth made their way through the hold and walked towards the small cargo ship that sat there.

 

“No Hyperdrive,” said Carth as they boarded the ship and raised the boarding ramp. “But it will get us down and back up.”

 

Revan nodded.

 

They took their seats in the cockpit and Carth ignited the engines bring the ship off the ground and turning the nose around until they flew straight out of the hanger bay. They journeyed through traffic until the reached the lane they could take that would take them down into the restoration zones. Revan unconsciously knowing that his hand was placed atop the hilt of his lightsaber as they traveled.

 

 

*

 

 

They reached the surface of Telos and Revan stepped out onto the grass. There was a faint wind that rustled its way throughout the plains and slashed across his face. Carth followed suite and stood beside Revan. “I am sorry about how the events have turned against us these past few years, Carth.”

 

Carth looked to the sky. “It’s fine Revan,” he said. “I’m just glad to see you again. As I said, it has been too long,”

 

Revan nodded. “And I am sorry I was not able to come to you after Bastila’s death. My heart was filled with hate and I took off after Jonas. It was a mistake. Especially what I put Aleira through. I was such an idiot: constantly attuned only to my own feelings. Not what she must have been going through.”

 

“You do not need to apologize to me old friend,” replied Carth, looking at him. “But you do have to apologize to Aleira.” Revan nodded once again.

 

“Not to sound too sentimental,” started Revan. “But, hey, I missed you Carth. Ever since what happened between the raiders, what with Zaalbar and the riff between Mission and I widening, it’s been a rough few seasons.”

 

“So, I take it you and Mission are yet to talk?”

 

Revan looked around the plains. “I haven’t tried as hard as I should’ve but, no. We’re yet to talk. I think she still blames me for his death.”

 

“She’s a tough woman,” replied Carth. “You’re no more responsible for Zaalbar’s death than you are for Bastila’s.”

 

Revan said nothing.

 

A few minutes passed where they checked their supplies and made sure their COM’s were on the same frequency, and then they stood next to each other looking around.

 

“How about we split up?” asked Carth. “If you come into any trouble, you can just Force your way out. And I won’t get asked any questions so how about that?”

 

Revan started towards the far shoreline that presented itself in the distance. “Sure,” he said. “COM me if you need anything!”

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

It had been a long while since Revan had been on the surface of the planet Telos. It had changed. Not because of the slaughter from the Sith, but from the nature of its core.

 

It was wounded. Stretched and sown into so many broken pieces that Revan realized just why Jonas must have come here. After Malachor V, Telos must seem like the perfect home for someone such as him. He walked along the beach and listened to the waves fall softly down. He loved it. It was something so different compared to his usual life of animosity.

 

He closed his eyes and listened out. Not just at the waves, but for Jonas as well. It was then that his stomach lurched.

 

He swung around, igniting his lightsaber as he went and brought it against the red blade of his old friend.

 

“Hello Revan,” said Jonas smiling. “I knew you would be able to find me. I knew it!”

 

Revan pushed Jonas backwards and sent a Force Wave in his direction. At the last instant, Jonas put up a Force Shield to protect himself. “Wait Revan! It is not what you think! I did not kill Bastila!” he cried.

[CommanderQ]

Great Job, Mr BFA! Excellent Work!

[Endorenna]

(force persuade) You will write the next chapter now.

 

Liked it, BFA!

 

Zaalbar died?!?!?!?!?!? Yes!!!!!! I'm just sad that Mission has to deal with it. I like her.

 

All-in-all, pretty good! So, ya gonna kill Carth too? Then the three out of four annoying characters from K1 will be gone!

[CommanderQ]

HA! A new place to be the ever annoying reader! Bwa-ha! You will never escape the apprentice! Write! As Endorenna has said!

[The_Catto]

Haha, I'm writing, I'm writing!!!

Yeah, Zalbaar died. I noted that in the first chapter. Or second.

One of them anyway.

 

Don't know about Carth, lol. I happen to like his character. Despite the annoying, whiny side.

 

Started next chapter. Hopefully be out in the next couple of days.

[HIGH ON PIE 14]

A new chapter, wheeeee!

 

This was a good addition BFA. So Mission and Revan not talking? She'll come around I think. But I feel bad for her. I had a feeling Jonas was innocent. I think this was a great plot advancing chapter. You know, I didn't like Carth much in the game, but your fic makes him much more likeable. Maybe I'll give him another chance next playthrough.

 

Yes, write BFA, write - or Endorenna and I will send Gina after you...and trust me it will not be pleasant.

 

And on that note...looking foreward to the next chapter!

 

~HOP

[The_Catto]

Nooooo! Not Gina!!!!

I'll make sure to have the next chapter up, ve-HE-he-HE-eeeery soon then!

 

I only liked Carth when he was fighting and not thinking I was going to betray after every thing I said, or everything I did. I'm just trying to give him a little more laid back persona. So in other words, I'm making him less annoying.

 

 

EDIT: Okie dokie: Some news on the front.

 

A lot of things have been going on during the last couple of weeks and I have had less and less time to write. Plus, on top of that, whenever I DO get to write, my mind is completely jumbled. So, a little bit of a block as to what to write next, so the next chapter may take a little longer than first anticipated.

 

Just thought I would let the people who are interested in the continuation of this fic know that it has not come to a complete stop and will not be writing any more to it, its just ... come to a sort of stop for now, but will have some more up whenever I can.

 

Sorry peoples!!!!

[Endorenna]

Darn you, BFA! HOP, get Gina fired up!

 

No matter where you run, she'll find you!!!!!!

 

[The_Catto]

lol, blame my mates. It's their fault. All of this scheduling practices whenever I have other things to do! Haha.

I promise I will have it out as soon as I can.

So, for now ... can you PLEASE leave Gina where she is? Please, please, pleasE????

 

 

[HIGH ON PIE 14]

Hmmm...she says she is still computing the answer...I'd warn my friends though...she might come after them for hindering progress. She had a very kill-happy look in her eye.

 

Gina: BFA, the readers are waitng for an update.

 

BFA: I'll have it up soon.

 

Gina: Your making this difficult...that is not an astral thing to do.

 

:xp: :xp:

 

In all seriousness, take your time...you've got so many fics going here, I don't know if your very brave or very crazy (or both )

 

~HOP

[The_Catto]

you've got so many fics going here, I don't know if your very brave or very crazy (or both )

 

Haha, it's most likely both, or leaning more over to the 'crazy' side

[The_Catto]

OMFG!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes .. I've actually managed to put something up ... But with all what's been going on, I've just added bits whenever I could so I don't know if it's up to scratch or not ... I'll let Gina edit it for me if she's up to the task

 

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Chapter Nine: A Conspiracy Unmasked

 

 

Revan stopped mid swing, but did not lower his defences.

 

“What did you just say?” he whispered.

 

“I did not kill Bastila!” Jonas repeated. “You know me! I could never have killed her!”

 

“You’re a liar!” snarled Revan. “You killed her, and now I am here to kill you!” He brought his blade down and around and swiped at Jonas’s legs. The Exile leapt through the air and landed behind Revan.

 

“Stop, Revan!” he shouted. “Please, let me explain!”

 

“What could you possibly have what I want to hear?” Revan shouted.

 

“The truth!” said Jonas in a sort of obvious way. In answer to his own statement, Jonas deactivated his lightsaber and tossed the hilt to Revan, who caught it warily. Jonas sat down, cross-legged. “Now, I am defenceless,” he said. “I know you are not in the way of killing a helpless opponent, so please, hear me out.”

 

Revan never switched the blade off as he looked at Jonas. Something was different about him. He could not define what it was, but he was indeed different since their last meeting. “Speak,” said Revan.

 

Jonas took a breath. “It is true I was there when Bastila was killed. And it is true I fled from Dantooine, but it is not for the reason to which you think it is. If you give me enough time, I will tell you the entire tale. And then you can decide for yourself whether or not you trust me,”

 

Revan thought for a moment. It was possible that Jonas was just trying to trick Revan. Into giving him a false sense of security, before he set his trap, but Revan also took into the account – no matter how slim the chances seemed – that Jonas might be actually telling him the truth.

 

He nodded, and Jonas seemed to relax slightly. “Right,” he said. “Well, I’ll begin a little bit before Dantooine…”

 

 

 

*

 

 

 

Jonas turned and walked down the small slope. The Forest of Dxun was humid and wet as usual. He hated it here, but nevertheless, this was something that he had to do. He had heard whispers: Whispers of something that was secretly travelling to each planet in the Republic where the dark side was strong. He was not sure why, or even what was happening but he intended to find out.

 

He was now travelling to a place where he himself had never been before, but a place where he had once sent some of his companions: The tomb of Freedon Nadd.

 

The last he heard, there was some activity happening around the tomb. Animals were turning even more ferocious than usual. And the Mandalorians that Canderous sent there had not returned, so he sent word to Jonas knowing that the Exile had former experience with the type of dark powers that surrounded themselves around the tomb.

 

And here he was. In front of a gigantic pyramidal temple, made completely from black durasteel. He walked up the long staircase that led to the doors. He had to duck slightly as to not hit his head, and walked in.

 

He proceeded down the long hallway until he reached a three-way fork. Taking the path that was straight in front of him, he walked until he was standing in a large chamber with even more exits to hallways beyond on each of the sidewalls. He continued to walk straight, through two large, menacing great doors and down into the room beyond. At the front lay a great pool. He noticed the sarcophagus in the background. There was the taint of the dark side everywhere in this tomb, but here it was the strongest. It took all of Jonas’s effort to stop himself from falling over due to the immense strength of it.

 

He walked around the room and explored every inch. From the reports he had received from Visas and the others, there were supposed to be pools of pure dark side energy situated in spots around the temple. But as he inspected every other room, he noticed that there was an eerie silence. The dark side was still here. It would never leave this planet, forever tainting the planets core, but the raw energies that could be visible, had dissipated. Something strange was at work.

 

 

 

*

 

 

 

 

Korriban was as desolate as it always was. A slight dry wind was rushing in and around the halls of the broken academy. Jonas stood silently in the middle of the entrance hall. The last time he was here, he was confronted by Darth Sion, but knowing that he was dead now made Jonas feel slightly less anxious. He gazed around and noticed something rather peculiar.

 

The door to the library was completely blown apart. Great chunks of the door were spread over the ground at the entrance. Jonas walked over and examined the remains.

 

“These are no ordinary blast marks,” he concluded, running his fingers over the black grooves. “Something big destroyed this door. Why anyone would do that is beyond me, it was opened the last time I was here.”

 

He stood to his feet and walked inside.

 

Mustiness floated in mid air. Specks of dust still floated in and around the room and the entire library itself gave off a sense of complete mortality. This place was completely dead. The same thing was happening here and as it had happened on Dxun. It was as if the dark side was being siphoned off to an entity unknown.

 

Jonas was strong in the dark side. Just as much as he was in the light: he walked neither path. The ideals of each side disgusted him too much to truly devote himself to either group. Some people described a person such as him to be a Grey Jedi, or a neutral piece in the ever-changing puzzle that which is the galaxy. But even that seemed too absolute for Jonas’s liking. He used the powers of both, but to stay neutral, he would have to restrict himself as to how far he would be willing to go in some areas. He had been restricted for most of his life; it was not something he wanted to continue being…

Jonas continued to walk through the hallways of the library. The shelves, which were once filled with hundreds of scrolls, datapads and books, were completely empty except for large piles of dust. He paced and looked in every spot in the Academy but could not find anything at all to even represent the fact that this place had once been a thriving outpost for the Sith. It was disconcerting.

 

He made the journey back through the Valley of the Dark Lords, stopping once to look at the entrance of the Shyrack Cave. Even there seemed distant. As if, there was a faint trace of energy that still lingered there, but its call was coming across a great distance. He shook his head and proceeded to the ship that he had been using.

 

He missed the Ebon Hawk.

 

 

 

*

 

 

 

Finally, he found something! A clue as to what had been happening to the planets that had been associated with being strong in the dark side.

 

He was on Nar Shadaa, sitting in an empty apartment room that lead off from the docks. He was studying a piece of parchment that he had bought off a dealer in one of the many back streets. It had a pictorial signature on it in the bottom left hand corner: A skull was at the top, a lightsaber hilt just below that. And at the very bottom, stood foundations of a building, surrounded by finely carved dead bodies. The rest of the paper was completely blank apart from a set of oddly familiar coordinates…

 

 

The ship pulled out of Hyperspace. The last time Jonas was here was not something he would like to remember. He flew down to the planet below and after the quick shudders from re-entry he landed in a small field just a few clicks from the large temple.

 

He lowered the loading ramp and stood out on the grass. It was then he realized something wasn’t right…

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

“Revan,” said Jonas. “We did not destroy the True Sith as we thought we did. They are regrouping and staging for a strike against us. Their thirst for revenge has reached a point to where nothing will be able to deter them from getting what they want: the destruction to the Republic.”

 

“I already know this,” said Revan. “I have been to Deria and seen what is happening there. I have met the son of Botiu.”

 

“Botiu?” queried Jonas. “Who is he?”

 

“He is the son of Ka’azar,”

 

Jonas shook his head. “No, no, no.” he said. “Ka’azar did not have a son.”

 

“He did, trust me Jonas. I have seen him,” said Revan.

 

“It’s not that I do not believe you Revan,” replied Jonas,” its just that I know you’re wrong. I say that he did not have a son because he had a daughter. She is the worst of all the Sith that reside on Deria. And by the strange coincidence that you actually happen to know that name is also a worry. Only the daughter of Ka’azar has ever called it by that name. It means the ‘Beginning of the End’.”

 

Revan stood stunned. “Are you positive?” he whispered. “Absolutely sure?”

 

Jonas nodded. “Of course. Why, what’s the matter?”

 

Revan didn’t answer. He automatically reached for his COM. “Carth!” he yelled into it. “Get back to the ship, we have to get back to Aleira and Elise. Now! I’ll explain on the way!”

 

There was a click of acknowledgment and Revan and Jonas took off. As Jonas followed Revan, he asked, “How could you not see through her façade? Elise is the strongest person I have ever known!”

 

“She hid it from me,” replied Revan. “Blast it! What have I done?”

 

They reached the ship and Carth was already inside starting up the engines.

 

“What the hell is going on Revan?” he asked. He then looked to Jonas. “What is he doing here?”

 

“Elise has deceived me,” said Revan. “I will explain on the way. Just get this ship moving!”

 

 

 

*

 

 

 

The flight back was extremely shorter than the first. Before even Revan could realize what was happening, he was sprinting through the Apartment Block until he reached the entrance to Carth’s room. He sprinted inside but stopped as he took notice of the room.

Aleira and Elise were nowhere to be seen. The table and chairs were upturned, and the bar was completely destroyed. Revan heard quickened footsteps behind him and ignited his lightsaber as he spun around.

 

“Wait, it’s just me!” said Jonas as he and Carth turned up.

 

“What happened to my room?” he asked. “Revan, what exactly is going on here?”

 

“Elise has kidnapped my daughter,” answered Revan. “And now I aim to get her back.”

 

“I will come with you,” said Jonas. “It’s time to finish this once and for all.”

 

Revan looked to Jonas. He lunged forward and grabbed him by the scruff of his collar, pushed and lifted him against the wall. “You will tell me what happened to my wife now!” he yelled. “Before I decided to gut you right here!”

 

“Revan!” croaked Jonas. “It was Elise. Elise killed Bastila! They captured me but I escaped and went to get your help. She followed me! I couldn’t do anything about it! I am sorry!”

 

“You fool!” shouted Revan. “They allowed you to escape you idiot! If it wasn’t for you, Bastila would still be alive!” He tightened his grasp on Jonas throat. Hate billowed in his heart and his eyes started to burn. Jonas’s face was becoming whiter by the second and his eyes were rolling to the back of his head.

 

“Revan!” cried Carth. “Let him go!”

 

Revan looked to Carth and slowly released his grip. Jonas fell to the ground.

 

He ignited his lightsaber and held it to Jonas’s throat. “You better pray to the Force that Aleira survives, otherwise you will not be able to see anything apart from my lightsaber through your stomach!”

 

Jonas looked at Revan. “By my life, Revan, I will swear to you I will help avenge Bastila’s death and to save Aleira. If not, then I will let you kill me. In any way you see fit.”

 

Revan deactivated his lightsaber and looked to Carth. “Is it still possible that they may be on the station?”

 

“I’ll check the records,” said Carth as he hurried over to the computer. After several seconds and numerous sounds of keys being typed, Carth looked up and said, “the Ebon Hawk is still here. But there has been many ships that have left within the hour. They could have been on any one,”

 

“Either way,” said Revan. “Elise knows that I will follow, so she will go back to Deria. That is where my path leads.”

 

“As does mine,” replied Carth. “No matter what you say Revan, I am still coming with you,”

 

Revan nodded. “Fine,” he said. “It will be good to have you come along. We are wasting time however. Let’s go.”

[Chevron 7 locke]

A very intense chapter...i liked the part where revan threatended to shove his saber through Jonas's gut

[The_Catto]

Cheers, Chev.

As I said .. I don't think it's up to the usual scratch that I like to have my chapters up to but it's better than nothing, me thinks.

[Endorenna]

I knew Elise couldn't be trusted! She was too nice for a Sith!

 

BFA, there are several more grammar mistakes than last time, mostly fragments, where your finger hit the period instead of the comma. Run through it once sometime, and you'll find 'em all, no problem. Still, the mistakes were so few and far between, it didn't detract from the story.

 

Thank you for the chapter, BFA! Now write the next one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE'S GOT ALEIRA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[HIGH ON PIE 14]

Cheers, Chev.

As I said .. I don't think it's up to the usual scratch that I like to have my chapters up to but it's better than nothing, me thinks.

 

I beg to differ. I thouroughly enjoyed this chapter. Throughout the whole story, I anticipated the Revan/ Jonas meeting, and here it is!

 

Unlike Endorenna, I didn't see this coming at all. I was wary if Elise, but kidnapping and murder?! The thought of Revan and the Exile teaming up - yay! I like the tension you put in here, I think Revan reacted perfectly. He was angry, but willing to listen, though understandibly impatient. I'm glad it's not a yay lets team up kind of thing, but more of just a common goal and Jonas' want for forgiveness.

 

NEXT CHAPTER

 

~HOP

[The_Catto]

Thank, HoP and Endo.

The idea for Elise being a traitor didn't come to me until the very last second and then I decided to chuck it in there to see how it would go.

 

I tried to place myself in Revan's shoes and wondered as to how I would react in that situation, and that's what I came up with.

 

Glad you liked it and the next chap is already underway