Jump to content

Home

I need a shoulder...


Recommended Posts

I think this past weekend has become my most depressing weekend of my life, even inspite the fact that Star Wars Episode 2 opened this weekend.

 

It actually started wednesday, when my friend called from Pittsburgh and offered me and my wife two free tickets to go with him to the Episode two midnight showing that night. Well, I immediately called my wife to ask her if she could go, and was informed by her that she wasn't feeling well at all... pregnancy stuff. Well, I had to decline the tickets, I wish it would have stopped there though...

 

Thursday came, and my wife felt about the same and called the OB, he said to take it easy. She did. He also said to call him if it gets worse. Well, friday came, and it got worse. She called his office and the nurse said the Doc was out of town for the weekend, go to the Emergency Room. So I went straight from work friday afternoon to the ER and met my wife there. After blood work, an ultrasound where the baby had no heartbeat, and that "womanly exam" the ER Docs informed us... My wife miscarried the pregnancy.

 

Well, they decided to give her medication to help her pass the baby, mind you, these are not OB's they are only ER docs. This causes my wife to go into labor... partly. When in fact she was incapable of passing the baby, and so she laid there with contractions that could go nowhere! Finally, at midnight they sent her home with some pills and said she'd finish at home.

 

Saturday and Sunday came and went and she was in immense pain physically and emotionly and yet the miscarriage went on. Finally Monday came and her OB was back in town, she called his office at 8:30 AM and they said he would get back to us. Well, 9:00 PM came and finally the Doc called us and said the ER F'd up, and he needs to see her pronto because she's probably going to need surgery.

 

My Wife has been miscarrying our baby for 6 days!!!! And she is a total wreck emotionally. Remember, we tried for 8 months solid to have a baby, we were going to have to see a fertiltiy specialist, but God intervened and gave us a pregnancy, but God has seen fit to take it away. This was my wife's FIRST pregnancy, to have it end this way is so disheartening, ESPECIALLY after trying so long for the pregnancy!

 

I have had to be strong, because my wife has needed me to be strong, but I lost my baby too! I wanted to be a daddy too! I haven't had a moment just to feel what I'm really feeling!

 

I mean, what am I supposed to say to my wife we she looks at me in tears and says "I want my baby back!" and "They took my baby away!". I can't cry, I can't say anything but "it will be ok" and "we'll just try again" to which she replies, "Why, so we can miscarry again!?".

 

I don't know, I'm sorry I'm cluttering up your board with my personal problems. I just don't know where to turn, or what I'm supposed to do. Do you know, my wife looked at me and said, "I've been flushing my baby for three days, how's that fair!!!?" And even though I can't say it... I'm thinking the same thing! I want our baby back!!!

 

please, pray for wife and I, this is really hard for us!

 

Sorry I went on and on...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 58
  • Created
  • Last Reply

I'm not old enough to feel exacty what you feel, but something happened like that once with my mom. She wouldn't walk and always was resting. Then one day I found allot of blood in the toilet bowl, and I asked my mom why it was there. She told me I could've been having a little brother, but he died. I was real sad. I'll pray for you guys, I know what it's like to lose someone very important:(

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am very sorry to hear about that... The same situation happened like Natopo except i don't know what I would have had. I didn't really feel anything considering I was young back then (11 at least).. Years later, my sister is born (Two years old now). The only thing I could say is that it may not happen again, although you problably don't want to hear that :(.

 

Regards,

Imperial Sardaukar

 

P.S. my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your wife tonight.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

HOLY S H I T!!!!!!! (sorry, I needed to say that somehow) Man, I have been through some painstaking things, so I know how you feel. I have been depressed badly, on the brink of sanity. I know how your wife feels, man. (Don't worry, I feel fine now) Havoc, get me some directions and I'll say it in person. Thrawn will come too.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Havoc, I can't express just how sorry I feel for you and your wife. You both will be in my prayers. I'll also be praying that you and your wife will be able to have a baby. One way or another.

 

I've never told anyone this before but, you guys know how I'm a twin? Well, we started out as triplets. My mother miscarried too and lost one of us. She didn't even know the two of us were left for quite a while.

 

Never feel bad about bringing your problems here, Havoc. Your and your wife's problems are our problems and we'll try and help you through this in any way we can.

 

 

Again, You'll both be in my prayers. I'm so sorry that you and your wife must go through this.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks guys,

 

Your prayers are really appreciated.

 

I guess it just that I've had to be strong so that my wife can cry on my shoulder and vent her frustration. But the problem is, I haven't been able to express my feelings. My family lives out of town, and so do all my friends. So I have been just bottleing up everything.

 

Last night my wife looked at me with tear sstreaming down her face and said, "I wish I could get over this like you, you haven't been upset over this!" But the truth of the matter is, I AM upset, I do feel like crying, but I have no one to talk to or lean on but my wife, and I can't do that right now, she's leaning on me! I feel so trapped, I want to scream, I want to ask the "why's", but there is no one there...

 

So I came to you guys, I still feel bad Rhett. I shouldn't be having pity parties on a Star Wars gaming forum, but I had no where else to turn. If I've said it once, I've said a thousand times: You guys have become like family, and right now...

 

I need family.

 

Thanks guys, you guys are truly the best. My wife is with the doctor now, I'm stuck at work! :mad: Pray the Doctor has some good news for a change, like maybe it won't require surgery!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm so sorry to here that. I'll be praying for you. And always just keep in mind that God has a purpose in everything, even this miscarriage.

 

My Aunt had 3 miscarriages before she had a baby, and now she has 3, so never give up hope, you will have your son or daughter at the proper time.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Heavyarms

come on, tell me how to get to Sharon! Me,dash, and Thrawn will come! (If dash decides to drive four hours to Pit :D)

 

I appreciate the thought, but now your just... freaking me out! ;)

 

j/k

 

Thanks Heavyarms, but I wouldn't want to waste your time, besides tonight's no good. Maybe thursday night! :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Man, so sorry to hear this. I'll be thinking of you.

 

My wife and I went through similar situations.

 

We've been married for six years. All that time, no baby. (though we had been trying)

 

We decided to adopt. Found out in order to adopt a little one we should become foster parents. So we did.

 

A year later we managed to gather up the $5000 needed to go to a fertility specialist. Did the treatments and everything we were supposed to. No luck. Just out $5000.

 

Next step up is $7000. Meanwhile my wife and I get so upset everytime we see a 12 year old in Wal-Mart with a baby.

 

Now. *fingers crossed* we are finally going to get to adopt one of our foster babies (we've had 7 in our house so far) We've had her since she was 6 months old and she is now 18 months. So we'll keep hoping. And maybe someday we can round up that $7000.

 

Again, I feel for you, and will be thinking of you.

 

KL

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Holy Cow, skip the forums for a week and stuff happens. I know what your going through. My sister miscarried twice before she succeeded but she wound up divorcing and I've only seen her and the kid once since then, but I heard they were getting better. I feel and pray for you man.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Sardaukar

One last thing to add which I have heard before.

 

God never closes one door and opens another (Grr! Something like that).

 

I think what you want is:

 

When God closes one door he opens another.

 

Always remember Havoc there is one person you can always lean on, and even when all seems hopeless he will still be right there by your side.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Heavyarms

HOLY S H I T!!!!!!! (sorry, I needed to say that somehow) Man, I have been through some painstaking things, so I know how you feel. I have been depressed badly, on the brink of sanity. I know how your wife feels, man. (Don't worry, I feel fine now) Havoc, get me some directions and I'll say it in person. Thrawn will come too.

 

How did you manage to feel better? Tell me please.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks guys, for your kind words. I'm sure that God had his reasons, and I stand behind that come what may.

 

Here's an update: The Doc says that my Wife is physically done with the miscarriage now, which means she can start the emotional healing process and we can start to put this behind us.

 

Rest assured campers, We will try again (Besides, that's the fun part! ;) ), and again...and again. As much as it takes, that what we'll do. I will have a kid, and they will see Episode 3 in the theaters! :D

 

But, seriously, I do feel much better already, and we're going to get through this, thamks to your kind words and your support!

 

Thank you!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Sardaukar

 

How did you manage to feel better? Tell me please.

 

 

A HELL of a lot of thinking, man. I thought about it for at least 5 months before I cracked the news to this girl, and then for about 5-6 months after.

 

A lot of thinking, eh?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Originally posted by Artoo

Holy Cow, skip the forums for a week and stuff happens.

 

no kidding, Artoo

 

Havoc, you aren't alone in this...I found out recently that my Grandmother had a miscarriage before my father was born (I'm 21 now and just found out). They went opn to have three strong boys.

Also, when my mother was pregnant, she experienced some bleeding and the doctor told my parents that she could lose the child...eventually it cleared up and the baby was born healthy. In case you haven't figured it out yet, it was me :). Don't give up hope.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.


×
×
  • Create New...