Sherack Nhar Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Why? Why does pain exist? Why can't there be joy without pain? Why IS there joy if we must endure such suffering? Why is it that when you hurt so deeply, you get the feeling that you're going to puke? Why is it that some questions have no answers? Why is it that some of your most beloved friends can lie to you and betray you? Why is it that they can suddenly disappoint you? Why is it that sometimes you get the feeling that the pain will never end? Why is it that the pain is so great that you don't want to commit suicide because there might be a chance this is all a misunderstanding? Why is it that the love of my life threw me away in a matter of minutes? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tie Guy Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 why not? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherack Nhar Posted September 10, 2002 Author Share Posted September 10, 2002 This would be an interesting answer if I wasn't currently crying out all the tears of my body. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boba Rhett Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Why not. To know when something is hurting you. Without pain, joy would not and could not exhist. Endless suffering would suck. Your diaphram is probably contracting because of the emotional distress. Knowing everything would be terribly boring after a while. I don't know. I don't know. Depression does that to you. Because there's never, or at least should never be a complete absense of hope. There will be others who you'll love just as much as you love them, sher. I know this sounds totally stupid but it's true. If there was no pain we would have no comprehension of what joy or anything like it was. It's one of the horrible beauties of life. In time, you will come to appreciate it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherack Nhar Posted September 10, 2002 Author Share Posted September 10, 2002 She will consider keeping in touch with me. I don't even know if that is good or bad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Feel free to PM me, Sherack. I'll help in whatever capacity I can. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherack Nhar Posted September 10, 2002 Author Share Posted September 10, 2002 Thanks Rogue Nine, maybe I will tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rogue Nine Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 I don't know the circumstances of your plight, Sherack, but from what I gather it is extremely hurtful to you, as such pain usually is. You're reeling right now, and nothing anyone can say will help. You're in pain and it is the worst kind of pain to experience. I say it truthfully when I say that I would endure the worst physical pain rather than emotional pain, especially of this nature. Rhett's right. There will be others who will love you as much, if not more. You'll just have to stay strong. Recover from your grief. I'm not telling you to do it immediately; that's really not possible. Just know that we're here for you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WolfmanNCSU Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Not to sound mean or anything, but you are still very young, with plenty of time to find other women. There is always other women. Just remember this as an experience. Life is full of em. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth_Rommel Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Holy shoot. That sucks, Sher. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Redwing Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 O.o I'm so sorry! I wish I could say something to help...but I don't have anything to offer but sympathy...and I hope things look up...and you know it's always darkest before dawn... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havoc Stryphe Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Well, this seems like familiar territory... Well Sherack, I'm not going to pelt you with your typical "feel better" clichés. But what I will do is tell you this. We are only human, sometimes the reasons why things happen to us is beyond our comprehension, even beyond our linear thought process. But because they do happen to us, does not make us any less of a person. You are not a freak, a loser, or any less desirable a person. Never forget that! Typically, at these times in our lives we are our own worse enemies. Dealing more emotional damage to ourselves than any girl could hope to. We take the situation and turn it into this ritual "beat-myself-up" session. You'll start to remember different times you had togethor and start wondering how you could have down things differently...better. Well, the fact of the matter is you couldn't have, to do things differently is to betray who you really are. Don't beat yourself up, if the relationship didn't work out, it simply was not to be. If the relationship had continued you'd both likely had been miserable 10 years from now. Having said that, you still have to grieve. For it is obvious she meant alot to you, and no one should try to rob you of that time. It is a natural process that must be attended, less you bottle you hurt up only to be unleashed at a later date in many other nasty forms. (i.e. headaches, fits of rage, ulcers, insomnia etc.) So, you must ask the questions "Why?" and work through the feelings. Just don't dwell on the "Why's". Because, as a friend, I'm telling you, there is nothing you could have done to stop this from happening, and you are no less a human being for having it happen. It's her loss, and in time, your gain! And as Rogue Nine said, if it gets too unbearable, or you have questions, than by all means, we are here for you. Don't hesitate to asks us to lend an ear. After all, you were there for me, I'd be a heartless bastard if I didn't return the favor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surfnshannon Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Sherack u sound soo sad Remember things always happen for a reason, and even though that reason may not seem clear now - in time it will. U will wonder why you ever waisted your time letting someone bring you down like this. I know everything there is to know (sorta) about being depressed. The one thing that helps me is to talk it out with people who know me - not just us forumers but friends, family whatever it takes to vent all this out. If you don't feel like talking go do stuff to distract yourself. I love to go to Gameworks and Dave and Busters and just BLAST the crap outta something. Good Therapy! But go do something fun and remind yourself that you were and always will be your own person. The person you lost did not define you, did not take anything away from you and that you will find someone to love yet again. blah blah i know i'm silly Seriously 15 boyfriends later and I found the man i'm going to marry. I love him dearly and wouldn't trade him for ANY of those other boyfriends EVER. He was worth the wait and the tears. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherack Nhar Posted September 10, 2002 Author Share Posted September 10, 2002 Thank you everyone, especially Havoc and STTCT. You two helped me a lot more than you think. I skipped college today. I didn't want to burst out crying in a class. I wouldn't be able to concentrate anyway. I'm going to hang around on MSN and AIM. I'm probably going to watch a DVD on my comp... maybe a comedy. Or a western. Something that doesn't have a crappy sentimental love story ala The Matrix. You guys are more important to me than the few real life friends that I have. I know it sounds pathetic, it may very well be, but that's how it is. You guys are my best support, and the only way I can get that support is to be in front of my computer, alone in my room. I feel so lonely. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havoc Stryphe Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Originally posted by Sherack Nhar ...I feel so lonely. Well you're in luck my friend, out of the plethera of emotions and feelings you're experiencing at this very moment, Lonliness is the one definate we can cure! Skipping class was probably the best thing...today. But don't let yourself become a prisoner to your feelings. It would probably be a good idea to get out of your dorm room tonight, if only for a few minutes of fresh air. Tomorrow, try to get out to classes, and while you're out, take in some of that beautiful canadian nature. Though I'm at work, I'll keep checking back to this thread and my PM's. So keep talking...I'm listening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Surfnshannon Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 hum what are my favorite westerns... Tombstone!! ooo val kilmer cracks me up as doc holliday (sp) Unforgiven Whats the one with Sharon Stone - kinda cheezy - but she kicks @ss. Comedys - Rush Hour Movies Shanghai Noon Happy Gilmore All around good movies minus sappy love saga Independence Day The one where kevin bacon goes crazy digging holes in his backyard Star Wars OT - hey there's a little love - but u can look at Leia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havoc Stryphe Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Originally posted by STTCT The one where kevin bacon goes crazy digging holes in his backyard I believe that was: Stir of Echoes and was a good movie! I have to agree with STTCT, Tombstone is the absolute best Western! Classic Comedies (Minus Romance): Monty Python and the Quest for the Holy Grail Caddyshack Ghostbusters Spaceballs (Just a little love, but worth it!) The Three Amigos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherack Nhar Posted September 10, 2002 Author Share Posted September 10, 2002 Well I opted to watch Jay & Silent Bob Strike Back, because the small love story in there was caricatured and not serious. I'm feeling a little better... During the movie I thought about what you two said and again, it helped a lot. By the way Havoc, there is no such thing as dorm rooms here, I'm at my house. Maybe I'll get some fresh air later today. Don't get caught browsing the forums while at work... I don't want you to get yelled at just because of me. It's not THAT important... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havoc Stryphe Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Hey, it's no biggie. I have my own office. I locked my door and no one can bother me. Besides, I don't have any real work to do at the moment. I'm all caught up! Well then, mister smarty pants, just replace "dorm room" with "home" and my advice still applies! Jay & Silent Bob Strikes Back was an excellent choice! You have chosen... wisely Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherack Nhar Posted September 10, 2002 Author Share Posted September 10, 2002 Right now, I want to forget. I want to forget everything that has happened in the last few months. I want to forget that there are girls out there, because they remind me of her (except those that are my friends, like STTCT). I want to forget that love exists. In fact, I kinda want to go back to childhood, back when those things didn't matter at all. ... Somebody do something about those ad banners, they don't help at all... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admiral Odin Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 The Greeks said it best: Women are a beautiful evil. (Greeks really frowned upon women, but I won't get into that). We all at one time or another want to go back to our childhood, when we didn't have to worry about a thing. Unfortunatly that is impossible. You are hurting, but looking into the past will not help. It seems that the pain will never end but eventually it will. You may not believe that but it is true, but it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Havoc Stryphe Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 about the banners Sher, I've been trying for how long now? Wish I could do more! Your childhood may serve as a tempory haven from the wounds of love, but eventually you will have to deal with the here and now. But for now rest easy my friend, love will leave you be for a time. But remember, love is like fate; Some day, it will happen, and you'll be powerless to stop it. Until that time, we are doomed, it seems, to somehow "make" our own fate. We seem content to think it is us who choose love, when in fact we have simply chosen companionship. Love comes of it's own design, and you can wait for her and embrace it willingly, or you can shelter yourself with the scars of your own past follies. So that when love comes for you, it is turned away in sorrow. To forget love, is simply not human, for love is entwined in the very fibers of our beings. But to rest in the knowledge that you have quit searching for love, that is best place to be. It is there you can step back and learn from our past. It is there we can observe teh world around us, and it is there where we can prepare our hearts for what fate has in store for us. Women are our bane as men, but by the same token our redemption. They may seem contrite, but it is their nature to keep us second guessing. But for now, you may seem content to second guess them from afar. Find solace in friendship, this is where your true haven exists. But remember, friends seem indoctrined with the desire to give counsel to those who seem in need. Even as I do so now, but be wary their tongue, for not all counsel is well founded. Check all that they give with your heart. For there is your compass that will serve you most true. Seek comfort in comradery, for that is why we see fit to be called friends. Our arms are ever poised to catch a friend who's stumbled along life's journeys. And I dare say, stronger arms then those of our forum, you shall never find. Yes, Sherack, rest easy here for no better company could you find than that of which you already have here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazy_dog no.3 Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 Sorry for ya Sher, but, that happens. Also I don't want to be rude, but what does sentimental mean? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherack Nhar Posted September 10, 2002 Author Share Posted September 10, 2002 I meant a crappy love story. No offense taken... I'm glad you pay attention like that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Homer Posted September 10, 2002 Share Posted September 10, 2002 just remember what "Norm" from Cheers said once, "Women, can't live with 'em.......pass the beer nuts." (no offense, STTCT) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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