Havoc Stryphe Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 I just thought this could be a fun thread. We poke fun at companies, countries, people etc... by making comments like: In Hell, all PC's are forced to have Microsoft Windows ME for operating sytems. In Hell, All TV stations are Ronco Paid advertisement infomercials. In Hell, Every Room has a life size photo of Darth Homer staring at you. Now go on and try your own. Just remember, this is all in fun. No flaming please!
Boba Rhett Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, your shoes are always three sizes too small. In Hell, no soup for you! In Hell, AOL is the only ISP. And why not? After all, it was invented by Satan. In Hell, the key component of underwear is iron wool. In Hell, you can never find the remote. In Hell, All Folk rock. All the time!* In Hell, you don't eat the ham sandwiches. The ham sandwiches eat YOU! In Hell, your sandwiches will have a scorpions in them - but not every day. That's why it's hell, kid. * = well, some is good.
Havoc Stryphe Posted January 21, 2003 Author Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, everyone is forced to drive '82 Stationwagons with wooden paneling down the side. In Hell, all milk is powdered, non-fat! In Hell, everyone is forced to exercise with Richard Simmons every morning. In Hell, The grass really is always greener on the otherside. In Hell, Newspapers are all printed solely in "1337"!
Treacherous Mercenary Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In hell, your computer has the windows 3.1 OS In hell, your HDD size is 1GB or less In hell, your total RAM is 48 In hell, all server crashes are accounted for overheating
Boba Rhett Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, The year is 2003 and people have only advanced as far as the commadore 64. Blazing along at 1.02mhz and with a whopping 64k of ram! They didn't even have harddrives.
Kylilin Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, the only movie that's playing is Glitter. In Hell, there's a Starbucks in every mall...(oh...nevermind) In Hell, the Yankees never win the World Series.
Havoc Stryphe Posted January 21, 2003 Author Posted January 21, 2003 Originally posted by Kylilin In Hell, the Yankees never win the World Series. For some of us, that would be heaven! In Hell, the only job you can hold is one that entails saying, "You want fries with that?" In hell, Lucasforums would be moderated by Viper!
Hannibal Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, the Yankees always win the World Series. In Hell, all Celine Dion all the time. 24/7 In Hell, Spice Girls reunion In Hell, Anna Nicole Smith is your mother. Oh yeah, In Hell, Pop-ups, Pop-ups, Pop-ups...
Tie Guy Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, all popcorn is non-fat and butter free In Hell, there is a tape recorder in every room that always playing Andrew Carlburg's laugh. If you knew what i was talking about then you'd all convert this instant, no joke! In Hell, everyone is a pusher. If you played tennis you'd know what i'm talking about In Hell, the power always goes out just as your about to save 4 hours of Final Fantasy playing....grrr.....
Rogue Nine Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, the only thing on TV are televangelists and Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire? In Hell, size does matter.
Hannibal Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 Originally posted by Rogue Nine In Hell, size does matter. Umm, I hate to tell you this Rogue but...
Fishflesh Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 in hell the only forum there would be is Galactic Battlegrounds Off-Topic Discussion
Darth Homer Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, Havoc would follow you around all day (payback's a *****, ain't it?) In Hell, the only game available is Barbie's Hair Salon In Hell, all Polka all the time In Hell, Dark Tides would never get updated....hey, wait a second...
Havoc Stryphe Posted January 21, 2003 Author Posted January 21, 2003 Originally posted by Darth Homer In Hell, Havoc would follow you around all day Who says I don't already? DUN... DUN... DUN!!!
Tie Guy Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 Originally posted by Darth Homer In Hell, Dark Tides would never get updated....hey, wait a second... Hey, don't look at me! In Hell, the only sports on TV are Bowling and Ice Dancing. In Hell, we'd have to go to school for 7 hours a day...err...wait.... In Hell, everytime you get off the phone it rings again right away. In Hell, AP US History is double block In Hell, Democrats run the government.
Artoo Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, there is no such thing as conservativism, all pain is equal and in great amounts. In Hell, all the toilets and showers are clogged. In Hell, there is nothing in the fridge except for moldy leftovers. I'll think of some more later.
Clefo Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In hell, the only movies theaters show is "Biodome" In hell, the only music is a tape of Michael Bolton threatening to kill Conan O'Brien Cleopatra 2525, nuff said
Eets Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 Heh, and here I thought this would be a thread about Havoc visiting his in-laws.. ^_^ In Hell, women only have one boobie. In Hell, that boobie is the shape of a rotten Papaya. In Hell, everyone switches.
Kylilin Posted January 21, 2003 Posted January 21, 2003 In Hell, there's no ESPN. In Hell, the only channel on TV is Lifetime. In Hell, the only sport to play is cricket.
Jatt13 Posted January 22, 2003 Posted January 22, 2003 Origionally posted by Rhett In Hell, your sandwiches will have a scorpions in them - but not every day. That's why it's hell, kid. caught you! Far Side Gallery 2! I just read it! ha! i foiled your plan of global domination by getting everyone to think you're funny by posting a joke you didn't write!! In Hell, the only person allowed to post would be NL_Ackbar. In Hell, you'd have Mr. Martin every class for all eternity (arky's will get it) In Hell, the only video games you're allowed to play are Olsen Twin games. *shudder* In Hell, you'd have a monster sound system for your car, but the bass is permantly turned off.
Eets Posted January 22, 2003 Posted January 22, 2003 Originally posted by Jatt13 In Hell, the only video games you're allowed to play are Olsen Twin games. *shudder* Hmm.. thanks for saying "Video" games... ^_^
Lord Fergie Posted January 22, 2003 Posted January 22, 2003 What if there were no Mel Brooks?!?!?!?! (shudders at such a dark thought)
Treacherous Mercenary Posted January 22, 2003 Posted January 22, 2003 In hell, Lord Fergie would moderate the forums.
Eets Posted January 22, 2003 Posted January 22, 2003 In Hell, Sherack's taste in music would be standard.
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